March 27, 2007

"I am self-involved, mercurial and comfortable eating dinners of frozen waffles in my underpants."

I understand. And why do you like to live alone? Or -- in case you don't live alone -- what exactly would you like about it if you did?

25 comments:

Peter Palladas said...

If I were Greg I'd be telling Henry:

1. I don't much care to be drawn into the public gaze in this manner without my active consent and right to reply.

2. If that's your idea of co-habiting, then it's just that - your idea not mine.

3. The 'Greg Years' not only are over, they clearly never began.

But then what do I know about the dynamics of home-making between homosexualist couples?

Jennifer said...

But, you're not Greg and it apparently it works for him and Henry. Funny that.

I don't live alone, but whenever my husband is in the field or deployed and the kids are asleep, it's a nice little slice of living alone. And I enjoy stupid little things about it. Like watching a movie I've seen way too many times, and then immediately watching it again with director commentary. And having everything exactly where I want it, if only for a few hours at a time. Drinking wine and eating animal crackers. Stupid little things that I enjoy immensely.

MadisonMan said...

I will never understand people who can put aside a check for $7632 and forget about it.

Peter Palladas said...

...says Henry.

Richard Fagin said...

Frankly, I'm sick to death of being in the office at 6:15 AM, working 'til late afternoon and then having to come home and do laundry and pick her shoes up from all over the house and put them away.

If I lived alone I'd only have one job instead of three. I might live an extra five years from the reduced stress.

What kind of person (other than one making ten mil a year or more) forgets to cash a check for more than $7000? These New Yorkers really DO seem to be on a different planet than the rest of us.

Jennifer said...

LOL. I wasn't sure if it was just me that thought that was nuts. I can't even imagine having $700 in loose change stashed unknowingly. A $7k check...? Sheeeew. High class problem.

Oligonicella said...

Shopping for towels? And The New York Times looks down on blogs? This reads like a blogger plodding on about every detail of their day.

I'm enjoying not being told I don't do enough.

Hoosier Daddy said...

Probably the larger issue here for him is that at 44, its probably tough to get used to having someone sharing your living space, the key word being 'sharing'.

People are creatures of habit and the longer you have been used to doing something or living a certain way, the harder it is to cope when that is turned upside down with a roommate. Its called compromise and the lack of it in relationships nowadays is generally why there is a 50% plus divorce rate.

I will never understand people who can put aside a check for $7632 and forget about it.

Probably because you're not an artsy rich type who probably spends that much on bath towels.

Melinda said...

These New Yorkers really DO seem to be on a different planet than the rest of us.

Some New Yorkers are just on a different planet from most New Yorkers.

Slocum said...

What kind of person (other than one making ten mil a year or more) forgets to cash a check for more than $7000?

I've done that -- more or less. I'm a partner in a small company and our income isn't entirely predictable. When things are like that, you keep a lot more in cash savings than you might if you had a completely steady paycheck. So when checks come in, they go into the big pile in the bank, and I really don't track the balance that closely all the time, so it's possible to forget to deposit a check for several thousand dollars.

(BTW, I don't make anywhere near 10 million a year or a million a year, for that matter).

The Emperor said...

Personally, I prefer to heat up the waffles before putting them in my underpants. (And no syrup, obviously.)

bearing said...

Oh, I loved living alone, back when I was in college and the first year of graduate school before I got married. I also loved traveling alone, and even eating at restaurants alone, people-watching or reading. I still love going out to lunch by myself, taking with me a good book or some light paperwork to do. And I liked going to bed alone with a good book that I could read as late into the night as I wanted.

I loved having a whole apartment that was my own space. I loved the quiet. I loved just not having to be responsible for anyone, and not having to worry about whether I was being a good enough roommate (being by nature socially awkward and probably somewhere on the Asperger's spectrum, having to live with a roommate chosen by lottery is one of my personal definitions of hell).

I'm married and have three kids. I love that too, it's a different kind of nice. But I sometimes fantasize about having my own room.

Cat said...

I liked this article.

I have never lived with a BF, but I just got a room mate (not a stranger, but not a friend) for the first time in 16 years for financial reasons for both of us. There is definitely a host/guest feel as much as I try to make her feel comfortable (it's my place), but she's always asking, "OK if I watch TV with you?" kind of questions. Thankfully, I have two bathrooms.

Also, I hate having to put on pants rather than just being in a t-shirt and nothing else, being able to leave the bathroom open all the time, I am annoyed by food splatter not cleaned up; I am annoyed with all of the lights going on and never off (I took the bulb out of the one by my bedroom so it doesn't disturb my sleep); and by the fact that she doesn't like my cats and is always pointing out something she thinks they did (steal her earings for example - I told her without thumbs they can't open the jewelry box and besides, their ears aren't pierced!)


No I wouldn't have a $7K check lying around (it would be deposited on the spot), but I understand the loose change. My mom once collected $25 in change loose here and there in my house and car. Thanks mom!

Fatmouse said...

>And why do you like to live alone?

Volume control. Sometimes I like it loud. Sometimes quiet. And that's hard to regulate if you're sharing a place with someone.

Which is why I will never go back to living in an apartment, since it seems to be a law for every neighbor of mine to have a giant stereo on the other side of the wall.

Internet Ronin said...

Thanks, Cat for a good laugh:

I told her without thumbs they can't open the jewelry box and besides, their ears aren't pierced!)

As to this:

My mom once collected $25 in change loose here and there in my house and car.

Your mother gave it back to you? Was she cleaning your house and car for some special reason? You're a lucky guy! Once old enough to know better, while living at home, my mom's policy was "I found it. I keep it," particularly if found at the bottom of the washer. LOL!

Control Rat X said...

Oooh I can't wait to live alone again. I grew up in a very large loud chaotic family where there was no such thing as peace or quiet or privacy. When I was little I would spend hours playing with a dollhouse, not with the dolls, but just arranging the furniture and making a perfect little world.

My current world is less than perfect, and I have lots of spare change filling bowls on various surfaces. (Older child was a ceramics major for a while. I have lots of bowls. And lots of naked ladies.) Maybe I'll take it all to the change-counting machine and see if it's $700 worth. Kinda doubt it.

Cat said...

IR, you're welcome.

My mom gave it back to me to show me how much money I have lying around and put it in a tea tin. She just noticed that I had change here, and change there (I had a Chevy Citation with one of those front seats that's like a sofa) and it became kind of a game. However, she used to keep change that came out in the laundry and any loose fries ("freebies") in a bag were hers on the rare occaision she treated us kids to McDonalds.

Revenant said...

What kind of person (other than one making ten mil a year or more) forgets to cash a check for more than $7000?

A person who doesn't *need* $7000 at that particular time. If you're single, childless, and renting, and have a good job, odds are you have a lot of disposable income and no big expenses to worry about.

When you don't need money, you don't spend a lot of time worrying about money. Add in the fact that so many monthly financial transactions (such as billing and paycheck deposit) can be handled automatically, and it is easy for disorganized people to forget about that sort of thing.

Galvanized said...

LOL I'm still laughing at the comparing the "eerie textural similarity of sisal rugs to Triscuits." This post was funny.

Chances are, had I ever lived alone, I would have preferred it forever. You can let the gut deflate in stretch pants at the end of the day, skip dinner, and eat an entire pint of Blue Bell Fudge Brownie Nut ice cream while watching recorded episodes of The Office and Colbert Report. Well, that's what I would have done. (sigh) Shameful, I know...

J.R. said...

I didn't marry until I was 36, it has been 12 years now. I miss living alone. Though I would never eat a waffle in my underpants, the elastic in the waistband is problematic.

My wife goes to visit her family for weeks on end. She knows that I can't wait for her to get out of the house. I adore my time alone. Music, or television, at any volume I like. Staying up as late as I wish without disturbing anyone. Coming and going as I please. It makes me wonder if I am really cut out for being married. And you can't miss someone unless they go away occasionally.

Ruth Anne Adams said...

I would have used that "found" $7k to rent a bigger apartment.

Finn Kristiansen said...

Hmmm. Sometimes when I read the NY Times I feel like they are slipping a mickey into my reading, working other angles and winking at me, saying, "Oh, nothing to see here, read away."

So I won't go there, about Henry, or Greg, or the happily cartoony picture of the lovers. I shall stick to the issue at hand.

I've lived alone for about 11 years now, and before that, with parents. At times I am desperately lonely, though that, I've learned, is not likely a function of living alone, but rather my own social retardedness, certain character flaws, and visual ordinaryness.

But the aloneness itself, the space and freedom, is quite nice. My buddy John is married, and of course must compromise (as does his wife) and I see the tension and frustration in their eyes. They play tennis with each other, wacking away at points far above my head, with no love in sight (or so it appears).

So I rightly like the opportunity to decorate as I please, eat what I want, and get into battles with the biker neighbors upstairs as to whether my Alison Krauss or Jars of Clay will drown out there Creedance, or whether we will all be consumed by the thumping reggaeton coming from across the way.

Pretty much everything here is dirtier than it would be if I were not alone, and I would have furniture (which I don't really have, and which I keep meaning to buy once I am sure that I want to stay here in Arizona). It's been 7 years alone in Phoenix, after 4 years or so alone in New Jersey.

I don't know if that will ever change, or if love might appear, but all I can do is blast my Crowded House and hope for that gift one day. I love and hate my space.

J. Peden said...

"It's not that I don't like people, it's just that I feel so much better when I'm not around them."
Dennis Quaid, Barfly

Ann Althouse said...

It's not Dennis Quaid. It's Mickey Rourke.

Parker Smith said...

Cat -

The french fries that are found in the bottom of a fast food bag are properly known as "trench fries".

Carry on.