I think Trader Joe's opens at 8 a.m., so what time were people talking right under his window? 6? 5? One solution is to become an early riser. You'd be better off anyway. Another is to get some noise-cancellation earbuds or extra-strong earplugs. But obviously, telling person after person to be quiet isn't going to work. You have to be awake already to do it, and there are new people arriving into your zone continually.
The adaptation Luker — close to "lurker" — used is to lean into the eavesdropping that life had imposed upon him and to make signs transcribing what he hears. The NYT calls it "a Covid-19 version of 'Stan Mack’s Real Life Funnies,' the beloved 1970s and ’80s column in the Village Voice." Oh! "Stan Mack’s Real Life Funnies" — I loved that. I am one of the sources of love that made that a beloved comic (or "column," as the NYT puts it).
Anyway, Luker hangs his signs from his first-floor brownstone window, and he also photographs the signs and posts the photos on Instagram. Go to that link to read them all. I'll just cherry-pick one:
Posts
67 comments:
"And he cheerfully subordinates his preference and accepts the leadership she offers."
Of course. They're shopping.
Never heard of Stan Mack, but I knew a guy who was a theater critic at the Village Voice: Robert Masea.
Bob was a Norte Dame alum. His suite mates didn’t know he was gay.
A family friend left NYC when COVID broke there and has not returned. I wonder if she will ever return. She is 77 and lived on a 4th floor walk up.
With COVID and Mayor Debased, I hope she stays in TX and does not return to NYC.
OF COURSE it's news. It happened on the Upper West Side.
Now if it were a bodega in Queens or on Staten Island, nobody would care. People get shot in those boroughs. They get Covid.
All the news that happens in my little world.
New York City is a foreign country as far as I'm concerned.
One solution is to become an early riser.
Maybe. I tried that my first year in college, and it didn't work. You can't be an early riser if the people around you are making noise until 2:00 AM.
Maybe put “Line forms here” signs which force the shoppers to queue up from the other direction... or better, “No queuing allowed due to COVID”.
Complaining that the COVID quiet is now being disturbed. How quiet in the mornings was it before COVID?
(My son comes to Michigan from Boston and says it is too quiet for him to sleep.)
New York City is a foreign country as far as I'm concerned.
I'm with you, Greg.
After reading the pics on the link, I'm thinking it's a marketing ploy as he's finished everyone with a TJ product.
I’ve stood in that line at the Upper West Side TRADER JOE’S, though it’s not my usual shopping choice. It’s quite a few blocks away from me. However, it has great prices and certain products not available at my neighborhood food stores. In my experience, most queued shoppers are by themselves and not engaging in much conversation with those around them. Also, those in line maintain several feet of separation between each other. This is not to say there is NO conversation, or even that, at times, it might become audible to those living in in the apartments above. However, normal NYC street noise from auto traffic usually will drown out the sound of voices. I must admit I have never gone there at 6:00 am or earlier to queue up.
New York City is a foreign country as far as I'm concerned.
And thanks to DeBlasio those foreigners with their filthy habits (drinking at 5:00, voting Democrat) are being exported to redder, saner states.
If people in the queue are maintaining proper social distancing, then they have to speak up in order to be heard. Or maybe they're talking on cell phones rather than to one another.
New York City IS a foreign country...a WONDERFUL contrast to the dreary sameness of the rest of the country.
The NYT story on the Trader Joe's line linked to another NYT story that had information about Stan Mack's association with the NYT that I was completely unaware of:
AT WORK WITH: Stan Mack; Walk Backward, Carry a Big Bic
By Georgia Dullea
May 21, 1992
'...in the early 1970's. He was the art director of The New York Times Magazine, and his comic strip, "Mule's Diner," was running in The National Lampoon. "That strip had a lumpy line," he says. "I drew it on the train."
About this time, he persuaded a Times editor to send him out on a story with a reporter. A change of pace, he said, comic drawings instead of photographs. Well, it was a silly story about a Connecticut garden club, and yes, you were the reporter.
Now you're having a flashback to the garden club scene. You remember glancing at his pad. He was sketching the club's president, as directed. But he was also writing down her words. "Stan," you said, sweetly, "just do the visuals. I do the quotes." When the article and the accompanying cartoons appeared in the paper, his quotes were better than yours.
You worked together two, maybe three, more times. It was no use. The showdown came in a shopping mall: "Stan, you're writing stuff again. Don't try to cover your pad. I saw you writing stuff. Cut this out, or do your own stories. Stop walking backward! Stan!"
He resigned as art director soon after that. He said something about going out into the world to draw real people.'
I really loved his work.
I was having a hard time figuring out what this has to do with Covid. Everyone in NYC lives inside everyone else's asshole. That's just the way urban life is. What has that got to do with Covid? Then I realized, that in NYC, those stupid signs about how many people can go inside the store at one time must actually have some bearing on human existence! Like, someone is counting!
Christ, these poor assholes actually drank the fucking Kool-aid. What a maroon.
Robert, you ignorant slut. The rest of the country is suffused with localisms. Accents, dialect, professions, industries, artforms, coronary inducing foods, favorite intoxicants, geography, outdoor sports, hobbies, style of dress, etc, etc.
NY is just a distillation of a limited slice of the vast diversity the world has to offer. You need to get around more and be creative when venturing out in the wild to appreciate the limitations of the hothouse zoo megalopolis.
After the great exodus from NYC, Cookie will be found huddled in his apartment in seven layers of clothing and using a sterno heater to cook his food because the power grid has shut down. But not to worry--he will have the similarly huddled homeless to keep him company.
Blogger Robert Cook said...
"New York City IS a foreign country...a WONDERFUL contrast to the dreary sameness of the rest of the country."
"What brave new world is this that has such people in it?"
New York beta men.
Not sure why anyone would pass by actual meat or produce stands or shops in New York, or even a real grocery that handles fresh goods, to buy those things at Trader Joe's. I get Trader Joe's and like it for a few niche items (not fresh produce and meat). But then, I'm sure there's reasons, like- too hard to drive around New York to get to other stores. Covid lock-down. Covid fear. We'd rather stand in line with 75 other people than risk driving out to another store. Or...who has a car?
It'd be like passing 6 great bakeries to pick up a loaf of stale bread at Trader Joe's.
"One solution is to become an early riser.
Another is to move out of the city.
So, yes, I did move out of New York City. Out of the Upper West Side (years ago, when it was still affordable).
It used to be a nice place to visit; now it's not even that. Unless you really can't find comparable employment elsewhere, why pay $1000s monthly to live in a shoebox (and queue up to get into a Trader Joe's, and practically everything else) if you don't absolutely have to?
What's the title of that book? "The Future Used to Happen Here"? Yes, it used to. But it, too moved out and there's no sign it's coming back anytime soon.
New York used to be a nice museum: see the Empire State bldg, the Chrysler, the United Nations, Lincoln Center, Central Park, MoMa. It's still (sort of) a mid-20th-century museum (if you look for it). But its residents and establishment seem to be working hard to destroy even that.
“If people in the queue are maintaining proper social distancing, then they have to speak up in order to be heard. Or maybe they're talking on cell phones rather than to one another.”
As I said, in my experience, there is not much conversation among those in line, and such talking as there is is not boisterous or loud.
And he cheerfully subordinates his preference and accepts the leadership she offers.
Obviously. Look at the picture, it's Cosmo and Wanda.
“Not sure why anyone would pass by actual meat or produce stands or shops in New York, or even a real grocery that handles fresh goods, to buy those things at Trader Joe's.”
I think many New Yorkers do buy different items at different stores. I only walk the distance to TRADER JOE’S for certain items they carry that no one else does, or for common items (peanut butter and the like) that they sell cheaper than other stores. I also shop at WEST SIDE MARKET, GRISTEDES, and WHOLE FOODS, depending on what I’m looking for. There are also specialty stores that sell spices and food items not typically found in chain markets.
I bought some Bose noise cancelling ear buds a few years ago and they have changed my life. Along with the soothing sleep app they help me sleep when my wife wants to stay up and watch TV. Get the wired ones, not the crappy wireless set, through the Althouse portal.
Bagpipe music, played loud, will move the line across the street.
I've always loved the image of Tristan Jones motoring his (borrowed) catamaran down the Danube in a fog with bagpipe music in lieu of a fog horn.
Probably a sea story, most of his exploits were, but sea stories and fairy tales are often better than real life anyway.
I loved Tristan books.
John Henry
Too bad they wouldn't let in WalMart with prices the average person can afford.
So lining up at TJ's (been to one, didn't go back) just like they did in Moscow. No wonder they vote for DeB, AOC, and Biden.
Or here's another thought
Set up a camera and Mike then livestream the line to YouTube.
Put a sign with the link.
That will keep people from talking or even standing in front of your house.
John Henry
I would expect New Yorkers to laugh at this sort of passive aggression. This guy should count himself lucky; he could be living in Minneapolis, where a bunch of Trader Joe's shoppers burned down the whole inner city.
So it's a "stereotype reversal" for a man to subordinate his preferences to his wife's? Ha! Ask any man who's been married 30 years about that. What you'll get is a sigh and "Happy wife, happy life."
"One solution is to become an early riser."
It's a great solution if it works for you. How do you feel about being kept awake until 2AM? Are you polite about it?
City-living's "get off my lawn".
The only proper response to wifely commands is “I hear and obey,” spoken in a robotic monotone.
"obviously, telling person after person to be quiet isn't going to work"
Only one thing will work: move to a red state, where you don't have to live in an apartment right above a TJ line and where people are kind and considerate.
It had never occurred to me until now that Robert Cook might have a New York accent. Puts his posts into a whole new light.
fake news
Ah, summer nights in NY City and the sounds wafting through the air shaft. It was a village, a small village, and all the windows were open :)
I used to go to the Trader Joes near me because they had the most authentic baguettes anywhere. They changed bakers and wouldn't tell me who used to bake them. No more Trader Joes for me. Aldis has better produce anyway. Meat either comes from the field or Costco.
I pass a place in Michigan when I visit my brother that will sell you either a whole or half a cow. I'm gonna check that out next time I go. my wife likes Fresh Thyme. I find it pretentious. It's organic! So what?
AA you are far too nice arranging your life to enable the bad manners of the shoppers.
Either that or too non-confrontational.
How about a good old fashioned New York 'Shut the fuck up!'
Or ice water dropped from on high.
How to not get annoyed with the Trader Joe lines under your window, By Ann Althouse: Just get up early.
Noise cancelling earbuds won't work. Those are designed to highlight voice. When the noise-cancelling headphones came out, I was working noisy research ships and bought some. Worked to tone down the low freq-roar. But brought the higher frequency fan noise to the fore along with people speaking. Then after removing the headphones, you returned to the dull roar, but now with the fan noise noticeable.
People talking may be harder, but I lived along a commuter route in downtown Norfolk ten or so years back. Around 5 am, the road noise went up outside my apartment. Only solution was to put on my iPod through a speaker at low volume when I went to bed so that the change in noise level at 5 am was no longer as apparent.
I guess I don't understand some things. In my younger days I lived in apartments and at one point owned a condo (a flat, as opposed to a town-house type) and got used to other peoples noise pretty quickly. My upstairs neighbor at the condo used to get up and lift weights pretty early in the morning. I'd wake up to a loud "thunk" the first time he'd set the bar down, say to myself "Oh, that's Tony working out", then go right back to sleep. It's just a tolerance you have to develop if you're going to live in that environment. When they come in drunk at 3AM and blast "More Than A Feeling" at full volume you can get rightfully pissed off , but you can't get upset at a reasonable amount of everyday living noise.
"Bob was a Norte Dame alum. His suite mates didn’t know he was gay."
I have very strong ties to that school via family.
Nowadays, Bob would get preferential admissions and a medal upon arrival to campus.
"New York City IS a foreign country...a WONDERFUL contrast to the dreary sameness of the rest of the country."
New Your USED TO BE a fantastic, chaotic place.
Now? It's a liberal shithole wet dream.
Typical 'We're better than everyone else' attitude.
Get off your fucking island and see the country and the world some time.
"New Your USED TO BE..."
New York...
"Every day these people would wake us up. At first, I was polite and asked them to please be quiet. Then after a few days I was shouting, and my husband was like: 'Stop it! You can’t do that.'"
Said Kyle Luker, whose window — on Manhattan's Upper West Side — is just above where people line up for an hours-long wait to get into Trader Joe’s. He's quoted in "Anything You Say in This Trader Joe’s Line May Be Used Against You" (NYT).
Tough year and decade for pronouns. They should have filed a friend of the court brief in the gay marriage case and spared us all the confusion.
But Kyle and his husband do seem to be clever guys:
Dan,
We are super happy that you are excited for season 107 of Supernatural - the stories just get better! But we are napping in here & they are out of avocados anyway. So please just go home and order delivery. XOXO
#TraderJoesLineUWS
That bit about Supernatural hit the bullseye.
Much more of their work at https://ilovetheupperwestside.com/messages-to-people-talking-loudly-on-the-trader-joes-line/
And one more thing, Robert Cook...return to the natives the island that was stolen from them.
Better late than never.
These people in "The City," living in their sad, noisy, decaying little boxes, stacked atop one another and packed in side by side with the windows barred to protect them from their neighbors can take their problems, almost all of which are of their own creation, and stuff them up their collective asses.
Once, they and I were on the same side. Not anymore.
Contra that, the guy at the top of the stairs looks more like a good ole boy than a cosmopolitan.
The hell?
Not everyone is retired. Saying 'just wake up earlier' is a poor suggestion.
Some work different hours and are trying to sleep at that time.
I spent a lot of time and a price premium to get a home in a quiet area. I sympathize with these people more than you, but empathy is still bad.
NC headphones restrict the head. And earplugs keep you from hearing the alarm.
is just above where people line up for an hours-long wait to get into Trader Joe’s
If there's a line at Trader Joe's in Madison, I just go back later. There is no reason to live in a city where lines are always present. Ugh. That's my definition of horrible.
Life is too short to spend time waiting in line.
They could move - or shut their windows, or just shut up about all of their petty issues.
I'd start pouring water out the window onto the people talking loudly
Or sue Trader Joes. Make it Trader Joes problem to get the people to quiet down.
OTOH, what I'd really do is what I've done: not live in a city
New York City IS a foreign country...a WONDERFUL contrast to the dreary sameness of the rest of the country.
Yes, after arriving at JFK, picking up a rental car and seeing a few couches burning on street corners as we made our way to the road that would take us to Rye Brook back in ‘91, my wife and I did feel a sense of contrast with where we live.
Our go to grocery around here is Market Basket. We do do Trader Joe's on occasion, they have good inexpensive wine and beer. They also have some inexpensive coffee I like to use for making cold brew.
Mrs. stevew and I do not shop together, so there is no talking, of any kind, from us in line. Oh, is there a line because of the restrictions on the number of people that can be in the store? If so, take up your complaint with the city.
"Yes, after arriving at JFK, picking up a rental car and seeing a few couches burning on street corners as we made our way to the road that would take us to Rye Brook back in ‘91, my wife and I did feel a sense of contrast with where we live."
Me and three others made the mistake of driving from midtown to Yankee stadium in the mid-'80s.
There were entire blocks in the Bronx that had been reduced to piles of rubble.
Stripped cars up on blocks in the streets in Harlem.
We were the only white people within 30 blocks in any direction.
It looked like Beirut...that Giuliani sure was an asshole...
NYC is full of pretentious douches who think they're special simply because they live in NYC. Is there any more glaring example than resident, one-dimensional, pseudo-radical snob Cookie?
"It had never occurred to me until now that Robert Cook might have a New York accent. Puts his posts into a whole new light."
He's a transplant from Florida. So if the accent exists, it's, like his juvenile, attention-whoring "ooh look at me even the radical aren't radical enough for me" politics, utterly contrived.
My wife loves to shop, leisurely, whatever time is required
When I shop, I have an objective, I storm the beach, take that high ground, and it’s Miller Time...
@Iman: that is precisely why mrs. stevew and I stopped shopping together many, many years ago. We celebrated our 40th this past August.
Blue city democrats almost exclusively shop at Tj's. That's why I have mostly avoided it. First, they only allow shopping carts inside the store, no hand baskets. Also just about everyone shopping there drives with a mask on even when alone in the car. I don't want to be shopping with a bunch of loonies who would gladly reprimand you in public if your mask slips or your 3 year old won't wear one.
I hate shopping of any kind. One bright feature of the pandemic is that I can shop online and pick up my groceries at the store without even going in. Love it!
No it’s a sign of modern times just being like the old time. He has the talent for produce from his day job. She has talent, like Toobin, beating her meat while at home.
God I'm happy being single with a "friend"
"I hate shopping of any kind. One bright feature of the pandemic is that I can shop online and pick up my groceries at the store without even going in. Love it!"
I hate shopping for clothes, but I've always enjoyed grocery shopping. I like the brightly lighted spaces where food is sold, and I enjoy wandering the aisles, just perusing all the items available. It comes from my childhood. My brothers and I, when little, would accompany our mother to the grocery store, and I found the sounds, the colorful packages, the endless novelty and the overall ambience of a large supermarket to be exciting and cheerful.
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