December 18, 2016

Goodbye to Zsa Zsa.

"Zsa Zsa Gabor, the Hungarian actress whose self-parodying glamour and revolving-door marriages to millionaires put a luster of American celebrity on a long but only modestly successful career in movies and television, died on Sunday in Los Angeles. She was probably 99."

It's April again/And lovers are lining the banks of the Seine....


rhhardin said...

Radio Derb mentioned she was sick a few weeks ago at age 99, and thanked her for years of harmless pleasure, and wished her get well or an easy passing, whichever she preferred.

I always found her boring, meaning not funny, but then I threw out my TV in 1970.

rhhardin said...

Her accent lives on, unfortunately, in the first lady.

Michael K said...

I liked her in Moulin Rouge and GiGi. Her sisters Eva and Magda were also great beauties form Hungary who came here after the war. Her mother had a jewelry story.

traditionalguy said...

She was a cute woman and a good wife...proven over and over.

rhhardin said...

Given my vast experience with divorce... and it is vast... my guess is that there's
a lot of wiggle room. Hell, you could probably get it annulled as long as you didn't... never mind.

- Laws of Attraction

hiawatha biscayne said...

I thought Zsa Zsa went to the taxidermist years ago.

Original Mike said...

"She was probably 99"

Oh hell, give her the hundred!

Comanche Voter said...

I'll miss the lady. She made the most of what she had--and she had a lot.

Michael said...

She was Miss Hungary before any of us were born. RIP. Hopefully you had a peaceful exit.

Ken B said...

Crazy beautiful, and goodspirited about her limited talent.

rcocean said...

I always liked Eva Gabor better, she had a better sense of humor. All I can remember of Zsa Zsa is that she was constantly on the all the old talk shows my mother watched "Mike Douglas" "Merv Griffin" and someone else that I can't remember. So, I always thought of her as old bore, but I've seen some of her stuff from the 50s and she was quite cute and pretty.

William said...

She lived quite a long life and perhaps she would have been more comfortable in another era. The last flower of the Hapsburg Empire. She had the flow and playfulness of a Viennese waltz.

Laslo Spatula said...

Sketchy Guy Who Works at the Adult Bookstore says:

There is a gently befuddled old man who visits the store here every few weeks; perhaps his most distinguishing feature in these parts is that he is clean and well-groomed, save for the white hairs prickling in his ears. The first time he came he wandered aimlessly through the aisles for awhile, and I thought he must be in the wrong place: maybe someones dementia-addled grandfather got away from his home, perhaps…

Of course, this did not prove to be the case. After his aimless wandering he approached the counter and asked if we had any films of Jaynes Mansfield fucking…

“I’m sorry, but we don’t carry old Hollywood movies,” I said, believing I misheard him. But, no: I did not mishear him.

“I want to see Jaynes Mansfield fucking,” he replied, nodding. “I’m sure there must be some films around of Jaynes Mansfield fucking.”

“Not that I know of,” I answered, adding that he might check out the internet but don’t get his hopes up…

He left the store shaking his head, but was back a few weeks later.

“I want to see Kim Novak fucking,” he said, looking me in the eye, “Not Hollywood shit, but real fucking.”

“I’m afraid all we have of stars fucking is in the “Celebrities Fucking” aisle.”

“I looked there,” he said, shaking his head. “I don’t know who any of those young people are. Except Paris Hilton. That girl can really suck a cock, I tell you.”

A few weeks later he returned again.

“I want to see Rhonda Fleming fucking,” he said, looking me in the eye, “Not Hollywood shit, but real fucking.”

“I’m not familiar with her,” I replied.

“Not familiar with her? She was in “Spellbound”: that was a great movie, I tell you.”

“That was Hitchcock, right?”

“Yes, yes. Hitch had an eye for the women. I’d love to see any of his stars fucking: Grace Kelly, Ingrid Bergman, Kim Novak, Tippi Hedren. Those were REAL women.”

“Indeed,” I said: I love a good Hitchcock film, and Hitchcock DID have great taste in blondes...

“I’d love to see Grace Kelly get fucked in the ass. I bet Cary Grant, he fucked her in the ass. I bet.”

“I would watch that,” I said, and he smiled in camaraderie.

“What about Zsa Zsa Gabor? Do you have any films of her fucking?”

“Zsa Zsa? Wow. I’m afraid not…”

“She HAD to be a dirty, dirty girl, for all those men to marry her. She must have definitely liked getting fucked in the ass. Most Hungarian girls like getting fucked in the ass.”

“I didn’t know that.”

“Oh, you bet. Dirty, dirty girls, those Hungarians. I bet Zsa Zsa had gang-bangs by the dozens: cocks in her mouth, cocks in her ass — I sure would like to get a film of it.”

“If I see anything you’ll be the first to know.”

“I appreciate that, son,” he said before he left. Strange old guy, but I have to admit: he is probably the only customer I look forward to seeing again…

I am Laslo.

tcrosse said...

There's a modern Hilton hotel on Castle Hill in Budapest. Our tour guide informed us that it would not have been built there but for the influence of Zsa Zsa on her first hubby, Nicky Hilton. What a goulash she was.

tcrosse said...

Laszlo, sajnos nem bezelek magyarul.

David said...

Who says Zsa Zsa was "modestly successful." Moderately talented perhaps, but very beautiful, interesting and (unless I miss my guess) achieved all of her personal goals.

MayBee said...

This reminds me of the funniest concept Althouse ever came up with. The idea that Zsa Zsa would try to die at a time she could get into a prestigious celebrity death triad

Unknown said...

>This reminds me of the funniest concept Althouse ever came up with.
>The idea that Zsa Zsa would try to die at a time she could get into a
>prestigious celebrity death triad

Well, she died the same week Peter Cushing came back. That's gotta count for something..

Big Mike said...

Her accent lives on, unfortunately, in the first lady.

@rhhardin, you can't tell a Hungarian accent from a proper Slovenian accent? Jebi se!

LYNNDH said...

She was the Kim Kardashian of her time, but very much nicer.

Jon Ericson said...

Charlie Freak
Steely Dan

Charlie Freak had but one thing to call his own
Three weight ounce pure golden ring no precious stone
Five nights without a bite
No place to lay his head
And if nobody takes him in
He'll soon be dead
On the street he spied my face I heard him hail
In our plot of frozen space he told his tale
Poor man, he showed his hand
So righteous was his need
And me so wise I bought his prize
For chicken feed
Newfound cash soon begs to smash a state of mind
Close inspection fast revealed his favorite kind
Poor kid, he overdid
Embraced the spreading haze
And while he sighed his body died
In fifteen ways
When I heard I grabbed a cab to where he lay
'Round his arm the plastic tag read D.O.A.
Yes Jack, I gave it back
The ring I could not own
Now come my friend I'll take your hand
And lead you home

© Universal Music Publishing Group
For non-commercial use only.

fivewheels said...

She was the Kim Kardashian of her time, but very much nicer.

Also more talented, more attractive, more original and far more quotable.

"How many husbands have I had? You mean apart from my own?"

"I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house."

"To a smart girl men are no problem - they're the answer."

Mark Jones said...

Best joke about Zsa Zsa I ever heard was by David Letterman. His "Top Ten Worst Things About Living Forever"...

"It's your turn to marry one of the Gabor sisters."

Mac McConnell said...

The Gabor sisters were funny and beautiful, never hurt anyone and never had a reality TV show. God bless them.

Laslo Spatula said...

Sketchy Guy Who Works at the Adult Bookstore says:

The well-groomed, gently befuddled man returned to the store this afternoon. Considering that most of the patrons here can’t even seem to wipe their own asses properly, he is pleasant to talk to with, a window into a previous world — a simpler world where celebrities didn’t routinely film their own sexual escapades on their iPhones…

“I want to see Shirley Jones fucking,” he said, looking me in the eye, “Not Hollywood shit, but real fucking.”

“Shirley Jones? The mother from “The Partridge Family”? I used to see reruns of that when I was a kid.”

“She was more than the mother from “The Partridge Family”: she was in “Oklahoma” and “The Music Man”. She played an angry whore in “Elmer Gantry.”

The mother from “The Partridge Family” as an angry whore? I’d like to see that.”

“And I’d like to see her sucking cock.”

“You know, I had kind of a crush on her when I was a kid. Something about her eyes.”

“Oh yeah. Her eyes showed that she knew certain things. She pretended to be wholesome, but those were bedroom eyes and those were cock-sucking lips.”

“When I was a kid I liked to fantasize that I was with her daughter from the show, and Shirley would walk in and join us.”

“Susan Dey was hot, I give you that, but even then she was too young for my tastes. I like my women gently seasoned.”

“Sure, sure.”

“Young women, they don’t know all the tricks, you know what I mean? At least back then,” he added, looking over the aisles of films of young girls being fucked by multiple men in multiple orifices, girls with rings through their vagina and tattoos on their asshole.

“You know when I knew I was getting old?” he asked.


“When all the women I had once wanted to fuck started showing up on “The Love Boat.”

“My great-aunt used to watch that show.”

“All the old stars would show up. Even Zsa Zsa. You seen any films of Zsa Zsa fucking yet?”

“Not yet, but I am keeping my eye out for you.”

“I appreciate that. Zsa Zsa was Hungarian. Those Hungarian girls like to get fucked in the ass, did you know that?”

“I think I heard that somewhere before.”

“When I was in the Army I fucked a Hungarian girl. She wanted it in the ass. First time I ever did it that way.”

“Proof, right there…”

“Everyone says it is the Italian girls that like to get fucked in the ass, but the Hungarian girls, they have the Italians beat.”

“It’s a Big World out there.”

“I dated an Italian girl after the Army. I would try to put it in her ass, but then she would start reciting the Rosary.”

“That probably killed the mood.”

“That and the crucifix above the headboard. I don’t want the Savior watching me when I’m conducting such business, you understand?”

“Sounds sensible to me…”

“You’ll keep an eye out for any films of Zsa Zsa fucking? For me?”

“I certainly will…”

Zsa Zsa was Hungarian. Those Hungarian girls like to get fucked in the ass, did you know that…?

I am Laslo.

James Hofbauer said...

You are a stain upon yourself Laszlo. You should be embarrassed, yet you are probably proud, feeling clever. I feel honored and respectful to comment on this woman's blog. If you are allowed to continue contributing it is through her sheer grace. She has every right to remove you. It is my opinion that she is doing something of greater integrity. I just watched 'Trespessing Bergman', witnessing the Danish filmmaker Lars von Trier conduct himself in a shameful manner. I imagine for some there is a devilish nature bold in assuming others appreciate their abrasive humor, or self-centered pride demands from them to bludgeon with shock value. I find it intellectually immature.

Rusty said...

The anti Laslo.
Funny stuff JH. Funny stuff.

Humperdink said...

Well JH, you and I appear to be of the few who find Laslo not worth the read. After the first four letter word appeared some time ago, I now skip his comments. Coursness does not add to the culture nor my enlightenment. To each his (or her) own.

Bad Lieutenant said...

James Hofbauer said...
You are a stain upon yourself Laszlo.

Who are you? Laslo is doing a certain thing. It requires no justification or excuse, least of all yours. A man who prates of von Trier and Bergman should understand the avant garde; certainly he possesses no claims to a monopoly on aesthetic mastery.

Incidentally, like most here, Ann ADORES Laslo.

Humperdink, did you vote for Trump?

Wilbur said...

Lazlo is parody, mostly self-parody, with a political dagger inserted to boot.

I will take the time to read even a long post of his. On the other hand, I will almost never read the narcoleptic posting of song lyrics or poetry longer than a couple of lines.

Humperdink said...

BL questioned: "Humperdink, did you vote for Trump?"

Given there were only two choices in the recent election, I opted to vote against the lady who supports selling baby craniums, livers and hearts.

BL, do you talk like that to your mother? Kids and grand kids (if any)?

MadisonMan said...

I appreciated the Gabor sisters' abilities to spin gold out of not much but their own beauty and wit. As noted above, they were funny. Present-day celebritnies aren't funny.

James Hofbauer said...

I am nobody and new to this blog. Previously, I found his post funny. The casual manner of assuming graphic sexual depiction in a public forum (or the use of four letter words) is acceptable without reproach I felt should be addressed. Hopefully one willing to shock is not hyper-sensitive to criticism.

Roughcoat said...

Golden Age: Friday nights, the Jack Paar 1-hour show at 8:00 CST, with guests Zsa Zsa, Eva, Peter Ustinov, Oscar Levant, George Sandars, etc. Best bit: the guests would sit in a row in chairs and Paar will tell a joke in English to someone in the first chair, who would tell it to his/her neighbor in the second chair, but in a different language; and so on down the line. Until, at the end, the result was translated back into English; and it did not remotely resemble the original, and was hilariously incoherent. E.g: English to German to Hungarian to Russian to Czech and back to English. There was a lot of mugging, of course, and also (of course) funny-cute sexual innuendo by the Gabor sisters and, of all people, Ustinov.

It was on this show that I saw my first clip of the Beatles, fyi.

Really wonderful, funny, smart TV.

Rusty said...

Oh. Shit!
You were serious?

Now it's even funnier.

JAORE said...

" To each his (or her) own."

Were that more took this position.

Humperdink said...

JAORE said: "Were that more took this position."

Yeah, I have no issues with anyone else reading/writing this stuff. It's just not for me.

Alex said...

She was always entertaining. RIP Zsa-Zsa!

Mac McConnell said...

The Golden age, Steve Allen, Ernie Kovacs, Jack Paar, Johnny Carson.

Stoutcat said...

Ms. Gabor and her sisters were almost in the class of Alma Mahler Gropius Werfel. Almost.

James Pawlak said...

Another famous Hungarian (I think an opera singer) stated the the Hungarian slogan is< "Only too much is enough". She was loyal to that theme.

James Hofbauer said...

Another famous Hungarian entertainer was Gabor Szabo.