The criminal courthouse in Raleigh, North Carolina has a stairway and it always stunk of urine. If you commit some sort of crime in Raleigh, North Carolina, my advice to you is take the elevator.
I had a judge once who was so angry because somebody in his court room stunk. He wanted to hold them in contempt of court for smelling. But he couldn't figure out who the stinker was. He asked the bailiff to smell them all but she refused.
That judge was an ass. A liberal ass too! Once a week he would release somebody he had no business releasing. But he was ready to throw somebody in prison for stinking up his courtroom.
If you're ever in court, bring a book, and don't piss off the judge. That's my advice.
We had a guy once who was from Thailand or Singapore or some damn place where you don't want to commit a crime. He was fresh off the boat and he was terrified. I mean he was scared shitless. I think he thought we were going to chop off his hands or cane him or some damn thing.
He got probation. Everybody got probation. He's probably not terrified anymore, but man he was scared. He was looking at the judge like he was Batman. All the criminals were kinda giggling at the guy.
Remind me not to commit crimes in Singapore. Or Thailand. I should have asked him, where you from? He about pissed his pants. If he did that he'd really go to prison.
One thing I've noticed about these active shitter situations, the cops come and they're pissed and everything, but you never hear about one of these perps being killed by a choke hold.
I'm a scofflaw but I always shower before I go to court.
You know what they say about God? He thinks he's a district court judge.
That line would be funnier if they didn't have to give probation to everybody. I think they practice their scowl in the mirror, to scare the punks. I'm Batman! And then they have to give the guy probation.
I don't understand. Don't they have locks on the doors? I know I missed something in the article that told me why people are free to come and go (so to speak) in this building. It has to be a Madison thing.
People get the kind of governance they vote for so, ah...fuck 'em very much. You Dane Co./ Madsonians vote for the kind of pols that put up with this shit (literally, in this case) then boo hoo for you. Ann Arbor/Washtenaw co. courthouses have security that would make East Germany proud. Metal detectors,additional wandings, and a stern crew of Deputy Sheriffs who run the whole show. And Ann Arbor's level of nutty left-wing progressivism is just as bad as Madison's.
Bolton Hill area of Baltimore, very nice neighborhood, about 3 a.m. a pounding at the inside front door. I rolled over and called the cops without going downstairs. They showed up quickly (white privilege). I opened a front window and watched as they addressed someone inside the outside foyer. A moment later, one officer stepped out and asked if I had any toilet paper. I tossed down a roll in a couple of plastic bags. A bit later the cops make the old drunk step out and apologise. I spent the next day scrubbing marble. How did his fecal matter get head high?
"The headline writer used the passive voice either because of ignorance (who did it?) or collusion (we know who but we're not telling). Is there any other excuse?"
The headline writer is me. No quotes around the post title is your best clue.
The headline at the link is: "Mayor says changes needed at CCB to protect employees/Feces found in Madison courtroom prompts health, safety conversation."
I mean the subheadline — "Feces found in Madison courtroom prompts health, safety conversation" — might be funny in an Onion sort of way. That is, the flatness becomes the unflatness.
Or, maybe it's just another example of sloppy writing.
Like: "This person did defecate on the couch that was in the press room and they [antecedent, the person who defecated] have since had to throw away the couch."
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42 comments:
A home for the homeless. What could be more Madisonish ?
This is why you can't keep a football coach.
Madison Wisconsin is a fucking cesspool. You deserve it.
Are you sure it isn't a protest against the justice system?
Y'all got some issues there in Madison.
"This is what democracy looks like!"
The criminal courthouse in Raleigh, North Carolina has a stairway and it always stunk of urine. If you commit some sort of crime in Raleigh, North Carolina, my advice to you is take the elevator.
I had a judge once who was so angry because somebody in his court room stunk. He wanted to hold them in contempt of court for smelling. But he couldn't figure out who the stinker was. He asked the bailiff to smell them all but she refused.
That judge was an ass. A liberal ass too! Once a week he would release somebody he had no business releasing. But he was ready to throw somebody in prison for stinking up his courtroom.
If you're ever in court, bring a book, and don't piss off the judge. That's my advice.
We had a guy once who was from Thailand or Singapore or some damn place where you don't want to commit a crime. He was fresh off the boat and he was terrified. I mean he was scared shitless. I think he thought we were going to chop off his hands or cane him or some damn thing.
He got probation. Everybody got probation. He's probably not terrified anymore, but man he was scared. He was looking at the judge like he was Batman. All the criminals were kinda giggling at the guy.
Remind me not to commit crimes in Singapore. Or Thailand. I should have asked him, where you from? He about pissed his pants. If he did that he'd really go to prison.
One thing I've noticed about these active shitter situations, the cops come and they're pissed and everything, but you never hear about one of these perps being killed by a choke hold.
The source of the fecal material could be the reality denying supporters of Michael Brown, B. H. Obama and other criminals.
Hugely disappointed the homeless are vilified in the article. Wouldn't a porta-john at each level solve the problem?
This is what democracy smells like.
Does eating too much cheese cause this ? Just wondering .
I'm a scofflaw but I always shower before I go to court.
You know what they say about God? He thinks he's a district court judge.
That line would be funnier if they didn't have to give probation to everybody. I think they practice their scowl in the mirror, to scare the punks. I'm Batman! And then they have to give the guy probation.
Oh yeah?! Double probation! Double secret probation!
I read this week that Madison is considering putting in public toilets downtown. So won't that solve this problem?
I don't understand. Don't they have locks on the doors? I know I missed something in the article that told me why people are free to come and go (so to speak) in this building. It has to be a Madison thing.
1. Is this some variation on "I Can't Breathe"?
2. Alder Paul Skidmore - great name.
3. Taking a crap on a couch?
This is what selective law enforcement looks like. Victory at last!
Perhaps the Madison councilpersons should caucus in Rockford.
Toilet training is a bourgeois affectation anyway.
OWS is everywhere!
Now THAT is "speaking truth to power"!
I had nothing to do with this. Honest!
And yet some decry that there's a lack of access to the courts for these folks.
Well, they've got a DNA sample if they ever want to track the perp down.
I didn't know that garage had a court date today.
People get the kind of governance they vote for so, ah...fuck 'em very much. You Dane Co./ Madsonians vote for the kind of pols that put up with this shit (literally, in this case) then boo hoo for you. Ann Arbor/Washtenaw co. courthouses have security that would make East Germany proud. Metal detectors,additional wandings, and a stern crew of Deputy Sheriffs who run the whole show. And Ann Arbor's level of nutty left-wing progressivism is just as bad as Madison's.
Bolton Hill area of Baltimore, very nice neighborhood, about 3 a.m. a pounding at the inside front door. I rolled over and called the cops without going downstairs. They showed up quickly (white privilege). I opened a front window and watched as they addressed someone inside the outside foyer. A moment later, one officer stepped out and asked if I had any toilet paper. I tossed down a roll in a couple of plastic bags. A bit later the cops make the old drunk step out and apologise. I spent the next day scrubbing marble. How did his fecal matter get head high?
I thought you couldn't post the Ten Excrements in a Courthouse nowadays.
I am Laslo.
as judge judy is fond of saying, "this courtroom is my sandbox".
Thank You again and Molotov-jews-hilarious.
I don't have much of a view of Walker but that is just great!
The perp was just proving she was not a robot.
Hands Up, DOn't Shit!!
Well what a shitty mess.
In Madison, a municipal courthouse wall is covered in excrement.
The headline writer used the passive voice either because of ignorance (who did it?) or collusion (we know who but we're not telling).
Is there any other excuse?
If you can't say something nice...
take a shit in the courtroom. Amrite?
"The headline writer used the passive voice either because of ignorance (who did it?) or collusion (we know who but we're not telling). Is there any other excuse?"
The headline writer is me. No quotes around the post title is your best clue.
The headline at the link is: "Mayor says changes needed at CCB to protect employees/Feces found in Madison courtroom prompts health, safety conversation."
See how that's not much fun?
I mean the subheadline — "Feces found in Madison courtroom prompts health, safety conversation" — might be funny in an Onion sort of way. That is, the flatness becomes the unflatness.
Covered? The wall was COVERED in excrement?
That would take a lot of time, and a lot of shit.
Or, maybe it's just another example of sloppy writing.
Like:
"This person did defecate on the couch that was in the press room and they [antecedent, the person who defecated] have since had to throw away the couch."
"(sniffs the air) Somebody making soup?"
Creed Bratton
Saint Croix said...
If you're ever in court, bring a book, and don't piss off the judge.
I got a packed courtroom to laugh at the stupid judge ...it cost me $400.
Why is the building open after hours to allow this sort of thing to occur?
There should be no one in the building to break into offices and to defecate in offices.
What the hell? None of the reporters asks that question or says why there are people in the building after hours to be an issue.
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