December 26, 2014

At the Last-Night-in-Austin Café...

... save me a place at the table.

ADDED: The restaurant is the East Side Showroom. Highly recommended!


jimbino said...


Both Austin and Madison are marxist enclaves in otherwise conservative states. Both are state capitals and both have great universities. Austin is a more highly developed magnet for high-tech industry.

How do you compare the two cities? For housing, livability, outdoor activity, dining, partying, etc?

Michael K said...

Hey, we have good news. The GDP grew at 5% in the third quarter. The bad news ? The increased spending was on Obamacare.

Whoops !

ken in tx said...

Austin, and I suppose Madison, survive on the surplus resources produced by the rest of the state. Austin, as far as I can tell produces only government regulations, paper work, and really strange art work. If there is a local brewery, I haven't found it. I am drinking beer from Shiner and Blanco.

mesquito said...

You keep coming to Austin. Someday you'll visit Texas.

madAsHell said...

"Hey, Mom! Let's go out to dinner."

"I'd love to. Let me get my coat."

"Ummmm.....Mom, don't forget your credit card!!"

Seniors pay, and now my kids are doing it to me!!

madAsHell said...

You keep coming to Austin. Someday you'll visit Texas.

If you're going to drive to Austin, then you really need to head down I-35 to San Antonio.

That cold, dead armadillo on the side of the road?? Ya''ll need to stop, and put a Lone Star beer in his hands.

Guimo said...

Is that the X?

Lance said...

Instapudit or Juxtapundit?

Ann Althouse said...

"Seniors pay, and now my kids are doing it to me!!"

At some point, that's not how it works.

Big Mike said...

@ken, I haven't traveled to Austin in over a decade, but I recollect numerous microbreweries that were quite good. Did something happen to them?

TosaGuy said...

Passed through Austin tonight on the train to San Antonio. Looked beautiful in the dark.

Michael K said...

""Seniors pay, and now my kids are doing it to me!!"

At some point, that's not how it works."

The point where we have kicked the bucket.

madAsHell said...

At some point, that's not how it works.

I was thinking micro-economics, but you are correct in terms of macro-economics.

madAsHell said...

oh, kids are adults. They have money.

somefeller said...

Austin is just as much a part of Texas as any rural Texas town. And unlike most rural towns in Texas, people are moving to Austin. But I prefer Houston, Dallas or San Antonio anyway.

Laslo Spatula said...

Charles Manson used many of the tenets of Dale Carnegie and Scientology, things he learned in prison.

I am taking notes.

I am Laslo.

Anonymous said...

I am a conservative. I believe in doing violence to my enemies. Isn't that the purpose of an army?

I have learned recently that liberals also believe in doing violence to their enemies. Isn't that the purpose of a mob?

Laslo Spatula said...

It was a few months after that unfortunate Halloween evening when I again ran into John Travolta. I was parking cars at a fancy Los Angeles restaurant, and he pulled up in a Mercedes with what I assumed was an agent or some sort.

"I remember you!" he exclaimed, handing me his keys. "You were that dolphin!"

"Yeah, I was..."

"I STILL think of that night: oh man, what could have been..."

"Yeah, it was a nice party..."

"I'll tell you a little secret..."

"That isn't necessary..."

"I still masturbate about you in that dolphin suit..."

For a brief moment I closed my eyes and pretended I was somewhere far, far away, but John Travolta kept speaking.

"You know -- jerked off?"

"I'm familiar with what 'masturbate' means, sir..."

"You know, I can hire almost anyone in this town to wear a dolphin suit for me, but you: you were something special."

"I'm glad you remember the party fondly, sir."

"Maybe after my dinner we can get some time together, just you and me, and we can reminisce....

"Sir, I better move your car: Steve Guttenberg is behind you, and he is getting mad."

"Screw Steve Guttenberg! Steve Guttenberg is a freak! You know what that freak is into?"

"I don't need to know, sir..."

"Water sports! Golden showers! And I mean, there's not even someone dressed like a dolphin pissing on him: a dolphin pissing on you -- that's natural, you know what I mean?"

"I understand your words, Mr. Travolta..."

"There isn't even a guy dressed up like a dolphin, it's just young girls..."

"Yes sir..."

"I mean, these young girls come to Hollywood with stars in their eyes, and the next thing they know they are peeing on Steve Guttenberg in some Beverly Hills hotel room, it's wrong, you know?"

"I think so, too, sir..."

"And then he is peeing on THEM, all the while promising them that they'll be in a "Police Academy" sequel with Bobcat Goldthwait, that's fucked up..."

"That is fucked up, sir..."

Laslo Spatula said...

"You know, he tried to get people in Hollywood to call the act of having two fingers and a thumb inserted into your anus a 'Guttenberg,' can you believe that?"

"Unfortunately I can, sir..."

"Like that never happened in Hollywood before. I was doing that very thing with Gabe Kaplan's thumb way back on the set of 'Welcome Back, Kotter', but did I expect people to call it a 'Travolta'? Or a 'Barbarino', for that matter?"

"I would imagine the answer is 'no,' sir."

"You have to EARN it."

"That would seem to be fair, sir..."

"I've had Dustin Hoffman's Academy Award put up my ass, do I call that a 'Hoffman'?"

"No sir..."

"Well, I DO call it a "Hoffman", you know why?"

"Uh, I don't, sir."

"Why? Because Dustin deserves the Respect."

"Understood, sir..."

"I accepted that Oscar in my ass with HONOR."

"Seems like it would indeed be a very special moment..."

"I bet no self-respecting Oscar winner would EVER put their Oscar in Steve Guttenberg's ass. Except Ben Kingsley, maybe."

"I wouldn't have expected that, sir."

"Oh, Ben is known around Hollywood as a 'piss guy', too -- that's why he took the role in 'Gandhi'."


"You know -- Gandhi. Little Indian dude who liked to drink piss."

"Thank you for connecting those dots, sir."

"By the way: do you still have that dolphin costume?"

"No sir: I burned it."

"That's a shame. I'm sure I can get a girl on the set to make you another one."

"That really isn't necessary, sir, and Mr. Guttenberg is honking..."

"Okay, I'll head inside, but please do me a favor..."

"What would that be sir?"

"Tell the girl with Guttenberg to wear a raincoat..."

After which I quit my job on the spot: the word around the valets was that Guttenberg would talk your ear off...

I am Laslo.

Coconuss Network said...

Very very handsome gentleman.

Deb said...

Here is a good description of Texas geography.

cognito said...

Thanks for coming - we hope you spent lots of money. Glad to see you leave. Take all those Kahlifornians with you, please.

Ctmom4 said...

He looks like you. Same look in the eyes.