... which seems a little too happy... and why does it have a real tongue?
ADDED: Seems to be a rip off of The Annoying Orange:
May 25, 2014
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36 comments:
Try genitals.
War on kids!
Scares the hell out of me. Would give a kid nightmares.
The Box just might taste better than the contents.
The box reminds me of the minions from Despicable Me.
Mad Men doing the family thing about Burger Chef made me feel even more alone than usual.
I see the phenomenon pretty much the same as Don Draper's conscience manifested as Archibald Whitman: "You sell bullshit."
A minority view, apparently.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
I am a way that your parents show they love you. Now sit down, shut up and eat your child-size fries.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
Little boys, one day an eager open mouth will mean something different to you. For now enjoy your tiny hamburger.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
I don't blink. Ever. Think about that when you go to bed tonight.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
Years later you will connect the dots of your castration fear.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
The bottom of my box is anatomically correct.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
Reach inside me. Deeper. Deeper. That's it, just a little to the left. Now tickle my juice-box.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
I find it a Special Honor when divorced dads buy me for the child they see every other weekend.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
We need to have a heart-to-heart talk about where the meat of your hamburger comes from.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
I am Unconditional Love. I will love you long after mommy leaves town with the gardener.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
Devour everything I have to offer, then throw me in the trash. Little bitch.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
I like to be left alone with small children.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
I am neither male or female. Little boy, now is the time to begin questioning your sexuality.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
I won't tell anyone where you touched me: it is our secret.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
I have a toy inside. It is not a choking hazard: go ahead, put it in your mouth.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
Please take your finger out of my Arch-hole.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
I probably shouldn't tell you this, but the teenager who prepared my meal for you didn't wash his hands after using the restroom.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
It is nine in the morning and I can smell the gin on your mother's breath. I am sorry for you, little one.
I am assuming most people can see the betamax3000 tags and just skip down.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
Wow: your new step-mommy is barely older than your sister. Let's live in fast Fast Food Pretend Land a bit longer, you and I.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
It's OK: I still wet the bed too, sometimes. You might not want to eat the wet cheeseburger.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
Your Daddy smells like ashtrays and hookers; I bet you'll get a new video-game today.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
What is a hooker? It's like a Mommy that your daddy pays to visit and leaves him with Guilt and Shame. That's why Daddy did his own laundry this morning, and why Mommy was crying. Did I mention I have a Toy Surprise?
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
Sometimes Daddy loves Mommy Too Much. It'll be OK, she'll be home from the hospital soon.
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
I have seen things that would drive a person to an Existential Crisis. What is an Existential Crisis? Let me tell you about Santa Claus...
Fast Food Mascot Food Box says:
Little One, there will come a time when you outgrow me and leave me behind as a Childish Thing. It's OK: I never really die, and you eventually will, so it all works out in the end.
Clutch Cargo.
Because of budgetary limitations and the pressure to create television animation within a tight time frame, the show was the first to use the "Syncro-Vox" optical printing system. Syncro-Vox was invented by Edwin Gillette, television cameraman and partner in Cambria Studios, as a means of superimposing real human mouths on the faces of animals for the popular "talking animal" commercials of the 1950s. Clutch Cargo employed the Syncro-Vox technique by superimposing live-action human lips over limited-motion animation or even motionless animation cels.
The orange reminded me of Hillary Clinton and the NYT Magazine's "Planet Hillary" cover last January.
betamax3000 said... "I am assuming most people can see the betamax3000 tags and just skip down."
Nah, I do that with Crack's comments. Your stuff is solid gold. Usually.
If I were a McDonald's stockholder, I'd be investigating to see if anyone in the marketing department has been getting payola from Burger King.
Some days you eat the Happy Meal, and some days the Happy Meal eats you.
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