May 30, 2014

"And now, with this diploma in hand, most of you will go on to the noblest pursuits, like helping a cable company acquire a telecom company."

"You will defend BP from birds. You will spend hours arguing that the well water was contaminated well before the fracking occurred. One of you will sort out the details of my pre-nup. A dozen of you will help me with my acrimonious divorce. And one of you will fall in love in the process. I'm talking to you, Noah Feldman!"

20 comments:

Guildofcannonballs said...

Mindy is funny but wrong.

Folks doing their damn job because of real-world applications, not pie-in-the-sky totalitarian fantasy, has created a superior life (for most everyone but especially blacks in America). Folks sitting around proclaiming what and how other folks ought to feel/think/do by fiat results in over 100 million dead in one century.

Please don't "care" about things everyone is vastly ignorant about, unless your plan is the gas chamber.

Fatal conceit means 100 million dead souls.

Anonymous said...

I don't see Noah Feldman as a divorce attorney

The Crack Emcee said...

NotquiteunBuckley,

"Mindy is funny but wrong."

Then why didn't I laugh at any of it?

"Folks doing their damn job because of real-world applications, not pie-in-the-sky totalitarian fantasy, has created a superior life (for most everyone but especially blacks in America)."

Note to white people:

Please leave black happiness out of your pronouncements until we stop screaming,...

Sydney said...

What is it with these commencement speakers? Are only actors a safe bet now? Cornell's commencement speaker was that actor from The Office who played a guy who went to Cornell.

The Crack Emcee said...

I love it:

On one thread whites are complaining, because the NSA is treating them like blacks, but - on this thread - some jackass has the nerve to suggest we're living the life of Sir Walter Raleigh.

White people have NO CLUE what's going on in this country,...

The Crack Emcee said...

That won't shut them up, though,...

Illuninati said...

The Crack Emcee said:

"Please leave black happiness out of your pronouncements until we stop screaming"

Sorry Crack Emcee, no can do. You can scream all you want but it will make no difference. You might be beyond help but there are many good black people who deserve better.

My father went to Africa to work in a bush hospital because he loved black people. In the end the genocide overwhelmed everything he or anyone else was able to do but people who care are not ready to give up. Rwanda is still trying to crawl out of the ashes and hopefully they will succeed.

The Crack Emcee said...

NotquiteunBuckley,

"Folks doing their damn job because of real-world applications, not pie-in-the-sky totalitarian fantasy, has created a superior life (for most everyone but especially blacks in America)."

Whites are working, have homes and cars - take vacations - while blacks are pushing their things around in shopping carts.

That's what I see right now.

And you're celebrating what a great life you've provided us.

My GOD, you people are sick,...

HoodlumDoodlum said...

The Crack Emcee: the life of Sir Walter Raleigh? Is that one of those mashups the kids are doing these days Like, between the life of Riley and, ah, something else?

What a revolting development, indeed!

MadisonMan said...

A Master's in Boring me to Death at parties. That's a good line.

David said...

Brevity is the soul of wit.

The chick lacks soul.

Titus said...

fab, cap and gowns everywhere around here yesterday.

crimson sashes for days.

tits.

Titus said...

Noah Feldman is pretty hot though.

Wince said...

Keling was "sharing the stage with Preet Bharara, US Attoney for the Southern District of New York. We've heard what a great guy he is... Clearly Harvard wanted you to see the full range of what India could produce here."

Bharara brought the charges against Dinesh D'Souza who, like Kaling, went to Dartmouth.

White privilege.

Patrick Henry was right! said...

Crack, why should "we" provide a life for you or anybody else? Sitting around waiting for someone else to provide you with a life might be the problem, ya think? This might be the post of the year for capturing the essence of the appeal of the Democrat party to the Cracks of the world.

Known Unknown said...

How many of them will go on to star in a show that gets dismal ratings?

Æthelflæd said...

I wouldn't want to hear her give a commencement speech, but Kaling is pretty damn funny on TV.

Chris Arabia said...

25% of the Ivy League schools went with supporting cast members of The Office for commencement speakers? I think that's what I inferred but that can't be right. The Ivy League sucks (bunch of useless credential-mongering wankers). I take no pride in having an Ivy League B.A.

Æthelflæd said...

Kaling is also oddly conservative for a female comedian. She disturbed her fellow "The Office" actors with her pro-gun views.

Crunchy Frog said...

Crack was a lot less boring when he was ranting against Mormon cultists and ex-wives. Now he's become an Al Sharpton parody.