December 26, 2012
The Tuber and The Turpitude.
The Wisconsin Potato and Vegetable Growers Association invokes the moral turpitude clause in its contract with Olympian Suzy Favor Hamilton, recently outed as a prostitute.
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25 comments:
Too bad for her that the name "Suzy Chapstick" has already been taken.
Hot potato.
Would the Association have been able to invoke the same morals clause if the Hamiltons had a marital living arrangement like the couples in the last post?
Somewhere, Stu Levitan, Puritan, is nodding in agreement.
She is no longer outstanding in her field.
I can't manage to get interested in this story at all. I guess I like my secret-life-of-prostitution stories to feature women who are actually desirable.
As Kevin should know, each man has a different definition of "desireable". And it may change as he ages.
Think of what she could do with a nice big cucumber. Or two cucumbers, I sorta guess that Suzy is into the "double penetration" scene.
Peter
Thats too bad for them.
It's a real missed opportunity for them to up the status of potatoes.
Why should peaches, and cherries have all the fun?
She's is a hot potater she's a red hot radiater.
"When they see her coming, all dem wenches take a chill,
Diamonds glist'nin' all around and style enough to kill,
Her steady feller broke a crap game, Down in Louisville,
And buys her chicken ev'ry day for lunch.
"Come Seben!" Dreamy eyes that sparkle
and she rolls them mighty cute,
Colored gemmen say that lady cert'ny is a "beaut,"
"Go broke," dat she's a hot potater She's a red hot radiator,
She's the warmest baby in the bunch."
Yankee Doodle Dandy
She still has more class than being a Potato Grower Queen.
But she may have to raise her rates.
That's it - I'm off potatoes.
Are you people even aware of just how debased potatoes are? i don't think you are.
They grow in the DIRT, people! THE FILTHY DIRT!!!
You have to think outside the box. I'm sure that Suzy could become an eloquent spokesperson for many types of tubers....At any rate, I congratulate her on creating an interesting scandal. So many sex scandals nowadays lack prurience. A sex scandal which lacks prurience defeats the whole idea of sex scandals.
Ms Hamilton's Defense:
"I yam what I yam."
"I yam what I yam" = WIN!!!!!
Yes, there is less dirt surrounding the trashy Olympian than the average potato is happy being in - most it's poor short life.
She lost her spuds for splooge.
LarsPorsena said...
She lost her spuds for splooge.
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You call it splooge, she called it the ointment that leads to money.
This is probably the least of her worries. Right about now I imagine the Treasury Department is looking at the books of the Favor Hamilton Real Estate Agency for evidence of money laundering from her financial transactions on the side.
On her back. There, fixed it myself.
You reap what you sow.
Crimes of moral terpitude will get an alien deported.
What about tax evasion?
That scary shoe ad from 2000 could be updated to feature an IRS agent chasing her through the woods instead on hockey mask chain saw man.
I predict a comeback as spokesperson for the Turnip Growers Association.
New slogan: Turniptude, the Immoral Fiber.
The zucchini and cucumber growers are saying, 'Hey, wait a sec...'
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