November 25, 2010
Food writers hate Thanksgiving because they have to write once again about basically the same meal.
Hey. I see what you did there. You had to write about Thanksgiving again, so you wrote about hating to have to write about Thanksgiving again. What will you do next year? Write about writing about having to write about Thanksgiving again? You're not going to be able to keep up that meta game.
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Seasoned Greetings to Althouse the Althousians, and the Meadhoosier
Maybe they should just take a closer look?
Hey look! I'm writing about you writing about writers writing about not liking writing about what they already wrote about. And I might do it again too.
They could at least use a little imagination.
Chop up the turkey into logical pieces. Roast all the pieces according to type, removing the liver first, then the breast, then the legs, thighs etc., so that it is all cooked perfectly. Include the neck, gizzard, liver, and whatever comes in that little package inside the cavity.
Arrange on a large serving platter in the shape of the United States. Use a map for reference. Be sure to include Alaska and Hawaii. Use roasted vegetables for Canada and Mexico and for ocean. Pour gravy in the spaces for the great lakes. Use mashed potatoes for mountains, if you must. Then stick tiny paper flags on toothpicks throughout the turkey-map to indicate where you imagine nationalities are concentrated. Include corporations, and NGO logos.
Next year they can write about what happens at Thanksgiving dinner.
Or what happens after Thanksgiving.
They're never going to read this, are they?
Sports writers hate the World Series. Same damn thing every year, two teams playing for the championship.
I always hated writing and editing weather news stories the most. I mean, what the hell is there to say, really? And all the inevitable cliches made me very cranky.
I'd far rather write about Thanksgiving every year or, better yet, get someone like Chip Ahoy to do it.
While I'm here, Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!
Hi, reader!
Actually, (and the Lefties on Slate should be into all things alternative, anyway) where is it cast in stone you must have turkey?
If memory serves, the Pilgrims didn't have turkey; they had fish, oysters, stuff like that (where did you think all those 14 child families came from?). So do an article on alternative fare.
"Actually, (and the Lefties on Slate should be into all things alternative, anyway) where is it cast in stone you must have turkey?"
How many food writers do you think have exploited "that* theme over the years?
I haven't ever written about food preparation, except encoignure loaf and Thai elephant.
So it's pretty much an open field for me.
Food writers can push brining turkeys. It makes a world of difference in texture and moistness. But, you have to plan ahead which Americans hate to do.
Fod writers are intoxicated by novelty, rather than by perfection of and celebration of, food and beverage traditions.
So Guatemalan-Ethiopian fusion cuisine is "sexy" while a superb mince pie or stuffing - isn't.
Other nations BRAG that certain national dishes and beverages and food&beverage ceremonies date back to before they had maps or even knew who different peoples were, let alone what they ate. And they then and still now spend time perfecting their tea ceremonies and national dishes.
We could do well to heed them. While acknowledging that we should find and use new techniques and food ingredients and so on.
I, as a side matter...note that the fastest spread of any food item was the chile pepper. Every culture picked it up, though it was long resisted by N Europeans.
Thanksgiving should be their excuse to take a day off from writing about food. Maybe shake things up by writing about the table decor? Or holiday color schemes? Color schemes bring out the beast in me. Anything is better than those writers who write about their families. How trite and uninspiring!
And pity the poor sports writers. They have to keep writing about essentially the same damn game over and over and over.
Maybe if they kept score for Thanksgiving dinners, some interest could be ginned up.
ndspinelli: "Food writers can push brining turkeys. It makes a world of difference in texture and moistness. But, you have to plan ahead which Americans hate to do."
Or you can buy a kosher, or "enhanced", bird, which are essentially pre-brined.
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