October 24, 2009

It's the Cancer Awareness Light-Up Pen.


The fine print says:
A portion of your purchase will be made to various cancer support programs throughout the united states whose mission is to provide the ongoing research and education it takes to find a cure. Thanks for your support!
And thanks for your spurious failure to capitalize "United States." It helps us not trust you. I don't know what you think you're saying you're going to do with "a portion of [my] purchase," but I'm here to say that if I buy that awful pink fuzzball, I will be taking my entire purchase with me.

"Early Detection Saves Lives" and "Lights As You Write" — nice capitalization. Too bad it doesn't light up when you have breast cancer.


Florida said...

Time Magazine reports breast cancer awareness, screening and early detection have no effect on outcomes.

These tests do, however, harm patients.

But let's continue with "awareness" campaigns even in light of their damaging results.


Bissage said...

Mrs. Bissage had a lumpectomy, and they gave her one of those “Ribbon Writer” pens to sign the informed consent release, so the room was absolutely brimming with positive vibrations and I couldn’t have possibly felt better about the situation, legal beagle that I am.

jeff said...

"In the United States in 2005, all cardiovascular diseases combined claimed the lives of
454,613 females while all forms of cancer combined to kill 268,890 females. Breast cancer
claimed the lives of 41,116 females; lung cancer claimed 69,105."

What color is the ribbon for women heart disease?

rhhardin said...

If 2008 is any guide, they'll be half off next week.

Triangle Man said...

What color is the ribbon for women heart disease?

The logo is a red dress. Seriously.

Lucius said...

Reminds me of the Ben & Jerry's Peace Pops, where a portion of the price was donated to "world peacee".

I had lots of fun asking a few overly self-satisfied people about the logistics of that.