December 17, 2025

"When I see my own ex at a party, I clam up. Go in on myself like a jump-started pangolin."

Writes Simon Mills, in "I know how Madonna and Guy Ritchie must have felt in that room/Reunited after 17 years for their son Rocco’s exhibition, the former It couple made a good show of civility. So why can’t everyone else do the same?" (London Times).

He's simultaneously like a mollusk and a scaly anteater, but we see what he means. 
I have actually discreetly exited several events when spying her across the room. If I know in advance that she will be attending something, I tend to avoid it altogether. It’s stupid, ridiculous, teenage behaviour — I am 61! Divorced for almost 13 years!... I can’t deal with the unnerving strangeness of not knowing someone I once knew so well.... A festering, debilitating, emotionally ruinous sense of shame remains, blighting progress and preventing sleep....

I sent a link to this article to my son Chris, and he texted: "At first I thought it was gonna be about them having to pretend their son is a great painter." 

36 comments:

Peachy said...

"Rocco Ritchie’s art is a clumsy pastiche of Francis Bacon"

pastiche - I need to use that word more. Reminds me of pistachio. which reminds be of Dubai style chocolates.
which reminds me of chocolate. damn.

Rocco said...

Peachy, don’t forget the bacon, too.

Iman said...

Like a sturgeon…

Peachy said...

Bacon. You know - not a big fan. strangely.

Humperdink said...

After 37 years my ex still refuses to talk to me unless she absolutely forced to do so. A bitter woman and she’s the one who left. So childish. At the time, my pastor told me to be cordial. I have followed that advice.

rehajm said...

I love pangolins. I so wanted to see one in the wild. I visited the preserve where there was a pangolin studies camp but didn’t rearrange my schedule to do the overnighter to visit them. One of life’s big regrets…

Known Unknown said...

You would think after seventeen years it would be fairly old hat.

rehajm said...

I’m also a big fan of the Irish exit…

Aggie said...

..."At first I thought it was gonna be about them having to pretend their son is a great painter." ...

How could it possibly be about their son, when it's All About Them?

n.n said...

Ex-actly.

FullMoon said...

Follow the link, son has that unhappy Nick Reiner look...

n.n said...

Eggs-ellent advice.

n.n said...

Beware the unPlanned "burden" entertaining abortive ideation.

NKP said...

What happened to “Get over it?”

We were a family for 18 years. I see her every couple years at events involving kids or grandkids. Stay under the same roof for a few days - enjoy catching-up. We might even be “friends” on Facebook? We let each other down in big ways (she DID hit me first!). We always kinda liked each other but it wasn’t enough. Life without forgiveness isn’t much of a life.

Bitch did take me for over a $million, though.

narciso said...

I like his film the least said of madonnas eldritch shape

Peachy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
narciso said...

Its the London Times exoect them to get it wrong

Peachy said...

Pangolins in China were slaughtered for the big lie.

tim maguire said...

Now I can’t hear the word “pangolin” without thinking of Jon Stewart. https://youtu.be/sSfejgwbDQ8?si=_bYtPaZ6yYgRm2DO

narciso said...

Man from uncle ministry and operation fortune are my top three

narciso said...

Auditions for the bond milieu

BarrySanders20 said...

"That's funny," Madonna said when told of Richie's comments. "I hardly think about him at all."

narciso said...

Thats how we feel about madonna

Laslo Spatula said...

He was caught off-guard. He thought he was being introduced to an unfortunate elderly plastic-surgery victim that looked vaguely frog-like, when it turns out that it is his ex.

Time goes by.

I am Laslo.

narciso said...

Mistakes were made

Bob Boyd said...

If a pangolin won’t start, do not connect it to your vehicle’s battery or electrical system.
Try a kick start. If it remains unresponsive, just leave it. It has probably joined the choir invisible and will never start, no matter what.

Bob Boyd said...

The Norwegian Blue pangolin is known to play dead.

William50 said...

Laslo,
+1

narciso said...

Depends on the voltage

narciso said...

It might go voom

Rosalyn C. said...

Madonna looks like the attention is all about her, but in fairness that's true.

john mosby said...

Jump-Started Pangolins were a great band. I saw them at the Cantab Lounge. CC, JSM

Josephbleau said...

“ Depends on the voltage”

But what’s the frequency, Kenneth?

mccullough said...

The Pangolin, a Marianne Moore poem, delights.

Marcus Bressler said...

My 12-Step, spiritually-based program taught me how to forgive. I have forgiven all three of my ex's. With the exception of my surviving daughter's mother, I refuse to have anything to do with them.

Tom T. said...

Mercifully, my first wife and I are on different coasts, so we never run the risk of attending the same event.

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