Here's the inspiration (and note the straws!):
February 7, 2025
I want a song parody that uses the phrases "Big Balls" and "plastic straws" — maybe to the tune of "Popsicles and Icicles."
Try to include a lot of the Trump-related items that are bouncing around the internet today. I can't blog all these things. There are too many. And it's too absurd. I've already asked A.I., but it just doesn't know how to make it interesting and funny.
Posts
19 comments:
How about Pictures of Matchstick Men instead?
When I look up to the sky
I see the DOGE, a funny kind of yellow
I rush home to bed, I soak my head
I see the DOGE underneath my pillow
I wake next morning, tired, still yawning
See the DOGE come peeping through my window
Big balls and plastic straws and DOGE
Big balls and plastic straws and DOGE
All I ever see is them and DOGE
Windows echo Musk's reflection
When I look in their direction now
When will this haunting stop?
The DOGE, it just won't leave me alone
Big balls and plastic straws and DOGE
Big balls and plastic straws and DOGE
All I ever see is them and DOGE
DOGE in the sky, DOGE with this guy
DOGE makes men cry, DOGE lies
DOGE in the sky, DOGE with this guy
DOGE make men cry, DOGE lies
Big balls and plastic straws and
Big balls and plastic straws and DOGE
Big balls and plastic straws
Big balls and plastic straws
Definitely upsetting the Status Quo, heheheheh....
JSM
HA! AI doesn't know how to make it interesting and funny.
Whenever someone tries to list the occupations that won't be obliterated by AI, they leave out standup comics. Likely because there are relatively few of us. It's a tricky business, making a roomful of strangers laugh, often despite themselves. Some equate it to magic or sorcery. One thing is becoming clear, however: AI won't be replacing us any time soon.
Big balls and real straws
Super Bowl and girls-only sports
These are a few of the things he loves
He loves blue eyes and brown eyes
But not wind mussing up his hair
These are a part of the Trump we love
[Bridge]
If you put them all together
Much to your surprise (Oh, tell me what)
You'll find a bit of Elon
Right before your eyes
Big stars and under-pars
And mean tweets all through the night
These are a few of the things we love
May be silly but still he is
Just what we dream about
Yes, he's the Trump that we love
Y-M-C-A dancing…
Y-M-C-A dancing…
Y-M-C-A dancing…
Pop tariffs, ICE sheriffs, big balls and paper straws
These are a few of the things that he loves
He loves sprockets and rockets
And DOGE blowin' up the news
These are a part of the Trump I know
If you put them all together
Much to your surprise (oh tell me what)
You'll find a bit of humor
Right before your eyes
Dem stars in scars and
News dumps on Friday night
These are a few of the things we saw
Silly but still he is
Just what I dreamed he do
Yes, he's the Trump that I know
If you put them all together
And comb through all the lies (oh tell me what)
You'll find a ton of gritting
USAID before our eyes
Dem stars in scars and
News dumps on Friday night
These are a few of the things we saw
Silly but still he is
Just what I dreamed he do
Yes, he's the Trump I knew
Pop tariffs, ICE sheriffs
Drop tariffs, ICE sheriffs, hmmm
Try to set it to My Favorite Things. Usually worked for Mad Magazine.
And not a parody, but there is this little ditty by AC/DC
"Big Balls"
Well I'm rather upper class high society
God's gift to ballroom notoriety
And I always fill my ballroom
The event is never small
The social pages say I've got
The biggest balls of all
I've got big balls
I've got big balls
They're such big balls
And they're dirty big balls
And he's got big balls
And she's got big balls
(But we've got the biggest balls of them all)
And my balls are always bouncing
My ballroom always full
And everybody comes and comes again
If your name is on the guest list
No one can take you higher
Everybody says I've got
Great balls of fire
I've got big balls
Oh, I've got big balls
'N' they're such big balls
Dirty big balls
And he's got big balls
And she's got big balls
(But we've got the biggest balls of them all)
Some balls are held for charity
And some for fancy dress
But when they're held for pleasure
They're the balls that I like best
My balls are always bouncing
To the left and to the right
It's my belief that my big balls
Should be held every night
We've got big balls
We've got big balls
We've got big balls
Dirty big balls
He's got big balls
She's got big balls
(But we've got the biggest balls of them all)
(We've got big balls
We've got big balls)
And I'm just itching to tell you about them
Oh we had such wonderful fun
Seafood cocktail, crabs, crayfish
(But we've got the biggest balls of them all)
(Bollocks Knackers)
(Bollocks Knackers)
(Bollocks Knackers)
(Bollocks Knackers)
To the tune of My Favorite Things.
Banning the straws and requiring biomass
Banning the stoves, wood burning or gas
New regulations tied up with strings
With dollars, not a few, are my favorite things
When the DOGE bites, when 47's wrecking ball swings
When I'm feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel so bad
"Try to include a lot of the Trump-related items that are bouncing around the internet today."
Nah. Too much like a homework assignment. I come here so I don't have to spend much time on the rest of the internet.
Why not “The Immigrant Song”, Led Zep?
Plastic straws, ah!
Plastic straws, ah!
We come from the land of the ice and snow
From the midnight sun where the BIG BALLS grow
The hammer of the gods
We write the code that disbands
To fight deep state, they whine and cry
Pelosi, we are coming
On we sweep with threshing sword
Our only goal a land we can afford
Trump's Motley Crue - Balls, balls, balls
Friday night and I need a fight
Newsome's coming, needs some federal might
Hot EO pen in my hand feels right
But what I need to make the deficit tight are those
Balls, balls, balls
No more Politico subscripts
Balls, balls, balls
No more transexual comic strips
Balls, balls, balls
ALL CAPS POSTS from my fingertips
To the tune of Incense and Peppemints
Tried it with "Big Balls in Cowtown" by Asleep at the Wheel but I have to work on my taxes. Dang
1950's humor....Why are they called cheap hotel pants?...No ball room! Bada Bing
Iman, your Zep adaptation is great! I am hearing it in my head done by Dread Zeppelin.
JSM
Laslo would have killed this!
Michael, OK, here's Big Balls and Plastic Straws by (Plastic) Strawberry Alarm Clock:
Woke skies, DEI, cripplin' mankind
Dead whites, many sights I can't define
Intersections, perplexions clutter your mind
Big balls and plastic straws, the color of time
Who cares what games we choose
Little to win, but nothing to lose
Big balls and plastic straws, meaningless nouns
Turn on, tune in, send the DOGE around
Look at the Treas, look at the Treas, yeah, girl
Look at the Treas, look at the Treas, yeah, girl, yeah, yeah
To divide the national debt in two
Throw your Pride Flag aside, it's the least you can do
Chick dicks and politics, nothin' is new
A yardstick for lunatics, one point of view
Who cares what games we choose
Little to win, but nothing to lose
Woke skies, DEI, cripplin' mankind
Dead whites, many sights I can't define
Intersections, perplexions clutter your mind
Big balls and plastic straws, the color of time
Who cares what games we choose
Little to win, but nothing to lose
Big balls, plastic straws
Big balls, plastic straws
JSM
I'm thinking something could be done with that Bad Boys Bad Boys What You Gonna Do When They Come For You tune from the Cops tv show. Seems appropriate!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v4AUyLU0WGo
Sendak/King, Really Rosie, Autocrats All Around:
(A) autocrats all around
(B) big balls
(C) compensating Caucasians
(D) DOGE domination
(E) energizing elephants
(F) fucking the fuckers
(G) Greenland and Gitmo
(H) harassing hierarchs
(I) impounding illegals
(J) justice jubilee
(K) Kennedy Krushing
(L) liquidating liberals
(M) Musk-y MAGA
(N) never napping [Sendak's original lyric, but it fits!]
(O) omitting oatmeal
(P) plastic straws
(Q) quarter pounders
(R) riling RINOs
(S) strategic shock and awe
(T) trumpy trumping
(U) universe turned upside down
(V) viva vivek
(W) whupping wankers
(X) x-ing x's [also an original Sendak lyric that fits!]
(Y) yummy yummy
(Z) zealous zapping (zealous zapping)
A, Autocrats all around
Autocrats all around (Autocrats all around)
Autocrats all around
Autocrats all around (Autocrats all around)
Autocrats all around
JSM
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