April 4, 2017

"A man was found dead Monday morning after apparently falling through the roof vent of a women’s bathroom at the Colorado State Fairgrounds in Pueblo."

According to The Denver Post, the sheriff's office said: "No foul play is suspected."

Also in The Denver Post: "A 42-year-old man choked to death early Sunday at Voodoo Doughnut on East Colfax Avenue in Denver."
KUSA-Channel 9 reported that witnesses say [Travis] Malouff was doing a doughnut challenge before he died — trying to eat a half-pound doughnut in 80 seconds or less.

29 comments:

tim in vermont said...

It sucks to be a man sometimes, always repressing a drive instilled by millions of years of evolution.

Still, you can get free porno on your phone any time you need it. Get a grip!

Ignorance is Bliss said...

If ze is dead, why assume ze is a man? Since ze was found in the women's bathroom, aren't we required to assume that ze was a woman?

tim in vermont said...

Imagine if Labradors lived in a world full of rolling tennis balls, but were not allowed to fetch!

MisterBuddwing said...

And, of course, there is the tragic story of a Connecticut college student who'd lost her father on 9/11, dying after choking on pancakes during some charity event:

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/conn-college-student-dies-days-pancake-eating-contest-article-1.3017376

CJinPA said...

I hate eating contests.

I try not to hate things that don't affect me and other people seem to enjoy. But I think if we held a anonymous national survey, 100 percent of Americans would say they hate eating contests, but were afraid to admit it. And the contestants would be relieved to be freed from their nightmare, like poor Bill Dauterive.

CJinPA said...

And, of course, there is the tragic story of a Connecticut college student who'd lost her father on 9/11, dying after choking on pancakes during some charity event:

Won't click on that. Her poor mother.

AprilApple said...

The American dream. Eating crappy donuts until you choke. Now that's going out in a blaze of glory.

CJinPA said...

Imagine if Labradors lived in a world full of rolling tennis balls, but were not allowed to fetch!

I generally agree, but the bathroom peepers have more going on than evolution. Something's askew.

madAsHell said...

What? There is no hold-my-beer-watch-this tag?

alan markus said...

If it took until Monday morning for the guy to be found by a maintenance worker, I wonder if he was really a peeper. If there were women in the bathroom at the time you would think he might have been found sooner.

mockturtle said...

Wait for both families of these 'victims' to bring lawsuits.

Fernandinande said...

I'll give you my donuts when you pry them from my cold, dead mouth after I fall thru a roof vent.

William said...

It is fitting and sweet to die for one's doughnut. If men who did not eat doughnuts lived forever, then I would not eat doughnuts, but mortality is our common fate so bring on the doughnuts. Once more, dear gourmands, into the doughnut shop......With proper merchandising extreme doughnut eating can become a heroic act. It's an easier sell than penis amputations.

Martin said...

Looks like Florida Man may have competition from Denver Man.

dhagood said...

one's perspective inevitably shapes one's outlook. while i never met him, travis malouff was a friend of many friends of mine. my friends are unanimously horror struck and heartbroken, and i have not heard any mildly snide comments about travis' death from them.

EDH said...

Ignorance is Bliss wins the thread. Boom.

robinintn said...

What a waste when the guy could just have strolled openly into the ladies' room. He's unlikely to have been challenged, but if he had been, a simple statement the he is currently identifying as a woman, accompanied by the requisite outrage, would have sufficed.

walter said...

tim in vermont said...
It sucks to be a man sometimes, always repressing a drive instilled by millions of years of evolution.
--
Yes..the siren call of the doughnut strokes us at primal level.

gadfly said...

Today's winner!

@Ignorance is Bliss said...

If ze is dead, why assume ze is a man? Since ze was found in the women's bathroom, aren't we required to assume that ze was a woman?

MaxedOutMama said...

The bathroom-breaking-bad incident is one of those things that one doesn't want to comment on. On the one hand, there's the "don't speak ill of the dead" thing. On the other hand, certain things leap to the lips and have to be strangled by the superego.

Mine is currently exhausted, but still holding firm, although it finds it allowable to mention that there's no proof that this guy was focused on the bathroom - he might have been one of these people that runs around leaping from one building to the next, and just been practicing. I think it's called parkour or free running. This is probably a more likely explanation than the other. My superego is insisting, given the context, that I should only mention that it is a very dangerous activity, and no reader of this blog should try it.

Is this even a fair post on a blog that focuses on comments? Really? What kind of comment could be made that it really worthy of this blog?

Choking on food is supposedly the fourth leading cause of death by accidental injury. Over 5,000 people died this way in 2015. While very sad, it's not generally disreputable and not generally because of greed. Peace to both of the deceaseds, and condolences to their families/friends.

I'll go lie on the floor now to recover from my superego's mighty effort. My tongue feels numb due to the conflicts in the neurological circuits. I think one blew.

The Cracker Emcee said...

Gluttony, Lust, and my favorite, though unheralded, Deadly Sin, Fucking Stupidity.

walter said...

I bet the doughnut story came up when Ann was researching Michael Moore.

walter said...

(Though Moore is likely impervious due to his pelican technique)

Clyde said...

This seems appropriate. You can add a chorus about falling through the roof vent of a women's bathroom and about choking to death on a doughnut.

Dumb Ways To Die

southcentralpa said...

Sorry, I've been back through two pages of entries without hitting a "cafe", so I'll say this follows your 'death' tag on this one.

Watched Independent Lens from last night. It was "Newtown", about the families from Sandy Hook ES. Having lost a child (albeit not to homicide), I wonder how many parents who kill their own children come to feel the same way as those families. And have only to look in the mirror to see the killer...

Jim Gust said...

I believe the girl with the pancakes had a food allergy. She didn't choke, she went into shock. So I was told.

walter said...

Eating contest with food you're allergic to? Sounds like suicide. Sometimes the ole "this has to get worse before it gets better" doesn't pan out.

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