May 9, 2014

Bill Clinton is planning to perform a public apology to Monica Lewinsky.

So they say! The idea would be (obviously) to help Hillary.

What exactly should he say, do you think?

IN THE COMMENTS: Biff said:
If true, we have clear confirmation of the genesis of Monica's recent re-emergence.

If true, we are witnessing a meticulously planned media campaign.

If true, I am greatly distressed that the most talented people in the business of media campaigns believe that this strategy is appropriate and will be effective.

I am even more disturbed to realize that they may be correct.

47 comments:

cassandra lite said...

"I'm sorry, Monnie, that I called you a stalker and lied about our relationship, and I'm sorry that I told Hillary that this was a vast right-wing conspiracy and there was no truth to it; and I'm sorry for all those women I set the state troopers on, and for all those I told to put ice on it. Oh, and I'm sorry we haven't seen each other since Hillary was on the road all the time as sec state. I miss you. Come on by. We'll put some ice on it."

Quaestor said...

Obviously? If something is proclaimed obvious, it is, I suppose.

Biff said...

If true, we have clear confirmation of the genesis of Monica's recent re-emergence.

If true, we are witnessing a meticulously planned media campaign.

If true, I am greatly distressed that the most talented people in the business of media campaigns believe that this strategy is appropriate and will be effective.

I am even more disturbed to realize that they may be correct.

Richard Dolan said...

What difference at this point does it make?

Note the snarky why the statement is phrased: Clinton "is planning to perform a public apology to" her. Is that something he will use a cigar to perform? Does it depend on the meaning of 'is'? Whatever, one thing is sure -- it will be a performance. Don't believe that it will help Hillary!, who has nothing to gain by rehashing her own performance during that entire sordid affair.

Curious George said...

"Sorry it wasn't a Cuban"

Curious George said...

"Forget the cigar baby...Billy boy is gonna show you why they call me the first black president"

Jim Killian said...

Dear Monica, Paula,Gennifer, et al...

richard mcenroe said...

Is he going to apologize to those child whores on his Caribbean jaunts too? Just curious.

Roost on the Moon said...

He should sneak in a Benghazi acrostic.

richard mcenroe said...

Will he be apologizing to Kathleen Willet, too?

Barry Dauphin said...

"Dear Monica, I'm sorry that I inadvertently ruined Tina Brown's life-- fondly, WJC."

Biff said...

Sorry. I did not answer Ann's question. Were I Bill Clinton, and I believed that some sort of apology were necessary in 2014, I would say something like:

"Protecting the rights of women, especially in the workplace, is one of the most important issues facing the nation, and, with a daughter of our own, Hilary and I believe that ensuring safe, fair, and rewarding workplaces for all women is an obligation. The greatest mistake in my life was not living up to the standard that Hil and I believe in with all our hearts. I am deeply sorry for the damage and pain I caused Ms. Lewinsky to experience, and I apologize to the American people for the poor example I set in the workplace. I am incredibly thankful for how Hilary and Chelsea stood by me, even though I caused them so much pain. I am a better man today, because of them. I hope that all Americans will join me and Hilary as we set out to improve conditions for women at home, in the workplace, across the nation, and around the world."

Real American said...

apologize for what? we were told over and over again that Clinton didn't really do anything wrong and that a blow job isn't really sex. what a load of shit. That whore isn't the one deserving of an apology. America deserves an apology. Ken Starr deserves an apology. The House managers deserve an apology.

He's not gonna mean it anyway, and it's not gonna matter because it's all fake.

Meade said...

I apologize for letting you, in my moment of weakness, seduce me. And I'm sorry that it led Hillary to calling you a "narcissistic loony toon."

As you know, I had been brought low by the then recent deaths of my mother, Hillary's father and our close friend Vince Foster, as well as by political attacks from Republicans. I'm sorry for Republicans being, you know, Republicans. I don't know why there even has to be Republicans.

A psychologist Hillary talked to suggested that the roots of my infidelity lay in my childhood, particularly the struggle between my mother and my grandmother over who would have the privilege of raising me. Obviously, I won the struggle.

I regret that Rand Paul has accused me of using my position of authority to take advantage of young women in the workplace. None of them were that young.

You, I, and Hillary all know that my (consensual) affair with you was not a power relationship and was not sex within any real meaning (standup, liedown, oral, etc.) of the term. So, sorry — you'll have to get over it.

Anyway, sorry. Or, you know, whatever.

Drago said...

cassandra, you left out how in 1997, just a few days after Paula Jones refused a settlement from billy boy, she and her husband were notified they would be audited.

With an income of $37,000, it's no wonder the IRS wanted to plumb the depths of that "fortune" for irregularities.

Matthew Sablan said...

"I'm sorry for all that stuff about how you were an erupting slut."

Iapetus said...

I'd say he owes a private apology to Lewinsky and a public apology to America. Whether she forgives him is no concern of mine, but no apology he offers the nation will ever be good enough for me. In any case, in this staged public debasement, will he assume the position on his hands and knees like Miss Lewinsky? That might be interesting theater.

Matthew Sablan said...

Bimbo eruption, slut eruption, at this point, what difference does it make?

Original Mike said...

"What exactly should he say, do you think?"

Would 50 bucks cover the dress?

Connie said...

"Sorry I ruined your pretty dress."

HG said...

They just neveer go away do they ?..i shudder at what to expect from BHO and the Missus when they leave office at a similarly young age...him having nothing but ( so called ) esteem and her having ambition...

Patrick said...

May he could apologize to all the interns that didn't blo him and didn't get recommended for jobs by him and his pals.

Bob Boyd said...

"I'm sorry my putting my dick in your mouth was so widely misconstrued.
You're a wonderful woman and any man would be lucky to have you, that I can say!
Have you met my almost son in law Anthony?"

Ron said...

When Roger on MadMen had a heart attack they brought in his recently-broken-up-with girlfriend Joan to give him some makeup before meeting a client. In this heartfelt moment he wanted her to know she was "the greatest piece of ass I've ever had...I'm so grateful I had a chance to roam those hillsides."

Bill should say something romantic like that!

Wilbur said...

I'd like to see them get back together. They made a cute couple, don't you think?

Wilbur said...

"I'd like to apologize to the American people, for exposing this nation to danger by exposing myself to blackmail. And now, I'd like to get back to work for the American people"

Illuninati said...

What a nasty hypocrite.

If Bill Clinton were sincerely sorry he would apologize to Kathleen Willey and Paula Jones and all the other Bimbos he and his wife have ruined as well.

madAsHell said...

If Mr. Clinton apologizes to Ms. Lewinsky, then will he apologize to the other "bimbo eruptions"? Will he confess to raping Juanita Broderick?

I'm not sure he wants to step on that slippery slope.

mccullough said...

Maybe Hillary's campaign can put it on Pay-Per-View and raise some cash. Make it an undercard on the next Pacquiao fight

n.n said...

Either Monica or Hillary will run on the battered mistress or wife platform, respectively. This is an extension of the "war on women" meme, and Bill is the sacrificial lamb. A variation of this strategy vaulted Barack from obscurity to reigning "king".

grackle said...

I'll believe it when I see it. But if it were to actually happen would it be an apology apology? Or just a mere apology ...

Kirk Parker said...

Apology?

Ho hum.


Apology plus seppuku? That might get some attention...

David said...

What should he say?

"I'm talking to a girl. I'm trying to have sex with her."

which means . . .

"IF I'm talking to a girl, I'm trying to have sex with her."

David said...

What will he apologize for?

1. Using his power to have sex with her?
2. Throwing away the tie he gave her?
3. Coming on her dress?
4. Not getting her that cushy job in NY he promised?
5. Trying to trash her to save his own ass?
6. Forgetting to drop off the dry cleaning?
7. Never calling?
8. Moaning "Oh Hillary" at just the wrong moment?

Phil B said...

There is a God, and He wants us to be happy. The Twitter mockery possibilities are are, well, INFINITE! Rev up those hashtags!!!

Bob Boyd said...

How about

I definitely crossed a line, no doubt about it, but at least I didn't tell her not to hang out with black people......just sayin'....

somefeller said...

If Bill apologizes, we'll be treated to the spectacle of right-wingers shouting "not enough!", "remember [something]!" and "what about [someone]?" with foaming at the mouth aplenty. One can see the beginnings of it here.

So to that I say, please apologize, Bill. Just give me some time to warm up the popcorn.

Fen said...

Clinton: "I am sorry that my actions created the need for the feminist movement to disgrace and discredit itself."

Fen said...

somefeller: If Bill apologizes, we'll be treated to the spectacle of right-wingers shouting "not enough!", "remember [something]!" and "what about [someone]?" with foaming at the mouth aplenty.

Huh? The only reason he is "apologizing" is to make Hillary politically viable. Most people aren't as stupid as you.

Smilin' Jack said...

What exactly should he say, do you think?

"I'm sorry you didn't swallow like I asked you to. Would have made life so much simpler for both of us."

Johanna Lapp said...

Boy, Rand Paul really screwed the pooch when he brought up the Clintoons' war on women last year.

Embarrassed himself and his party, and clearly proved that raking up old muck about the Teflon duo would never get any traction.

NOW will he stop these ineffective sewer-diving expeditions?

Fritz said...

"I'm sorry you didn't swallow."

Humperdink said...

Somefeller said: If Bill apologizes, we'll be treated to the spectacle of right-wingers shouting "not enough!", "remember [something]!" and "what about [someone]?"

This comment caused me to laugh out loud. You are exactly right Somefeller. Especially the "what about [someone]?" part. Bill Clinton's little black book rivals the New York city phone book.

Tank said...

A private apology MIGHT be a real apology. A public apology will be theatre.

How does it go? Monica, I'm sorry I sent my vicious wife and her nuts and sluts department after you. How does this help Hillary? What am I missing?

Fen said...

So who is going to be on the Nuts & Sluts brigade if Hillary wins? Can't have old Bill running amok with the staff unsupervised.

Rusty said...


"Bill Clinton is planning to perform a public apology to Monica Lewinsky."


Now is the time for; "What difference, at this point, does it make."

America's Politico said...

Because of my prediction for Hillary!, I was invited to the Off-The-Records bar for a pow-wow with the HRC Brain Trust on Friday at 10 PM.

It was a blast.

Here are the facts:
- Phillipe and Huma are running the show for HRC publicity. They have first 100-days of the book coming out already planned.
- NYT will ratchet up the reviews. Already Collins is the know of the status for a favorable op-ed.
- Many journos are in the bag, so to say.
- The question P&H and others thinking is not about 2016, in their minds the election is already over. They are most worried what if Bill does something accidentally to torpedo HRC (remember the SC primary in 2007).

SO: Every-day there is game. What can Bill do or what cannot he do?

This interview was discussed as coming out of the game.

I am so lucky. I am in the knee-deep of the democratic brain trust.

HRC for 2016 - the election is over.