April 11, 2013

"Man tries to take photo of beaver; it kills him."

Take a lesson, men.

51 comments:

KLDAVIS said...

Ominous.

LarsPorsena said...

What next? A killer clam?

Tibore said...

Frank: Nice beaver!
Jane: Thanks, I just had it stuffed.

alan markus said...

I liked this other item at the link:

a Komodo dragon "sunk its teeth into" an 83-year-old Indonesian woman on Tuesday -- but she was able to fend it off.

Mitchell the Bat said...

It's a shame no doctor got to stitch him up and say "Another half-inch to the right and you'd be dead."

Nomennovum said...

Is this related to your earlier post about the yoni, Ann?

Nomennovum said...

Frank: Nice beaver!
Jane: Thanks, I just had it stuffed.


Some of the best lines ever in comedy.

Rob said...

Bitten to death by a beaver. Paging Dr. Freud . . . .

Nomennovum said...

It is said that some men have nightmares about beavers with teeth.

DADvocate said...

Jeff Foxworthy tells a story of a guy who got his nipple bitten off by a beaver.

Nomennovum said...

Walt Disney has a lot to answer for. He, more that any perhaps, is responsible for getting people to believe that wild animals are peaceable and harmless creatures that can be treated like newborn puppies.

Leland said...

If it will save one life, ban beavers!

Scott M said...

At least it didn't bite off his nipple.

Darrell said...

Every young man in America dreams of death by beaver. Sometimes you get your wish.

chickelit said...

We don't hear much from Loafing Oaf these days.

Similar fate?

oleh said...

Vagina dentata...

Wait, is this not word association?

DADvocate said...

Belarus?! Sheesh, everyone knows Belarus has the only carnivorous, perdatory beavers in the world. Of the animal kind, that is.

ricpic said...

What's the lesson, use a telephoto lens?

Rusty said...

How many times I got to tell you morons? Don't annoy the wildlife.

Skyler said...

Take a lesson? Yes, know how to use a tourniquet.

Women too.

traditionalguy said...

Free the Beavers!

After hundreds of years of trapping, skinning and hat making from your family's skin , you to would attack the silly white men on sight.

EMD said...

This is why women are not invited to cock fights.

Lem said...

I thought this story was about the human Beaver.

I pictured a paparazzi getting hit by a car while trying to take Beavers picture... or the paparazzi maybe falling into an open manhole as he was moving and not paying too much attention to anything other than the human Beaver.

You should add your re-direction tag.

Lem said...

Truth?

I'm sorry it was not my version of events?

Marshal said...

I hope whatever made this beaver react this way isn't contagious. If beaver photography becomes dangerous we'll all suffer.

Original Mike said...

...but as he approached to take a photograph, the beaver bit him on the thigh."

How does a beaver manage to bite a man's thigh? Was he lying on the ground?

Baron Zemo said...

chickelit said...
We don't hear much from Loafing Oaf these days.

That's not fair.

Sarah Palin's doesn't have teeth!

Inga said...

Maybe the photographer flashed a woody and the beaver mistook it for a log.

edutcher said...

Where's Peter?

Chip S. said...

One should also be careful when taking photos of landing strips.

Original Mike said...

"Maybe the photographer flashed a woody and the beaver mistook it for a log."

Beavers are nearsighted.

CWJ said...

Inga FTW!

Aridog said...

a Komodo dragon "sunk its teeth into" an 83-year-old Indonesian woman on Tuesday -- but she was able to fend it off.

Fended it off, eh. So how long did it take her to die?

Lem said...

Wasn't this beaver in charge of security at Mitch McConnell's reelect?

rhhardin said...

You were a little hard on the Beaver last night, Ward.

rhhardin said...

Komodo dragon authority Bob and Ray

Meade said...

Leave It To Whitey

Dante said...

The Beaver monologues.

James said...

Hey, you just lost a regular reader. Good luck in your future endeavors.

lemondog said...

I vant to be alone.....I just VANT to be alone.....

bagoh20 said...

The lesson is to not back down, the beaver is testing you. If it tries to bite you, go for the field goal.

Fritz said...

Seriously; a beaver joke?

Alex said...

Never look a beaver in the eye, that's like a challenger to a ghetto gangbanger.

AllenS said...

Did I ever tell you people that I was almost taken out by a beaver? About 5 years ago, I was on my way up to St. Croix Falls, and right before the Osceola Gun Club, there is some low swampy area north of Lotus Lake, and a beaver had a poplar tree chewed through which fell right in front of my GEO Metro car. I was able to stop in time and no damage, but wholly fuck. Who knew beavers were so dangerous?

Is that a beaver in your pocket, or are you just trying to kill me?

dbp said...

It is well known that beavers can bite through wood...

heyboom said...

A lesson for men only? I guess if a woman takes a picture of a beaver it's considered a self-portrait?

Rusty said...

bagoh20 said...
The lesson is to not back down, the beaver is testing you. If it tries to bite you, go for the field goal.

Do you have any idea how big those things get?
And the animal can get pretty big too.

virgil xenophon said...

Do all of you people--ALL of you--not realize what is meted out to people who make such puns?

PUNishment..

exhelodrvr1 said...


Outlaw beavers!!

Or at least magazines that have a high capacity for them.

William said...

Think of how much more gruesome the death would have been if the beaver had encountered an overachieving homosexual who wanted a bigger thrill than hamsters,

Scoblog said...

Just another beaver-eats-man news story.