May 31, 2011

"I've really never understood the business... of sending these pictures to women."



Can someone please explain to Mark Schmitt — and everyone else with this comprehension problem — why some men send pictures of their genitalia to women?

AND: Here's an even more awkward effort by a Blogginghead to talk about erections. I especially love the way this clip — which I edited to enhance the humorous effect — begins with the diavloggers being all out of synch talking about how lovers can be out of synch. (Warning: the phrase "morning wood" pops up.)

93 comments:

rhhardin said...

Wiener embraced his name on Imus long ago, saying he'd heard all the name jokes.

I doubt it.

Shouting Thomas said...

Well, as you suggested in the Brett Farve case, I considered sending my girl a picture of my money...

So, I emptied out my bank account and converted everything into one dollar bills. It wasn't such an impressive picture.

My dick at full flag exceeded the height of the pile of ones, so I sent the picture of the dick instead.

It's all about weiner today, isn't it?

Drew said...

Then can someone explain it to me?

MadisonMan said...

If you've never understood it, you've never seen a peacock.

FloridaSteve said...

I don't have a clue... It can only hurt your cause.

Shouting Thomas said...

Just to get a girl's opinion, Althouse:

Would you consider a picture of a dick alongside a picture of the dick's money aesthetically pleasing?

Patrick said...

In this case, ego overcomes the fear of getting caught and the (again in this case) fairly low chance of any severe consequences.

Weiner won't file a report. MSM won't bring it up in a meaningful way.

rhhardin said...

Old cartoon (Gary Larson?) of two peahens seated at a restaurant table and a peacock in full display nearby

"Just ignore him."

FloridaSteve said...

Even if you REALLY measure up then you're still putting yourself in the "creepy" zone.

Robert Cook said...

Well...why would a man flash women in public?

Such men are exhibitionists and get a sexual thrill out of witnessing (or imagining) the shocked or startled (or imagined pleasurable?) reactions of the women to whom they expose themselves.

Kirk Parker said...

At first I was mystified too.

But then I remembered this immortal line: "The kind of chicks who would double up on a guy like me do!"

wv: headress. Weiner might have been wearing a hedress in that picture, but you can't tell.

Hoosier Daddy said...

Size only matters to women when It's your bank account.

rhhardin said...

John and Ken (KFI) not long ago, linking to a pic of a blue phallus that was at an airport that the Pope would arrive at shortly, grosses out their news babe

News Babe: Eeeuuuuww

John: That's the sound a woman makes when she sees a penis.

With penises and women, it seems to be a complex calculation. Probably Weiner was expecting one side or the other of that. It doesn't seem likely to succeed to me, but that's just the women I know.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

Can someone please explain to Mark Schmitt — and everyone else with this comprehension problem

Yes. Please do. I certainly don't get it.

Why someone would jeapordize their marriage, family, career, reputation by sending a photo or sexting message. Is it the danger element that can't be resisted? If so, how weak is that.

I guess the same question can be asked about women who send the same dopey stuff on the net.

If you are going to be unfaithful and put all of your work and life at risk, then why not just do it, instead of sending a wimpy photo. You can crash your marriage just as well by doing the 'real' literal thing instead of virtually being unfaithful.

It just seems dumb to me: little return (virtual thrills instead of literal thrills) for high risk when the results of either are the same.

edutcher said...

Two reasons

I want you, I need you, I love you with all my heart

I can't live without you.

About 2 years ago, Ann would have understood perfectly.

She might have laughed, she might have thanked Heaven someone near and dear wouldn't do something like that, but she would have understood.

rhhardin said...

Penis is on the air a lot recently as a word, evidently having gotten some FCC pass that allows polite forms of amusing incidents.

G Joubert said...

The perv factor, and the lethal risk to the public image of a nationally-known pol, both notwithstanding, I'm thinking it's not the quickest way to most girl's hearts in any event. But, as they say, add alcohol to the equation, and bad judgment follows.

Ann Althouse said...

"Would you consider a picture of a dick alongside a picture of the dick's money aesthetically pleasing?"

Just wear expansive panties for your bulge pics, Shouting.

Ann Althouse said...

"she would have understood"

Oh, bullshit. I haven't said one thing about what I do and don't understand now or what I have understood in the past. I'm simply inviting discussion.

Lincolntf said...

I don't know why guys think it's a good idea, but I have a theory on this case.
Weiner had been lightly flirting with the girl/s and was working up to an actual sexual encounter. The pic was an escalation that he hoped would result in a positive response, at which point he'd plan a trip to Seattle.
The pecker-pic seems bizarre, but in the context of "sexting" I assume it's a pretty normal thing. Don't know, I got married before Twitter existed.

RuyDiaz said...

Then can someone explain it to me?

Drew;

Most of the 'sendings' are not out of the blue, but part of an escalation: they exchange text messages, maybe a riske joke or two, he asks for a picture of her on her underwear and receives her, THEN he sends the picture.

Even if she doesn't particularly like the picture, she may file the act under 'he did something bold and outrageous', which women tend to like.

Brett Favre's case can be explained by his status: Favre being Favre, he was used to women throwing themselves at him, so he went to the 'send' phase without bothering to go through the escalation process. As crude as the technique looks, chances are Favre scored before trying such a risky pass.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

About 2 years ago, Ann would have understood perfectly.

Leaving Ann and Meade out this personally, there is a very big difference between two single people dallying around on the internet until they meet in real life and a MARRIED man or woman being unfaithful and putting everything in danger.

One is kind of cute and in a way normal in this day of E-harmony type relationships. In the olden days, they would be called 'pen pals'. The other is just plain stupid.

BTW: my husband made a very good point. If we want to know who's bulge is in the photos, just ask Mrs. Weiner. The underwear is the tell. Some men wear boxers, others wear briefs. The underwear in the Weiner tweet (/snicker) is distinctive and a wife knows what kind her husband wears.

rhhardin said...

Morning wood isn't sexual.

You could escalate it, but no faster than starting from scratch.

Shouting Thomas said...

BTW: my husband made a very good point.

How big was the point?

Did you take a picture?

edutcher said...

Dust Bunny Queen said...

About 2 years ago, Ann would have understood perfectly.

...

BTW: my husband made a very good point. If we want to know who's bulge is in the photos, just ask Mrs. Weiner. The underwear is the tell. Some men wear boxers, others wear briefs. The underwear in the Weiner tweet (/snicker) is distinctive and a wife knows what kind her husband wears.


This assumes, in this particular case, she would know.

Salamandyr said...

You know, it's actually very common for women to send sexting pics. I actually was going to write that it's more common for women to do so than men, but I don't have numbers to back that up. But I have numerous acquaintances who've received unsolicited photo's from female acquaintances. Heck, webcam selfpics are often their own category on porn sites now.

The question isn't really "what causes men to send pictures of their genitals to members of the opposite sex?" but what causes people, of both sexes to do so. The answer is pretty simple when you think about it.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

How big was the point?

LOL! I knew that someone would say that after I posted the comment.

Did you take a picture?


Yes, we do have pictures :-D

No, we are not sending them on the internet.

Henry said...

It depends on the type of woman you're trying to impress.

YoungHegelian said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Shouting Thomas said...

We men are very interested in pictures of vaginas.

We just keep hoping that you girls will reciprocate. Alas…

Shouting Thomas said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Milwaukee said...

Bizarre behavior like this can be explained by it's previous successes. As some have suggested, this might be part of an escalation. None the less, this has probably worked for him in the past.

The Weiner wife is a former Hilary Rodham Clinton aide, Hilary being a wife who has weathered many the storms of a philandering husband. The official at their wedding was none other than Wondering Willy himself. What sort of message is there that a man who has so famous betrayed his oaths, to his wife and his country, would preside over their exchanging wedding vows?

Perhaps this is part of the game women play: egging on their future mating partner to see what extent their stupidity in demonstrating affection. Then, "Oh, I guess you love me a lot, so let's bang away."

Any women commenters out there want to admit that such wooing had ever worked on them?

YoungHegelian said...

I think penis-postings are just guys really misunderstanding what chicks are looking for. I mean, guys really like their penises. Their penis is the center of their sexual world. So, from the guy's point of view, this means chicks should really be interested in a guy's penis, right?

Well, no. It doesn't work that way. The female mind is looking for something else in a mate.

And just so the ladies don't get all high and mighty, let me point out the risible female equivalent, seen in every female profile on the web -- "I'm a professional, accomplished woman". Yeah, right, like the guys give a shit. Every guy who reads that thinks "So, what's your cup size, sweetie."

It's after they've got a mortgage and kids in college that "professional, accomplished" becomes a turn on for guys.

JohnJ said...

"Such men are exhibitionists…"

Perhaps.

But have you seen Weiner on cable news? He's an immature jerk. I don't mean to trivialize his apparent transgression, but it looks more like a Spring Break calling card than the needy trawling of an exhibitionist.

In his mind, forty-six is the new eighteen. He's in Congress, full of himself, and making up for the time lost to being a homely schmuck.

More pathetic than disturbing.

Sofa King said...

(Warning: the phrase "morning wood" pops up.)

Cheeky! This ought to get some Google hits.

MadisonMan said...

Pops up.

(snicker)

MadisonMan said...

Sofa King!

Bob Ellison said...

There's a fap for that.

edutcher said...

Ann Althouse said...

"she would have understood"

Oh, bullshit. I haven't said one thing about what I do and don't understand now or what I have understood in the past. I'm simply inviting discussion.


Maybe not this particular behavior - I know you have your position to consider - but being in love means doing something silly once in a while. I recall you were rather flattered when younger folk would yell, "Get a room!", when you two would kiss in public.

Scott M said...

Why someone would jeapordize their marriage, family, career, reputation by sending a photo or sexting message. Is it the danger element that can't be resisted?

There's one...and only one...good reason for this behavior. It's completely excusable if the man in question had a better than even chance of wrangling a three-way by so behaving.

I believe the traditional vows are, "love, honor, and cherish...except in the face of a three-way"

Pastafarian said...

Apparently edutcher and I are the only two true romantics here.

When I send a photo of my engorged penis to a woman, I'm thinking of how much I love them; specifically, "I have 7* throbbing inches of love for you" and "let me stick my never-ending affection inside you."

It's like sending a single red rose, only with more ball-hair.

*(Using a combination of measurement from the taint, with projections from Michael Mann's computer models.)

Fred4Pres said...

I suspect he knows the motivation of why a guy would send such photographs, I suspect he questions why it would either work or be a good idea.

It is never a good idea. I doubt it would work. And if a girl is going to respond to a photo, you might as well call her on the telephone and tell her to come over. That would work too.

traditionalguy said...

Internet romances between strangers are common today. Sending pictures is another stage in the relationship. To be that risk taking today is a lesson that is hard to teach. But the Weiner style will change after this.

Fred4Pres said...

Pastafarian, or 3.5 inches as the case may be. Wiener was more of a vienna sausage.

William said...

I'm sure that some rap songs are better than others, but to me they are all just noise. I'm sure that some tattoos are more stylish than others but to me they are all just body graffiti. I suppose that, for some, sexting messages are a graceful part of the mating ritual but, to me, they appear obscene and/or exhibitionist....It is a peculair feature of modern times that just when you arrive at the age that other civilizations used to consider the age of wisdom, you end up befuddled, shocked, and out of step. From what I've read, when the waltz craze hit Europe in the nineteenth century, the elder generation acted pretty much the way we do.

MayBee said...

Men love their penises and love seeing pictures of naked women, and so they imagine women are going to love seeing pictures of their penises. It's all a misunderstanding.

Now, I enjoy seeing a penis, but there is good penis and bad penis. A penis photo sent without warning, all aroused and ready, is too aggressive to be sexy. Too desperate. It's too narcissistic.

edutcher said...

Pastafarian said...

Apparently edutcher and I are the only two true romantics here.

When I send a photo of my engorged penis to a woman, I'm thinking of how much I love them; specifically, "I have 7* throbbing inches of love for you" and "let me stick my never-ending affection inside you."


There's always a certain phase in a relationship where, in the case of love and desire, it's this side of impossible to tell where one ends and the other begins.

Curious George said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Patrick said...

Sounds like Kloppenberg is going to concede? JSONLINE reporting she called Prosser, won't say why.

YoungHegelian said...

@pasta,

"It's like sending a single red rose, only with more ball-hair."

I've never seen a rose with any ball hair at all!

Is the ball hair variety a special rose I can order from FTD? Could you send me the SKU?

The Mrs. will be so surprised on our next anniversary!

MayBee said...

There's one...and only one...good reason for this behavior. It's completely excusable if the man in question had a better than even chance of wrangling a three-way by so behaving.

I believe the traditional vows are, "love, honor, and cherish...except in the face of a three-way"


You think he was looking for another man to satisfy Huma along with him?

Oligonicella said...

Ann Althouse --

ST: "Would you consider a picture of a dick alongside a picture of the dick's money aesthetically pleasing?"

AA: "Just wear expansive panties for your bulge pics, Shouting."

And what? Send them to a cross-dresser?

richard mcenroe said...

"Wiener embraced his name on Imus long ago, saying he'd heard all the name jokes."

The day is young...

'Wags' Weiner version of Parrot Sketch draws raves at House Variety Night

'Wags' Weiner to gavel 112th Congress into session -- with no hands!

Given his, er, length of service, is it OK to call "Wags" Weiner a long-standing member of Congress?

garage mahal said...

Now that Weiner has lawyered up, I wonder if Breibart will do the same? Or patriotusa76, aka Dan Wolf.

Patrick said...

Watching the live feed of Kloppenberg's announcement, but can't get sound. Her face doesn't look like she's conceding. Looks like she's arguing a case for suing.

Patrick said...

Of course right after I write that, the screen says "Kloppenberg concedes." It's over.

Patrick said...

Garage,

Breitbart and that Patriot guy have both asked for investigations. Weiner hasn't.

What does that tell the objective observer?

Patrick said...

Kloppenberg sure is blathering on a lot for someone who is conceding.

Oligonicella said...

Ann Althouse --

"Oh, bullshit. I haven't said one thing about what I do and don't understand now or what I have understood in the past."

Someone who frequently makes expositions on what she believes others are thinking should expect others to delve into her thoughts. You're not above being figured out anymore than anyone else.

Pastafarian said...

edutcher said: "There's always a certain phase in a relationship where, in the case of love and desire, it's this side of impossible to tell where one ends and the other begins."

See, that's what I keep trying to convince people. Would you mind testifying on my behalf at a little deposition? "Lewd and lascivious behavior" my ass. More like "caring and affectionate behavior."

garage mahal said...

What does that tell the objective observer?

It tells me Weiner has a lawyer and Breibart/Dan Wolf do not. I didn't pay attention to the story last weekend, but now it's actually pretty interesting.

Patrick said...

On the whole, I find Prof. Althouse's theory that this was an underling's mistake and fault quite plausible. I know nothing about Weiner, but it does seem odd that he would have the time to tweet that much, including some apparently clever ones. I am curious how he decided to follow a 21 year old from the other side of the continent, however.

MayBee said...

What do we imagine congressmen do all day if we think they don't have time to tweet?

Pastafarian said...

Patrick, I believe there were two very big reasons for his choosing to follow this young lady.

Having seen the Weiner shot, the question is: Why did she follow him? Because I don't see a very big reason there.

edutcher said...

Pastafarian said...

edutcher said: "There's always a certain phase in a relationship where, in the case of love and desire, it's this side of impossible to tell where one ends and the other begins."

See, that's what I keep trying to convince people. Would you mind testifying on my behalf at a little deposition? "Lewd and lascivious behavior" my ass. More like "caring and affectionate behavior."


If it's some poor, unsuspecting woman, then Pasta's gonna need a lot of lawyers, but consider a long-term intimate relationship, possibly separated by distance for a short time.

In any case, I'm wondering if Weiner is in an Ahnold-Maria situation.

ricpic said...

In James Jones' Some Came Running, one of the major characters, a pillar of the community businessman, starts going out in the evenings and peeping into his neighbors' bedrooms, knowing that if discovered it would mean the end of everything he had worked to build his whole life. I don't think that Jones explains the phenomenon, there may be no explanation, but he does capture the driven compulsive nature of such behavior.

Weiner couldn't help himself. Neither could the frog caught in NY. Neither will the next high profile figure who knows the danger but is helplessly caught in the grip of a compulsion.

Ann Althouse said...

"Maybe not this particular behavior - I know you have your position to consider - but being in love means doing something silly once in a while. I recall you were rather flattered when younger folk would yell, "Get a room!", when you two would kiss in public."

My understanding of it is the guy is being playful and showing that he knows he can take liberties in his form of expression with this particular woman as he says: Look what you're doing to me.

Robert Cook said...

Personally, I can't understand tweeting or the appeal of Twitter. Who cares? Why should anyone be interested in the minutiae of my life--assuming I cared to share it, which I don't--particularly if they don't know me, and why should I care about the minutiae of someone else's life, (which I don't), particularly if I don't know them?

DADvocate said...

Makes no sense to me. This is one of those situations where you can list all the reasons, mental and psychological processes that go into it, etc. And it still makes no sense. Sure, there's an explanation, but it's nonsensical.

Ron said...

This thread requires the subtle sagacity of Trooper York.

Ann Althouse said...

How are people able to estimate the size of the penis? It's such a closeup. There's nothing else in the photo to compare it to... unless you're going by the texture of the fabric of the underpants. Maybe you're assuming a fine-gauge thread when it's actually more coarse.

Ann Althouse said...

"I am curious how he decided to follow a 21 year old from the other side of the continent, however."

Maybe the ghost-tweeter lives in Seattle. That would explain that other "Seattle time" tweet that people are talking about.

edutcher said...

Ann Althouse said...

"Maybe not this particular behavior - I know you have your position to consider - but being in love means doing something silly once in a while. I recall you were rather flattered when younger folk would yell, "Get a room!", when you two would kiss in public."

My understanding of it is the guy is being playful and showing that he knows he can take liberties in his form of expression with this particular woman as he says: Look what you're doing to me.


Precisely.

You can be in love with someone and have a good enough relationship to say, "I miss you so much, can't wait to be near you", etc., in ways that one wouldn't try otherwise. Usually this in done in a letter or something similar so it's just known to the two lovers.

Broadcasting it on the Internet through a social media site puts it out for the universe to see.

Ann Althouse said...

"The question isn't really "what causes men to send pictures of their genitals to members of the opposite sex?" but what causes people, of both sexes to do so. The answer is pretty simple when you think about it."

But the assumption that the man wants to see the woman's parts seems much sounder than the assumption that the woman wants to see the man's.

Carol_Herman said...

Even 2 minutes worth, I couldn't watch it all!

Do you know how many men screw at the office?

Do you know in how many marriages (in the old day when they lasted till death) ... sex stopped first.

Or, like the Jewish comedians joked: "My wife has a headache."

We stopped worrying about "ceilings needing paint," because the eyesight goes before the urges die.

You know, you might as well ask why a man in a bar would turn to a female stranger and ask her if she wanted to screw. (If she's stupid enough to give him a phone number. Why then, he goes to the bathroom, and writes it on the wall.) He might do this, anyway.

Did Weiner send the photo? I think lots of people think he did. And, his excuses, after getting caught, are very lame.

Carol_Herman said...

Oh, there's a Jewish story.

About a beautiful woman who was sporting a huge diamond ring. One of her friends commented about it's beauty. Only to be told "but it comes with the Finklestein curse."

Poor lady was engaged to Mr. Finklestein.

Carol_Herman said...

Ah, famous "bulge" pictures.

There's the one of algore. With a sock stuffed down his jeans.

And, then, there's General Patton taking a wizz in the Rhine. Which was something he had promised his men he would do.

Anthony Weiner, however, has underscored the "Monica factor." He's at home. He's lonely. And, he doesn't think of his wife at all.

Bad marriages made by politicians are sometimes kept that way, because wifey provides a beard.

We know Tipper Gore went for a divorce. Ditto. Same with Maria Schriver.

Anthony Weiner may have a problem on his hands with Huma. Not that I care. Who know? Maybe, Hillary is throwing lamps around a room, somewhere?

Oligonicella said...

Yes. Poor woman, chose to become engaged to a man she didn't respect, just for his money.

Poor woman.

garage mahal said...

"I am curious how he decided to follow a 21 year old from the other side of the continent, however."

She chose to follow him. She then jokingly said Weiner was his boyfriend, which then caught the eye of one "patriotusa76", who tweeted endlessly about it, and magically caught the photo before it was deleted. Hmmmmmm.....

Scott M said...

Nothing magic about it. You can code bots to check for and download any changes to a given set of files. It's not that difficult to do.

Patrick said...

I would be curious to hear the reaction of people on the left to this interview: http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2011/05/31/rep-weiners-twitter-troubles/

Does it make you confident that his account was hacked? No answers at all. Response?

rhhardin said...

An Imus stock joke is to remember that to attract women the potato in your pants goes in the front not the back.

Stephen A. Meigs said...

"But the assumption that the man wants to see the woman's parts seems much sounder than the assumption that the woman wants to see the man's."

It's largely an anti oral sodomy thing. Visual interest in a male's penis tends to cause proximity of the eyes to the penis. Since the eyes are near the mouth, this interest therefore can lead to dangerous proximity of the mouth to penis.

Also, males tend to make the first moves in relationships, which makes judging by (visual) appearance more useful in males.

On other hand, guys who rightly believe in being open with females about their feelings toward them can get frustrated by females excessively thinking that expressing an interest in sex explicitly and fairly quickly is akin to rape. If a male feels unjustly constrained and he's not unusually sane, he is more in danger of exploding in somewhat unjust ways. But sending unsolicited nude pictures is one of morally worst ways for male to explode (short of the extremely reprehensible rape, forcible sodomy, or other violence), because pictures come at one all at once, and so one doesn't have much opportunity to avoid looking at them enough to be affected by them once one notices them.

There is porn, etc., that one wishes one hadn't seen, because one knows there is something ugly deceptive about it that makes one unusually concerned that one has disarmed it correctly. That said, it's very important for people and young people in particular to realize that being touched by nasty porn evil is basically nothing compared to actually having been sodomized.

Carol_Herman said...

Hidden, so far, is the first four minutes!

First, the picture gets sent.

Then, the shocked reaction of the viewer. (The Twitter-ee?) She went, "My account's been hacked by a stalker."

Which gave Weiner his first "out."

Four minutes later ... his account is erased. And, so is hers.

Was Weiner apologetic?

Or, did he succumb to temptation? By saying, "let's remove all the evidence. That will show your hacker who he's fooling with, this time."

Roasted Wiener. Just in case the lady decides to write a book.

Sure, she'd have to go to Regenery to get it published. But no matter.

It's been awhile since a Monica story erupted in the news.

And, what does this one have?

HILLARY! I bet she's throwing lamps. And, Anthony better duck.

Orinoco said...

Do you suspect that women who flash men in New Orleans during Mardi Gras are doing it for beads?

Dusty said...

Some men send it because the woman asks for one. Sometimes they exchange them at the same time, as in, "I'll send you one if you send me one."

Van Halen said...

Pornstars
High school girls
Pictures of private parts
Girls tweeting that the Weiner is their 'boyfriend'
The Weiner's PR guy lies about the timeline of what happened
The Weiner erases all evidence when hacking the account of a Congressman would certainly be investigated as a Federal crime
The Weiner won't admit as to whether he sent the lewd photo or not
Leftwing media sites go into damage-control mode by ignoring story when you know if this were Todd Palin...

I wonder what Weiner's wife thinks of all this?

Curious George said...

"Van Halen said...
I wonder what Weiner's wife thinks of all this?"


"Hillary's cock was bigger"?

Big Mike said...

Why do men send pictures of their genitals to women?

Maybe because the prostitutes he normally hires keep telling him that "Oh! it's so big!" and "Oh no! You're splitting me in two."

And the stupid schmuck believes it.

So he tries to impress women with his endowment the way women with double D-cups impress a lot of men.

That's the most likely explanation.

And the best response the young lady could make is "Hey! That looks just like a penis except much, much smaller."

Ben said...

The crotch shot dilemma certainly does show the limits of the golden rule.

But, you can apply Kant's principle of universalizability. The test is: can you make a universal rule, and does it still make logical sense? So we have to imagine if, under this hypothetical rule, everyone was sending pictures of their crotch to everyone else.

It would be nuts.

ken in sc said...

All women are not the same. I once had a very cute girl--in her 20s--ask for a picture of my dick. She wanted to visualize it in her red fox, she said.

el polacko said...

YoungHegelian nails it, so to speak: guys really like their dicks..i mean REALLY like them..and, being the visually-oriented creatures that they are, they see no reason why an ostensibly hetero woman would NOT want to check it out.
for women, sharing naughty pics is a much more complicated dance involving that whole maddona/whore thing. women stress out about 'where this is all heading and what it all means'..'should i show a little ankle or send a tit shot and why isn't my cute face enough for him?'..'if this relationship progresses will he be able to provide for me and our children?'...etc...etc..etc...
it's really a wonder that heteros hook up at all.

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