October 16, 2008

Talk about anything at the Autumn Leaf Café.

DSC09537

176 comments:

TMink said...

I voted yesterday, it felt good. It felt REAL good. I was proud to vote against every incumbent. That meant I voted for two Democrats. I did so proudly.

Throw the bums out.

Trey

MadisonMan said...

Trey, that's my plan also.

Autumn Leaves is the treacly piano piece with all the arpeggios isn't it? But treacly can be soothing.

reader_iam said...

Eva's "Autumn Leaves"

reader_iam said...

Damn, that broad was something. Such a shame she died so young.

Titusbackintownok? said...

Currently, I am having cream of mushroom soup and a turkey sandwich with apple, goat cheese and field greens. It was purchased from a new fabulous cafe across the street from my home.

I am savoring all of the flavors as they mix and mesh in my mouth.

It's delish.

T Mack said...

So Ann, professor of law, are you still going to vote for Obama?
Vote for someone who is breaking the law to win by employing ACORN to commit voter fraud?
Are you going to break your oath and vote for Obama and thus make a mockery of what you teach and what you are?
Let's hear it.

walter neff said...

You a law professor.

Who only wants to look at a mans shcok.

reader_iam said...

Boy, it sure is obvious that T Mack didn't follow my links. How un-Zen.

reader_iam said...

Elections are ephemeral. Dead leaves are forever.

dannyboy said...

I just to give a shout out to those enviroweenies who banned leaf burning. FUCK YOU! It's bad enough the babes are starting to cover up their beautiful skin to ward off the cold and they take this away too.

The best part of fall was the beautifully fragrant smell of burning leaves and now we can't do it anymore because some hippie pussy said its bad for the environment.

I'd like to kick all their asses.

Titusbackintownok? said...

T Mack take a deep breath and celebrate the fall leaves.

Anger is nothing to embrace.

My sandwich also has homemade fig jam on it. Yum.

MadisonMan said...

By the way, add this to the list of things I will not wear.

rhhardin said...

Maples are better with wind .

Simon said...

I love autumn. Such a pretty time - I drove to Cincinatti recently and the last twenty or thirty miles or so was just a lovely view. Sometimes I drive down to Bloomington, Ind., and the trip's always lovely in autumn.

reader_iam said...
"Eva's 'Autumn Leaves'"

She was so good.

reader_iam said...

Titus: I'm all for variety and diversity and everything--but that lunch of yours is turning into a dog's breakfast. What next, an orange juice chaser for your post-lunch teeth-brushing?

reader_iam said...

Oh, I forgot. You're not too picky about what you put in your mouth.

; )

reader_iam said...

We traveled between Iowa and Delaware recently and were treated to some mighty fine mountain autumnscapes, especially on the return leg.

Christopher said...

Here in Massachusetts, governor Deval "Obama's Mini-Me" Patrick has begun cutting the state budget, in advance of a vote next month to eliminate the state income tax. This morning he was on the radio lugubriously intoning that this spartan budget means fewer police, fewer firemen, fewer teachers, delayed infrastructure repair, blah, blah, blah - all designed to fool Massachusetts voters into believing the state is near bankruptcy and it wouldn't be prudent to pass Question 1 and leave police, firemen, teachers and kiddies begging for pennies at the side of the cracked, potholed road.

And of course, the flim-flam will work. Even a cursory look at our Senatorial delegation will demonstrate Bay State voters aren't known for their intellectual perspicacity.

But I don't care. In a few hours, I'll be home to stir the crock pot and settle down to a nice big bowl of venison stew with a side of crusty Italian bread. Yum, as Titus says.

Simon said...

So many songs I can think of that I'd like to have heard Eva sing. Can you imagine her singing No Frontiers?

walter neff said...

Shouldn't Eva Braun be on the German thread?

Simon said...

Oh-- or what about her singing Washing of the Water? *shivers*

reader_iam said...

MM: My husband and I first came across mantyhose in this funny little shop in New Hope, Pennsylvania, which we were visiting with a group of friends. My husband's jaw just dropped; he could not get over the very idea. This had to be the summer after we got engaged, because some weisenheimer of a friend snuck back to the shop and bought a couple o f pairs, which he then gave to us as part of a very peculiar (yet funny) shower gift.

Nope, never got worn. But I just got a good laugh remembering the expression on my then-fiance's face. Thanks for linking that, MM.

(I wonder if I still have those, stashed somewhere in a box in the attic? Hmmm. I'd better excavate them before my son discovers them in one of his explorations. There are somethings I REALLY don't want to have to explain.)

dannyboy said...

By the way, add this to the list of things I will not wear.

Ok, now even you panty waist, Birkenstock granola crunchers have to admit that if you saw a guy wearing those even you would kick his ass on general principles.

Ann Althouse said...

The Founding Fathers wore mantyhose.

bill said...

Anything is a compound word. In the usually reliable Rodale Synonym Finder, there is no entry for anything. I'd include at least "stuff." The third and fourth entry for thing will do:

3. things matters, affairs, relations; business, concerns, work; doings, dealings, works, proceedings, operations, goings-on

4. circumstance, situation, state of affairs, turn of events, course of events, conditions; fact, phenomenon, experience, matter, case; event, occurrence, incident, doing; happening, hap, episode, occasion.

Hap is an interesting word, as is hapless -- without hap. Hapless is without luck, so to be with hap is to be fortunate. How was your day, today? It included a modicum of hap. Hap is also an Egyptian bull-deity or a Thomas Hardy sonnet. It may also be a popular child's name in certain communities; oh wait, that was deity. Never mind. My favorite episode of What's Happening!! (Really, this needed two explanation points? The acting should show us, not tell us) was Rerun entering a dance contest. Other than that it sucked ass.

Titusbackintownok? said...

Let's talk about breasts. We haven't spoken about breasts lately.

Breasts are fun. They bounce. They say good morning how are you? I enjoy looking at breasts. I enjoy breasts in diverse weather conditions. Rain, wind, snow, heat, smogs, hurricanes, typhoons, tornadoes, flash floods.

Breasts are friends of all of natures calamities-wow that was profound.

Original George said...

You mean the ColdGear Base 1.0 UnderArmour legging?

--

An 'althing' is what Icelanders call their parliament. Means 'the all thing.' First met in 930.

Titusbackintownok? said...

I just enjoy holding womens breasts in a non-threatening, non-sexual way. I also like the nipple. Nipples come in many shapes, sizes and colors. Nipples are erect in cold weather.

I enjoy the weight of each individual breast in my hand. The countours of the breast are fascinating. The shape of the breast amazing.

Breasts are nice.

Believe it or not i don't care much for balls.

walter neff said...

I love the fact that the election is all about a plumber's crack.

Titusbackintownok? said...

Balls are ugly, hairy and smell after a day of work. I don't like balls.

I don't even like the hog that much. Sure I enjoy looking at it and touching it briefly but I have never been one to love a hog. Some I have met worship the hog and for those I am grateful.

I am an awful cocksucker. I do it for about 5 seconds and then I am done. I find it boring, repetitive and it hurts my mouth.

Trooper York said...

Tom Tresh died yesterday.

A hero of mine from the old Yankees. I got a Tom Tresh bat on bat day in 1964. He was supposed to be the next Mickey Mantle.

May he rest in peace.

Titusbackintownok? said...

I went to a strip club in Montreal where the strippers had breasts and hogs. That was nasty.

I love Montreal. It is a beautiful city. One of my favorite cities in North America. Quebec City is beautiful too.

dannyboy said...

The Founding Fathers wore mantyhose

They wore wigs and makeup too. There are some things men are not supposed to wear. That's about as bad as a guys who wear thongs and I am not talking about the ones on your feet.

Original George said...

The ABC Plumbing repairman at the Loopner's.

Original Norge

Lisa's mom looks like Sara Palin....

Titusbackintownok? said...

I enjoy the underbelly of society. NYC doesn't really have that any more. What is the most seedy city in America?

Providence is actually pretty seedy.

I also enjoy going to small town gay bars in the middle of nowhere. One of the best times I had was in a gay bar in Lewiston Maine. I told this here before but the bar was one of two bars in Lewiston which is a city that is basically a hell hole with the exception of Bates College or is it Bowdoin?

The gay bar was next to a house where the owner would shoot his bb gun at the patrons as they were entering and exiting the bar. I love that shit.

dannyboy said...

Balls are ugly, hairy and smell after a day of work. I don't like balls.

I don't even like the hog that much.


You sound like a piss poor excuse for a fairy. Make up your mind mate.

MadisonMan said...

The Founding Fathers wore mantyhose.

Blatant plea for Sir Archy to show up.

reader_iam said...

Titus, thanks for keeping us abreast.

reader_iam said...

In pointed detail.

reader_iam said...

What a stand-up sorta guy!

reader_iam said...

It takes balls to carry on as you do.

reader_iam said...

No matter how hairy things get, you keep drilling away.

MadisonMan said...

original george, that skit mentions egg salad. Excellent!

reader_iam said...

When times get hard, the hard keep--

Oh, never mind.

reader_iam said...

Did I ever mention, by the way, that whenever I see teevee footage of crowds chanting "Drill now! Drill now! Drill now!", I always think of Titus?

Althouse is so corrupting.

Titusbackintownok? said...

When I first started going to gay bars in Wisconsin they were always in really fucked up places. In the middle of nowhere by some railroad tracks. Some gay bars I went to and their gay names:

Ce La Vie-Milwaukee-home of Jeffrey Dahlmer
Just Friends-Lacrosse
Memories-Appleton
The Office-Rockford
Going My Way-Madison
Rainbow Connection-Superior

When I arrived in Boston the first gay bar I went to was right across from Fenway Park. So in one line was hundreds of queens waiting to get into the gay bar and on the other side of the street sports fans waiting to get into Fenway. All the gay guys were all muscley and huge and no one from the Fenway side said shit. That's when fell in love with the Red Sox.

Triangle Man said...

Keep an eye out for the headline in February:

Madison Man Found Dead of Hypothermia, Refused to Wear Mantyhose

I will start wearing my mantyhose when the temps get down in the teens, but never with shorts.

Titusbackintownok? said...

My mind is made up. I am a fag but that doesn't mean that I have to log the hog.

I bet some straight guys don't love pussy.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

Wow. I can't believe that I didn't know Eva Cassidy. Thanks for posting the link to Autumn Leaves.

The fallen leaves remind me that I need to rake this weekend and put the leaves in the compost pile. I'm planting elephant garlic and french shallots in the raised planting beds for spring harvest. Yum.

We are having an indian summer here with cool crisp mornings and warm clear afternoons so I can sit on my deck at lunch and soak up the sunshine.

I'm sure everyone wanted to know this, lol. Ann said talk about anything.

Titusbackintownok? said...

I love eggs.

I love eggs every way.

I love egg sandwich. I love eggs benedict with a variety of additions. I love eggs benedict with lobster or crab or spinach.

I love eggs with cheese.

I especially love scrambled eggs.

Eggs are good.

I don't like egg salad though. I don't like any kind of "salad sandwich" Examples are tuna, chicken, egg. I hate the combination of the mayonnaise and the celeries and the egg or chicken or tuna. It's gross.

Ann Althouse said...

"Let's talk about breasts."

I was talking to a mammogram technician the other day, and she said she really loved the deflated, pancake-style breasts because they were the easiest kind to get a good image of.

Revenant said...

Autumn is the nicest time of year here in San Diego, even though the santa anas bother my allergies.

Titusbackintownok? said...

Now that we are talking about fall I am thinking of driving up to Vermont this weekend with the rare clumbers.

Vermont is very dog friendly in many of their lodging options.

I love Vermont. So pretty. I love covered bridges. I love buying honey at a farm stand on the side of the road. I love the Green Mountains.

I love therefore I am.

thank you,

Ann Althouse said...

Bleh, now he's talking about egg salad!

I come in here to talk about breasts, at your request, and you spring egg salad on me? That's so wrong.

And those bar names are really depressing.

Titusbackintownok? said...

"I was talking to a mammogram technician the other day, and she said she really loved the deflated, pancake-style breasts because they were the easiest kind to get a good image of."

What an odd thing to say. I would of thought that the larger round style breasts would of been easier to get an image of.

I would like to be that technician for a day just to see the variety of breasts that come in to the office. I would enjoy watching the breast be placed on the machine. I would not enjoy if there was any bad news though.

reader_iam said...

Bait and switch: Tits and yolks.

reader_iam said...

Jeez, Althouse, you mean you weren't offended when the technician complained about your breasts?

Ann Althouse said...

"I would of thought that the larger round style breasts would of been easier to get an image of."

Do you have the slightest idea how a mammogram is done? It involves squishing the breast as flat as possible between two clear plastic plates.

Fortunately, there is no mirror to let you see how ridiculous that looks.

"Thick" breasts -- her word -- are difficult to squish out.

Too many jims said...

MadisonMan,

Let's face it, you've got to be a man to wear tights.

reader_iam said...

I remember being surprised to discover, the first time I had a mammogram, that they hurt.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

Do you have the slightest idea how a mammogram is done? It involves squishing the breast as flat as possible between two clear plastic plates

Men have no idea. When I told my husband about the procedure he was horrified. "Too much information!!"

reader_iam said...

And, like so many routine female-related medical diagnostics, so undignified.

Titusbackintownok? said...

I know those bar names are depressing. It was depressing. They were all "out of sight, out of mind" from the general population.

It was like feel really guilty and ashamed by going to this seedy disgusting establishment. Run to the front door and hope no one sees you.

I said I don't like egg salad. But I do love eggs.

You know what else I love? Breakfasts on the Farms. They have those in Wisconsin and they are amazing.

I also enjoy fall fairs. Maine has some of the greatest fall fairs. I love seeing all the animals. The Freyburg Fair in Maine is incredible. Ox pulls, horses, bees making honey, baby chicks being born, cows, bunnies. People making really amazing quilts. Amazing farm produce and baked items. The midway. The smell, the games. I dig that shit.

Times have changed, thank God.

Titusbackintownok? said...

Oh I didn't know that was how they were examined.

I thought they were just placed on a little cup and a picture is taken. That I would like to watch. Not squishing it between two plasic things. That sounds stifeling.

They way you describe it sounds somewhat degrading.

Do men do that job? I am sure they do but if I was a woman I wouldn't want a man to do that to me unless he was a flaming fudgie.

garage mahal said...

Bill Evans Trio Autumn Leaves.

Titusbackintownok? said...

How often is a woman supposed to go through that test?

Once a year?

walter neff said...

"I was talking to a mammogram technician the other day, and she said she really loved the deflated, pancake-style breasts because they were the easiest kind to get a good image of."

Somewhere Simon is weeping.

Ann Althouse said...

It's always a woman.

Titusbackintownok? said...

What do they do to women when they put you in those stirrups.

I have seen some television shows and or movies where the women is preparing to put her feet in those things but I never knew what they actually do.

Does it hurt? Are they taking a biopsy of your cooch?

Ann Althouse said...

Walter, that was not a description of me.

TMink said...

Mmmm, homemade egg salad sandwiches for lunch!

I do not like all of Eva Cassady's work, on the standards I think she was singing more notes than she was thinking if you know what I mean. A touch of Maria Carey syndrome if you will.

But when I hear her sing "Fields of Gold" I tear up. You guys follow the link, I have more patients to see and they get nervous if I have cried.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L3YVil3Ajjs

Trey

Ann Althouse said...

Titus, "Requiem for a Speculum" explains it.

Titusbackintownok? said...

For men they just grab our balls and stick their finger up our ass for about 1 minute.

Once they are done they smear the ass particles onto a little strip and if blood shows you are in trouble.

Thankfully, blood has never shown. My doc told me I have an ass of a 13 year old boy.

My doctor primarily works on gay men and I asked him if he can tell the difference in an ass that has been fucked a lot and one that hasn't and he said it is night and day.

He said one of his patients told him that before he sticks him finger up the patients ass the patient usually expects dinner and flowers. Ba da ba.

walter neff said...

I demand proof. As do many other of your fanboys.

Perhaps we might raise a little coin for a wager. I bet we can get a lot more than for the egg salad sandwich.

bill said...

You don't have to be a man to wear tights, but you do need to be a man to wear a dance belt.


HOW DO YOU WEAR A DANCE BELT?
When putting on a dance belt it's important to take the time to get all your parts placed where you want them, as comfortably as possible, because once it's on, nothing is supposed to move until you take it off.

To put one on, pull your dance belt up around your waist or hips, to the height you normally wear your pants. Do not try to cheat by wearing it low, hoping to avoid thong tension. Your penis is supposed to end up facing up towards your belly button, so you can get that process started by letting the dance belt catch it as you pull it on. Next, reach inside the dance belt and pull your scrotum up inside the pouch. Your testicles need to be up and front, well clear of their usual dangling position. Adjust your penis position to face straight up. Then, make sure the pouch isn't riding too far up by pulling the pouch's bottom back down and back. Make sure the thong is firmly seated between your butt cheeks, pulling any looseness towards the rear waistband. Again, don't attempt to cheat by letting the thong float loosely. It's going to end up as far up your crack as possible halfway through class, so you should place it where you want it to go rather than leave its comfort to chance.

Freeman Hunt said...

I'm so glad there's a new cafe post because I've been waiting to share this fake Obama quote about his flag pin that came in an email forward. I assume that the people who were forwarding this thought it was real.

According to the email, Obama had this to say on Meet the Press:

As I've said about the flag pin, I don't want to be perceived as taking sides. There are a lot of people in the world to whom the American flag is a symbol of oppression. And the anthem itself conveys a war-like message. You know, the bombs bursting in air and all. It should be swapped for something less parochial and less bellicose. I like the song 'I'd Like To Teach the World To Sing.' If that were our anthem, then I might salute it.'We should consider to reinvent our National Anthem as well as to redesign our Flag to better offer our enemies hope and love. It's my intention, if elected, to disarm America to the level of acceptance to our Middle East Brethren. If we as a Nation of warring people, shou ld conduct ourselves as the nations of Islam, whereas peace prevails. Perhaps a state or period of mutual concord between our governments. When I become President, I will seek a pact or agreement to end hostilities between those who have been at war or in a state of enmity, and a freedom from disquieting oppressive thoughts. We as a Nation have placed upon the nations of Islam an unfair injustice. My wife disrespects the Flag for many personal reasons. Together she and I have attended several flag burning ceremonies in the past, many years ago. She has her views and I have mine'. Of course now, I have found myself about to become the President of the United States and I have put aside my hatred. I will use my power to bring CHANGE to this Nation, and offer the people a new path of hope. My wife and I look forward to becoming our Country's First Family. Indeed, CHANGE is about to overwhelm the United States of America.

Ha! If only he would say such a thing.

Titusbackintownok? said...

OMG Requiem video!!

That thing looks awful and cold and mean.

In one of the other threads someone was talking about Alien.

That thing looks like Aliens mouth.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

Curried creamed eggs over toast or in puff pastry shells. Yummy.

Titusbackintownok? said...

My feel bad that women have to have a period every month.

Margaret Cho did this funny stand up routine where she talked about if men had to have a period how they would react.

She said a man would be at work bitching to everyone about his flow and if he didn't have a tampon handy he would just stick a sock in it.

Freeman Hunt said...

Re: dance belt

Oh my! Do the dancers have to wear those at every practice? It seems like that would discourage men from taking up dancing.

Triangle Man said...

I don't know if this is one of "the standards" that TMink meant, but Eva Cassidy does my favorite version of "Somewhere Over the Rainbow".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eUwTdqPkluY

Someone tried singing it this way for an American Idol audition two seasons back and, predictably, butchered it.

Pogo said...

Nearly all medical tests are degrading because being exposed as fully human means the thin venneer of civilization is removed, and all that is left is animal, or object.

Plus the positions are really really awkward, and the gown is too small and open in the back which doesn't help matters.

reader_iam said...

That dance-belt comment is why I love commenter Bill, in a nutshell.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

Margaret Cho did this funny stand up routine where she talked about if men had to have a period how they would react.

I had a female boss one time who was in a really foul mood (PMS time) She sat at her desk and calculated all the days she had been on her period in her life and announced to us all that it came up to about 5 years totaled together.

Titusbackintownok? said...

Back to Autumn. I love this time of year. The weather has been beautiful here too. 70-75 every day with cool nights.

My parents said Wisconsin has been beautiful too. They are going to Gays Mills this weekend for all the apple stuff. Last weekend they were in Baraboo by our cottage and went to the Baraboo Art Fair. Baraboo is a very cute Wisconsin town. It has a great town square with a neat town hall and beautiful restored theater. I love Baraboo. Although, that Wrigling Bros thing is a complete waste of time and money. I love going to a restaurant called The Log Cabin in Baraboo-great homemade pies.

knox said...

Bait and switch: Tits and yolks.

The proper analogy would be "nipples and yolks"

egg::tit
yolk::nipple

Not to titpick.

walter neff said...

Lets have a divalog at Bare-a-boob.

Original George said...

Lisa, dear.. making a baby is like.. it's um.. it's like making egg salad. You, the woman, produce the eggs, and the man furnishes the mayonnaisse - of course, you don't need chopped celery for.. oh, I've just given you my egg salad recipe, and I was saving that for your 21st birthday..

Japan's Kewpie mayonaisu actually shows a baby on the squeeze bottle.

The sauce may have been christened mayennaise after Charles de Lorraine, duke of Mayenne, because he took the time to finish his meal of chicken with cold sauce before being defeated in the Battle of Arques. Though, this suggestion was first made by the nineteenth-century culinary writer Pierre Lacam.

---

Gloria Steinem's essay on men struation is probably the only funny thing she ever wrote.

Modika said...

Has anyone here seen Martin Eisenstadt's latest post about "Joe the Plumber"?

It seems that Joe is a close relative of Charles Keating's son-in-law. Hmmm...

Titusbackintownok? said...

"I had a female boss one time who was in a really foul mood (PMS time) She sat at her desk and calculated all the days she had been on her period in her life and announced to us all that it came up to about 5 years totaled together."

That is really depressing.

Are there any operations that can stop the women from having her period? Not that they would but some of my girlfriends have told me that they pain can be excruciating. I wonder if some women have opted to try and do something about it in order to alleviate the pain. Is there anything?

Other than menopause and pregnancy is there anything that stops a woman from having her period? Would that be something that women want? I don't know, just curious.

walter neff said...

Isn't he also the great grandson of
Anastasia the last of the Romanoff's.

Titusbackintownok? said...

Does a period last for about a week?

I was in drum and bugle corps for many years and toured with a bunch of women for the entire summer and they started to get their periods at the same time. Is there a name for that? Why does that happen?

Titusbackintownok? said...

Can women have sex during their period? Do they want to? Do men want to? Is their a name for men and or women who actually get into sex while a women is having her period? I am sure there is.

Titusbackintownok? said...

A women at work who I always give big hugs too always tells me not to hug her because her boobs hurt during her period.

She say "don't touch me my boobs are killing me".

bill said...

reader_iam said...
That dance-belt comment is why I love commenter Bill, in a nutshell.


damnit. I had my money on bull-deity.

Titusbackintownok? said...

Sometimes men can get really big balls. I don't know what that is called but it is gross.

dannyboy said...

My mind is made up. I am a fag but that doesn't mean that I have to log the hog.

Where I come from you smoke fags and hog lovers are fairies except for those where hog isn't kosher but I digress. At least you know who you are and that's a damn fine start. The key to success in life is knowing who you are so you can tell the cabbie where you live when you're too drunk to walk home.

I bet some straight guys don't love pussy.

Well it depends on the cooter mate. I mean there are some lovely ones that are begging for attention and others that I wouldn't go near without a haz mat suit. Like Madonna's for instance. But I don't like em hairy either. Its like eating sushi on a barbershop floor.

reader_iam said...

Other versions of "Autumn Leaves" I enjoy, in addition to the Cassidy and the Evans which someone else linked, include those done by Keith Jarrett, Dizzy Gillespie, Chick Corea & Bobby McFerrin, and Cannonball Adderley. I get a kick out of the differences.

Ann Althouse said...

"Other than menopause and pregnancy is there anything that stops a woman from having her period?"

Anorexia.

Trooper York said...

Having sex with a woman when she is
having her period is called "crime scene sex."

I have a friend who is really into that. He has that yellow tape to put around the bed and everything.

Titusbackintownok? said...

When men are doing a woman can they tell if the vagina has been had by many?

I read that there are operations where women can get the cooters tighter.

Trooper York said...

When his girlfriend wants to come on to him she draws a chalk outline
on the bedspread.

Titusbackintownok? said...

"Having sex with a woman when she is
having her period is called "crime scene sex."

I have a friend who is really into that. He has that yellow tape to put around the bed and everything"

That is hilarious. Mad props to your friend Trooper. Total Respect.

Titusbackintownok? said...

Trooper it must be a bloody mess.

dannyboy said...

When men are doing a woman can they tell if the vagina has been had by many?

Certainly. I can tell by looking. There was this one chick in Seattle that I thought I would have to tie a board across my ass so I wouldn't fall in.

reader_iam said...

"Other than menopause and pregnancy is there anything that stops a woman from having her period?"

Anorexia.

Then there are those pills which limit the frequency of periods. Wasn't there some YouTube video that spoofed that? Didn't I see it posted in comments here at some point?

Titusbackintownok? said...

Would he actually eat her out?

That sounds really dangerous and unsafe and gross.

Or is it just the regular fucking?

How much blood is in a period?

Could it fill a pitcher that would hold fresh squeezed orange juice?

mcg said...

I'm having a little fun this morning.

Original George said...

"My Bed"

Tracey Enim

1998
Mattress, linens, pillows, objects
79 x 211 x 234 cm

Shown at the Tate, later sold for about $300,000.

mcg said...

Seems the beds of Tracy Enim and Titus have something in common.

dbp said...

If a woman is taking birth control pills she can choose types which allow her to have only 4 periods/year. In theory, she doesn't have to have any, but this has not really been tested.

Trooper York said...

All the guys at the bar didn't really want to hear the details. I mean this guy was always obessed with vampires and vampire movies and books and stuff so who knows if what he was saying was true.

But you would be surprised the women that would be fascinated and really into that stuff.

bill said...

Freeman Hunt said...
Re: dance belt

Oh my! Do the dancers have to wear those at every practice?


Depends on the school. A hardcore, classical ballet program will probably require them by the early teen years. By this time the skill level has increased where technical movements require storing the luggage in the overhead bin to avoid squashing and unsettling. Partnering also becomes more prevalent and with hormonally uncontrollable bodies colliding with girls wearing leotards measured by fractions of a millimeter, it would seem minimally prudent to provide some padding for the male.

Trooper York said...

Of course this in no way as disgusting as Loafing Oaf who is really into the Cleveland Steamer.

Now that's freaky.

reader_iam said...

OH.MI.GOSH.

Haven't found the spoof video I'm thinking of, but I did stumble upon this golden oldie of a sex ed video, a joint production of the Walt Disney and Kotex companies back in the '40s.

You should watch it, Titus.

(One of the more hilarious bits, near the end, is how posture, constipation and good grooming are brought into the topic.)

Titusbackintownok? said...

I would of handled all of the publicity much different if the candidates had mentioned Titus the homosexual rather than Joe the plumber last night.

So go with me here. I leave my fabulous lofe and Katie Couric and Diane Sawyer and Anderson Cooper immediately put microphones in my face. They would of reminded the viewers that they are at a trendy swanky part of town, in other words elite. I would of sauntered out with the rare clumbers and especially cute outfit and putting on my Jackie O sunglasses on would of said no commment. As they were running after me trying to get me to speak I would of been covering my face as well as the clumbers faces. I would of pleaded please leave me alone. I have nothing to say to you. Good day.

It would of been so dramatic and mysterious and exotic.

But my biggest fears would be that all of my tricks would of came out of the woodwork and been telling Katie and Campbell and Sean that I was a big dirty whore who never called them back.

My picture as well as the pictures of the rare clumbers would of been on the front page of the NY Post with some nasty headline about me being some big whore fag.

But I would of endured. Picked myself back up, held my head high and continue to work the runway.

reader_iam said...

Then there's this.

reader_iam said...

It's short.

Trooper York said...

Then there is the rumors about Maureen Dowd. They say that she broke up with the guy from the West Wing because he wouldn't give her the Hot Karl Rove the way she liked it.

Lawgiver said...

Reader,

The opening shot looks like a demonic cow's head.

Blob, blob, blob, blob,
blob, blob
blobblobblobbloblob

I will chew you up and spit you out you evil egg!

reader_iam said...

I would not want to be accused of sexism or engaging in discrimination, so: How Boys Grow, Part 1 and Part 2.

I forget: Now WHY did I go over to YouTube in the first place?

I swear that place is like smoking dope.

And what does any of this have to do with dead leaves?

LarsPorsena said...

AA:
"The Founding Fathers wore mantyhose."

..with puffy shirts (see Seinfeld), wigs, tricorner hats ,and pumps with big brass buckles.

Triangle Man said...

I learned a new word today and it sort of fits some themes in this thread: tribology

Trooper York said...

The greatest quarterback the New York Jets ever had was Joe Namath who was famous for wearing pantyhose.

Brett Favre is continuing that august tradition. Of course he is just wearing panties which is understandable after all that time he spent in Green Bay.

Chip Ahoy said...

I made the simplest sandwich I ever made. Ham and cheese.

I had tomato and onion and lettuce and avocado available but rejected them. Too messy.

But I did use mustard so poorly ground most of the seeds were still whole, and horseradish grated from a root Karen gave me. On sourdough bread made from a culture collected on Maui, which is an incredible place to collect sourdough culture. The culture sat dormant for two years in dry flake form and this was the first batch after being revived.

It was actually 1/2 sandwich and the cheese is two cheeses in one, aged cheddar with a blue cheese center. So although small and toothsome, it went BANG ! in my mouth.

Synova said...

"Other than menopause and pregnancy is there anything that stops a woman from having her period?"

Anorexia.


Basic training.

Synova said...

Not that it's really relevant to anything but the fear of, "Omg, how will I manage my period in boot camp."

Pogo said...

"Other than menopause and pregnancy is there anything that stops a woman from having her period?"

Long distance running.

Chip Ahoy said...

Run on sentences.

Pogo said...

When I was a kid, my mom used to make me walk three blocks to the store to buy tampons, maxipads, cigarettes, and Fiddle Faddle.

I had 4 older sisters.

I was oblivious to all but the Fiddle Faddle.

LarsPorsena said...

"Other than menopause and pregnancy is there anything that stops a woman from having her period?"

Anorexia.

Basic training."

Training period (no pun intended).
Most female long distance runners, swimmers, tri-athletes, go years without a normal period. Mother Nature shuts down the egg factory when the body is under to much stress. Extreme female athletes don't worry about periods.

Chip Ahoy said...

Once a woman visited at my house. She went directly to the bathroom. I didn't think anything about it because other women did that too, presumably to adjust their hair after removing their hats. Or so I was told. Within the span of a minute, my Belgian Groenendale comes prancing into the living room proudly carrying a kotex in her mouth.

"Oh you silly girl, drop that!"

*chase*

bill said...

Mother Nature shuts down the egg factory when the body is under to much stress.

Also low body fat, which you get from both anorexia and extreme training.

Sy said...

Polls are tightening. The two most accurate polls in 2004 has the race at 3 or 4 points for Obama

IB/TIPP
45-42 Obama

Ras
50-46 Obama

To top it off:
Gallup LV
49-47

Indeed, the race is tightening and Obama can't close the deal.

BJK said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bq-eeWow_WU

(Jobs aren't a 4-letter word in the Obama-Biden campaign.)

chuck b. said...

"I voted yesterday, it felt good. It felt REAL good. I was proud to vote against every incumbent. That meant I voted for two Democrats. I did so proudly."

I live in Nancy Pelosi's district. Should I vote for Cindy Sheehan? I've been wondering.

Trooper York said...

I voted for Kenley, but ACORN registered Tim Gunn twenty five times so I got out voted.

reader_iam said...

Trooper: Hmmmm. Maybe I'll have to rethink my disapproval of ACORN's business plan after all.

chuck b. said...

I was appalled they pulled in Tim Gunn as a judge last night.

They're in frickin' New York. Call anyone. Rachel Zoe was there in the front row. They could have used her.

reader_iam said...

chuck b.: Oh, go for it, and wear mantyhose under your voting attire while you're at it. Life's too short not to have a little bit of fun when you can.

Trooper York said...

Kenley was be far and away the best designer if you were interested in having stuff you could actually sell. Which is not what these fashion douchebags are worried about. I would be happy to carry Kenley's designs in my store.

And to say that she "copied" other people. What a crock of shit. That's the whole basis of fashion. Ripping off other people. What a bunch of nincampoops.

chuck b. said...

I saw her (Cindy) downtown a few weeks ago. She had a bullhorn and was shouting "Economics for the people!"

I had a super-awesome laugh.

Triangle Man said...

Blogger Sy said...

To top it off:
Gallup LV
49-47



It is tighter today, but those are the numbers for Gallup's "likely voters(traditional)" group, which excludes new registrants. Their "likely voters(expanded)" numbers are 51 - 45. Maybe ACORN is involved?

chuck b. said...

I liked Kenley's stuff too. I liked looking at it, I should say. My reaction to it was ambivalent, but I really liked to look at it.

I thought Leanne's petals were horrocious.

Trooper York said...

And that Rachel Zoe is another one. After our horrible experiances with stylists and watching her reality show, we will never send stuff to stylist ever again. If the clients want to shop let them come to the store. They are not better than anyone else.

Original George said...

Yet another smart city person tells us what to think. Dick Morris sums it up with this thumbsucker:

"The constants of the debate remained. Obama is smoother, prettier, younger and more presidential."

Smooth, pretty, and young looking. We're electing a depilatory.

And in NY Magazine....

"Obama’s million-dollar smile and McCain’s dime-store grimace....

"McCain is grumpy cum irascible cum splenetic....It’s interesting to contemplate whether Obama would have fared as well against a different kind of opponent: a younger, sunnier, highly composed, pretty-boy egghead — Mitt Romney, say..."

Sounds like the GOP should have run a 14-year-old girl. Miley Cyrus.

The brainwashing is nearly complete. The TV age cannot come to an end soon enough.

chuck b. said...

I enjoy Rachel Zoe's reality show. (I just accdientally typed "reality shoe"). I think all the Los Angeles-based reality shows are the best. The Hills is blows my mind.

LA gives the best reality.

Trooper York said...

Hey they are supposedly filming that MTV show where they all live in a house here in Carroll Gardens.
I forget the name of it. Not big brother, the other one.

Triangle Man said...

I forget the name of it. Not big brother, the other one

The Real World?

Trooper York said...

Yeah thats the one. It used to have that skeevy guy who rode a bike, what was his name Shmuck or something like that.

Anyway they supposedly rented a space in Brooklyn but I haven't seen any evidence of that so who knows.

ElcubanitoKC said...

Hey, all, the naturalization ceremony was awesome. I've been updating a lot of stuff today, so I've been running from one government building to the next. I changed my name, so now I have had to change a ton of stuff. I'm dead tired, and now I am off to a wedding dinner rehearsal. Just thought some of you may care to read about this.

See y'all late.

Sy said...

New Drudge Headline:

GALLUP SHOCK: 49 OBAMA, 47 MCCAIN WITH LIKELY VOTERS

I refuse to believe the new model. They depend on young voters. Someone used to say(paraphrasing)

There is a word for politician who depends on young voters: LOSER.

Triangle Man said...

It looks like you are right Trooper:

MTV Confirms The Real World: Brooklyn

I'm sorry for your loss.

ElcubanitoKC said...

Quick question, to those who have registered to vote: Do they usually ask you if you would like to register under a specific party affiliation or independent?

They didn't ask me today, and I just remembered.

Hm...

Trooper York said...

Thanks Triangle man.

I hope some of the girls come into my shop. Maybe I can dress them so they look hot. Or sell them some nice handbags that they can beat each other over the head with in the opening credits. That would be cool.

Simon said...

Titusbackintownok? said...
"Can women have sex during their period? Do they want to? Do men want to?"

Yes, some, and yes, respectively.

Lem said...

Quick question, to those who have registered to vote: Do they usually ask you if you would like to register under a specific party affiliation or independent?

I registered as an independent to make sure my vote counted.

My head says McCain is going to lose, but in my gut I know he is not.

Chet said...

REASONS FOR THE NEW GALLOP NUMBERS:


1. "My friend Warren Buffett..."

-and-

2. "Ten years" to Energy Independence.

It doesn't take 10 years to build a pipeline. Palin did it in two.

Democrats aren't interested in Energy Independence or fixing the economy, only prolonging it so they can stay in office !

Lem said...

I saw a couple wearing McCain Palin hats at the Port Authority Bus terminal today.

I wanted to say hellow - but you dont do that in NYC.

Ron said...

Trooper, I have an autographed ball from Tom Tresh that I got from him outside of Tiger Stadium after a game... which I now can't find!

Pogo said...

Trooper,

Try to get Puck back on Real World NYC; he must be 40 by now. he deserves to be beaten to a mushy consistency.

maybe Lee Lee’s Valise could sell the handbags, and fill them with bricks.

Lem said...

When Benjamin Franklin was dispatched to France as ambassador of the United States in 1776, he won the hearts of the French through his authenticity. Rather than take on an affected and phony continental style, Franklin eschewed the powdered wig of the European gentleman and donned the fur cap of an American frontiersman. Original genius and polymath, Franklin understood that the French would see through any false pretension but respect an authenticity that sprang from an unpretentious and naive love of country.

What a contrast there is between Franklin and Barack Obama. Obama is a Harvard lawyer who is a mile wide and an inch deep. He is only the latest in a long line of shallow elites that consider it stylish and intellectual to despise their own culture and heritage.


http://tinyurl.com/4wlf6r

Darcy said...

Great to hear, EKC!

Interesting discussion here. :)

And why don't you do that in NYC, Lem?

No wonder NYers look at me funny when I start chatting them up! LOL.
But I haven't been snubbed yet.

Ok, once. By a lady working for the LIRR. But I think she was just having a bad day.

Lem said...

And why don't you do that in NYC, Lem?

I think it has to do with the proximity people have btwg each other.

got to go...

Darcy said...

And I had to look up a recipe for curried creamd eggs! Oh...yum!

Methadras said...

Titusbackintownok? said...

Would he actually eat her out?

That sounds really dangerous and unsafe and gross.


It's called getting your wings. I'll let figure out how that happens.

Triangle Man said...

darcy said...
...
Ok, once. By a lady working for the LIRR. But I think she was just having a bad day.


Maybe it was a consequence of her disability?

JAL said...

ElcubanitoinKC -- I was thinking of you this morning at 8:29 your time. Congrats again.

So happy for you. :-)

Sorry our election is looking like a bad day in Havanna -- but you seem to have the hang of it otherwise.

Just be careful if Obama is elected not to get caught on TV questioning His Royal Highness. His minions will have no problem violating your everyday privacy, while making a full court press of ad hominem. (I think that's the kind of "power" taught at the Industrial Areas Foundation where HHBO trained.) Of course the claim is "We learn about the richness of other racial and ethnic and religious in an environment of mutual respect and regard."

So much for mutual respect and regard for Joe the Plumber.

Darcy said...

Wow, Triangle Man. I started reading that thinking they must have tough jobs. I'm not saying that it's an easy job, but what the heck is up with that?

blake said...

Hmmmm. How many more people y'all suppose are gonna drop by to let us know that "Joe The Plumber" is Charles Keating's 4th cousin twice-removed?

It would be more effective if they could find a Sith Lord/Padawan relationship between Karl Rove and Joe W.

That would explain his ability to make Obama say he wanted to "spread the wealth".

What I don't get is, since that's very clearly the plan--nay, the platform of the Democratic party--why deny it? Hell, a lot of people seem to go for that sort of thing.

Fred Drinkwater said...

How to tell a socialist prevaricator with one simple monosyllable:

They say spread "the wealth".

Honest people say "your wealth".

Titusbackintownok? said...

"Did I ever mention, by the way, that whenever I see teevee footage of crowds chanting "Drill now! Drill now! Drill now!", I always think of Titus?"

That is so sweet Reader. I am truly honored.

Titusbackintownok? said...

I have a funny story.

When I was a kid I had a "kid garage sale"-which I thought was a kind of cool idea.

It was all of my old toys which I didnt use anymore.

I had a fake case register and everything.

Anyways, I went into my mom's closet and pulled out her big tampon bag where she had all these little blue bags. I thought they would be cute to use to bag the neighbor kids purchases.

So I did. Whenever anyone bought something I would use my mom's blue tampon bags to bag the toy.

So all over my neighborhood the other kids were running around with my tampon bags.

One of the neighbor moms (who was a bitch) came over and told my mom.

Titusbackintownok? said...

I also have a picture of myself and my sister on Christmas in like 1980 or 81. I was 8 or 9 and my sister was 15.

The picture is of my sister with an AC/DC album and myself with a Donna Summer album.

I guess that was a forshadowing of things to come.

My sister is not a dyke though-I meant about myself.

ElcubanitoKC said...

JAL, thanks! A very bad day in the US (at least until know) has always seemed like a great day in Havana.

I saw what they did to Joe the Plumber, seriously messed up. If it had been the other way around, people would be screaming about their First Amendment rights being violated even if did not apply.

Ann Althouse said...

Congratulations, ElcubanitoKC.