August 26, 2016

"Totally selfishly, [sex] is so much better for me being jacked because you feel so much more confident and you see yourself as this much more sexual person, which is really fun."

Said the actor John Krasinski, who is married to Emily Blunt:
“The truth is, she really is that person who would like me anyway. But I don’t think she’s going to kick the eight-pack abs out of bed,” he said.
But it's for him, he's doing it "totally selfishly," he says, to make himself "feel so much more confident" and to see himself "as this much more sexual person, which is really fun." He's talking like a woman in a TV commercial for hair dye... in the 1970s.

So weird! And look at him. He's hypermasculinized — more muscular definition than any manly labor or team sport would ever produce. But he's delivering the kind of lines that were — for propagandistic purposes — traditionally assigned to women. Who talks about becoming a "much more sexual person"? It sounds so silly next to "being jacked," which sounds silly anyway.

Don't get me wrong. I don't want to discourage men from working out, looking good, and having abs, and I guess it's good to believe that you do it for yourself and not for your wife and that she'd "like [you] anyway." Something about talking about it though. The potential for sounding inane is high. Hearing a man say it helps see why it's also inane for a woman to say it.

I do it for me.

IN THE COMMENTS: I'm getting challenged. I'm told to Google "best NFL abs," so: here. Now, I don't know if Steve Weatherford got that way from playing football or whether he did targeted ab exercises. And I don't know how much Photoshopping went into that photograph. But, nice going, Steve.

61 comments:

AprilApple said...

LOL. I like the layer photograph of a smiling Emily... see bubble caption "yes it is!"

Curious George said...

"So weird! And look at him. He's hypermasculinized — more muscular definition than any manly labor or team sport would ever produce."

Hardly. Look at the guys in the NFL.

Bill, Republic of Texas said...

That was confusing. I don't think he and I use the word "jacked" in the same way.

Ignorance is Bliss said...

Curious George said...

Hardly. Look at the guys in the NFL.

The guys in the NFL have more muscles, but not as sharply defined because they have a healthy layer of body fat over it. To get that definition you need unhealthily low body fat.

Virgil Hilts said...

"more muscular definition than any manly labor or team sport would ever produce". Um, you need to do a gis for "NFL wide receivers shirtless."

MayBee said...

" The guys in the NFL have more muscles, but not as sharply defined because they have a healthy layer of body fat over it. "

Not the ones I've been looking at.

MayBee said...

Besides, if you read the blurb, he was big like the picture to play a navy seal, isn't that big any more.

Virgil Hilts said...

I was trying to think of an NFL receiver that does not look more ripped and defined than this actor. So far I've come up with Cole Beasley.

Darrell said...

I was 90% of his level of body definition for a big chunk of my life, and all women ever said is that it made them feel bad about their own bodies. The thrill (if there was one) wore off after they showed all their female friends.

MadisonMan said...

@Bill: LOL. Yes. Exactly.

I don't care to read about any married couple's bedroom (or elsewhere ;) ) relationship. Not my business.

Birkel said...

As long as they are both happy, one with the other, why the ever loving fuck does anybody care what matters inside some distant relationship?

Carol said...

Probably had some chemical help, for professional reasons of course. PEDs will "jack" you up too.


rhhardin said...

Bike commuting bulks you up like that.

Curious George said...

Krasinski was a lot less creepy when he was "Jim."

EDH said...

Meredith Baxter-Birney and all the L'oreal commercials were about the model and the product being "worth it" because it made others want what they have. A power over others, either desire in men or envy in women (MB-B's later-revealed lesbianism notwithstanding, of course).

Krasinski seems to be saying it's for his own satisfaction.

traditionalguy said...

Self image matters more to younger folks still into seducing others as a sport. Winning is important. But one day that's over. It's the next generations' turn

Hint: Free weights are the answer to everything.

William said...

I watch my diet and go to the gymn with fair regularity. I do this not because I want to jack my appearance but because I'm old and want to live forever--or, anyway, be healthy until I die. I think my motivation is far more pathetic than that of Krasinski.

Expat(ish) said...

I lost a lot of weight a few years ago, about 80 lbs. Got back to w/i 15 lbs of my high school track weight, but with 25 years of intermittent weight lifting bulk on top of it. I looked pretty dang fine for a ~50 year old.

My wife wanted me to gain 10 lbs because I had "saggy old man muscle butt."

Twue wuve.

_XC

TreeJoe said...

I certainly understand this sentiment as a near middle aged man who has gone through some rough body changes (for me) with kids and a stressful job.

And as a former fitness/exercise professional, the following types of sentiments are incorrect, "The guys in the NFL have more muscles, but not as sharply defined because they have a healthy layer of body fat over it. To get that definition you need unhealthily low body fat."

"You don't get that level of fitness from physical labor or team sports"

Both of those statements are incorrect in many ways. First, his body fat is not unhealthy. Unhealthy body fat shows up usually alongside extreme vascularity - but "Jim" isn't showing that level of fat loss between the skin and veins.

Second, you get that type of body from a combination of intense training and, in many cases, specific eating. Olympic and non-olympic but hardcore training men often achieve similar physiques. Some men have such physiques with barely any training, and some men will not achieve such physiques despite being intensely trained.

That is not hyper-masculinized except in the context of a society where most men do not significantly exert themselves routinely.

David said...

I am far more interested in Emily Blunt.

rhhardin said...

Emily Blunt was in a DVD I watched just the other day, a groundhog day sort of sci-fi premise Live Die Repeat. They could have done the last scene a little further to show her moment of understanding, making the whole thing a metaphor for courtship.

Otherwise a generic actress. It's nice to hear of actresses that stay married, though. Assuming she has.

Levi Starks said...

After 2 years of training (initiated by my wife's remark about my gut) I'm maybe in better shape than I was nearly 40 years ago after completing bootcamp.
And I do in fact feel very good.
My wife now says I look fine, and don't need to lose anymore fat from my waist.
But I'm not so sure.....
So it's off to the gym.

JCC said...

Subjectively, I think sex may be better when you're in shape, just as it probably seems better when your partner is looking fit too. Not to suggest there is really "bad" sex with a SO, but one cannot help but feel more...what? Not smug, confident? But perhaps liking the sense of being no longer fat, or flabby or whatever. And feelings do not change (all that much, but probably some) when your partner is fat or flabby, since we all make allowances for body issues, but it's somehow just a bit better when your SO is looking good.

Maybe this has to do with the preliminaries, when you're looking at your partner and something strikes you. Could be the clothes, or the attitude, or the body too. Maybe the body especially sometimes...

So maybe the subject of the article is just saying what many believe but don't say, for fear of offending the other party, or sounding like a self-centered jerk.

bagoh20 said...

"I do it for me."

It's just the truth when men OR women say it. Women pretend that they don't care if men like it or not when we call them out on the hours of make up and obsession with clothes that accentuate sexuality. They do it to attract men, which of course feels good to them, so they do it for themselves.

Men of course do it for the same reasons, but pretend less about why. Men however do often pretend that the flaunting of the their sexuality is accidental, which is bullshit. Every guy with a cut hard body knows exactly what he's doing when he goes shirtless. He thinks about doing it with every rep at the gym.

And who can deny the extra pleasure you take in having sex when you are in what you consider great shape, and the distraction it is when you or your partner are self-conscious about not looking your best. I say don't do that. Always imagine you look great, you will enjoy yourself more and so will your partner.

It's Friday, and I'm so fucking hot! Just turn out the lights, and I'll show you.

Marc Puckett said...

The advertisement below the post reads, "Trainers despise him. Religious leaders are demanding that this fat loss trick be banned!" I was tempted to click through but resisted.

damikesc said...

"she loves me for me"

Yeah. If you weren't a wealthy and successful actor, I bet you'd be nailing Emily Blunt. Common occurrence.

And, yeah, you can find any of a large number of athletes more cut than he. He is in good shape, but NFL RB, WR, and DB, MMA fighters, WWE wrestlers --- all tend to be dramatically more cut than he.

Ann Althouse said...

"Hardly. Look at the guys in the NFL."

Show me a photograph of the exposed torso of an NFL player who has that kind of ab definition from playing the sport as opposed to doing exercises targeted at ab definition.

Really. I'd like to see the photographs.

Ann Althouse said...

"The guys in the NFL have more muscles, but not as sharply defined because they have a healthy layer of body fat over it. To get that definition you need unhealthily low body fat."

I read that after making my comment. Thanks. That's what I thought.

Amexpat said...

Most likely he's doing it for his acting career. Hunky male leads get more money than out of shape supporting actors

Ann Althouse said...

"I was 90% of his level of body definition for a big chunk of my life, and all women ever said is that it made them feel bad about their own bodies. The thrill (if there was one) wore off after they showed all their female friends."

Were you drawn to unathletic women for some reason? Or maybe these women wanted some help getting to look as good as you did. Why didn't you try to use your great body to get a woman who had an equally great body?

Let me guess: These women did have great bodies, but they were vulnerable on self-esteem and your great body was perversely hurting their self-esteem, such that it would be a kindness to them if you would pudge up a bit and lose some definition.

Curious George said...

"Ann Althouse said...
"Hardly. Look at the guys in the NFL."

Show me a photograph of the exposed torso of an NFL player who has that kind of ab definition from playing the sport as opposed to doing exercises targeted at ab definition.

Really. I'd like to see the photographs."


Google: best nfl abs

Ann Althouse said...

Thanks for the experienced detail, Tree Joe.

Ann Althouse said...

"Most likely he's doing it for his acting career."

I agree. The big male stars have to be super-hero material.

Male and female stars now look like they were drawn for a comic book.

rhhardin said...

I've found, having been watching romcom and action DVDs for a couple years, that I get much better movies if I just rewatch old ones that I've forgotten rather than watching new ones, as far as odds of having to bail out early go.

The plot situation I look for is antagonistic opposites are found to fit; action flicks sometimes arrange a forced togetherness that does that.

But recent flicks are just too PC to admit that situation can exist at all, rather than its representing sexual difference itself.

MayBee said...

Athletes do exercises to increase the muscle performance they need for the sport. They don't just play the sport to stay in shape.
Sting abs help you jump, stand, twist, run...all the things you need for the sport.
So it's a distinction without a difference.

rhhardin said...

Antagonistic opposites are found to fit could go under grace.

TreeJoe said...

Michelangelo's David was pretty ripped. And by all recollection, Greek Athletes as a group were pretty much in similar shape. Their musculature may have looked different simply as a function of using different training techniques, but they were both muscular and "cut."

Lastly,look into the CrossFit or similar movements. There may be some significant ahhh....recreational....drug usage there, but there's also alot of desk jockeys who are getting up at 5am and doing some very advanced training techniques that are developing really impressive muscular.

buwaya puti said...

My wife liked me for my legs.
So theres that too.

Fernandinande said...

Here's what he really looks like.

Curious George said...

"Now, I don't know if Steve Weatherford got that way from playing football or whether he did targeted ab exercises"

You don't that way from playing football, you get that way from TRAINING to play football. And all sports now focus on core strength. All. Including golfers.

rhhardin said...

Scythe your lawn and do errands on a bicycle instead of in a car and you'll be fine.

Curious George said...

If you want to see athlete's with amazing abs and physiques, gymnasts. And they do no weight training. FOr the most part they get they way they get from doing the sport. Lifting themselves.

walter said...

You go guy.
Because..you're worth it.

Titus said...

His reason for getting "jacked" is common. First, you want to have sex with other jacked/in shape peeps. Second, you do feel much more confident in bed. Lastly, working out makes my ejaculation more intense.

Try it-you will like it!

tits.

CStanley said...

He's being honest, which is good, but there's also a humble-bragging about it. He wants us to know that he is not only hot, but also a great guy whose marriage isn't superficial. He and Emily aren't shallow, they're just having fun with this. Which is all fine and good too, I guess (hopefully the part he left unsaid, whether he will still love Emily for herself as she loses her youthful good looks, is true also.)

As for whether you do it for yourself or for your partner....meh, that's like the philosophical argument that altruism doesnt exist because we really do good in order to feel good about ourselves. It's like trying to find the beginning and end of a circle....pointless.

Paul Snively said...

Pursuant to CStanley's comment, confidence is sexy, and that's also circular. That is, self-confidence is sexy, and if you feel self-confident and it makes you feel sexier, chances are you will be sexier to others.

This reminds me of a kind of interesting arc (to me, anyway) about Anne Hathaway as Catwoman in "The Dark Knight Rises." When I first heard about the casting, I thought, gee, I dunno. Anne Hathaway as Selena Kyle, sure. Anne Hathaway as Catwoman? Isn't she a bit too girl-next-door? Then I actually saw the film, and she completely nailed it. But apparently Anne Hathaway has somewhat similar feelings as I originally did, because in an interview talking about the role, she had to fight back tears thinking about the character, because, as she said, she would like to "tap into that level of confidence." She performed as a character she wound up wanting to be more like, in some respects, one of those respects being self-confidence. I was charmed by that. Too bad I can't find the original video now.

Leeatmg said...

I think perhaps you underestimate how strongly a person with low self esteem feels when they do something that improves their self confidence. Speaking from experience, there can be a level of overcompensation in that area. If one never felt particularly desirable in the first place, the sudden acquisition of "desirability" as society defines it can be intoxicating, especially when it comes from one's own hard work.

John Scott said...

I can only think of two sports where the athletes gain muscle just by participating in them: Swimming and gymnastics. Football players are all muscular, but I would say most wouldn't be defined as "ripped."

I'm in my late 50s, but because of genetics and the fact that I go to the gym 5-6 days a week I still have a six pack. I started going to the gym for a number of reasons, but mostly for two: to have visible muscles to intimidate my daughter's boyfriends, and to make myself more attractive to my wife. Well, my daughter has been too absorbed in her school work to date. And on the second front? Well, I'll just advise the actor to get it while he can.

walter said...

Blogger Darrell said...
I was 90% of his level of body definition for a big chunk of my life, and all women ever said is that it made them feel bad about their own bodies.
--
"Does this man make me look fat?"

dbp said...

John Scott said...

I can only think of two sports where the athletes gain muscle just by participating in them: Swimming and gymnastics.

What about the sport of weightlifting? Sure, it may have been invented as a training aid for other sports but like most things, it has become a competitive sport on its own. The heavyweight lifters have a lot of flab under their muscles, but if you look at weight divisions, they are all very cut and defined.

Unknown said...

Ok, you ladies wanted men to talk more? This is why we don't talk so much. Our true thoughts are idiotic and even we know it, so we don't talk so much. Talk about our feelings? The feeling of being a muscular stud is not only unseemly to talk about but women don't understand. You ladies don't really want us to talk about our feelings, you want us to talk about your feelings.

John Scott said...

dbp,

The omission wasn't because I don't consider weight lifting (power or olympic) a sport. I just thought it obvious enough to go without saying.

Bremen65 said...

Steve Weatherford is, of course, a punter...

CStanley said...

LOL unknown

tim maguire said...

Hard to believe that's the dude from The Office. He probably said "jacked" because he got famous playing the ultimate beta male and "jacked" is a totally beta male thing to say.

walter said...

Unknown said...You ladies don't really want us to talk about our feelings, you want us to talk about your feelings.
--
More like agree with/echo your feelings.

Michael Fitzgerald said...

walter said..."Does this man make me look fat?"

8/26/16, 1:41 PM

LOL! Good one, Walter!

Lloyd W. Robertson said...

I'm thinking that love-making may be like economics: the major performance measures depend on confidence. Sometimes it seems mysterious: a person who seemed very confidence, loses confidence; a wall-flower blooms or (to mix metaphors further) becomes a lion. Some may think there is a science of how to build and maintain confidence, but I doubt it.

Jonathan Graehl said...

for me it makes sense. if a man thinks he would have a hard time replacing his woman (and there are no kids), then he *probably* can't pull off the iron confidence/leadership-in-the-bedroom-at-least that women crave. if he *can*, then he's probably fine. whether that or (likely supplementary-testosterone aided) 8-pack abs is easier to pull off is up to you.

Urban B said...

I gotta say... For people confused by this, you're not going to get it until you take a few months, get strict on the diet, and do the requisite work. Then you'll understand the confidence that comes from physical transformation. But it isn't limited to just getting in shape. Accomplishment of any kind can create this kind of boost. But considering men are more visually stimulated, and all human beings suffer from some sense of solipsism, looking better is likely to make you feel better.

This isn't rocket science, folks. It's pretty basic and near universal stuff.

Martin said...

Either Emily Blunt is REALLY weird, or that marriage doesn't last very long.