A man who once served as a juror in Thompson's court testified that he never saw the device, but figured out what it was based on movies he had seen.
The comment sent sidelong glances through the courtroom.
"It sounded like a penis pump to me," Daniel Greenwood testified. He said he had seen such devices in "Austin Powers" and "Dead Man on Campus."
Dr. S. Edward Dakil, a urologist called as an expert witness, ... defended use of the device after defense attorney Clark Brewster said it was an out-of-date treatment for erectile dysfunction.
"I still use those," Dakil testified.
Brewster paused.
"Not you, personally?" he asked.
"No," Dakil responded as jurors laughed. "I recommend those as a urologist."
ADDED: Don't you think it helps the defense that the jurors keep cracking up? If you were the defendant's lawyer would you have a strategy to get them laughing? If you were the judge -- the judge-judge, not the defendant-judge -- would you suspect there was a strategy to make the jurors laugh? Would you do something about it?
UPDATE: Despite the hilarity, the jury convicted the judge (and recommended a one year sentence on each of the four counts).
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32 comments:
Uh, Dave? One doesn't get "high" in Viagra.
Ann, the link is busted.
Here's another one with the usual Brit snarky headline.
Broken link fixed. Temptation to make penis joke resisted.
They will rise to the occasion and be objective about it I'm sure - most juries do.
Brings to mind the old Laugh-In catchphrase ending in "...da judge."
What options would the judge-judge have if he suspected laughter being employed by the defense? Nothing like an authority figure declaring "NO LAUGHING ALLOWED!" to prompt snickers and guffaws, right? At least, that's how I remember it from grade school.
At least the judge didn't bore the jury.
She testified that during a trial in 2002, she heard the pump during the emotional testimony of a murdered toddler's grandfather.
The grandfather "was getting real teary-eyed, and the judge was up there pumping on that pump," she said.
Silliness aside, this bit is pretty creepy.
Creepy, but is it criminal? The charge is "indecent exposure." Reading the article again, I still don't understand how that occured. What is it that would need to be indecently exposed -- the pump or the penis? The penis, I presume.
"We Know We Belong to the Gland, and the Gland We Belong to is Grand, O-O-O-Oklahoma...."
(apologies to Rodgers & Hammerstein)
Okay, fire the man. Take his pension. But 40 years? 40 years??
Does the fact that he's a judge make this kind of sentence more reasonable? Too bad we can't put actual pedophiles in prison that long.
"Temptation to make penis joke resisted."
Uh, Ann, the whole post is a penis joke. You didn't resist any temptation.
In fact, I'm seriously doubting that you were ever the rebel you claimed to have been in high school. It's the childhood goodie-goodies who find the need to post this kind of stuff as adults.
VW: grwup
AJD needs a jealousy enema.
No realtionship to the topic here intended, of course.
DMC: Thanks for the link. It was quite gross. Interesting about the juror witnesses, saying that he was constantly looking down and one guessed that he was playing video games and the other that he was tying fishing flies.
I'm sure the judge won't get four 10 year sentences to serve consecutively. He's getting what he deserves just going through the humiliation of this trial.
Lately the liberal sense of humor seems to begin and end with GWB slipping on a banana peel.
AJD said..."Uh, Ann, the whole post is a penis joke. You didn't resist any temptation. In fact, I'm seriously doubting that you were ever the rebel you claimed to have been in high school. It's the childhood goodie-goodies who find the need to post this kind of stuff as adults."
Guilty as charged by a ridiculous, sanctimonious prig.
World's thinnest book:
"The Wit & Wisdom of The American Left".
I don't want to sound too gross, but aren't "penis enlargers" just a different term for "masturbation sleeves?" Was this guy not just touching himself, but also pleasuring himself while in court?
Ewww...
Guess the accused is no student of Judge Learned Hand, huh?
>What is a penis pump supposed to >do, anyway?
First off, let me explain that I know this FROM THE INTERNET, not from any personal experience.
It's a tube that creates a sealed vacuum. And squishy bits inserted will expand like a baloon due to the lower air pressure. Yay erection.
The reason these things are scams is that the minute it's removed, everything flops back to normal unless you can keep it up normally.
Some people can masturbate with them in a way, by increasing and decreasing the pressure.
And whatever you do, DON'T do an unfiltered search for "Extreme Pumpers."
Ann, anything new going on at that 'inhabited' Frat House ?????
:)
Peace, Maxine
And whatever you do, DON'T do an unfiltered search for "Extreme Pumpers."
gosh, thanks for the warning!
Oh come on knoxgirl, you KNOW you were gonna.
"First off, let me explain that I know this FROM THE INTERNET, not from any personal experience."--Fatmouse
I'm tech illiterate and don't know how to block junkmail and spam on in my email account...
.....so I've gotten quite an education on these matters well before this trial.
Wish someone would help me block junk mail from my email account.
Peace, Maxine
To your question: Yes I think a laughing jury is less likely to be as punitive. Perhaps the Judge is enjoying the penis jokes as much as everyone here.
Meade:
"Creepy, but is it criminal? The charge is "indecent exposure." Reading the article again, I still don't understand how that occured. What is it that would need to be indecently exposed -- the pump or the penis? The penis, I presume."
So would that mean if he had a person hidden under his desk & robes that would be okay, too, as long as nothing was "exposed"?
Fox just reported the verdick. Guilty on all four counts. No wiggle room for the judge.
"Verdick"? That's so cruel.
crime doesn't pay
Well, *I* did do an unfiltered search, and, I now know more about these things than I ever imagined.
Apparently, it depends on which model you get. Some create the seal to make the erection, whereas others can be used for self-pleasuring. There are various inserts for them to simulate various stimulations.
So, they're like Kitchen Aid food mixers - you can get the pasta maker attachment, the bread hook, the whisk, the sausage grinder...
Wouldn't masturbation in a court room be a much more serious offense? The guy might have gotten off easy.
(two puns in four paragraphs...)
Where is the "40 years" coming from? I read "a one year sentence on each of the four counts" - isn't that four years?
DaveG: Read the article at the first link:
"Thompson, 59, is charged with four counts of indecent exposure, each punishable by up to 10 years in prison."
Oops, my bad. I was exercising my 20-20 hindsight based on the later update. Burned by RTFA again! :)
The jury recommendation seems more in line with a fair punishment - 40 years does seem very harsh.
Dr. Melissa :
So would that mean if he had a person hidden under his desk & robes that would be okay, too, as long as nothing was "exposed"?
Didn't mean to suggest that what he did was okay, any more than it would be appropriate for a female judge to be pleasuring herself with a concealed vibrator when she should be giving her full attention to a witness giving testimony.
I was wondering where the crime would be if his penis had never been exposed. Is it a crime to masturbate in public if no one can detect what you're doing. Today's article says his court reporter testified that she saw Thompson expose himself 15 times. Apparently, that was what led the not-so-amused jury to stifle their laughter long enough to convict.
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