April 27, 2013

"Daddy, remember that time we died?"

From the Reddit page devoted to "the creepiest thing your young child has ever said to you."

ADDED: "I want to peel all your skin off"... "what do you see through the black circles in my eyes when you're controlling me when I'm at school?"

AND: "When I was about 3 we had a cat that had still born kittens. I asked my father if we could make crosses for them, which he did. As he was making them I asked: 'aren't those too small?' Dad: 'What do you mean?' Me: 'aren't we going to nail them to them?' Dad: (after several moments silence) 'we're not going to do that' Me: 'oh.'"

AND: Then there's the 3- or 4-year-old who called his dad a "demented peon" and the 5-year-old who called her mother a "glassy-eyed, slack-jawed troglodyte!" (Rude... but admirable vocabulary.)

22 comments:

CEO-MMP said...

Wasn't exactly my kid (well, he was but not biologically) but when he was 3 one morning he told a very detailed story of the woman who'd been in his room and sat on his bed that wasn't mommy. He told the story to several people, and it was always the same.

Oddly enough, the woman that had lived (and died) in the house 2 owners before had gone a little loony after her husband passed and would be seen pacing through the night, holding a candle or kerosene lantern, and that room was the room she spent her days in (she became nocturnal as part of her craziness and slept the day away).

Not particularly creepy unless you're afraid of that sort of thing, but odd.

Coketown said...

These all sound made-up. Reddit should stick to witch hunts.

madAsHell said...

"what do you see through the black circles in my eyes when you're controlling me when I'm at school?"

Being John Malkovick?

jr565 said...

She Said
I know what it's like to be dead
I know what it is to be sad
And you're making me feel like I've never been born.

lincolntf said...

When I was about 6 years old, my parents heard me tell my brother I was going to "shiv him", as in stab him with a prison-made weapon. My mother very solemnly asked me "where did you hear that word?", and I showed her the Spider Man comic I was reading. Big sighs of relief all around.

edutcher said...

There was one years ago about the little girl describing her parents' party and how "Daddy rushed at the ladies to take their clothes off".

Deb said...

CEO:
When she was three, my younger daughter had an imaginary playmate she referred to as 'Joanne" which gave me pause because that was the name of a close friend who had died when my daughter was a year old. We never called her Joanne, but Jo; however, Joanne was actually her name. I know lots of kids have imaginary playmates but the name was just really coincidental... or was it? ;-)

kentuckyliz said...

Me at 4 having lunch at the kitchen table with Mom, with the radio news on in the background: "Mommy, what's a race riot?"

Still as a young child while our family was visiting some family friends in the Detroit area: "What does rape mean?"

Honest questions. What do you tell a little girl about these things? I don't remember the answers or non-answers. I guess I remember these moments because of the uncomfortable reaction.

lincolntf said...

My mother remembers me sitting at the breakfast table in a house we moved out of when I was 4, angrily asking her "Who is killing the gorillas"? Apparently some "guerrillas" were in the News that day, I don't remember it.

Darrell said...

aren't we going to nail them to them?

Keep a close eye on that kid.

I Have Misplaced My Pants said...

Rape is carnal knowledge of a woman by force and without her consent.

William said...

Mom, do you have to bury the body parts as deep as the body.

Nonapod said...

Not really creepy, but (after watching old B&W TV shows and photos) my older sister apparently said "Life must have been really sad when everything was black and white."

Palladian said...

Danny isn't here, Mrs Torrance.

Tom said...

At 4 years old, I called my grandma a "fish-eyed ole' fool." That ended me watching any more Sandford & Son.

The Godfather said...

Can we agree that several of the people quoted on Reddit should not be allowed to purchase firearms?

tiger said...

Thanks Professor.

I just spent the past 3+ hours reading the thread.

Funny with the added benefit of being creepy.

carrie said...

"Mom,I wonder what human tastes like."

carrie said...

"Mom,I wonder what human tastes like."

R.A. Crankbait said...

When I was out of town my oldest (and at the time, only) daugther would crawl into bed with my wife and sleep there. She also talked in her sleep, and enunciated very well.

One night when she was four she woke my wife up with the declaration, "I need $9,000." My daugther kept sleeping, but my wife found it pretty hard to do the same after that.

Kirk Parker said...

I totally believe the one about the crosses.

Not nearly that dramatic, but my daughter about age five had this conversation with me at church one day, as my wife started to write the check to go in the offering plate--

DAUGHTER [in a fairly quite voice for a kid her age]: You can give a check?

ME: Yes.

D: A writed-on check???

M: Yes.

[pause]

D: Then how can the poor people use it?????

Kelly said...

My three year old walked in the house and casually called her older sister a stupid whore. She'd been playing with the neighbor kids, it's the only place I could think it came from.