October 13, 2010

"I had sex with [the] girl once . . . maybe twice."

How do you lose count between 1 and 2?

59 comments:

Rialby said...

When you lose count of the girls.

lucid said...

gawd, read his quotes in the article. What a classy guy.

Maguro said...

Too much information.

Ann Althouse said...

The sex with his wife was too "scheduled." He should be scheduled for a thrashing.

SteveR said...

Nice, great move going on Stern to talk about a break up. Married for that long with a child and the legacy is a freakin joke.

traditionalguy said...

The same way you have always had one or maybe two beers but no more when the DUI Task Force questions you...you lie through your teeth and pray they can't prove otherwise. In the police stops, officers will believe one beer or three beers, but when you say two beers they go ahead and call for transportation to the jail. In my sewing wild oats days I still remember to this day every exciting moment of every seduction in vivid terms including the perfume she wore, but then I never used drugs.

Lem said...

I heard extended cuts of the "interview"...

Basically he cames across as a man-child.

Lem said...

check that..

I meant to say "he came across"

Irene said...

"My sexual encounter made me feel pretty manly".

In a fifteen-year-old boy sort of way.

BJM said...

A great way to patch things up with the Missus Dave-o.

edutcher said...

This is a guy who sounds like a candidate for DADT.

If all the women he's been with lately were boring or forgettable, maybe he's looking at the wrong sex.

Palladian said...

"My sexual encounter made me feel pretty manly"

High-class hookers generally try to please and flatter their clients.

Palladian said...

This guy must have come along after I stopped allowing the entertainment industry into my life because I have no idea who he or his estranged wife are.

Meade said...

That was yesterday. Today he Twittered an apology. So tomorrow they'll probably be back together don't you think? At least on Facebook maybe.

J said...

at first ah thought the Girl referred to the girl whose hand Davey's holding...then...recalled Miss AA's far too nice a dame to get that sorta par-tay rolling (at least...seems)

john said...

I thought this was going to be about that Chilean miner.

Pogo said...

Don't let that little frankfurter tell you what to do.
Dorothy Parker

Peter V. Bella said...

To all the girls I shtrupped before, who traveled in and out my door,I'm mad they came along, I dedicate this song, to all the girls I shtrupped before.

To all the girls I lost count of, and may I say I never loved, for helping me to know, the number's pretty low, to all the girls I shtrupped before.

traditionalguy said...

Meade...They may be back together in F-CK BOOK, the Duke U. internet dating site, but if he does this to her after 11 years of marriage, she won't be taking the screw up back.

William said...

He was faking it the first time, and so it didn't count.

peter hoh said...

This is why I have been promoting a constitutional amendment to ban celebrity marriage.

As to how he can't be sure if he had sex with this particular person once or twice, it is probably due to some confusion as to which acts count as sex.

1jpb said...

Sure, he's lame for cheating and telling. But, he had no sex for four months!!! That really sucks.

Lucien said...

"[O]nce . . . maybe twice" -- well there are a lot of ins and outs to this sort of thing.

You could count encounters, or maybe episodes during one encounter, or maybe whether two instances were separated by several hours of sleep. But of course, once you know your own nomenclature, there is no basis for uncertainty.

Best bet is if you remember once, and she says twice, and you were kinda drunk, then . . . maybe twice.

(Three two-letter words for small: "Is it in?")

David said...

"Scheduled" sex is pretty great, if you are actually looking forward to it. All that anticipation.

He may not have lost track between one and two, but he could plead diminished capacity, if he tried it twice in one night.

All kinds of diminished capacity going on with this guy.

AST said...

This reminds me of what drunks tell the cops when asked how much they've had to drink.

jamboree said...

@peter hoh

I second. I'll campaign. It's a fair trade.

Of course, we need another way for them to be relieved of their money...

so palimony will still apply.

yashu said...

Worse than "scheduled"-- "methodical."

EDH said...

Fool. The situation sounded like the perfect entree to suggest a threesome as "couple's therapy."

former law student said...

The sex with his wife was too "scheduled." He should be scheduled for a thrashing.

The professor and Meade are still on their honeymoon so it may be hard for them to visualize the situation. I bet after 11 years Courtney was no longer grabbing her husband by the front of his jeans and dragging him into an alcove. But after 11 years he was probably no longer bringing home a dozen roses and a bottle of Moet on a regular basis, either.

that-xmas said...

It's goddamn David Arquette. You don't marry an Arquette and expect to wake up in the morning next to a mature and stable person. Courtney knew who she married, but still expected him to "grow up".

But, the draw down in the sex life is a sign that she was tired of him and didn't want to talk to him about it. He was too dumb to realize that she had a real problem with him long before she kicked him to the curb.

Fred4Pres said...

Dude, one or two girls is like telling the cop when you get pulled over you had one or two drinks. A bad bad idea.

But your biggest mistake (beyond having an affair) is saying you want to get back together with Courtney Cox and then going on Howard Stern and discussing your sex life and affairs. Now I do not to pretend I am an expert on women...but I think that is a bad idea.

And you wonder why Courtney thinks you are a boy.

Fred4Pres said...

I just read the comments. You guys beat me to calling out Arquette on his BS statements. A lot of similar thinking going on here at Althouse.

Does Ann influence us to think this way? Or do like minded people get attracted to this site?

BTW, I showed my daughter the Althouse squirrel feet earrings and she wants a pair. Her mom inceeded and said absolutely not.

John Lynch said...

It depends what the definition of "sex" is.

John Lynch said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
New "Hussein" Ham said...

I wouldn't mind some methodically scheduled time with Courtney Cox. I guess some guys don't know when they have it good.

Arquette is living proof of the axiom that no matter how rich or beautiful a woman is, there's some guy out there who is sick and tired of her shit.

AllenS said...

I started to read the article, but quit when the words Howard Stern appeared.

Shanna said...

They're filming Scream 4?

Seriously, he's always seemed like a jerk and he still sounds like a jerk.

Pogo said...

If the '4 months freeze-out' is true, things went sour long before the roaming began.

But now that marriage is being redefined, what difference does it make? Maybe it's "his culture" to cheat. Genetic even.

Marriage has become just hooking up, with legal benefits, to be discarded at whim. Loyalty, it appears, is worthless.

Marriage has long been dead for blacks, now it's dying for whites.

More nails in that coffin coming soon.

Moose said...

Pogo -

Maybe that's SSM's contribution to society. Making marriage more "flexible".

Pogo said...

Heh.
If it was any more flexible it'd be a Möbius strip.

jr565 said...

Maybe the first time he just got a bj so was trying to figure out in his mind whether it would be considerd sex, a la Clinton.

AllenS said...

How do you lose count between 1 and 2?

Maybe alcohol was involved.

Sixty Grit said...

What would Charlie Weaver do?

Seriously, I have no idea...

ndspinelli said...

"It depends what your definition of is, is"

Pogo said...

One, two buckle my shoe
Three, four, shut the door...

bagoh20 said...

Growing up is over-rated.

peter hoh said...

Marriage has become just hooking up, with legal benefits, to be discarded at whim. Loyalty, it appears, is worthless.

Yes, this is the point I've been making for some time. Hollywood took the lead on this redefinition of marriage, but guys like Newt really helped cement it.

MadisonMan said...

Courtney: DTMFA.

Bob_R said...

This is all theoretical rather than practical knowledge, but it's my understanding that wives pretty universally consider "maybe" sex as sex.

bagoh20 said...

What has happened to marriage is that it has become just a gift that generally men give to women they are in love with. Like an expensive trinket. Like most such gifts, they soon get taken for granted and get put in the drawer. I have felt the compulsion to give that gift more than once, but resisted it, thank god. Nobody ever had to clean me out of their drawers...well maybe, but not in that way.

t-man said...

Perhaps Arquette's interview in January, blogged by Althouse here, had something to do with the freeze out.

traditionalguy said...

All you guys are being careful not to place any faith in a spouse to be loyal with you. OK, that is often true when the two are the only parties to the marriage. But marriage itself was originally seen as a God created, three way relationship between two believers in God and the Father God Himself being the third party. That is why Holy Matrimoni is vows taken before God and officiated by a Priest in a Church service. Finding such a "faith-full" spouse to make vows with is the missing ingredient today. So it may be better to find a date at a church singles group than to find a date at the local sports bar. Not that there is anything wrong with selfishness, as Johnny Cash used to sing about in a hit Mississippi country song called "I'm going to Jackson".

HDHouse said...

obviously one of the times was less than memorable.

c3 said...

Sure, he's lame for cheating and telling. But, he had no sex for four months!!! That really sucks.

1jpb felt manly reading the article

jr565 said...

Ann wrote:
The sex with his wife was too "scheduled." He should be scheduled for a thrashing.


Now now. Is this really that different than a woman saying a man never buys her flowers anymore? It's the same thing. Guys flowers are sex 9 (or ipods or sports). And thinking that the sex is scheduled is not spontaneous or exciting, but rather a chore and perfunctory. And who wants to engage in that.
David is simply saying he doesn't think that whatsher face appreciates him as a man. And so he's straying to some nameless bimbo who gets turned on having sex with a semi famous person.
Now, this is not to say that he should be cheating, or that's it's even realistic to expect sex to not become scheduled over time (or that women SHOULD expect to continue receiving flowers years after they've married a man) only that's where Dave is coming from.

bagoh20 said...

Perhaps we should save ourselves for marriage after sex.

It seems to just get in the way. No marriage before age 70, permanent erectile dysfunction or frigidity, whichever comes first. Then love can grow in a garden free of those nasty weeds.

jeff said...

Interesting coincidence. I also had sex with this woman zero, maybe once.

Trooper York said...

Althouse approves of husband beating.

Film at eleven.

Belkys said...

The Clintón´s trial judge did the question and she forgot one variety (again)