May 8, 2024

"Florida is at the forefront of a dizzying and contentious array of statewide bans..."

"... outlawing lab grown meat, certain books from school libraries and classrooms, and most abortions after six weeks. But the balloon ban is rare for garnering widespread bipartisan support.... The new legislation makes it clear that balloons can pose an environmental hazard, supporters say. It equates intentionally releasing a balloon filled with a gas lighter than air with littering...."

"Balloons Harm Wildlife. Florida Is Set to Ban Their Release/In an effort to curb microplastics and marine pollution, lawmakers in the Sunshine State voted overwhelmingly to make it illegal to intentionally let a balloon fly away" (NYT).

Of course, releasing a balloon is littering! How did people ever convince themselves that it wasn't? Well, they just didn't think about it, did they?

Side note: Did you spot the free-range "garnering" released into the wild?

54 comments:

Gusty Winds said...

Wisconsin should outlaw margarine again (oleo), and return the drinking age to 18.

mindnumbrobot said...

Sea turtles eat those balloons, believing they're jellyfish, and die. It may seem contrary for a place that proudly declares itself the Free State of Florida, but we take our wildlife conservation seriously. Don't believe me? It's nesting season, so just visit a beach at night a try using a flashlight. You'll be shocked how quickly an authority or random citizen appears out of nowhere and orders you to kill that fucking light!

robother said...

"Garnering support" must be one of the earliest journalistic macros. Also, isn't there a looming shortage of helium? Shouldn't we be rationing our scarce supplies for, I dunno, recording cartoon character voices?

n.n said...

The Green blight? Conservation of land and sea, flora and fauna, too.

Hold a parade, then clean up after yourself.

Teach the students, wait for adulthood, then groom them in a transgendered fashion.

Six weeks to legal viability of human life in all 50 states, except perhaps DC and sanctuary jurisdictions where Planned P... is celebrated to remove "burdens" of evidence. We need rational blade and vacuum control.

Civil unions for all consenting adults. The Democratic "Respect for Marriage Act" is a bigoted conception with Pro-Choice ethical apologetics.

Wince said...

"Florida is at the forefront of a dizzying and contentious array of statewide bans..."

Tells you all you need to know about the writer's mindset.

Never-Biden Never-Putin said...

I'm so dizzy.

What happened to the left's "don't say gay" lie?

Banning sex books in all school libraries should be a good thing. The pedo-left disagree... and lie.

hombre said...

"...dizzying and contentious array...." Lefties will happily bankrupt us with asinine laws and regulations relating to every subject on earth, but most particularly the Chicken Little Hoax. Think of your gas stove, your automobile, thousands of yuccas being torn up in California to make way for raptor-killing windmills.

Meanwhile, bad, bad Florida righties pursue a "dizzying and contentious array."

The hypocrisy is palpable.

BUMBLE BEE said...

Dizzying?
Maybe for the NYT's readership.
Math is Racist/Hard.
Isn't everything that is hard now racist?

Ron Winkleheimer said...

I'm reminded of this.

The word garner is spoken.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=boB2AVbUwkQ

Just remember, you can trust our technocratic overlords! They always get everything right.

On a serious note, I'm betting plenty of people were pointing out that dumping 2 million tires into the ocean would not benefit wildlife, that salt water would break them down and they would release pollutants into the water. Among other issues.

Jupiter said...

Gonna be hard to prove.

mccullough said...

I agree states should return drinking age to -8 to match the rest of the civilized world.

It was ridiculous that Reagan and Congress in the early 80s coerced states to raise the drinking age.

Just because they couldn’t drink legally until they were 22 because of Prohibition didn’t give them the authority to ruin it for those born after 1964.

CJinPA said...

Of course, releasing a balloon is littering! How did people ever convince themselves that it wasn't? Well, they just didn't think about it, did they?

It's like the SNL Yard-a-Pault. "Where she goes, nobody knows."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6prPrnXutKY

Yancey Ward said...

Did you know that a group of garners in the wild is called a gather?

jaydub said...

Pure arrogance. Outlawing lab grown meat, removing certain inappropriate books from school libraries and classrooms, and restricting most abortions after six weeks all have the support of a majority of Floridians. Moreover, we do not need the NYT to "Times 'splain" which state laws are acceptable and which are not. If they want to fix a legal problem why don't they start by reining in their activist DAs and getting rid of cashless bail. Once they get that accomplished maybe address rampant subway assaults. Or better yet why not work on NYC corruption? New York is a target rich environment for all types of legal and judicial reforms, and there is no need to go out of state to find something to work on.

Interested Bystander said...

More Lefty lies. FL didn't ban books. They only removed them from primary school libraries because, for children under 10, they are pornographic. We don't need dick pics and drawings of boys sucking other boy off in K-4th grade. Geezus. The books are still available but the little kids can't get their hands on them til they're older.

Curious George said...

Cleveland Balloon Fest

Bonus: Has the word garner in it.

Skeptical Voter said...

The State of New York might be wise to adopt a ban on courtroom testimony by semi retired hookers named Stormy Daniels.

Mike (MJB Wolf) said...

Lefties always lie. Moving books from the kiddie section to the adult section is not a "ban," and every time they say it is they remind me not to trust anything they say. I love the "lab 'meat'" ban wholesale, especially since Bezos dumped $60M into it.

But I wonder, why is this screed about Florida when the idiot republic of California has banned so many more things, things needed to actually survive like new electricity generation, natural gas and drilling for resources that otherwise wash up on the shore if not pumped. Then there's the crazy unattainable ICE automobile ban and all the classic books the state education secretary "banned" from schools long before DeSantis was even elected out East.

gilbar said...

But ballons are PRETTY! so they MUST Be fine! They're PRETTY!!!!
Plus, it's something that *I* am doing.. So it MUST BE fine!

pollution is when OTHER People do things! My Shit Don't Stink!!

reader said...

My husband and I took a CPR/Safety course after our son was born in 1997. I have always remembered the warnings about balloons.

Latex balloons are festive and colorful, but they are also the leading cause of choking deaths in children in the U.S. About 38 percent of all toy-related choking deaths reported between 2001 and 2014 involved balloons. Most of the balloon accidents involved children under the age of 6, but even older children should be warned of the dangers of chewing or sucking on balloons

Uninflated balloons and pieces of broken balloons are particularly hazardous because of the way they can stretch and mold to a child’s throat, making it impossible to breathe. Balloons are also very hard to remove from a child’s mouth or throat because of their smooth, slippery texture. Usual first-aid methods, like back slaps, the Heimlich maneuver (abdominal thrusts), or finger sweeps of the child’s mouth often do not work.

https://www.stlouischildrens.org/health-resources/pulse/why-are-latex-balloons-danger-children

stlcdr said...

We have lived under the law that everything is legal unless specifically prohibited. This only works if people think about the consequences of their actions, and are educated on this, as well as bound by morals and principles.

Clearly there are some gray or debatable issues - legislators should only need to meet once a year - but there should be some thought put into why an individual, or group, should or should not do a thing.

reader said...

We’ve been fine simply saying be careful with balloons around children, why can’t we just say don’t litter with your balloons.

Or could it be due to the large number of balloons floating around Disney World?

WK said...

Cleveland OH once held the Guinness record for largest balloon launch.
A major disaster: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Balloonfest_%2786

MadisonMan said...

"dizzying and contentious"
Uh huh. Okay, NYTimes. Sure. (Translation: We the great NYTimes think these sensible ideas hurt Biden)
Also, isn't there a looming shortage of helium?
I recently read about a huge deposit discovered under n. Minnesota.

Jamie said...

Releasing helium balloons is NIMBY littering!

I haven't read the article for details on this ban - I hope they're not banning balloons altogether, but rather banning balloon releases. I like balloons. They're fun.

Amexpat said...

What's wrong with lab grown meat if it meets safety standards?

loudogblog said...

Surprisingly, it's not illegal to release helium balloons in California. (Unless they're made of metal coated Mylar - because that can damage power transmission lines.)

I don't recall seeing large releases of helium balloons in the sky down here.

Usually, I'll see a single balloon floating away from the theme park and I wonder if some child is sad because their balloon got away from them.

loudogblog said...

Jamie said...
"Releasing helium balloons is NIMBY littering!

I haven't read the article for details on this ban - I hope they're not banning balloons altogether, but rather banning balloon releases. I like balloons. They're fun."

The bans will eventually be here.

"The Laguna Beach City Council voted Tuesday night to ban in public the popular mainstay of birthday and graduation parties, whether inflated with helium or not. Beginning in 2024, the balloons cannot be used on public property or at city events."

Butkus51 said...

Pull tabs and cigarette butts were ubiquitous at one time.

They should make soylent meat real expensive because then the richers will buy it all.

Us poor people will be eating lobster and ribs.

n.n said...

The books are still available but the little kids can't get their hands on them til they're older.

Social liberals, and progressives who share Levine's Dreams of Herr Mengele, should curb their enthusiasm.

Oh, go green, not Green, stop spreading the New Green Blight.

Quaestor said...

If the balloon ban had been enacted by the California state legislature and signed into law by Gavin Gnusum, the Nooyawk Fishwrap would be praising California in one breath for its environmental sanctity and damning Florida in the next breath for its troglodyte ecological insensitivity.

Enigma said...

Why pick on Florida, except for Republican government? Change the title to "California has a long, long, long, long history of odd and extreme statewide bans..."

California has a thing for dumping thousands of rubber duckies into waterways, even as environmentalists seek duckie chemical regulations.

http://www.seecalifornia.com/festivals/california-duck-races-derbies.html
https://www.kpbs.org/news/2007/09/20/consumer-activists-lobby-for-safer-rubber-ducky

Quaestor said...

"What's wrong with lab-grown meat if it meets safety standards?"

1) It's a fraud.

2) Who sets the standards? Not everyone unconditionally trusts authority.

MadisonMan said...

What's wrong with lab grown meat if it meets safety standards?
"Experts Say this meat is safe for consumption!"
It's possible there is a significant ag lobby seeking to protect farmers. They vote more than the few lab tissue-culture workers growing beef cells.

MadTownGuy said...

(D) states ban gas cars, gas stoves, evicting squatters = good.

(R) states ban age-inappropriate materials in schools, gender mutilation and enforcement of pronouns = bad.

FL bans balloons = eh, OK. Regulations protect, right? That's Dane County bumper sticker wisdom right there.

Temujin said...

From the city in the state that have more laws than people (but less than rats), we have them once again commenting about that other state. That Florida place.

Just some recent goings on in New York. Want to rent out your place in New York? Good luck.
Did NYC just kneecap Airbnb?

n.n said...

Manufactured meat is uneconomical and derived from animal sources. Capitalists can't afford it. Vegans don't want it. Omnivores don't like it. Go green with nature's choice.

Mike (MJB Wolf) said...

What's wrong with lab grown meat if it meets safety standards?

For one, calling it "meat" is wrong, just like calling almond juice "milk" is mislabeling it. Do like the Krab folks and find a close but not quite the same term for your fake food. As for safety standards, we have FDA and USDA systems that work fine for real meats, but I'd have less faith in any system designed by the bureaucrats post-Birx & Fauci. The CDC et al showed they were too willing to socially engineer us and safety be damned. Would the FDA do any better? Doubtful.

No one's stopping you from trying that crap, unless you live down here in Florida.

John henry said...


"Once the rockets are up, who cares where they come down?
That's not my department" say Wernher von Braun

Some have harsh words for this man of renown
But some think our attitude
Should be one of gratitude
Like the widows and cripples in old London town
Who owe their large pension to Wernher von Braun

Tom leherer

Rabel said...

"What were you arrested for, kid?"

Bob Boyd said...

Does lab grown snake taste like lab grown chicken?

Asking for a friend.

The Godfather said...

A "dizzying array" of bans: porno in schools, artificial "meat", and balloon litter? The federal Administrative State could (and does) ban 10 times as many things in a week and not break a sweat. The NYT needs to up its game if it really wants to scare its readers. Remind me: how many illegal/unvetted/possibly contagious border-jumpers is NYC hosting these days?

Bob Boyd said...

Has anyone actually experienced dizziness as a result of contemplating Florida bans? Maybe it wasn't the bans at all. Maybe Ms. Buckley has pig worm in there gnawing away. It wouldn't hurt for her to get a scan or something...nip this thing in the bud.

rehajm said...

Yah, Florida is the oppressive state in the current scenario. Riiight…

William50 said...

I have no problem with Lab Grown Meat. I wouldn't eat any unless I was starving but if people want to eat it I say go ahead. I would require that all lab meat be labeled with letters at least 1" high in bright yellow "Lab Grown Meat".

MadTownGuy said...

It used to be a thing to tie a post card with postage to a balloon and have the finder mail it back to you. Except now instead of a card in the mail you might get a summons.

MadTownGuy said...

More from the USDA & FDA:

FSIS Issues Public Health Alert for Ground Beef Products Due to Possible E. Coli

Excerpt: "The U.S. Department of Agriculture’s Food Safety and Inspection Service (FSIS) is issuing a public health alert for ground beef products that may be contaminated with E. coli O157:H7. FSIS is issuing this public health alert to ensure that consumers are aware that these products should not be consumed. A recall was not requested because the products are no longer available for purchase.
...
The problem was discovered by the establishment while conducting an inventory of product that was on hold because it was found positive for E. coli O157:H7. The company notified FSIS that they inadvertently used a portion of the contaminated beef to produce ground beef products that they subsequently shipped into commerce.

There have been no confirmed reports of illness due to consumption of these products. Anyone concerned about an illness should contact a healthcare provider.
"

From the FDA: Decaf coffee might be banned in the U.S. (here's why)
"All coffee beans naturally contain caffeine. So in order to decaffeinate the beans to make a cup of decaf, the beans must undergo a process using chemical solvents, primarily with methylene chloride.
...
OSHA considers methylene chloride to be a likely carcinogen, meaning it could be linked to cancer. The Food and Drug Administration (FDA) has been weighing the substance since January 2024. And on Tuesday, the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) banned the use of methylene chloride for most applications

As it stands now, the FDA allows a small trace — 10 parts per million (0.001%) — of methylene chloride to remain on beans for consumption. So the FDA filed a petition earlier in 2024 requesting that some potentially harmful chemicals, including methylene chloride, benzene, ethylene dichloride, and trichloroethylene, be removed from food and beverages.
"

The Swiss Water decaffeination process takes more time and may add cost to the product, though the quality of the beans is the greatest cost driver.

Tofu King said...

Pretty humorous reading as the young NYT progressive reporters struggle with a Republican led state doing something for the environment. Probably had some shaking and sweats.

Bob Boyd said...

Is it okay to release lab grown ballons?

Mason G said...

In California, joshua trees and desert tortoises are protected by law. Also in California, thousands of acres of desert land *cough*joshua tree and desert tortoise habitat*cough* have already been (and are in the process of being) torn up in order to install solar farms.

Go Green!

Amexpat said...

1) It's a fraud.
2) Who sets the standards? Not everyone unconditionally trusts authority.


Neither reason justifies a total ban on lab grown "meat". Point #1 is a labelling issue. If that's a concern the state can require labels that meets the State's concern. I certainly would support having "Lab Grown" prominently displayed on the labels. I think we should do the same thing for anything AI generated.

If you accept the premise of Point # 2 then no new products should be allowed because we can't trust the government to regulate them. That's not going to happen, nor should it.

Such laws are a good example of governement overreach. Just as bad when done by the Right as with the Left. It may also be an example of a powerful lobby group, big Ag, using undue and imporper influence to pass a law that suits their financial interests rather than the public good.

typingtalker said...

Everybody is against something. Everybody is for something. Let everybody vote on everything!

typingtalker said...

A law which is promoted by a vanishingly small number of very vocal voters.

A law which might be opposed by a vanishingly small number of not-very-vocal voters.

A law that in reality will have a vanishingly small effect on any creature living or already dead.

mikee said...

My first exposure to the concept of non-animal-grown meat was playing Dungeons and Dragons in 1977 as a freshman in college. Clerics were able to produce "food" like meat with some kind of a prayer. Doing so enabled the crew to carry less supplies and more loot and weapons into a dungeon. But my DM, good old Ed B., enjoyed describing the formation of gristly blocks of vein-filled muscle that while nourishing, even when cooked was utterly disgusting to one and all. We had to succeed in a saving throw of the dice for dinner, to avoid a loss of strength from puking over it. So apparently not much has changed with lab-grown meat since then.