October 17, 2016

"Any able-bodied person who owns a gun should take that gun and spend the evening driving around town looking for anything white lurking in alleyways."

Rule #2 for how to go trick-or-treating in the Churchill, Canada, where thousands of polar bears arrive in the fall, hungry from fasting and waiting for the ice they need to get out into Hudson's Bay and start hunting for seals.

26 comments:

rehajm said...

...where thousands of polar bears arrive in the fall...

Wait- what? Thousands of polar bears???

Eric the Fruit Bat said...

I'm guessing that treat-or-treating as Lady Gaga wearing a meat dress would be a very, very bad idea.

Bob Ellison said...

We have that same problem, well, maybe not quite the same, when millions of lizards arrive in Scottsdale, AZ, to feast on dead zombies. That's why we shoot the zombies: to feed the lizards. They're coming around anyway, and somebody's gotta eat 'em.

tim in vermont said...

Didn't the polar bears all die off during the Holocene Optimum, when the Arctic circle was much higher due to long term wobbles in the Earth's orbit, when the summer sun was more directly overhead, when it was far warmer in the Arctic than today?

And at the same time, didn't the methane time bomb go off? I mean, all of that increased insolation on the permafrost, the higher temps? Surely the world ended!

Bob Boyd said...

I bet they don't have a creepy clown problem in Churchill, CA.

Left Bank of the Charles said...

About 1,000 polar bears, 10,000 tourists.

Achilles said...

It is almost as if there are more polar bears now than there were a few decades ago.

Is everything the climate change people say wrong? Has any group of people been more wrong?

Quaestor said...

At first glance I thought that might be a BLM tweet.

Bryan Townsend said...

Yes, the headline made me thing first of Charlotte!

mockturtle said...

At first glance I thought that might be a BLM tweet.

Yeah, I think that was the intent.

Curious George said...

Can't they just lure them out in the open with a nice cold Coke?

holdfast said...

Who the hell writes "Churchill, Canada"? There's certainly more than a single town named after Sir Winston in Canada. Normally you'd see it as "Churchill, Manitoba".

Johanna Lapp said...

I hear the same thing every time I use the Broad Street Subway.
But we don't have polar bears in Philadelphia.

AReasonableMan said...

mockturtle said...
At first glance I thought that might be a BLM tweet.
Yeah, I think that was the intent.


Althouse now race-baiting à la Drudge. Sad.

Mike said...

Looked like a BLM quote on the surface. That was good, Althouse, so very good.

Big Mike said...

Bears eat people. People don't want to be eaten. Such a conundrum.

Rusty said...

holdefast
I think this Churchill is the only one with polar bears. Canadians probably know that so it isn't necessary to be more specific. Huge buncha land, not very many people in it.
Polar Bears estivate.

Larry J said...

Left Bank of the Charles said...
About 1,000 polar bears, 10,000 tourists.


That's 10 tourists for every bear. They could do it.

bagoh20 said...

Was hiking the San Gabriel Mountains over the weekend with the family including four dogs. There were bear hunters everywhere. What does bear taste like? And don't you dare say "chicken".

lgv said...

I thought they were talking about Chicago until I read the polar bear part.

"What does bear taste like?"

I have known game hunters. I don't recall any actually eating bear meat. It would have to be near the bottom of the game meat category. The pelt was the prize.

holdfast said...

Tastes like pork, but greasier. Ok for stews, sausages or spaghetti sauce. Problem is, black bears who live near humans eat a lot of garbage. So you only want to eat deep woods bears.

holdfast said...

Most bear hunters I know would eat it. Some would donate the meat to a local Indian band. Feather, not dot.

Rusty said...

holdfast said...
"Tastes like pork, but greasier. Ok for stews, sausages or spaghetti sauce. Problem is, black bears who live near humans eat a lot of garbage. So you only want to eat deep woods bears."

So do pigs.

Kate said...

The Knockout Game when "played" in Anchorage is called Polar Bear Hunting. I read the blurb in a very different way than was intended.

DavidD said...

This has to be a joke.

"Bears love Snickers bars, but are unlikely to attack large groups of people."

DavidD said...

" 'Guns and children don’t mix.' "

" 'I was dressed as a weak-kneed Californian who’d never fired a gun....' "

Hoplophobe.