January 16, 2014

"I eat pizza with a knife and fork because I want only the gooey stuff on top, not the crust."

Says Maureen Dowd, on the occasion of "the fledgling New York mayor’s de Blasphemy" getting caught "daintily carving up his smoked-mozzarella-and-sausage pizza at Goodfellas in Staten Island with a knife and fork."

What man wants a woman to come to his defense like that? 1. Does a man want a woman to defend him at all? 2. Does a man want a woman to defend in particular from an accusation that he is behaving in a manner that's too refined/prissy? 3. She used "daintily" in the second sentence. 4. She describes her own eating in a manner that essentially confesses to not eating pizza at all.

After 2 years of frequent pizza eating — in the first 2 years of our marriage, Meade made pizza (not to mention pancakes) just about every day — I've been eating low-carb for the last 2 years. I get how you can transform pizza into a low-carb meal by just eating the stuff on top, but the whole point of pizza is a great crust, and the stuff on top makes no sense without the crust. If I were trapped somewhere and hungry and the only thing there was to eat was the stuff off the top of pizza, I'd eat it, but I wouldn't say I was eating pizza.

Anyway. I'm sure Dowd knows her defense isn't really a defense, and she knows de Blasio is such a big manly guy he's got no worries about appearing too feminine (a point of distinction from the previous NYC mayor). Things like this only hurt when they reinforce negatives or refute positives that are already implanted in our head:
Sargent Shriver calling for a Courvoisier in an Ohio mill town bar. Jerry Ford at the Alamo, biting into a tamale without removing the corn husk. Jimmy Carter’s fishing trip that turned into “Paws,” fending off a Killer Rabbit. Michael Dukakis advising farmers to grow Belgian endive, and Barack Obama talking the price of arugula. When John Kerry ordered Swiss cheese on his Philly cheesesteak in 2003, it buoyed Republican efforts to paint him as a Frenchie, fromage-loving surrender monkey.
Now, there's a list I'd like to see lengthened. You'd think Dowd would have come up with a comparable embarrassment for George W. Bush and Ronald Reagan. Were there none?

67 comments:

Farmer said...

in the first 2 years of our marriage, Meade made pizza (not to mention pancakes) just about every day

What the hell? That's insane!

surfed said...

J'accuse

traditionalguy said...

Dan Rather can get you whatever revelation documents you want to scuttle a Bush Presidential run. Jeb Bush's faux pas of horrors are probably being printed up as we speak.

Eating pizza with crust and all is for the first two slices. Eating the topping only is for the last two pieces that no one wants.

BDNYC said...

Didn't something like this happen when Palin was in NYC visiting with Trump? I seem to recall the snarky lefties having a field day with it.

Curious George said...

Well, the best pizza is deep dish and requires a knife or at least a fork. And Lou malnati's is the best of that genre.

I only use a knife and fork for thin crust when I microwave leftovers...the crust gets too soggy to hold up the slice.

SomeoneHasToSayIt said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
SomeoneHasToSayIt said...

Actually, a good tip for people transitioning to low carb is to, if they are craving pizza, eat just the topping until you are almost finished/satisfied, then let the last 2 or three bites be with crust too.

Since the brain and the taste buds only really remember the last bite or two, you will end up with every sensation of having eaten pizza normally, but with very very little of the carbs.

Who cares if some scold says "That's not really eating pizza."?

Tibore said...

"What man wants a woman to come to his defense like that? 1. Does a man want a woman to defend him at all?"

The answer's pretty much "No". :D


Xander: Do you know what you just did?
Buffy: Saved you a dollar?
Xander: No, but Larry was about to pummel me!
Buffy: Oh, that? Forget about it!
Xander: Oh, I'll forget about it. In maybe fifteen, twenty years when my rep for being a sissy man finally fades!
Buffy: Xander, don't you think you're...
Xander: A black eye heals, Buffy, but cowardice has an unlimited shelf life. Oh, thanks! Thanks a lot for your help.


;)

Ralph Hyatt said...

Since it is New York, aren't you supposed to fold the slice in half?

Searches Internet . . .

Why yes, you are.

http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/eat-new-york-style-slice-pizza-article-1.1575897

Humperdink said...

The first rule of thumb for any politician is never permit the press to view you while you are eating. Something unsavory is bound to come up (eh).

I cannot recall seeing a pic Chris Christie dining (for obvious reasons). On that point, he staff was well trained.

TMink said...

I am happy for politicians to eat their pizza any way they wish. It is their votes and policies that I care about.

Trey

MadisonMan said...

Here's what DeBlasio should say: Why the hell do you care how I eat Pizza. Get. A. Life.

Jay Vogt said...

My favorite of this ilk is from just prior to the Bush/Gore election. It happens that, for the official World Series magazine, Gore and Bush provided written answers to some questions pertaining to baseball, including, "What do you think of domed stadiums?" Gore's complete answer was:

"The design and construction of domed stadiums--in Seattle (the Kingdome was the first free-standing cement dome ever built), Houston (the Astrodome was the first stadium to use Astroturf) and Minnesota (the Metrodome is the only stadium in the U.S. whose roof is suspended without beams or rods--it's supported by air pressure), for example--have been feats of architectural and engineering excellence. But the real measure of any stadium, domed or otherwise, is how much fun you have inside."

Bush's complete answer was: "I like to go to baseball games outdoors."

Jay Vogt said...

. . . MadisonMan said...
Here's what DeBlasio should say: Why the hell do you care how I eat Pizza. Get. A. Life.. . .


That too.

Birkel said...

George H. W. Bush discussing how the scanners operated at a grocery store???

virgil xenophon said...

@Jay Vogt/

Interestingly the appropriately named "Superdome" in New Orleans is the only one left still standing and is still pretty much functionally up-to-date with only minor modifications--a fact that seems to totally justify the cost of its construction and attest to the far-sightedness of its designers. . There is no thought (or need) to building a "replacement" either..

DanTheMan said...

This is just another corrallary to the Althouse Rule: When comparing men and women, women must be better.

So, if a man is told he is doing something the way a woman does, then it's better.

virgil xenophon said...

@Birkel/

That is a lefty propaganda myth. Original scanners entered only the price of an item for ease/speed of checkout. Bush well knew what they were. Rather, Bush was being shown the (then) new generation of scanners which tied into inventory & sales and automatically updated them--a totally new advance at that time. It was to THAT technical aspect of the scanners that was being demonstrated to Bush and that Bush was remarking upon..

RonF said...

"Smoked" mozzarella? WTF?

Here in Chicago - as I'm sure Ann well knows - some of the best pizza HAS to be eaten with a knife and fork. Namely, thick crust pizza. The lousy ones just use standard pizza dough and make it thicker. But the best ones (say, Malnati's) use a dough that has more granularity to it and really tastes good.

RonF said...

Jay, do you have a problem with Bush's answer on that? I'd probably give the same answer. Why should Gore's discussion of history and architecture be superior to Bush's answer on not particularly liking them?

Jay Vogt said...

. . . .virgil xenophon said...

Interestingly the appropriately named "Superdome" in New Orleans is the only one left still standing and is still pretty much functionally up-to-date with only minor modifications--a fact that seems to totally justify the cost of its construction and attest to the far-sightedness of its designers. . There is no thought (or need) to building a "replacement" either..


I was a kid in Minneapolis when they built the HHH Metordome( which is currently being demolished).

It was built on the cheap in the recessionary '70's. Even as it opened its doors it was a soulless place. Other than the Twin's World Series victories, it will leave no wake of nostalgia.

That being said, I suppose they got their money's worth out of it.

Matthew Sablan said...

I eat pizza with a fork and knife. I have almost lost friends over this fact.

Terry said...

Jay Vogt quoted Al Gore:
"and Minnesota (the Metrodome is the only stadium in the U.S. whose roof is suspended without beams or rods--it's supported by air pressure)"
The Metrodome roof collapsed due to heavy snow in 2010.
What is it with Gore, anyway?

Matthew Sablan said...

You want to see people get all weird about eating habits? Eat french fries with a fork.

People will hate you irrationally for YEARS.

Matthew Sablan said...

... I just hate the feeling of grease and gunk on my fingers.

rehajm said...

when I microwave leftovers...the crust gets too soggy to hold up the slice.

Try reheating in a cast iron skillet.

Jay Vogt said...

. . . RonF said...

Jay, do you have a problem with Bush's answer on that? I'd probably give the same answer. Why should Gore's discussion of history and architecture be superior to Bush's answer on not particularly liking them?
. . . .

Not at all. I suppose either answer is fine, but w/r/t Ann's observation that some responses to American icons seem kind of prissy and "off" (i.e eating New York style pizza with a fork) my example of Gore's response to baseball stadiums seemed, if not prissy, then pointlessly erudite.

Bush's was more culturally tuned and maybe appropriately masculine.

That said, Maddisonman was right, who really cares?

Strelnikov said...

Of course not! When Reagan and Bush ate pizza with their hands it was highly symbolic of the Patriarchy's attempt to dominate womyn. Who could defend or explain something so heinous?

Gahrie said...

You'd think Dowd would have come up with a comparable embarrassment for George W. Bush and Ronald Reagan. Were there none?


It's because Dowd is outraged at the attempts to embarass Democrats, but is fine with embarassing Republicans.

Strelnikov said...

" And Lou malnati's is the best of that "

Fool! I have one word for you: Gino's.

Darrell said...

George H. W. Bush discussing how the scanners operated at a grocery store???

Virgil touched on it but Bush's comment was made after viewing a "scanner of the future" at a trade show. The demo was that a full cart of groceries were dumped on a feed belt to a scanning head with multiple lasers, and it was itemized antotaleded in seconds with something like 99+% accuracy. The whole episode exposed the bias of the MSM for the first time at that level. The people writing the articles knew the full story but kept neglecting the "next gen" aspect. The same talking heads that were confronted with the facts by other guests one week would start the argument from scratch two weeks later, never mentioning the proof they had been shown. Of course, that's a standard tactic of the Left. Listening to local talk radio, this was the principal reason many married women voted for Clinton--it convinced them that Bush was out of touch with their lives and needs.

Strelnikov said...

As long as he is not eating a Snickers that way, no problem.

CWJ said...

Chicago pizza -

No love for Uno/Due's?

I really loved Giordano's double crust pizza when it first appeared back in the 70'S. Does it, Edwardo's, or Bacino's still exist?

MadisonMan said...

Fool! I have one word for you: Gino's.

Gino's on State St here closed last year. I'm sad I never went one last time. Fond memories of their ice cream drinks and deep dish pizzas from grad school.

johnnymcguirk said...

Ted Kennerdy- It is a special pleasure for me to introduce our two home run heroes...Mike McGwire and Sammy Sooser.

SGT Ted said...

More proof that Dowd and crowd never really grew up. They eat pizza like picky children.

EMD said...

Deep dish is for suckers.

Neapolitan all the way.

CWJ said...

Back on topic -

Dukakis' campaign ad with him sticking his helmeted head up out of a moving tank.

Also John Kerry's windsurfing. I understand why this was supposed to be so damaging, but for me that was not so terrible.

EMD said...

As a socialist, shouldn't DeBlasio eat at the people's pizzeria, Ray's? (or Famous Rays or Ray's Original or World-Famous Ray's Original?)

EMD said...

Also John Kerry's windsurfing. I understand why this was supposed to be so damaging, but for me that was not so terrible.

I'll see your windsurfing and raise you a clean, er, bunny suit.

EMD said...

Obama - Cominskey Park.

EMD said...

Obama - Total girl first pitch tosser.

EMD said...

Obama - bike helmet and mom jeans.

EMD said...

Obama - Who is your favorite White Sox player?

Uhh ...

Carl said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMvt7aye7K8

CWJ said...

EMD - Obama said Cominsky Field. Even worse.

EMD said...

"EMD - Obama said Cominsky Field. Even worse."

Yikes!

Exurban Bourbon said...

At a diner in New Hampshire shortly before the primary, upon being asked if he wanted a refill of his coffee, Bush the Elder replied "Just a splash". Think it was when he was the incumbent, running against Buchanan. The press made a fuss about it -- effete and elitist, don't you know.

virgil xenophon said...

Someone should have asked Obama what the old Cominskey smelled like. An answer of ANYTHING other than stale beer and urine would have given the game away..

EMD said...

Mr.President, where were you on Disco Demolition Night?

Brando said...

First, whether pizza should be eaten with utensils depends on the pizza. Floppy, thin crust pizza laden with toppings? Utensils, my friends! If you can fold or roll it, hands!

Second, I don't see how using utensils to eat pizza makes you "dainty". You know what dainty people do in pizza places? They ask if they can order something besides pizza.

DeBlasio as far as I can tell doesn't have an image problem with being "dainty" so much as he does with being far left of the mainstream. This isn't a problem in NYC except to the extent he will need to encourage businesses and wealthy residents to stay there to maintain the tax base. NYC more than most places is very dependent on its highest earners for its budget.

Exurban Bourbon said...

At least Barry didn't call it Alinsky Park.

Peter said...

Scraping the good stuff off the top of a pizza and throwing away the crust seems like the spoiled rich kid, the one who won't eat the crusts on his PB&J (or any) sandwich.

One could argue that he's not a kid, and if he paid for the pizza, it's his to do with as he pleases.

But this is de Blasio, champion of the proletariat. So perhaps it's unseemly (or at least poor politics) for him to act like a spoiled rich kid.

Sigivald said...

If Maureen Dowd "defended" me on any subject, I'd start looking real hard at it to see how I'd gone wrong.

azaniamindset said...

Recent examples of this type of 'scandal' are the press being agog that Romney was supposedly 'amazed' at ordering a sub at WaWas.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/post-partisan/post/romneys-wawas-story-in-context-still-out-of-touch/2012/06/19/gJQAxIh4nV_blog.html

The there was the scandal when the Millennials found out that McCain didnt email. The fact that he didnt because his fingers had been crunched by the Viet Cong was moot point given the qualifications that are necessary for the POTUS.

There was also an amusing wave of hipster anxiety that went around when Obama was photographed with a tragically uncool Zune.

Revenant said...

I eat deep-dish pizza that way (if you can call it "pizza").

TosaGuy said...

"Sargent Shriver calling for a Courvoisier in an Ohio mill town bar"

Didn't know that he was such a Ladies' Man

mccullough said...

Kerry's "Lambert Field" displayed his football bona fides. He still won Wisconsin, barely. But he didn't win Missouri.

TosaGuy said...

I use a fork for eating pizza and use it to cut it on my plate. Never use a knife.

I suspect he used the European method of using a knife and fork, which I hate with the passion of a thousand suns.

Freeman Hunt said...

At one point, my dad had two pizza franchises and worked in one of them nearly every day. Before that, he was in charge of operations at the corporate office. Before that, he managed a pizza place. Before that he worked at a pizza place.

He sometimes used a knife and fork to eat his pizza.

So I say it's okay.

paul a'barge said...

... de Blasio is such a big manly guy...

No, frankly he is not.

He is a big, fat blob of progressive nuttery who is married to a Lesbian.

Nothing about this guy is manly.

paul a'barge said...

@Freeman Hunt: He sometimes used a knife and fork to eat his pizza.

So I say it's okay.


Was he using the knife and fork to scrape the topping off the pizza so he did not eat the crust?

Was this pizza in some reputable, quality pizza place or in someplace like a Domino's franchise?

And why would you suggest your father as a metric for anything of quality? We don't know the guy from Adam.

R.B. Glennie said...

I personally remove the cheese and toppings with a fork - because I hate it when you chew into a pizza and more of the cheese than the do comes off (as it often does), at which point it droops down and burns your chin.

At least, this is my experience.

Otherwise, I simply pick it off with my hands. It's finger food after all.

Freeman Hunt said...

If you had a winding watch, how tight would you wind its spring? Tight? Very tight? Superlatively tight?

Freeman Hunt said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Godfather said...

He's a kraut, not a wop. Who would expect him to be an expert pizza eater?

Wikipedia: De Blasio was born Warren Wilhelm, Jr. in Manhattan, the son of Maria (née De Blasio) and Warren Wilhelm.

BTW, I'm also half kraut, born in NYC, and I do know how to eat a pizza.

Andy Freeman said...

> The there was the scandal when the Millennials found out that McCain didnt email. The fact that he didnt because his fingers had been crunched by the Viet Cong was moot point given the qualifications that are necessary for the POTUS.

Actually, he did, or rather, he did via his wife, who actually pushed the buttons.

That scenario was presented as a reason to prefer the "hip and with it" McCain against Bush 4 years earlier. (Yup, dictation....)

The left/media love McCain until he's actually running against them.