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Junior High Boys everywhere are laughing.
Ezekiel 20:11 “Now her sister Oholibah saw this, yet she was more corrupt in her lust than she, and her harlotries were more than the harlotries of her sister.12 “She lusted after the Assyrians, governors and officials, the ones near, magnificently dressed, horsemen riding on horses, all of them desirable young men.13 “I saw that she had defiled herself; they both took the same way.14 “So she increased her harlotries. And she saw men portrayed on the wall, images of the Chaldeans portrayed with vermilion,15 Girded with belts on their loins, with flowing turbans on their heads, all of them looking like officers, like the Babylonians in Chaldea, the land of their birth.16 “When she saw them she lusted after them and sent messengers to them in Chaldea.17 “The Babylonians came to her to the bed of love and defiled her with their harlotry. And when she had been defiled by them, she became disgusted with them.18 “She uncovered her harlotries and uncovered her nakedness; then I became disgusted with her, as I had become disgusted with her sister.19 “Yet she multiplied her harlotries, remembering the days of her youth, when she played the harlot in the land of Egypt.20 “She lusted after their paramours, whose [erections are] like the [erections] of donkeys and whose [ejaculate] is [equal in volume to] the [ejaculate] of stallions.21 “Thus you longed for the lewdness of your youth, when the Egyptians handled your bosom because of the breasts of your youth.22 “Therefore, O Oholibah, thus says the Lord GOD, ‘Behold I will arouse your lovers against you, from whom you were alienated, and I will bring them against you from every side:And to think I almost went to Seminary. How divine.
They had fun in the Old Testament.
What MadMan said.Most of those etymologies were stretched thinner than, oh I dunno, some really skinny model that everybody likes to tut-tut over her eating disorder or drug habit or bony ass or something.
#1 was pretty obvious. Back in the day (1975-1979) as an undergrad at UW Madison, one of the classic stories was that of a deranged pre-medical student, who liked to practice on himself. He arranged a makeshift operating room in his dorm (Witte Hall) and was in the process of doing an appendectomy on himself, unassisted, when he realized he was in some trouble. He called paramedics and when they responded, they noted the unusual apparatus he had set up (mirrors, special lighting, etc. The fellow was taken to UW Hospital and Clinics, and the inevitable investigation explained that he was mentally ill, and had, prior to the aborted appendectomy, given himself an orchidectomy.
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