December 8, 2012

"The Internet's most ostentatiously blissful women — the curators of domesticity on Pinterest, Tumblr, and thousands of female-driven blogs..."

"... occupy a sexless aspirational world, a modern Douglas Sirk fantasy of color-saturated feminine mystique."
So-called “food porn” or “shelter porn” is as close as we get to corporeal abandon. Forget teen sexters posting DIY erotica online. At the forefront of female cyber-exhibitionism, lifestyle blogging barely even acknowledges that physical pleasure exists, never mind its key role in domestic bliss.

43 comments:

Chuck Currie said...

HGTV caused the real estate bubble. People would do anything for granite counter tops, marble/hardwood floors, stainless steel restaurant quality appliances, recessed lighting, and on, and on, and on - including lying about their income on a loan application.

Cheers

Kelly said...

I was actually relieved when my 23 year old began taking an interest in Pinterest. She was always a right old slob, never took an interest in cooking or other domestic chores except the time I was out of town and she set the stove on fire trying to cook dinner for her dad. Luckily the only damage was the microwave melted. Our alarm system was wired to the fire station and they made it in time before the whole house could burn down.

Now she is actually cooking for her new husband. He's pretty happy about it too.

Bob Ellison said...

Ohmigosh, Chuck Currie, I instantly thought of HGTV as well. That's the most mind-numbingly boring, awful TV channel ever invented. My wife runs it in the background pretty often. I feel like we aren't the same species.

karlpoppersghost said...

""The Internet's most ostentatiously blissful women — the curators of domesticity on Pinterest, Tumblr, and thousands of female-driven blogs...At the forefront of female cyber-exhibitionism, lifestyle blogging barely even acknowledges that physical pleasure exists, never mind its key role in domestic bliss.

Oh, bull or should I use the quaint and classy feminist phrase "I call bullshit!!"

I've gone to pinterest a lot in the past month since hearing about it and I see plenty of images other that food and furnishing porn.

There are endless photos of shirtless men showing off their 6 pack abs and plenty of women doing the same thing. That site seems to have an editorial preference for women who are covered with tattoos and who have the mid section of a reptile.

I also see plenty of photos of couples holding hands and being lovey dovey.

I see endless photos of weddings, babies, puppies, grumpy cats, men kissing women's pregnant bellies and back lit photos of couples at magic hour.

True not a lot of penises going into orifices but Lauren Sandler shouldn't need pinterest for that.

Yet both pinterest and tumblr feature porn images now and then, tumblr has graphic porn sections.

Sandler seems to be playing the game favored by hack Camille Paglia - look at me I'm edgy, real, I like sexy sexy tyme not like those prudish 1950s, WASP, blonde cookie bakers, boo hiss.

Pinterest etal = Sandra Dee and Doris Day. Yuck.

What happened to the revolution, we're going backward.

What next...voting Republican?

Faint

Renee said...

Most of our sexual freedoms are based on our right to privacy. Stop prying.

Seeing Red said...

And the feminists cry.

And I LMAO.

So all these girls w/the in-your-face sexuality will turn into Martha Stewart when a ring is put on it?

Then there's the mother/daughter sex duo performing acts and thinking of all that money!

McTriumph said...

HGTV is not the worse channel, natgeo is. On natgeo they hunt for sasquatch and ghosts.
At least HGTV has remodeling for older homes occasionally.

Seeing Red said...

--What happened to the revolution, we're going backward.---


Nature wins unless you're Julia.

It's getting closer to the free-for-all.

OTOH, antibiotic-resistant gonhorrea might put a damper on things, that 20% of the population on herpes meds for the rest of their lives might also have a teensy thing to do with it.

Mitchell the Bat said...

Gee. It's as if there's a bunch of people out there telling us we should be like a certain kind of person because there's a bunch of other people out there telling us we should be like a certain kind of person but we shouldn't want to be like that kind of person.

whoresoftheinternet said...

This just in....

Women will bitch about other women "not being in touch with their sexuality."

And then bitch that women who talk about their sex lives are "oversharing" and "slutty" and "boring."

Bitch bitch bitch, never fix, never help, never do. Always whine and complain. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Men do. Women bitch.

Jana said...

Whomever wrote that must not know that Heather Armstrong is in the midst of a divorce. Her daring posts about sexuality don't appear to have helped foster a better marriage.

Ann Althouse said...

I think one factor here is that it's just much harder to write about sex (without sounding ridiculous, I mean).

Sam L. said...

It's just terrible, and completely unacceptable to me, for women to talk about food and not be sexually needy and desirous. And not wear diaphanous nearly-clothing. It's just wrong. Remember the dinner scene in "Tom Jones".

What are these women thinking?

David said...

I hope someone can figure out just what in the world this woman was trying to say. Damn that's awful writing.

YoungHegelian said...

Ladies,

Can you please just learn to leave other ladies alone to live their lives as they see fit?

I can see why women so often vote for state intervention in such numbers. There seems to be be an ingrained disposition to see fucking with other people's lives as something that's just done.

deborah said...

What a tedious article. The author has no idea what is going on in bed with the women who are into "shelter porn." Shelter porning could be displacing sex, enhancing sex, or make one too tired for sex. The author apparently feels guilty she has laundry on her rocking chair or just needed to meet a deadline and came up with this.

Recently found shelter porn site; houzz.com

This link I created by using their search function:

http://www.houzz.
com/painted-fireplace

acm said...

What garbage. Who doesn't recognize the difference between sexual pleasure and the pleasure of a lovely home or a good recipe? I regularly invite my family and friends over to see my newly decorated house or eat my cooking, but I've not yet invited anyone over for the purpose of showing off a new sexy-time move. Maybe I'm doing it wrong?

It's interesting, too, that the author accuses bloggers of pretending that physical pleasures don't exist, but she herself seems to think that physical letdowns don't exist. Food and lifestyle bloggers write about the recipes that flop and the drapes that don't work after all...are they supposed to also write about foibles in the bedroom and is their partner just supposed to be okey-dokey with that? Geesh, does she forget that partners exist and may have different desires for privacy?

Chip Ahoy said...

lifestyle blogging barely even acknowledges that physical pleasure exists, never mind its key role in domestic bliss.

Man, am I slow on the uptake today, I need more Ovaltine. But I get it now, she's telling us that female bloggers should spice it up by including bits about physical pleasure and its key role in domestic bliss on their blogs when they get married. Like this:

This is where David threw me over the counter and nailed me. Oi veh. It was such a surprise, that imp, and it did hurt, all the slamming, but I held onto this edge right here and that protected my elbows and once that was settled we really got into it hard.

This window is where David was standing when I spontaneously tore down his pants and he was free balling! Hahahaha He got so excited he jumped me right here on the carpet in front of these lovely French windows opened to the garden.

Sometimes I slip out of these silk sheets early without being detected and freshen up, brush my teeth and such in this lovely remodeled bathroom then slide back into bed and tease David with his morning wood. He's always up for a morning blow job. This one time I go, I'm not going one more inch until I trim up this overgrown forest and he's all, oh you're not touching me with that, but with a little female coercion I got that hairy thing manscaped.

Doggy style on the massively oversized but still in scale side comfort chair.

Like that. See? I'm trying to show that I understand.




wyo sis said...

Sex isn't the only way to have fun and women who are obsessed with it are just as banal as women who are obsessed with "lifestyle" or any other thing.
Why can't we just be interested in what we're interested in and not be bothered with people who think they know what's best for us?
Someone is making a buck from it either way.
It's not surprising that women find things besides sex to think about after they're married. Men do too, and yet the sex is always there when we need it.
I guess columnists have to find something to write about, but complaining that women are interested in domestic issues as well as "getting it on" is pretty lame.


Elle said...

Thought the same thing, Jana.

There's sharing, and then there's oversharing. This will sound far too '50s housewife for a lot of you, but a happy home makes for a happy marriage, in all ways, ahem.

And as my mother taught me, there's nothing wrong with a little mystery.

acm said...

Yes. If you (or your partner---imagine that, a separate person with his own desires for privacy!) don't want your great aunt Gertrude reading about your sex life along with your treatise about drapes and your recipe for fruitcake, you are clearly a big ol' prude who denies that sexual pleasures exist.

David said...

Chip, you think you could animate that little riff? The world is waiting.

deborah said...

Chip, you put a little too much English on it. More like: With quiet joy I painted the brick fireplace deep red, with thoughts of sugarplums and cozy cuddling dancing in my head.

wyo sis said...

It's the new generation gap. Feminist radical mothers lamenting that their daughters want to become domestic goddesses after all they've done for them. How could they be so ungrateful?

edutcher said...

It just kills the Lefties that everybody doesn't dance to their tune, particularly on the obsession with sex.

Think jimbino.

Ann Althouse said...

I think one factor here is that it's just much harder to write about sex (without sounding ridiculous, I mean).

It's never stopped anybody.

Consider Oop.

kentuckyliz said...

In other news, women are still choosing their families over the crazy mega-hours it takes to be C suite.

Women love their husbands and children and homes.

It's a fucking outrage.

When feminism embraces the legitimacy of SAHM, they might regain a shred of relevance.

kentuckyliz said...

Mystery: only let a man see half your ass.

Perhaps we should be equally discretionary about our homes and recipes.

Palladian said...

There is something repulsively puritanical, something tellingly nihilistic, something debased and degraded, about the tendency to call all pleasurable images "porn".

deborah said...

Yes, Palladian, although I went with the quote, I dislike the now-colloquial use of the word porn. One step closer to civilization crawling up its own backside (TS Eliot).

AprilApple said...

Domestic bliss and the seeking of material comforts is over-rated.

AprilApple said...

Chuck Currie post #1. I never thought of that. You could be on to something.
Couple that with Clinton era mandatory forces to banks to relax loan eligibility - and bam. Crash.

AprilApple said...

manscaped.



edutcher said...

Palladian said...

There is something repulsively puritanical, something tellingly nihilistic, something debased and degraded, about the tendency to call all pleasurable images "porn".

Which says a lot about what the Lefties really want.

Rabel said...

"But who thought the online world would become so regressive and prudish, subverting the potential of both the bedroom and the Internet?"

I think I see the problem. She's got her parental control locked on and forgot the password.

Christy said...

Could this article reflect the bitterness of someone who never learned to pick up after herself and resents neatness in other homes? (And I confess, it took me decades to learn.) The kind of woman who denigrates with, "well if I had time on my hands, I could ...."

I love decorating blogs. Most are about comfort, smells, textures, tastes and color; many have music. Isn't that, by definition, sensual?

Yes, some go over the top. I barely stopped myself from buying a baby cake pop maker last week. But I still don't see the problem in an item that tickles the intended's fancy.

Erika said...

My point is that I can understand the pleasures of these domestic surfaces and taste and still wish ardently that women could find a more profound satisfaction in these "lifestyle" sets we've built.

Geez, what a busybody. Don't need your help with my sex life, Lauren Sandler! Thanks anyway!

Saint Croix said...

The reason people keep sex private is to foster intimacy. If you're blogging about your sex life, you're destroying any intimate relationship you are trying to create.


Renee said...

Never liked Pinterest, but watching episodes of Hoarders motivates me. No one expects anyone to be crafty, just to meet basic health codes.

Alex said...

If a woman isn't having daily explosive orgasms with jetstreams of fluid coming out then she really is dysfunctional.

galdosiana said...

I was immediately turned off as soon as she insisted that the only true "living" is through sex (see her beginning statement about lingerie), as if actually having a family and home to take care of is some kind of falsehood that should be avoided at all costs.

Anglelyne said...

But who thought the online world would become so regressive and prudish, subverting the potential of both the bedroom and the Internet?

Leftism: the haunting fear that some "puritan", somewhere, is having better sex than you're ever going to have. (pace Mencken)

Ms. Sandler seems to subscribe to the "are we having fun yet" school of sex. If I have sex and don't tell other people about it, did I enjoy myself?

Rabel: I think I see the problem. She's got her parental control locked on and forgot the password.

Ha. Not being able to find people being porny on the internet - something about "your own ass", "both hands", "not find" coming to mind here.

ginnad said...

So, let's get this straight. Married women who want their homes to be nice are ignoring their sexuality, and aren't interested in physical pleasure. But if they buy "50 Shades of Gray", they're told they have no taste, and shouldn't be reading 'mommy porn'.

There's no way to win here.

Marla Singer said...

She makes the assumption that the set of women who are interested in baked goods and throw pillows and the set of women who report having bad sex lives are the same or at least have significant overlap. She offers no evidence at all that that is the case, although she wants to infer that if the blogs don't talk about sex, then they must not be having sex. How did it come to pass that major media would publish an entire essay based on a completely warrantless assumption? Even leaving aside her very pathetic focus on sex as the only physical pleasure worth discussing, didn't an editor somewhere say, hey, do you have any evidence that these two groups of women overlap at all?