August 30, 2012

"I didn’t want to talk my son into not wearing dresses and skirts."

"He didn’t make friends in doing that in Berlin already and after a lot of contemplation I had only one option left: To broaden my shoulders for my little buddy and dress in a skirt myself."

66 comments:

sydney said...

How does that happen? That child looks too young to shop for his own clothes. Where did he get little dresses and skirts to fit him so that he could follow his natural inclination? Did he ask his parents to buy them? I'd like to know more.

Kathy said...

I completely love the father love.

What a lucky boy/girl - child to have such a loving father.

Would all the world be better with fathers like this? I sure believe it.

LordSomber said...

Sitzpinklers: The Next Generation.

Tyrone Slothrop said...

Whatever. I'm glad he's not my kid. I would have dressed him in clothes appropriate to his gender, at least until he reached the age of majority.

Rabel said...

He needs to teach the kid to wear shoes when walking on city streets.

mccullough said...

Freedom means freedom for everyone.

Sofa King said...

"I didn’t want to talk my son into not wearing dresses and skirts."

I have to wonder, why not?

TWM said...

"Would all the world be better with fathers like this?"

No.

chickelit said...

West Berlin, probably Kreuzberg too, the only section of West Berlin which actively militated for takeover by East Berlin during the Cold War.

JFK would roll in his grave (but probably snicker given how many skirts he chased).

netmarcos said...

Mental midgets abdicating parental responsibilty. Morally bankrupt and bereft of any sense of decency, they leave it to their minor children to show them the way...with all too predictable results.

Andy R. said...

I love the world that queer and transgressive people are creating. This makes me so happy.

DADvocate said...

I broaden my shoulders and tell my kids they can do whatever they want when they turn 18. Until then, I'm the boss.

Freedom means freedom for everyone.

The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius knows its limits. Congratulations in not limiting yourself.

TWM said...

"I love the world that queer and transgressive people are creating. This makes me so happy."

I've always wondered what it was like to be so easily amused.

Balfegor said...

Would all the world be better with fathers like this? I sure believe it.

No. Not doing his son any favours there -- children need to be taught to separate the public and the private, and learn that what is appropriate in public and what is appropriate in private are two vastly different and barely-related things.

That said, the child looks awfully young, young enough that in the good old days he'd still be dressed in dresses and frocks anyhow.

edutcher said...

5 will get you 10, it's Dad that wants to wear the skirt (look at the kid, for God's sake).

Balfegor said...

Also, they should be wearing shoes. That is not a beach. It is a cobblestone street.

Balfegor said...

No, I look again, and it is not cobblestones after all. Still, wear shoes in public.

Revenant said...

I knew a guy in college who, as A Statement About Gender, decided to start wearing skirts as a freshman.

The funny thing about this was that he didn't particularly like skirts, at least no more than any other form of clothing. But after a while he found himself almost *having* to wear skirts, because if he ever decided to wear shorts, slacks, or jeans people would immediately ask him "what happened". "Did you get beaten up? Was it because of homophobia? Was the social pressure to conform too strong?"

So in the end, he wore skirts because of peer pressure.

rehajm said...

I love the world that queer and transgressive people are creating.

The lad is only five, and hasn't yet made gender distinctions in dress. Having spent time around kids this age this behavior is neither queer nor transgressive.

And you have no idea hattie if he's going to grow up and play for team pink.

Shouting Thomas said...

Scam alert! The father is undoubtedly a con artist.

Anything endorsed by Gawker and Andy Santorum has to be a scam.

Child sex abuse by a PR hungry asshole using his son for attention.

Sorun said...

Until I was 8 or 10 or so, my mom bought my clothes and I wore what I had. Isn't that most boys' experience.

Where does this kid's parents fit in, other than in a skirt?

Shouting Thomas said...

You might want to recall the case of the Canadian kid whose parents played out this PR scam on him. I believe the bastards even castrated him.

He didn't dare challenge them until he was a teenager.

Shouting Thomas said...

The Canadian boy's name was, I believe, Brian Reimer.

You'd be amazed at what ideologues will do to their own son.

Sofa King said...

I love the world that queer and transgressive people are creating.

Is that what "T" in LGBT stands for? Transgressive?

"trans·gres·sive (trns-grsv, trnz-)
adj.
1. Exceeding a limit or boundary, especially of social acceptability."

Huh. Guess so!

Balfegor said...

RE: Sorun:

Until I was 8 or 10 or so, my mom bought my clothes and I wore what I had. Isn't that most boys' experience.

Yes most, but not all. There are sometimes young children -- male as well as female -- who have very decided preferences about what they want to wear. Which is fine! I've known children like that. I just think they ought to be taught to be respectful of other people when in public and to avoid making a scene. Guffawing at a lady running into a lamppost, for example, is rude behaviour in any child.

TWM said...

"Is that what "T" in LGBT stands for? Transgressive?

"trans·gres·sive (trns-grsv, trnz-)
adj.
1. Exceeding a limit or boundary, especially of social acceptability."

Huh. Guess so!"

It's an anything goes world I tell ya. Sheep are starting to get worried.

Andy R. said...

By the way, if you're wondering what radical queer activists are up to, I would say the number one priority is probably destroying the societally-imposed gender binary.

And while this kid is obviously not intentionally doing any kind of activism, the fawning and sympathetic portrayal that him and his father are getting in the media makes me think that the obsolete gender binary imposed by society will soon be discarded.

Balfegor said...

"Is that what "T" in LGBT stands for? Transgressive?

No, it's "transgender," i.e. people who are physically male but feel themselves to be, in some way, female. Or vice versa. It's Lesbian-Gay-Bisexual-Transgender.

I think there's another one that gets thrown in there nowadays to make it a five letter acronym, but I can't remember what it is.

Andy R. said...

Q for Queer.

Balfegor said...

RE: Andy R:

And while this kid is obviously not intentionally doing any kind of activism, the fawning and sympathetic portrayal that him and his father are getting in the media makes me think that the obsolete gender binary imposed by society will soon be discarded.

I dunno, I kind of think as long as we keep teaching sex ed that "gender binary" thing is going to emerge pretty naturally. That and elementary biology. Or, you know. Teenage hormones. Without re-engineering the biological organism I don't think you're going to be able to get around that.

Shouting Thomas said...

Andy, you are one stupid fuck. I've met a lot of your kind, and I'm not talking about being gay.

Balfegor said...

Q for Queer

How is Queer different from Gay (or Lesbian -- I've only ever heard it used for males, but is it gender specific?)

Shouting Thomas said...

World savers of all varieties are the lowest scum on earth.

Paddy O said...

I would say the number one priority is probably destroying the societally-imposed gender binary.

I would say the number one priority is to keep taking words so that, one day, every single word of English means wanting to have sex with someone that shares the same parts.

Then, people will have to submit to the transgressive conformity.

Paddy O said...

"the obsolete gender binary imposed by society will soon be discarded."

And the number two priority seems to be to oppose evolution. Who knew that Queer activists were anti-intellectual self-creationists.

It doesn't get more basic then survival, and thus procreation, of the species. But, I don't want to interfere in your beliefs, so we'll go with male and female being a society thing.

chickelit said...

Andy R. said...
By the way, if you're wondering what radical queer activists are up to, I would say the number one priority is probably destroying the societally-imposed gender binary.

Whew. I thought you were going to say something substantial like licking doorknobs or tainting blood supplies with HIV.


Tyrone Slothrop said...

Andy R. said...

By the way, if you're wondering what radical queer activists are up to, I would say the number one priority is probably destroying the societally-imposed gender binary.


Well, they can try, but I'll tell you right now it won't work. I think non-queers are fairly content with boinking the opposite sex, and vive la difference!.

chickelit said...

When my son was in 4th grade he wanted to wear a coat & tie to school. Of course we indulged him. California is oppressively laided-back normative.

dbp said...

"the obsolete gender binary imposed by society will soon be discarded"

So, if I was raised in a properly egalitarian society, could I have gotten pregnant?

Balfegor said...

Re: dbp

So, if I was raised in a properly egalitarian society, could I have gotten pregnant?

No, in brave new world which rejects obsolete gender binary all children will be decanted from axlotl tanks.

Andy R. said...

It doesn't get more basic then survival, and thus procreation, of the species.

So, if I was raised in a properly egalitarian society, could I have gotten pregnant?


Do any of you know what the difference between sex and gender is? There is a cool exciting world out there. Wouldn't it be fun to learn something about it?

Moose said...

Maybe the kid observed that the most masculine one in the family was his mother. I mean knowing Germans as I do...

holdfast said...

"By the way, if you're wondering what radical queer activists are up to, I would say the number one priority is probably destroying the societally-imposed gender binary."

More like just trying to destroy society, period.

I hope you like the replacement society that will fill the void when we no longer have a society or culture - here's a hint, it begins with "i" and it ends in a slam.

Moose said...

I liked the post on Sully's the other day - "Is being gay a survival trait".

Uh dude - can I explain something to you?

holdfast said...

@Balfegor

Is your name a killing word?

holdfast said...

@Moose:

In a world full of radical feminists, maybe. I mean, not survival for the species, but maybe for the individual's mental health?

Paddy O said...

Do any of you know what the difference between sex and gender is?

One is something that people do, the other is something that foreign languages have in order to tell you how to conjugate them and use them in a sentence.

Also, evolution is pretty clear about its own purposes. If you want to be anti-intellectual and believe in self-creationism, then more power to you. There's all sorts of fun, indeed, to have in anti-intellectual anti-evolutionism! You get to do want you want and tell reality to stuff it when it disagrees!

wef said...

Ah, the land of sterility. Advancing merrily along the path to....well, to shape without form, shade without color, paralyzed force, gesture without motion.

This father is a near-perfect study in paralyzed force, a last man ready with easy gestures without motion. And fewer grandchildren, likely. The world will be a better place.

Meanwhile, to keep in the spirit of the age, I am still trying to promote retroactive, post-natal abortion.

microcorsair said...

Balfegor,
No, in brave new world which rejects obsolete gender binary all children will be decanted from axlotl tanks.

Remember what axlotl tanks were finally revealed to be?

chickelit said...

Do any of you know what the difference between sex and gender is?

Gender is a grammatical construct--like German nouns, for example.

Sex is something chromosome-based, unless you're a tranny, interested in reparative surgery/therapy.

So why isn't your hero bashing der und die (we can leave das out of it because that's the real goal) instead of conventional dress codes?

Kelly said...

When I was five or six, I remember sitting in a large tree I'd climbed and wishing I was a boy. I wore boy clothes, had a super short haircut. My parents ignored it and I eventually became very girly.

Thank God that happened 40 years ago. Today my parents probably would have changed my name to a boys name and had me on the way to a sex change. Sometimes a phase is just a phase and is best dealt with by ignoring the behaviour.

Balfegor said...

Re: microcorsair:

Remember what axlotl tanks were finally revealed to be?

If you're conscious enough to ask whether you can get pregnant, pretty sure you're not an axlotl tank. But I suppose one would not put it past the dirty Tleilaxu.

Julie C said...

I have noticed a troubling trend among some parents these days. A kid expresses a passing interest in something (a sport or a hobby) and the parent swoops in and dials it up to the top of the meter: expensive summer camps which specialize in that sport or hobby, private lessons and tutors, or the purchase of all kinds of expensive equipment. The kid loses interest, and moves on to the next thing (as kids do) and the parent repeats the process.

Why the parents in this case just didn't say, "no, you aren't going to wear girls clothes" is not surprising. It's more about the parents patting themselves on the back and letting us all know how enlightened they think they are.

Somehow I think if the kid had asked to dress up as GI Joe everyday and carry a plastic machine gun his father would be mortified.

Balfegor said...

Re: chickelit:

So why isn't your hero bashing der und die (we can leave das out of it because that's the real goal) instead of conventional dress codes?

Wikipedia tells me grammatical gender is Genus in German, but sex-gender is Geschlecht (although I guess they also say grammatische Geschlecht for grammatical gender). Anyhow, why would you want to change a system that calls ein M├Ądchen DAS?

Sam L. said...

When I was about 4, my mom put my sister's dress on me, realized her mistake, and dressed me regular. Moms get distracted. This dad is not distracted.

I don't know what's going on, and I refuse to speculate.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

You know ....anymore most young children are dressing in a fairly gender neutral manner anyway. Jeans, tee shirts, tennis shoes. Except for the colors and perhaps some feminine or masculine cartoonish characters the clothing is almost identical.

You rarely see a young girl of the age of the kid in the story wearing dresses and skirts, UNLESS they are going to a function like church a wedding or something like that.

I call bullshit on this story.

Greg Hlatky said...

"I thought men like that shot themselves." - King George V

DADvocate said...

When I was five or six, I remember sitting in a large tree I'd climbed and wishing I was a boy. I wore boy clothes, had a super short haircut. My parents ignored it and I eventually became very girly.

Wow. You had me going for a minute. My oldest daughter (41) is named Kelly. I have 4 kids, 2 girls, 2 boys. Kelly could climb the best by far. She could climb anything.

Because she was small, she would climb tree to heights I couldn't go without breaking branches and playfully taunt me. She would climb the door frames to people's front doors, knock and wait to see their look of surprise when they opened the door.

She is now happily married and has two kids. Guess it's a good thing I didn't buy that strap-on and get her to wear it since she was such a tomboy.

Revenant said...

I would say the number one priority is probably destroying the societally-imposed gender binary

Like the saying goes -- conservatives don't believe in evolution, liberals don't believe in biology.

Sex is biological. Gender is mostly biological, too. :)

kentuckyliz said...

sex is bio
gender is socio

MayBee said...

Munchhausen By Proxy again.

Dad says, "Look at me! Look at me! Look at what a forward thinking and supportive dad I am. Do you see? Do you see how positively selfless I am? I mean, just look at me being selfless."

Shana said...

Sex is bio , gender is linguistic, as in mensa is feminine, hortus is masculine, and vallum is neuter.

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Rusty said...

Andy R. said...

By the way, if you're wondering what radical queer activists are up to, I would say the number one priority is probably destroying the societally-imposed gender binary.



You know that's a self limiting paradigm, right?

prairie wind said...

Words have gender. People have sex.

Methadras said...

At this age who cars. My daughter wore Batman, Superman, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles boys underwear when she was a kid. Hell, we got a call from her kindergarten teacher telling us that she was peeing standing up and didn't make a mess. That made me proud.