May 18, 2011

Adult baby throws a tantrum when he hears of a threat to his SSI payments.

"You wanna test how damn serious I am about leaving this world, screw with my check that pays for this apartment and food. Try it. See how serious I am. I don’t care... I have no problem killing myself. Take away the last thing keeping me here, and see what happens. Next time you see me on the news, it will be me in a body bag."

127 comments:

BarryD said...

Given our massive Federal budget problems, and the significance of entitlement spending, he should think through whether this really works as a threat.

GMay said...

Making the rather large assumption that this carbon polluter is actually serious about carrying through with suicide, let me be the first to state the obvious - at least he won't be sucking on the government or mommy's teat anymore.

John said...

Good riddance.

Coketown said...

Coburn is right. The guy goes to Home Depot, buys lumber, builds himself scaled-up baby equipment, etc. He's perfectly capable of working full time instead of playing with blocks and having stories read to him. The sooner someone gives him a toy with choking hazards, the better.

I'm all for social safety nets that help the truly desperate. It's people like this--and not grandma receiving Meals on Wheels as progressives like to say--who should be booted out of the system to try to keep the whole bloated system solvent.

mesquito said...

SSI is probably the most corrupt program in the whole federal budget.

KenK said...

Just leave it be. It's probably cheaper than any other alternative. At least he's secure and off the street. I wouldn't wanting him joining the "millionaires club" of the homeless.

Larry J said...

This guy is the poster child for the welfare system. He is the living embodiment of the welfare mindset, a coddled, spoiled child.

Meanwhile, my handicapped brother won't apply for SSI because he can still work after a fashion.

WV: foopu - what he can do with his suicide threat

Blue@9 said...

"Next time you see me on the news, it will be me in a body bag."


No complaints here.

Maguro said...

This reminds me of the Bubble Boy episode on Seinfeld.

Moops!

Grant said...

Geez...What a baby.

Michelle Dulak Thomson said...

A very large body bag.

Golly.

wv: zester.

Jay said...

I'm pretty sure that is either garage or kookie...

dbp said...

The "adult baby" is making me rethink my opposition to assisted suicide.

BEK477 said...

Self-Operated Death Panels. Does the The Chosen One know that this is an option?
Will government encourage suicide to solve the debt crisis?
End the US Dlr debt crisis by encouraging self-prescribed death events for Boomers and the Greatest Generation. No man, no problem. I guess we could refer to it as delayed abortion. Sort-of a completionof the circle. Abort the unborn first and then abort the elderly you manged to escape abortion.

Is anyone amazed to see tha tthe common tie between two classes is the governemnt. I guess it is all about the 'Benjamins' after all.

bagoh20 said...

Where are the pedophiles when you need them? This guy needs a new sugar daddy.

edutcher said...

Don't let the door hit you...

jimbino said...

Hey, we all have equal rights to suck at the socialist tit: heteros do it when they get married (gaining over 1000 benefits), couples when they breed, take tax credits, and send their kids to public school, White folks when they enjoy national parks and forests that no Blacks, Hispanics or Native Americans attend.

Indeed, from what I've seen, it is only the hardworking illegal alien who doesn't suck at the tit but who instead contributes through taxes and SS and Medicare premiums with no promise of ever benefiting personally.

NotYourTypicalNewYorker said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Geoff Matthews said...

At first, I thought this was a senior citizen worried about losing social security. I was prepared to show some sympathy.
Not now. This 'man' (only for the sake of DNA and age) has wasted his life. Why should we supplement it?
I want to hear that argument from him.

RuyDiaz said...

"Next time you see me on the news, it will be me in a body bag."

Do not tempt me.

Coketown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Coketown said...

Indeed, from what I've seen, it is only the hardworking illegal alien who doesn't suck at the tit

Ha. Hahaha. HAHAHA!!! That assertion is absurd.

Prey tell, how do illegal aliens contribute to social security and Medicare premiums when their wages are off the books? I'd like to know how that works.

Republican said...

The crybaby needs his ass paddled by Uncle Sam.

Tibore said...

WTF?? When I saw "adult baby", I thought it was just a euphemism for someone crying about something to do with Social Security. I had no idea that the term "adult baby" was actually a description of a lifestyle choice.

The guy doesn't sound disabled either. From an MSNBC link on the same dude:
"When 29-year-old Stanley gets home from a hard day at work, he just wants to kick back with a nice bottle of milk, his pacifier and maybe play around with some Legos. As an "adult baby," the California man likes to pretend he's an infant, while being cared for by his roommate, a former nurse. It's called infantalism, and although for many it can be a kind of sexual fetish, that's not the case for Stanley, he tells National Geographic.

"For most of us, you're doing it to relax, you come home from work, and you change into baby mode, and, you know, you put away all your adult stuff and everything gets on hold," explains Stanley, who's been doing this since he was 14."


What the fuck? I mean, seriously: What. The. Fuck?

Jenny said...

All I can say is "Go for it, dude."

gutless said...

I'd be willing to run that risk.

RuyDiaz said...

Tibore:

I had my 'wtf' moment a few months ago. Learned about teabagging from Anderson Cooper, and first knew about 'Golden Showers' from a science/journalism book, not long ago.

I've been considering taking up drinking.

Revenant said...

One less mouth to feed.

RuyDiaz said...

P.S. The book is As Nature Made Him: The Boy Who Was Raised as a Girl, a powerful, moving book.

enicar333 said...

It is people like this "adult baby" that make me a fan of the precepts found on the Georgia Guidestones.

http://thegeorgiaguidestones.com/Message.htm
1. MAINTAIN HUMANITY UNDER 500,000,000 IN PERPETUAL BALANCE WITH NATURE


2. GUIDE REPRODUCTION WISELY - IMPROVING FITNESS AND DIVERSITY

Ann Althouse said...

You people are heartless.

Jason (the commenter) said...

After reading that I'm suddenly dead set on screwing with people's SSI payments.

jimbino said...

Coketown, you need to get out more, where you might learn that there are lots of White married breeders who earn wages off the books and loads of illegals who fake or steal SS numbers so that they can contribute to your retirement, expecting nothing in return. And they pay property taxes, either directly or indirectly as renters that pay for your Amerikan kids' miseducation.

enicar333 said...

Social Security is not a "right" either, it is a TAX. Just like medicare. All taxes go to the general revenue fund and are spent, there is no "trust fund". Here is what the Court said about Social Security:

"To engraft upon the Social Security system a concept of "accrued property rights" would deprive it of the flexibility and boldness in adjustment to ever-changing conditions which it demands. See Wollenberg, "Vested Rights in Social-Security Benefits," 37 Ore. L. Rev. 299, 359. It was doubtless out of an awareness of the need for such flexibility that Congress included in the original Act, and has since retained, a clause expressly reserving to it "[t]he right to alter, amend, or repeal any provision" of the Act. § 1104, 49 Stat. 648, 42 U.S.C. § 1304. That provision makes express what is implicit in the institutional needs of the program. See "Analysis of the Social Security System," Hearings before a Subcommittee of the Committee on Ways and Means, House of Representatives, 83d Cong., 1st Sess., pp. 920-921. It was pursuant to that provision that § 202(n) was enacted."

http://www.ssa.gov/OP_Home/rulings/oasi/23/SSCD60-01-oasi-23.html

Good Riddance, Indeed!!

D. R. said...

Heartless? I dunno - are they any more sincere in their death wishes than Mr. Baby is with his threats?

Blue@9 said...

"You people are heartless."

My heart is beating just fine.

And look ma, no diapers!

ken in sc said...

I knew a guy who owned a cabinet shop. He had a pretty good worker who worked for him, but his wife claimed to have agoraphobia. She was afraid to leave the house. She applied for SSI and disability because of it. After about two years her application was approved. He quit his job and they started living off her checks and were seen driving all around town on a daily basis. She no longer seemed to be afraid to leave the house. This is an example of a broken system.

art.the.nerd said...

> Ann Althouse said...
> You people are heartless.

In this context, I'll take that as a compliment.

jimbino said...

Coketown and others seem to ignore the simple fact that most children of illegal aliens who attend school in CA and elsewhere are Amerikan citiizens, just as entitled to feed at the public education tit as are the brats of the "real" Amerikans!

Here in Texas, I give work to any person who shows up at my door ready and willing to put in a day's work. Funny that that person is never a "real" Amerikan, teenager or otherwise. If I had my druthers, my $2500 in property taxes that go to public miseduation annually would never be spent on one of those useless "real" Amerikan brats, but on the progeny of the working illegal aliens!

The way to stop the tit abuse is to start cutting off the tits, in which case I'll wager that I'll still be employing the illegals who show up at my door, potty-trained and eager to work.

enicar333 said...

Once again, here is the TRUTH about the tax called Social Security - staright from Social Security:

"The fact that workers contribute to the Social Security program's funding through a dedicated payroll tax establishes a unique connection between those tax payments and future benefits. More so than general federal income taxes can be said to establish "rights" to certain government services. This is often expressed in the idea that Social Security benefits are "an earned right." This is true enough in a moral and political sense. But like all federal entitlement programs, Congress can change the rules regarding eligibility--and it has done so many times over the years. The rules can be made more generous, or they can be made more restrictive. Benefits which are granted at one time can be withdrawn, as for example with student benefits, which were substantially scaled-back in the 1983 Amendments."

http://www.ssa.gov/history/nestor.html

Someday I will figure out how to use HTML, until then you will have to suffer.

Chef Mojo said...

You people are heartless.

Well, yeah. Point being?

Hey, Stanley! About that suicide threat? A thermite rigged binky outta do the trick.

Irene said...

Were Senator Coburn to spend a few afternoons watching episodes of Judge Judy, he would have an even better understanding of American SSI recipients.

CraftD said...

Bye Bye Baby.

Pastafarian said...

Maguro said: "This reminds me of the Bubble Boy episode on Seinfeld."

That's funny, because a Seinfeld reference came to me too -- with respect to his threat of suicide, I thought of the Seinfeldism, "That's a shame."

Althouse, I can never tell whether you're being sarcastic. Just in case you're not: We who work trade pieces of our life for money, and the government takes that money, equivalent to hours from my finite life that I have to spend working instead of spending with my wife or my children, and they give it to Adult Baby so that he can turn formula into poop.

Heartless? Yes, I think you're being facetious and I'm being thick. Nevermind.

Peano said...

No "Suicide is murder" sermonette? Le professeur misses a preachable moment.

Roman said...

This excuse doesn't have the 'nads to do himself any physical harm. It's too bad taxpayers have been keeping him in anything.

MarkD said...

The downside to this is what?

edutcher said...

enicar333 said...

Someday I will figure out how to use HTML, until then you will have to suffer.

Try w3c.org or w3schools.com/html/default.asp

Pastafarian said...

LarryJ said: "This guy is the poster child for the welfare system. He is the living embodiment of the welfare mindset, a coddled, spoiled child."

I can't improve on this. I just wanted to repeat it.

We should literally posterize this guy. If someone here with talent can design such a poster, I'll chip in for printing costs. Or are actual physical posters obsolete at this point? I'll chip in for banner ads then. Hell, maybe we can replace the bloody meat ad right here on the Althouse blog.

ic said...

He has no problem killing himself. Go for it, I say. We must encourage him, and buy him the necessary means to do the job, the only job worthwhile he'll ever do.

Fort said...

Very interesting. Two sides, both serious and convincing, at least on the surface, claim opposing things, at least to some extent:

1. Food prices rising causes instability on a global scale unseen by other causes of instability (anyone who agrees with this should hate Ethanal I would presume, their self-interest aside).

2. Those who feel entitled, no matter how well off or overfed from sucking on the public teat, are a greater threat to global stability, circa 2011 (and By Gosh that's an important point), than those starving, or those who might just perhaps starve.

I'm in camp two, after the Greeks burned the pregnant banker and her coworkers, but not after reading Useful Idiots alone, which I did years ago.

Although both of the immediate preceding examples are to some extent vicarious, the former happened in my lifetime and many events in Mona Charen's book happened before I was born, so in a certain sense I see one as more "real" than the other to me.

Chuck said...

"hasta la vista, baby."

Phil 3:14 said...

Needs to go into time out

chickenlittle said...

Ann Althouse said...
You people are heartless.

And your heart bleeds for him?

dbp said...

I've given this guy a re-think and he is really very shrewd:

He has desires which just about everyone views as somewhere on the spectrum between perverse and pathetic. And yet he has found a way for the public to underwrite his lifestyle.

Well played Mr. adult baby!

Till now that is. The biggest mistake a criminal can make is becoming famous.

hawkeyedjb said...

"You people are heartless."

Yes, but not stupid. A problem comes up with its own solution and we're smart enough to take it.

Jason (the commenter) said...

Althouse: You people are heartless.

He wants me to be his slave, to pay for his lifestyle with my blood and tears, and then threatens to kill himself if the burden is lifted just a little from my shoulders.

You pay my taxes for me and I will moarn for him like my true love died.

Bob said...

"Faster please."

Peano said...

Althorse: You people are heartless.

Damn straight! I mean really, now. Upon my soul! Here is a man so distressed he is threatening MURDER. M U R D E R!!!

Well, yeah, OK, self-murder. But it's still MURDER! M U R D E R!!!

Whatsamatta wichoo peeps???

windbag said...

"You wanna test how damn serious I am about leaving this world, screw with my check that pays for this apartment and food. Try it. See how serious I am. I don’t care... I have no problem killing myself. Take away the last thing keeping me here, and see what happens. Next time you see me on the news, it will be me in a body bag."

I don't think he's man enough to make good on this threat.

Jay Retread said...

This guy neeDs to get his fat ass out on the street and find a job. Althouse needs to stop raping the WI taxpayers to the tune of $160,000.00 through tenure abuse.

Mark said...

His threat sounds like a win-win situation to me.

Freeman Hunt said...

Hey, we all have equal rights to suck at the socialist tit: heteros do it when they get married (gaining over 1000 benefits), couples when they breed

The only way to contribute to your own social security is to have kids. The money you pay in pays for current recipients, not yourself.

RuyDiaz said...

There is something that bothers me: they are receiving social security, true. They applied for it, did whatever you have to do, then get their check. My question is: why would anybody in their right mind do that? Receiving SS 'disability' is half a death sentence. It is close to giving up on life. If you are in such a borderline situation, shouldn't you spend your energies in trying to become a productive member of society, if only for your own good?

X-Ray Tetra said...

Ann Althouse said...
You people are heartless.

LOL

I hope you aren't serious.

RuyDiaz said...

The only way to contribute to your own social security is to have kids. The money you pay in pays for current recipients, not yourself.

And 'contributing' is the right word: the system socializes your children, making them work for everybody else.

You sure hope they turn into kind, loving children, who will be your solace in your old age.

RuyDiaz said...

LOL

I hope you aren't serious.


Thought it was obvious she was playing along.

Peano said...

Freeman Hunt said...
The money you pay in [to Social Security] pays for current recipients, not yourself.


Precisely. It is a transfer system.

Henry said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Henry said...

Hey, we all have equal rights to suck at the socialist tit: heteros do it when they get married (gaining over 1000 benefits), couples when they breed, take tax credits, and send their kids to public school, White folks when they enjoy national parks and forests that no Blacks, Hispanics or Native Americans attend.

Well ranted. I do wonder what kind of unit "benefits" is. How many benefits in a peck?

I hate the deductions, credits, and write-offs gamesmanship. Offer me a flat tax and I'll take it. I hate the promises the government makes with no funds to cover them. Give me the option to opt-out of self-employment tax and cradle-to-grave cosseting at the same time and I'll take it. Let me opt out of property taxes and I'll happily send my kids to private school.

Can you make that happen?

No?

Alex said...

Althouse says... hehehehehe more red meat for Althouse hillbillies!

AprilApple said...

We need a nation of adult babies (D). That will fix us.
Go welfare state and high taxes!

Alex said...

We should have more generous welfare benefits in line with Europe. Just soak the rich.

bagoh20 said...

"The only way to contribute to your own social security is to have kids."

Now that is heartless - to produce children so as to provide for your lifestyle after you are no longer useful.

Why not just breed them for spare organs too.

True love would require raising them until you are no longer contributing to the system, and then offing yourself, but maybe I just love too much.

DADvocate said...

During the 5 years I worked at a mental health center, SSI freeloaders were fairly common. Generally, they had a relative minor problem and decided to use to to avoid work and responsibility. Simply another form of welfare.

The process of applying for it was nearly always the same. Apply and get rejected, get a slimy lawyer that specializes in SSI, re-apply, get rejectd, apply again, get SSI. They always got SSI on the third try.

After that, keeping SSI benefits is mostly a rubber stamp process and nobody bugs you to find work like they do on regular welfare. Sweet deal for the minimally ambitious.

Peter Hoh said...

Althouse said...
You people are heartless.

Hey, we need all the Kumbaya moments we can get.

Blue@9 said...

"Receiving SS 'disability' is half a death sentence. It is close to giving up on life. If you are in such a borderline situation, shouldn't you spend your energies in trying to become a productive member of society, if only for your own good?"


Hey, passivity is the ultimate calling for some.

Sabinal said...

for a baby he's rather a grownup when it comes to his free gravy train stopping.

He has no one to blame but himself; and of course he's using the "abuse" excuse. Please. His lazy butt (and that's all it is)just doesn't want to work and is willing to take money away from the truly ill. I think the Man Upstairs has some special plans for him.

You know what would be great? if he had to meet face to face with people who were really sick and could not get SSI because he and others like him took it away

Chip S. said...

The guy has the right concept, but poor execution. If you're gonna spend your adult life being suckled, at least find a nice pair of tits to latch on to. Then you can generate serious ad revenue from your webcam site instead of being a burden on society.

AJ Lynch said...

It would be eye-opening if the guvmint would regularly publish statistics on the number of people on Soc Sec plus new recipients minus those that died and the number of applicants and the number of apps rejected. Etc.

I think we'd be all a bit shocked at how common these money grab schemes are.

Amartel said...

Must lie down: overwhelmed by largeness of target, abundance of possible slings and arrows.

This is The Poster Child (yes!) for overentitled, overempowered, underworked, status quo America. Gimmmmah mah free monnnnayyyy ann don disturb mah deluuuussions.

John Burgess said...

To demonstrate how heartless we aren't, let's take up a collection for a size 12XL body bag.

andinista said...

SSI is the bribe paid to the urban core to keep them from rioting. SSI is corrupt. Anyone can get an SSI determination, there are doctors that specialize in it. The SocSecAdmin will not deny it. The SSA despises means-testing. Putting people on SSI satisfies the two bureaucratic core imperatives: perform the mission, and preserve the organization.

When SSI and Food Stamps benefits get cut by 20% (as they soon must, we cannot keep borrowing from China), and the Federal employees pay is cut by 20%, they will riot. In Madison, in LA, in every large city in the country. You had best be ready to defend your home and family, when the hungry mob comes down your street looting and burning, chanting "This is what democracy looks like!"

Don't Tread 2012 said...

@Maguro

"Moops!"

LOL. Its 'moors'!!!

@Ann

"You people are heartless."

OK. Accepting your premise, its called 'tough love'. And I don't believe for a minute that you are serious.

jeff said...

"And they pay property taxes, either directly or indirectly as renters that pay for your Amerikan kids' miseducation."


No matter what point someone is trying to make, as soon as I see the "Amerikan" it immediately flags the commenter as a complete dumbass and whatever position that person is taking, it is undoubtedly the most retarded position one could take. So I guess it does have a positive function as a indicator you can safely ignore whatever drivel that person is trying to present. So he's got that going for him.

Chip S. said...

"You people are heartless."

DT2010, The woman simply refuses to use ironic italics.

wv scalicta: side comment by a certain SC Justice

Rick said...

We know Obama thinks providing care for this jerk is what makes America special. I'm for him making good on his promise.

B said...

'You people are heartless.'

Nope. Pragmatic.

mythusmage said...

First, let me point out that sometimes a person on SSI can do some work, without being employable.

Second, I don't know enough about the subject to give a meaningful opinion about him.

Ralph L said...

... national parks and forests that no Blacks, Hispanics or Native Americans attend
Thank goodness there are still some places that keep the rabble out.

Dustin said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ann Althouse said...

"Althouse, I can never tell whether you're being sarcastic."

Strangely enough, I couldn't tell either!

andinista said...

Has it been that long? Have you forgotten the strategies of crybabies? They fall down, go boom, look around to see if anybody noticed, only if someone is looking at them with concern do they burst into tears. Have you forgotten how to wean a child, and how they behave when they are being weaned?

The only way to help this tragic fool is to show him the wolf at his door. You want to stop his pitiful mewling, you're free to open your wallet. Just don't make us also. Or try to shame us into it. There's no shame in letting a con artist starve.

Beorn said...

I thought this was a story linking to more protests by Unions in Wisconsin...

Fred4Pres said...

Spank that fat baby.

This is obviously performance art, but it might be cathartic.

Fred4Pres said...

If Meade ever acted like that, Ann would have him on the curb pretty darn quick.

Terry said...

Jimbino wrote:
If I had my druthers, my $2500 in property taxes that go to public miseduation annually would never be spent on one of those useless "real" Amerikan brats, but on the progeny of the working illegal aliens!

When I was in Wisconsin last year (Osceola), the local Dairy Queen was manned by white teenagers. They worked decently for minimum wage, and as far as I could tell, they even seemed to be having fun. The problem is clearly not a poor non-illegal-alien work ethic. It must be a Texas thing.

AllenS said...

DADvocate said...
The process of applying for it was nearly always the same. Apply and get rejected, get a slimy lawyer that specializes in SSI, re-apply, get rejectd, apply again, get SSI. They always got SSI on the third try.

Not only that, but when they eventually get the check, the first payment will be big, because it will start when the claim was first filed. If it takes 2, 3 years for the final approval, the first check will be big enough for a nice pick up truck. I have two friends who did this. They think that it was owed to them. Because, well just because...

Comrade X said...

good lord people, it's not a choice. he was born that way.

Triangle Man said...

You people are heartless.

"You people"? Such language Madame! In my day there was no more scurrilous insult than "you people".

Don't Tread 2012 said...

@DADvocate

"Apply and get rejected, get a slimy lawyer that specializes in SSI..."

Is it me, or is there almost always a lawyer behind someone gaming the system?

I reject your usage of the modifier 'slimy', its unfair to slime molds and their culture(s).

wv - derspee

Derspee on the toilet seat.

Quaestor said...

Better heartless than brainless, Professor Atlhouse.

rocketeer67 said...

... national parks and forests that no Blacks, Hispanics or Native Americans attend

Huh. Jimbino must visit different national parks and forests than I do. I've seen plenty of blacks, hispanic, and native American visitors the national parks and forests I've been to.

I'll give you the benefit of a doubt though, Jimbino, since I'm sure it's very hard to get an accurate picture of what goes on out in the real world from the closed confined of your mother's basement.

Seeing Red said...

We come into the world wearing diapers.....a lot of us go out wearing diapers.


The real issue is his burper.

Giving that service away for free, tsk, tsk. I hear people get paid really well for "burping."

Rich B said...

When the SSI runs out, there's a job at the DNC for this guy writing slogans for 2012. Call upChuck Schumer.

jimbino said...

Well, Terry, you may have noticed that Texas is the epicenter of immigration, so what happens here in that regard is more indicative of the immigration situation than what happens in your backwater state. Not to mention that Texas has four of the fourteen largest cities in the country and your backwater state doesn't even have two.

If you did come to Texas with your eyes open, you will notice that, of all the beggars on the street corners holding signs pretending to "work for food," none is a Black or Hispanic, male or female. Almost all are White men.

And, Rockateer, I have deliberately tallied the presence of the various races at numerous national parks, forests and monuments over the past 20 years, as well as the presence of minority Amerikan tourists in Ken Burns documentary on the National Parks. You are wrong, and I'll bet you a dollar to a donut you won't find anywhere near the attendance of our minorities that would correspond to their slice of the Amerikan population that pays for those fiascos. It is, in fact, a serious embarrassment that the Interior Department recognizes and has admitted. Open your eyes.

AprilApple said...

Only people with big hearts like to break the economy. It's for the best. Where's my nipple?

Rialby said...

Go watch "The Wild and Wonderful Whites of West Virginia". All of those meth-head, redneck, white trash mountain people get money from SSI. But, nobody can find a dollar of waste in the federal budget.

traditionalguy said...

This guy is using baby 101 tactics that parents usually start to ignore after age 16-23. The message is " give me what I want or I will destroy myself." That doesn't threaten a normal parent. But it does threaten a parent whose emotional needs are being met by the child. That is an evil parent.

Yu-Ain Gonnano said...

Alternate Title: "Adult Baby Throws Tantrum, Threatens to Hold Breath if SSI Payments Stop".

Quaestor said...

Yes it's true, my friends, I have no heart. I am utterly without pity for adult babies who threaten suicide when their entitlement income is questioned. A normal person would be moved to tears by the plight of poor Stanley Thorton, Jr. A normal person would not only defend his right to a comfortable living at public expense, but would damn any soulless Republican martinet who would dare question the adult baby lifestyle choice as grounds for a hefty SSI check each and every month to the outer darkness of political oblivion. A normal person would likely wire young Master Thorton the money ear marked for next month's mortgage payment to ease the titanic toddler's existential angst.

But I'm not normal. I can't empathize with anybody with a full complement of functional limbs who receives an income for doing squat. In fact the thought of Stanley Thorton in a body bag only provokes pity for the person whose duty it would be to lift said bag into the meat wagon.

But it's not my fault; I was born this way. I'm just another tragic sufferer of CCF, the silent killer of welfare parasite empathy. Chronic Compassion Fatigue, (better known as CCF) afflicts million of American adults, yet goes untreated due to fear of discrimination and social ostracism. Victims of prejudice and abuse for decades we were openly labeled as "mother-starvers," "grinches," "adult baby killers," and many other vile names too hurtful to mention here. Faced with expulsion from polite society if we expressed our views as nature evidently intended we should, we went underground, living a lie except in the privacy of the voting booth.

Well, we're out of the voting booth now, baby! (Though we'll return whenever given an opportunity) We won't put up with being labeled or libeled by you soi-disant normal people anymore. We prefer to be called glum people, because we can't agree with the notion that people have a right to be happy at public expense.

We don't know why we are the way we are, some say it's genetic, others theorize our mother read macroeconomics textbooks while pregnant with us. But we don't care. We're glum, and we've always been glum. Some researches believe a cure for CCF can be found, but most of us glum people are indifferent if not openly hostile to the notion we need to be cured of anything. Glumness is just a fact of our person-hood. Get use to it. And get your hands out of our pockets.

Quaestor said...

typo correction: used to it.

rocketeer67 said...

And, Rockateer, I have deliberately tallied the presence of the various races at numerous national parks, forests and monuments over the past 20 years, as well as the presence of minority Amerikan tourists in Ken Burns documentary on the National Parks

Really, Jimbino? You went to the Grand Canyon, and spent your time tallying minority visitors? God, you're a vapid bore.

But I can't help but ask - did you see me? How did you "tally" me? Did I count in as white, black, or native American? If you were keeping "score" accurately, you would have counted me in each category. But that wuld have been impossible, since you can't tell a man's "race" by looking at him.

Original Mike said...

"I have no problem killing myself."

I have no problem with you killing yourself, either.

(Haven't read the comments yet. I suspect I am not alone.)

Robert said...

I had heard that SSI "fraud" massively increased after welfare reform, but this is silly. (Whether it's fraud or an intentional effort by bureaucrats to shift welfare takers onto SSI is up for debate.)

Meanwhile, since anecdotes are fun, my friend's husband is a quadriplegic from a car accident that happened over one year ago. He has not yet been approved for SSI and, during his last "interview" conducted at bedside, the bureaucrat asked him what his plan was to return to work.

Coming soon to your doctor's office too. Socialism is awesome!

Amartel said...

"I'll bet you a dollar to a donut you won't find anywhere near the attendance of our minorities that would correspond to their slice of the American pie that pays for those fiascos. It is, in fact, a serious embarrassment that the Interior Department recognizes and has admitted. Open your eyes."

There is so much wrong in this. It assumes that private decision-making by ethnic and racial minorities about vacation destinations should be subject to government investigation . . . and correction! That the government, and all of us for that matter, should be embarrassed that ethnic and racial minorities supposedly do not visit national parks in proportion to "their slice of the American pie that pays for these fiascos." First, it's just not your business where other people go on vacation. Second, a government program is either a good investment of taxpayer money or not independent of the racial/ethnic background of the citizens who decide to take advantage of it. Right? Right?

Maybe you should open YOUR eyes and think about why it matters so very much to YOU what other people do in their spare time, and while you're at it, what about this weird obsession with counting people up and tracking their leisure activities by race. Also, stalking minorities at national parks? Seriously? Did you actually stand around at a national park and tally up the black people? Freak. Lastly, calling it "Amerika" = "I am a massive tool."

Ralph L said...

It is, in fact, a serious embarrassment
Jimbino, do you really think someone is keeping minorities from going to the national parks?
Why would Interior be embarrassed? Do their strollers get stuck on the access roads? Not enough changing tables? Hiking boots not available in baby sizes?

Jay said...

I loved this:

you will notice that, of all the beggars on the street corners holding signs pretending to "work for food," none is a Black or Hispanic, male or female. Almost all are White men.

Seriously, is this a parody?

rocketeer67 said...

Seriously, is this a parody?

Maybe it's a west coast thing. He's obviously never been to Boston.

pst314 said...

Or to Chicago.

pst314 said...

...but probably he just likes to invent "facts".

pst314 said...

Still not sure why Ann Althouse thinks we should feel sympathy for a parasite.

jimbino said...

The biggest parasites in Amerika are the breeders, without doubt. And if their brood turns out to be White, they get to attend our public universities subsidized by the Blacks, Hispanics, Native Amerikans, singles, gays and illegal immigrants among us.

pst314 said...

"...but probably he just likes to invent 'facts'."

Correction: ...likes to invent 'facts' when not masturbating to copies of the Revolutionary Worker.

Juba Doobai! said...

Let's screw with his SSI payments.

RED' said...

What a sad life. I would be jumping forv joy to not be disabiled or to make enough to support my needs. I have heard this brat had a bad childhood whhaAAAAAAAAAAAAA cry me a river and build a bridge and get over it! I have serve Cerebral Palsy trying earn my PhD, work a business and non-profit. Today, it took me 45 minutes to get ready. I hope they cut Stanley off or if he needs to be a baby we have adult foster care, I am sure we could find him foster parents.

Celeste said...

I say if he wants to kill himself because he's too lazy to go find a job, let him do it. He has no disability. All he wants to do is freeload off of taxpayer money and have people pity him. He's only wasting his life by sitting around, drinking from bottles, wearing diapers, and having his "mommy" coddle him and read him stories.

This guy needs to grow up.