January 23, 2010

Once, it was 20-hour sex sessions.

Then, it tapered off. And now, Brangelina is no more.

54 comments:

Moose said...

Ah well. Angelina can always go back to her brother...

careen said...

It reaffirms my belief that there is *always* something better than marriage *if* you're really at the top of your game - which oddly warms my heart.

Marriage is a nice retirement plan, however. And I'm charmed down to my tippy-toes when I meet an engaged early 20-something couple who have been actively building a life together since high school - as I just did this christmas. If you're going to do it, that's the most perfect version of the high wire act. It would take a tremendous amount of faith but the payoffs are huge. You'll always be with someone who knew you when you were young and vice versa.

DADvocate said...

Now I can move in on Angelina, but I've gotta break it off from Jennifer first.

Peter V. Bella said...

Who cares. Just bobble headed morons whose only talent is reading teleprompters for movies. Sort of like some feller in Washington.

SteveR said...

Easy cum, easy go.

El Pollo Real said...

LOL SteveR!

Lem said...

Marriage is a nice retirement plan, however.

I got my right hand man in charge of my retirement ;)

Seven Machos said...

If you are that attractive and aren't serious about settling down with a family, why get married? And especially why have kids?

I mean, really. Go out and have sex. It's always fun the first time.

Peano said...

It's all about Brad and Angelina. Never mind their children. Family values.

Lem said...

It reaffirms my belief that there is *always* something better than marriage *if* you're really at the top of your game - which oddly warms my heart.

Nobody wants a 'family'

Why have children when you can just get them in Haiti or Africa?

Pogo said...

"They flaunt their conjugal felicity in one's face, as if it
were the most fascinating of sins.
"
Oscar Wilde

Seven Machos said...

Brad Pitt should go out and get laid by a different reasonably hot chick 330 times this year.

Paul said...

I knew the marriage was in trouble when Brad started putting those braids in his goatee. Every time I've seen a guy do that, he's divorced three months later.

Lem said...

Are we enjoying this breakup..

As we would enjoy the crashing of Air America?

John Lynch said...

Hey, that lasted a long time in celebrity years!

Diana said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lem said...

Hey, that lasted a long time in celebrity years!

In Napolitanese 'the marriage worked'.

d-day said...

Glancing at the headline, I assumed this was an Andrew Sullivan post. So, so glad to be mistaken

Word Verification, I kid you not: "bagger"

Freeman Hunt said...

She says she sometimes gets mad enough that she tears his shirt.

That's pretty mad.

Fred4Pres said...

I am not buying the 20 hour sex sessions. But they have a lot of kids so I wish them well on this. It must be difficult.

El Pollo Real said...

I knew the marriage was in trouble when Brad started putting those braids in his goatee. Every time I've seen a guy do that, he's divorced three months later

I wondered what was up with that but thought it might be for a film. They're for real though? What are they, some sign of solidarity with the third world:"horn-rows"? Yeesh.
I do feel sorry for the the kids, but otherwise, their Schade is kinda my Freude.

Lem said...

I am not buying the 20 hour sex sessions.

I got a bootleg.. just send me an e-mail I'm sure we can work something out ;)

Lem said...

She says she sometimes gets mad enough that she tears his shirt.

And she a UN ambassador?

Lem said...

Brangelina will survive.

BJM said...

Had Brangelina taken up cross country skiing all would be well.

William said...

Money. Fame. Good Looks. Great Sex. And they end up miserable together. There don't seem to be any sure fire qualifiers for domestic bliss. Well, a lot of people will feel more comfortable in their squat lives upon hearing of this.

Lem said...

Brangelina doesn't feel anything anymore.

Lem said...

What's Brangelina to do

Lem said...

the Brangelina thrill is gone

Beth said...

It might be so, but I'll believe it when they actually announce it. What is the "News of the World"? What kind of attribution is "we can reveal"?

Lem said...

Brangelina came tumbling down.

Titus said...

Went to dindin at Whole Foods tonight with my husband. Yes, it is tough, at times, going out for dindin with a vege. Not as many options as you would imagine.

Than went to a second viewing of A Single Man. Colin Firth tour de force, Julianne Moore, fab.

Tom Ford, what a wonderful transition from designing of clothes to cinema...and welcome.

Overall, very artsy, fab, beautiful, wonderful music, sad and compelling

Althouse, run don't walk to it. It is about a College Professor you know so you may find you have something in common with the Lead Role.

Now I am hungry. I am sorry but Whole Foods Salad Bar does not make it for me but I do feel bad for Americans that do not have the ability to walk to a Whole Foods. Is there anything more depressing?

Tits.

The Crack Emcee said...

Damn, Brad's letting a real catch go with that one. What's wrong with him?

I've got it:

He must be intimidated by women who make a lot of money.

Revenant said...

This is a minor quibble, but: the article says "20 hours in bed together", not "20 hours of sex".

That presumably includes a lot of sleeping, too. :)

Lem said...

What's wrong with him?

Maybe HIS house is not a home ;)

Lem said...

There is a good possibility Brad is gay.. not that there is anything wrong with that.. not at all.

T J Sawyer said...

"...those braids in his goatee. Every time I've seen a guy do that, he's divorced three months later."

Think Jesse Ventura. Same wife since 1975. Time for a political comeback?

Iapetus said...

"She says she sometimes gets mad enough that she tears his shirt."

I thought that was foreplay.

Kensington said...

"Once, it was 20-hour sex sessions..."

And then Brad started including Angelina in them.

Ralph L said...

I don't believe they were legally married. At the grocery store yesterday, Aniston was on several covers, allegedly rubbing it in Jolie's face that she has a nicer body, despite being 40. They've really milked that conflict.

Iapetus said...

@Lem: Teddy Ballgame was a great looking guy when he was young, the Brad Pitt of his era?

AllenS said...

They never had any children. Their family consists of about 6 kids that they went out and bought from poor families that lived in poor countries. The marriage never had a chance. Brad could go back to Jennifer, but the simple fact that she's not spending enough time in the shower is a big turn off. So that probably won't happen. He needs to call Tiger Woods.

ricpic said...

What happens to their exotic trophy children now? Oh the children, the children.

As to Brad: time for this midwestern reg'lar guy to find a reg'lar midwestern gal and quit chasing the "interesting" life.

Angelina will end up like those Grey Gardens ladies.

jag said...

Two thoughts: Angelina made Brad Pitt look old and tired before his time; now I know why. On a serious note, I don't think celebrity couples should be allowed to adopt children b/c what they are really doing is leasing them.

michaele said...

I wonder if growing political differences contributed. Angelina is reputedly not a big fan of Obama and Pitt still sips from the gallon sized Kool-Aid glass.

AJ Lynch said...

Lem said:

"Hey, that lasted a long time in celebrity years!..In Napolitanese 'the marriage worked'."

LOL Lem once I figured out what Napolitanese meant!

wv =pstanc = how AllenS thinks Aniston smells?

AllenS said...

I'm tellin ya, AJ, word verification is the new voodoo mojo.

AllenS said...

I have a question. If you open the comments and then don't post anything, what happens to the word verification word? Where does it go? Will it be recycled?

Moose said...

Those aren't children, by the way. They're pets. Anyone that goes out and buys 6 children is manifesting something like animal horders syndrome.

Angelina is compensating for something deep and twisted. Brad is just... Eye candy.

Right, Titus?

The Gold Digger said...

Their family consists of about 6 kids that they went out and bought from poor families that lived in poor countries.

I'm embarrassed that I know this, but three of their children are their biological children. And yes, they are gorgeous.

AJ Lynch said...

AllenS:

According to Pat Robertson, anything mojo related goes to Haiti to do bad things.


wv = jecarda? = what Jersey Shore bar bouncers ask each other

George said...

Well, perhaps "20 hours of sex" means it took both of them 20 hours to actually do the deed...as in dysfunction junction.

That would certainly better explain the breakup. I mean, just how many years would any quasi-marriage last if it took 20 hours of twoplay to have either party hit high C?

Jenna Culbertson said...

No great tragedy here. Brad is better of besides he can always move into my place for awhile until he gets back on his feet.

vnjagvet said...

I thought jecarda was capitol of teh Once's native country.