October 6, 2009

"Jesus had 12 disciples, so there'd be a hot dog for each of them."

The great hot dog/bun disparity, solved at last.



"W00t, sir, we do agree with that."

"God bless you. And God bless America's wieners."

28 comments:

Quayle said...

And God save the British Sausage.

Michael Hasenstab said...

I've always believed that the metric system is just plain wrong. Jesus had twelve Apostles, therefore there are twelve inches in one foot. It is ordained that we use that system.

If we were intended to use the metric system, there would have been ten Apostles.

I rest my case.

EDH said...

That means a hot dog and bun, even for Judas!

US funds dry up for Iran rights watchdog

Obama White House less confrontational

By Farah Stockman, Globe Staff October 6, 2009

WASHINGTON - For the past five years, researchers in a modest office overlooking the New Haven green have carefully documented cases of assassination and torture of democracy activists in Iran. With more than $3 million in grants from the US State Department, they have pored over thousands of documents and Persian-language press reports and interviewed scores of witnesses and survivors to build dossiers on those they say are Iran’s most infamous human-rights abusers.

But just as the Iran Human Rights Documentation Center was ramping up to investigate abuses of protesters after this summer’s disputed presidential election, the group received word that - for the first time since it was formed - its federal funding request had been denied.

“If there is one time that I expected to get funding, this was it,’’ said Rene Redman, the group’s executive director, who had asked for $2.7 million in funding for the next two years. “I was surprised, because the world was watching human rights violations right there on television."

Many see the sudden, unexplained cutoff of funding as a shift by the Obama administration away from high-profile democracy promotion in Iran, which had become a signature issue for President Bush. But the timing has alarmed some on Capitol Hill.

“The Iran Human Rights Documentation Center is at the forefront of pioneering and vitally important work,’’ said Senator Joe Lieberman, a Connecticut independent, in a statement yesterday. “It is disturbing that the State Department would cut off funding at precisely the moment when these brave investigations are needed most.’’

Michael Rubin, a scholar at the American Enterprise Institute, a conservative Washington-based think tank, said, “It is a shock that they did not get funding.’’ A reason, he asserted, may be that “the Obama administration is so focused on engaging Iran that they don’t want this information to get in the way.’’


wv - "sinyogis" = Hindu spiritual practitioners who steal picnic baskets

Bissage said...

Quayle, that’s blocked for me, right now. But if that’s a link to “Yes Minister,” then your place in heaven is guaranteed.

Hilarious!

Henry said...

Love the "lightweight religion" tag.

MadisonMan said...

Bissage, that's exactly what it is.

Quayle said...

It is, my dear Bissage.

Will you be sending me the reservation and ticket or should I go to the Will Call window?

MadisonMan said...

12 dogs to a pound means each one is only 1.33 oz, vs. 1.6 oz now. That would be unacceptably small.

Make your own buns; then you control the numbers!

Bissage said...

(1) Thanks, MadisonMan!

(2) Quayle, you’ve got me on that one. I may have just written a check my ass can’t cash.

But you can try this: When you arrive at the Pearly Gates, renounce me! It can only help.

Badger said...

My favorite bumper sticker seen hanging in a bar:

24 bottles in a case of beer.
24 hours in a day.
Coincidence? I think not.

john said...

"God bless you. And God bless America's wieners."

A quote from Andy?

AllenS said...

You have 10 hot dogs to a pack, and 8 buns to a pack, so that 2 hot dogs can be converted into Pronto Pups.

Wilber said...

That 'lowest common denominator' didn't bother any of you guys?

I say, we need more wiener teaching in primary school, including notions like the least common multiple.

Wilber said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
tim maguire said...

Nice catch Wilbur. I guess I'm too far removed fomr math class. But shouldn't it be lowest common multiple?

rhhardin said...

XKCD sausage joke that's amusing mostly because of demonstrated willingness to lose most of the audience.

rhhardin said...

That 'lowest common denominator' didn't bother any of you guys?

1/8 + 1/10 = 9/40.

lucid said...

But if there are twelve apostles, and you put 12 hot dogs and buns in each pack, then Jesus wouldn't get one.

Marcia said...

Anyone who thinks the number of hotdogs and buns should match doesn't have little kids.

Little kids don't like hotdog buns.

If you factor in preschool proclivities, a 5:4 ratio of dogs to buns sounds about right, as a national average.

traditionalguy said...

Sometimes large dinner sausages are too hard on the tender white buns. So the more buns the merrier.

dbp said...

Two options:

Continue to sell the hotdogs in 16oz packs, but have them be 2oz each.

Make the buns slightly smaller so that the same weight pack has 10 instead of 8.

ricpic said...

tradguy goes rogue. I like it, I like it.

MadisonMan said...

lucid, Jesus can make his own hot dog out of manna from heaven. Or something like that.

Ignorance is Bliss said...

I say, we need more wiener teaching in primary school, including notions like the least common multiple.

I always had problems with least common multiple, mostly because I was smarter than my teachers. Either that or I was lazy. I never bothered with that whole factoring thing. Obviously, the least common multiple was 0.

lucid said...

@madisonman--

So, maybe this is where the parable of the loaves and fishes comes in, but it's mini-loaves and weiners.

Michael Hasenstab said...

But if there are twelve apostles, and you put 12 hot dogs and buns in each pack, then Jesus wouldn't get one.

Vegetarian. With wheat allergies. Little known fact.

knox said...

Nathan's hot dogs come 8 to a pack. And why would you buy anything else?????

kentuckyliz said...

Hebrew National are 7 to a pack.

(Waiting for C'ford to chime in with derogatory comments about the Joooooooooooos.)

Sunny Buns (best kind) are 12 buns per pack. Too much!

Standard white hot dog buns 8 per pack. 1 leftover bun.

New England top cut buns are 6 per pack. Stuff two dogs in one bun.

Let's call that the Titus dog.