June 24, 2009

Too many bees.

"$1200 obo this has been a good truck for me but i have to sell it because i cant ever get to it with all of the bees around it they have been in and around it for almost 2 months now and i havent been able to get near 5 feet or else i get stung and im sick of it i still have welts from months ago stingings and i cant even get to work because i cant get to my truck so i have to sell it test drives at ur own risk i cant go with you too many bees."

(Via Jac.)

IN THE COMMENTS: This post brought out the best in the commenters. I feel like front-paging the whole thread. I will limit myself to part of what blogging cockroach said...
and that poor truck guy
probably stung too many times
to be able to type at least i have
an excuse but you won t find me
moving into a pickup truck no sir
i m holding out for a b m w
... and add a photoshop request for a picture of a BMW crawling with cockroaches...

... and amba...
Found poetry!
... and add a request for more poetry in the Too Many Bees style.

24 comments:

rhhardin said...

I'd check for a resident queen.

traditionalguy said...

Re-written ad: Ford truck at $1200, less value of honey included at $300 means a net price of $900. Can also be used in Georgia Tech homecoming parades.

EDH said...

Exactly, if you got an experienced keeper to pull the queen, the rest would follow.

Ann Althouse said...

Then an experienced beekeeper should make a best offer to buy the truck, pull the queen, and resell the truck. Pocket huge fee.

traditionalguy said...

Did you say pocket a huge bee?

Eric said...

Apparently salesmanship doesn't come naturally to everyone.

Eli Blake said...

Apparently salesmanship doesn't come naturally to everyone

How about:

The perfect vehicle for people who like to drive buzzed.

The alcoholic would like the pitch, and the members of MADD would agree once they saw the truck.

Methadras said...

Well, now we know where all of the bees have been disappearing to.

blogging cockroach said...

for a minute there i thought it said
too many beers
and i was wondering how that could be
but no it s too many bees
which is easy to understand
any number is too many bees
damned hairy nazis
and that poor truck guy
probably stung too many times
to be able to type at least i have
an excuse but you won t find me
moving into a pickup truck no sir
i m holding out for a b m w

Jason (the commenter) said...

Methadras : Well, now we know where all of the bees have been disappearing to.

It turns out it was greedy beekeepers, making the bees too big.

Tiny bees are happy bees.

bagoh20 said...

I'd say it's no longer his truck. He just needs to accept that and move on.

But apparently it WAS one sweet ride.

EDH said...

traditionalguy said...

Did you say pocket a huge bee?


Or are you just glad to see me?

Duscany said...

This happened to me once. I got my hose and blasted them from 25 feet. When any flew in my direction, I easily shot them down with the water jet. They were all washed up in five minutes. What's the problem?

amba said...

Found poetry!

NKVD said...

My guess is that this advertiser's insect identification skills are similar to his English skills and he doesn't know a bee from a wasp or a hornet. I wouldn't assume that there are actual bees in the truck.

And at the rate bee hives are dying there is probably not much value even if it is a bee hive. Even if it was extracted the hive would probably collapse.

Bottom line is, it's a Ford, so it is worthless anyway.

bearbee said...

.. hairy nazis.

Har, har!

A moment.....

....To bee .... or not to bee:
that... is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The stings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take jet-hose against a bee swarm of troubles,
And by opposing end them?

Jennifer said...

Sell the truck AND the house it was parked at. Maybe move to a different state. Probably what I'd do.

Pogo said...

That's a lot of knees.

bearbee said...

Apparently salesmanship doesn't come naturally to everyone.


Willing to Sacrifice.

Successful Traveling Bee Pollination Franchise

Franchise includes Ford truck with experienced queen bee and colony

National Contacts available

Company Motto: Have truck will pollinate

All bids considered.

Bee there or bee square

Pogo said...

Offering proof, were it needed, that the bee's knees has an asymptotic limit, or may reflect a more simple supply-demand function.


See also: cute as a bug's ear, where peak cuteness is quickly reached, then varies inversely with a further increase in ears.

bearbee said...

Ode to B's

Barely busy bombylious bee buzzed bibacious beer-bellied belchers bared belly button.

Pogo said...

BUZZ

I saw the best Ford of my generation destroyed by bees, running hysterical naked,
dragging themselves through Apidae streets at dawn
looking for an angry sting,
antenna-headed pollinators
burning for the ancient heavenly connection
to the honey-scented dynamo in the machinery of my truck

bearbee said...

Allen Ginsbee?

JAL said...

NKVD -- FORD is The Company which did not take stimulus money.

Why?

They weren't on the edge of dying.

Why?

Ask my 1992 4WD diesel F250 with >298,000 miles on it.

Heh.