March 15, 2009

"Screaming as they ran for their lives, hundreds of hotties in heels toppled over barricades..."

It all started when they said they'd give women under 5'7" a chance.

27 comments:

Jason (the commenter) said...

Hotties? Models? America's Next Top Model has been crap for a long time. The first season was amazing but now it's just a bunch of freaks. Everyone has to "represent" something; no one can just be attractive. And god forbid if anyone acts professionally. They wouldn't get cast because they'd be considered too boring.

Seven Machos said...

That is one of the most bizarre and sad things I have ever read. So much is implied about the lives of those people. I wish there had been a good documentary filmmaker on the scene.

traditionalguy said...

Now we know why women under 5'7" are excluded. The shorter they come, the more feisty they get. "Hottie" must be an adjective used to describe overlooked short people. The best advice for single short people is to become educated and skilled first and sexual display dolls second. Of course the short ones can stand up in root cellars and use up less room wherever they go.

hdhouse said...

natural selection.

traditionalguy said...

Hdhouse...LOL, did the short legged run faster and duck the mob better? Their survival also depended on NYCPD interference, so this is not purely natural. But I put my money on short muscular redheads as the fittest in any riot.

Peter V. Bella said...

Things only got worse when the dolled-up ladies…
strutting strumpets, skinny skanks, creped cankles, bosomed bombshells, painted primpers, primped up posers?

No more women were allowed to audition after the stampede…

Um, is that why they call these events cattle calls?

"I'm 5-foot-3. There's no way I can make it into a model agency," McCarthy said. "They would turn me away at the door. We had an opportunity and it was taken away from us."

I am sure that the new government has a bailout plan for you. I would also bet that the new Attorney General will find a way to sue on your behalf or the Department of Labor will get involved. No one should be discriminated against and denied their right to traipse and sashay across the runway in skimpy clothes because of their height! Woman should be judged on the content of their character, not the absence of their altitutde. This is 2009!!! We are making history and legacies. She will overcome!!!!!

Peter V. Bella said...

Pamplona has the running of the bulls. NYC has the stampede of the skanks.

Bissage said...

That’s pretty much what a food riot looks like except the young mothers aren’t usually so well-dressed.

ricpic said...

Finally! Real curves.

SMGalbraith said...

Man, more silicone in that crowd than is used on the Space Shuttle.

SMGalbraith said...

Red in tooth and claw....

....and toenails and fingernails.

peter hoh said...

Ah, the time-honored tradition of terse alliteration.

EDH said...

What a profound disappointment.

Something is definitely askew when we have to go to the "monkeys are flossing" post for "breasts" and, well, the Next Top Model post for this,

Scores of aspiring models slept overnight outside the Park Central Hotel...Tensions quickly boiled over.

"I had to pee in a cup and change my clothes in the street," said Mona Knight, 18, of the Bronx, who slept on the street.


"Hotties"? Sounds more like Ho's.

Peter V. Bella said...

"Hotties"? Sounds more like Ho's.

Sleeping on the street and peeing in cups? Homeless Hos?

David said...

(Randy Newman)

Short People got no reason
Short People got no reason
Short People got no reason
To live

They got little hands
Little eyes
They walk around
Tellin' great big lies
They got little noses
And tiny little teeth
They wear platform shoes
On their nasty little feet

Big Mike said...

Careful, David, Professor Althouse is only 5'5" herself.

Professor, please tell us you weren't one of the "hotties in heels" caught up in the stampede!

PatCA said...

Bad crowd control can prove fatal, like the recent fatality at WalMart. But I guess it's funny if "hotties" are involved.

Ann Althouse said...

5'5" is average height for a woman. I don't consider myself short, but you're supposed to be tall to be a model. If you aren't tall, find another line of work. Deal with it.

Jason (the commenter) said...

If you aren't tall, find another line of work. Deal with it.

But this is the world of Tyra Banks and you never have to give up your fantasies in Tyra's world. Everyone can be a model. No matter how ludicrous it may seem to a rational person, as long as you play to the prejudices of a target audience.

You can expect special behavior, never having to work again, and being the envy of everyone you know, because there are no consequences. Cause and effect dissipate. Dreams become reality. Years and years of ignoring the world and being selfish pay off big time.

You are like God when you win and no one can ever take that away.

That's what all these women believe. Deal with that.

Trooper York said...

My cousin the elf went with her friend to try out. She knew she was way too short but she went with her friend who definitely has a chance because she is tall, thin and insane.

William said...

Any chance of steel cage death matches for model wannabes? That would attract my viewership.

Zachary Paul Sire said...

Video of the riot

SMGalbraith said...

More video from a different angle: Link.

David said...

5'5" is not short. My grandfather was 5'3." He did not think he was short. I am 5'10" (or was, before the shrinkage began.) I have three stepdaughters each 6'0' in their bare feet. So I can deal with short. (One of the steps is a model in NY. At a wedding recently, one of the groomsmen said "I can't stand to look at her. She's too beautiful." But in her peep group she's probably just high average. She gets work because she has a agreeable personality and is easy to work with. Something overlooked by some of the women in that line.)

traditionalguy said...

Query: should a man marry/date a woman taller than him? I have never tried it. Equal height is OK, but my feeling is that a woman wants a man big enough to match her height or be taller. Of course most of my lifetime of experiences is not relevant to today's youth culture. IMO every height of woman I know is beautiful in her own proportions. And once the conversation begins everyone will surprise you. Grace and courage and intelligence is a beauty all its own that no body type can ruin or make up for its lack.

Alex said...

traditionalguy said...
Query: should a man marry/date a woman taller than him? I have never tried it. Equal height is OK, but my feeling is that a woman wants a man big enough to match her height or be taller. Of course most of my lifetime of experiences is not relevant to today's youth culture. IMO every height of woman I know is beautiful in her own proportions. And once the conversation begins everyone will surprise you. Grace and courage and intelligence is a beauty all its own that no body type can ruin or make up for its lack.

4:40 PM


Reading that brought a tear to my eye.

theobromophile said...

Query: should a man marry/date a woman taller than him? I have never tried it. Equal height is OK, but my feeling is that a woman wants a man big enough to match her height or be taller.

If they don't have a problem, I don't have a problem: if he's shorter, then we'll just have to even it all out by snuggling on the couch.

Then again, the first part of that isn't a given. If I ever decide that my dating life is worth turning into a Bridget-Jones style memoir, "dumped for being too tall" is definitely making it in there.