Underwear supermodel Karolina Kurkova has no belly button.
I read it at BBC.com, where I went to look for some serious news to enlighten you. You may think I post the lowest drivel, but I actively bypassed this story last night. I started a draft, titled "They called him the 'Screamer.' He was very noisy," but then, I though, no, I'm not going there.
Yet, here is a much nicer place, the blank mid-torso of a skinny pretty woman who's done nothing more evil than prancing about in a bra and underpants. It's an interesting mystery. It's not like we know Kurkova left her navel on some battlefield in Europe (or Albert Hall).
Bonus religious question: Did Adam and Eve have navels?
Yet, here is a much nicer place, the blank mid-torso of a skinny pretty woman who's done nothing more evil than prancing about in a bra and underpants. It's an interesting mystery. It's not like we know Kurkova left her navel on some battlefield in Europe (or Albert Hall).
Some have no belly button as a result of the surgery needed to correct abdominal problems at birth, often either an umbilical hernia, or a condition known as gastroschisis - born with the stomach and intestines poking through a hole in the abdominal wall.I know all about that, having watched the "Hottest Chick, Ugliest Scar" episode of the Howard Stern Show. (It's "Megan" at the link, which has photos of women in bikinis.)
Bonus religious question: Did Adam and Eve have navels?
Labels: Adam and Eve, belly button, bikini, body parts, bras, hitler, medicine, models, scars, testicles, underpants
posted by Ann Althouse at 12:09 PM
59 Comments:
Without a belly button the champagne must slosh all over.
Did Adam and Eve have navels?
I say no, since they didn't exist.
Assuming they did, then yes, since they were created in God's image.
BTW, the bonus religious question link is bad, at least on my end.
Fixed.
By the way, Adam and Eve had no babyhood, no childhood, no rearing from trusted adults, no mother or father to love them and show them how to act. They were essentially babies in adult form when they were tested and punished. It's so unfair! What a terrible story to cling to!
Cling... hmmm....
They were essentially babies in adult form when they were tested and punished. It's so unfair! What a terrible story to cling to!
Not necessarily. I think CS Lewis gives a good portrayal of adult innocence and ignorance in his Perelandra.
Plus, following the story, A and E had jobs, such as naming animals (akin in earlier cultures to understanding their being), and gardening. They also had a sense of right and wrong, as the temptation was a temptation because of their moral sense. They knew what it meant to choose selfish desire over peaceful community.
They had rearing, from God himself, who apparently hung out with them in the cool of the evening, showing them how to act, and bringing them to complete maturity.
Ungrateful brats. They gave all that up for a bit of premature delights and made us all have to learn good and evil the hard way. Then we all make the same kinds of stupid decisions that break apart peace and community all so we can assert our own grand being upon a world that really doesn't care about us anymore.
Tease us with the lead of "Underwear supermodel"? And that is the best picture you can share with us?
Did Adam fail the test?
Genesis 1:26-27 And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth. So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.
Does God have a belly button?
Joe--If A and E were created in God's image, are you suggesting God had a belly button? That has some MAJOR theological implications, I think.
Cling, huh?
Out here we are definitely clinging to our guns, although the guns shops are running low on inventory.
Best investment strategy, canned food and extra ammo. Plus a Bible of course.
Please post a better supermodel picture, my pacemaker needs wound up.
And what Bissage said. Reminds me of a story..........
"Does God have a belly button?"
According to orthodox Christian theology, absolutely he does.
Scars too.
Did Adam fail the test?
Yep. Then blamed the woman for not living up to his own responsibilities.
Typical man. Blame the woman for his own weakness.
Got him a bunch of hard work, though, and detention.
A friend of ours, old enough to be our dad, doesn't have a belly button, lost to surgery. When we were at the lake, and the kids noticed he was missing a belly button, we told them that he was Adam.
It's so unfair!
I think God's concept of fair differs from humans'. That might explain why the world isn't the way we would like it to be.
Alright. That settles that. But what I want to know is: If God created Adam in His image and God gave Adam nipples, wouldn't that mean God has nipples? Why in the world would God need nipples? Adam didn't even need nipples. I'm beginning to wonder if the entire project was somehow mismanaged.
So I guess Botticelli got it wrong with Venus, born of the sea?
After this thread is closed. all participants will be eligible for a Master of Divinity degree
I read it at BBC.com, where I went to look for some serious news to enlighten you.
The Beeb? News? *snort* *titter* *chuckle*
*BUHWHAHAHAHAHAHA!*
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Ya Baby!
It looks Photoshopped. She clearly has a naval here.
It has long been a matter of dispute among presidential historians as to who had the biggest belly button. The natural choice would of course have been William Howard Taft who because of his immense girth would have the largest of all presidential stomachs and thus the biggest belly button. It was in fact immense and his children would often climb inside it like a kangaroo baby when he was in the bath. The future senator Robert Taft often spoke of those days when he would take a bath with his father and look out the rest of the world. He felt safe and protected in way that he could never feel for the rest of his life. In fact many historians feel that feeling of anxiety led to Senator Taft embracing the America First movement and isolationism which led to America ignoring the rise of the Nazi’s in Europe. In fact some go so far as to say that the rise of Hitler was really due to President William Howard Taft’s belly button.
(The Long and the Short of It, Presidential Penises by Doris Kearns Goodwin, St. Martins Press).
Doris is gonna sue you Trooper.
Triangle Man: is your tongue in cheek? You expect us to believe a Victoria's Secret page isn't photoshopped? :-) Seriously, my understanding is that they add bellybuttons to a lot of her pictures.
As the most athletic of all America Presidents, Theodore Roosevelt had the most muscular belly button of all the Presidents of the United States. A sickly and asthmatic child, the young Theodore Roosevelt was a fanatical devotee of exercise to the point that he devoted part of his workout to strengthening the muscles of his belly button. He had an “outie” in which he did curls with a pencil fitted with two tiny weights. His belly button was in fact so strong that he once tied off his lariat on his erect belly button while roping a calf in a rodeo when his saddle horn broke in mid contest. It was quite an impressive feat.
(The Long and the Short of It, Presidential Penises by Doris Kearns Goodwin, St. Martins Press)
Hang on, let's see about this.
"God, do you have a belly button?"
Ooooouuuuuummmmm.
God says, "None of your business, but no. Neither did Adam nor Eve whilst on Earth. Think about it now, why would they? Why would I? We were not born of woman and your navel is the remnant scar of your maternal connection. According to your legend, an amalgam of several preexisting legends, Cain would be the first born with a navel, but all these legends of yours are patently false, a condensation of the factual truth which is more complicated than that, created in the days of oral history when uncomfortable and difficult to accept complicating facts interfered with stories told around the campfires of that age. Carry on."
"Thanks, God."
Well, there you have it.
One of the most intriguing rumors about the presidential belly button is that President John Fitzgerald Kennedy had an outie that would become erect when he became sexually aroused. True to his Irish heritage, the erect outie was in fact longer and thicker than his penis as he suffered from the curse of the Irish. Angie Dickerson who was one of JFK’s most famous conquests once said that making love to the president was “The most exciting twenty seconds of my life.” But it is the rest of the quote that gives it context when she said “When he was done I climbed on his stomach and he stuck his belly button in me and it was heaven. He was one freaky limp dick mick.”
(The Long and the Short of It, Presidential Penises by Doris Kearns Goodwin, St. Martins Press)
And not only that-- the Dow fell 427 yesterday and 444 today to 7,552, down 43 percent for the year!
We females are born with all our eggs. I choose to believe we are all Eve because of this. Life everlasting. A part of me has existed for over a million years (or 6009 years if you prefer.) Take that, Oregon Fungus!.
The strangest story about presidential belly buttons was that of President James Buchanan. One of the shortest of our chief executives it was discovered at his death that every opening or orifice on his body had been stretched or opened to an unusual degree. His nostrils, ear holes and belly button were stretched and almost disfigured and distended. While no known medical condition could have caused this strange disfigurement it was given the medical name of titusitis for reasons that are unexplained to this very day.
(The Long and the Short of It, Presidential Penises by Doris Kearns Goodwin, St. Martins Press)
No parents? You say that like it is a bad thing!
My shrink friends and I sit around and hope that we were good enough parents that our kids go on Oprah to diss us rather than one of the lesser and more sensational shows.
I mean, all parents give their children issues! So Adam and Eve had it lucky, but they blew it!
Trey
My wife had a tummy tuck some years ago, and the plastic surgeon had to create a 'fake' belly button for her, since the surgery itself removed her original one.
I told her that if I were ever to have a tummy tuck, I would insist that I be left without a belly button at all, just to freak people out. ..bruce..
I don't know why you bypassed Hitler's testicle story.
My favorite spin on that one is that, while on a tour of Germany, Bette Midler had the German audience singing along to the British satirical tune "Hitler had only one big ball; Goerring had two but they were small. Himmler had something similar, but Goebbels had no balls at all."
The Beat poet Gregory Corso also did not have a belly button.
He was found on the steps of the Catholic church of Brooklyn at age 6 months, and never knew his mother until he was about 70 when she was finally tracked down (she was 87).
Corso thought that perhaps he was a child of angels, or perhaps some kind of Greek god, and used the non-existent belly button as evidence to that effect.
mcg, Yes, tongue in cheek. Is there an emoticon for this?
There is a species of mite that is born pregnant.
http://www.trivia-library.com/a/the-insect-that-is-born-pregnant.htm
I'd hate to imagine any correlation to humans on this.
By the way, Adam and Eve had no babyhood, no childhood, no rearing from trusted adults, no mother or father to love them and show them how to act.
Althouse subliminal support for gay marriage?
Not bad. but i need more than the other "position" sucks ;)
Originally, Adam had a good life. Nice garden, lots of domestic animals to eat. Then, he fell asleep and God took one of his ribs and made a woman! Gads! Then God invented the belly button because it was a lot easier on the men. When women leave a man after a long relationship, sometimes a belly button is the only thing a man has left.
There's something about Drudge that makes us want to look at it all the time.
It’s something about you, it’s called stupidity.
When women leave a man after a long relationship, sometimes a belly button is the only thing a man has left.
Not if you've married in a half & half state ;)
"half & half state"
North and South Dakota, North and South Carolina?
half & half state
Michael Jackson and his family
The Catholic Church teaches that the creation story is not literal. I'm not sure many people know that, or even many Catholics for that matter.
Catechism of the Catholic Church
362 The human person, created in the image of God, is a being at once corporeal and spiritual. the biblical account expresses this reality in symbolic language when it affirms that "then the LORD God formed man of dust from the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living being."229 Man, whole and entire, is therefore willed by God.
What did God do to make man, well, man? He breathed a soul into him (and her).
364 The human body shares in the dignity of "the image of God": it is a human body precisely because it is animated by a spiritual soul, and it is the whole human person that is intended to become, in the body of Christ, a temple of the Spirit:232
The soul is what makes man unique. It is the soul that is in the image of God, not our body.
366 The Church teaches that every spiritual soul is created immediately by God - it is not "produced" by the parents...
370 In no way is God in man's image. He is neither man nor woman. God is pure spirit in which there is no place for the difference between the sexes. But the respective "perfections" of man and woman reflect something of the infinite perfection of God: those of a mother and those of a father and husband.
What Catholicism teaches in that the creation story in Genesis is allegory. Yes God created everything, but when God acted to creat man in His image what he did was imbue him with a spiritual image of God, a soul.
I know, Catholicism doesn't represent the beliefs of all Christians. Jerry Falwell might have thought the creation story was literal, or not, I dunno. But Catholicism is the oldest and largest Christian denomination.
Normally I wouldn't say much about this but I just went through a class on the subject.
So yes they had belly buttons and no God does not. ;)
How can God be perfect and have no belly button? Or, is Karolina God?
Oh, and Trooper, would you post the sections on Nixon and Clinton? I can't seem to download those from Doris's thing.
Christian theology states that we were created in the image of God. That would mean a) God looks like us and b) there is a Mrs. God.
Of course, most Christians don't take their theology seriously let alone examine the logical implications of that theology. (In this one point, Mormons do take the next logical step and believe there are heavenly parents and that they got there by going through the same testing process as we are now.)
I believe that the Eastern Orthodox churches would claim to be older than Catholicism.
One of the most interesting tales about presidential belly buttons revolves around the strange case of Richard Milhous Nixon. President Nixon was born in Yorba Linda California to Francis and Hannah Nixon. His mother was a devout Quaker who none the less had many strange quirks. She eschewed the services of physicians and preferred to have a midwife help her deliver her son. The most popular and competent midwife was an Italian immigrant named Natalie Della Sinatra who soothed and mothered the young Quaker as she prepared for motherhood. It was a dark and stormy night on January 9, 1913 that Hannah Nixon went into labor. Everything seemed to be going smoothly until it was determined that it was a breech birth with the future president’s feet preceding him into the world. His little feet were motley and discolored looking almost like little cordovan wing tips. Now in that day and age it was very dangerous as the child had to be born before it was deprived of too much oxygen. The midwife coaxed and pleaded with the mother but finally had to pull the child out by main strength. The reason for the delay was readily apparent as Mrs. Sinatra began to scream and wail. She shouted “Coda de Diavolo…Coda de Diavolo…Jesus Christo.” Francis Nixon burst into the birthing chamber drawn by the shrieks emanating from the distraught midwife. When he looked at his new born son he was shaken, for instead of an umbical cord there was a forked tail. The Coda de Diavolo…The tail of the Devil. Young Mr. Nixon was a man of action. He slapped the midwife to stop her hysteria. He slapped his wife to stop her wailing. And he slapped his new son for being born with a tail. Mrs. Sinatra recovered her wits and quickly cut off the devils tale with pruning scissors and tied off the umbilical cord. But she was so shaken that she moved across the country to Hoboken New Jersey to never be heard of again. Francis Nixon could never show love to his son after that night, with unfortunate consequences for his character. But that baby grew up to be the President of the United States. That is of course a different tale of the devil.
(The Long and the Short of It, Presidential Penises by Doris Kearns Goodwin, St. Martins Press)
I believe that the Eastern Orthodox churches would claim to be older than Catholicism.
Yes, and they use an older liturgy to prove it. It's really a silly point. There was only one church for the first thousand years. So the Orthodox and the Catholics are equally old. Problem is the Catholics are used to arguing with Protestants, and don't really know what to do with the Orthodox, what with their bishops-from-churches older-than-Rome and all.
most Christians don't take their theology seriously let alone examine the logical implications of that theology.
That's true. But those who do take it seriously know that this is a kind of silly and naive explanation of 'image' that was pretty much addressed like 1800 years ago. There's no Mrs. God, cuz Women are God's image too. And he doesn't look like us (the Father at least) because physical attributes is not the meaning of 'image'. They didn't write in our English after all. All kinds of very, very established meanings behind these words besides the literal meaning of our particular translation.
True, Doris Kearns Goodwin has devoted her career to the study of the Executive Branch, but isn’t it a bit suspicious that she has suddenly become so knowledgeable about a different hole area? Urology and umbilicology are pudendal opposites. The Goodwin text has uncanny similarities to passages from the “Influence of Navel Power Upon History”, a tome that has been in Vogue since it was issued. The Taft and Buchanan parts seem lifted, and her Nixon is not to be trusted.
The most bizarre tale of presidential belly buttons was that of William Jefferson Clinton. President Clinton had a severe problem with his belly button. It seems that when he was born he was actually had a twin who was conjoined with him in a complicated jumble of internal organs. The doctors knew that his twin brother Jesse could not survive so they decided to save the young Billy Blythe. Unfortunately medical science was somewhat primitive in Hope, Arkansas and a terrible error was made. They had removed most of Jesse from young Billy’s body but neglected to remove his testicles which were lodged in his lower abdomen right under his belly button which of course was an outie. This was not a problem until puberty when the buildup of Spermatozoon gave him tremendous stomach aches. The doctors were baffled and knew they could not remove the extra testicles as it could kill the young aspiring politician. So the rerouted the sperm ducts to his belly button so that he could find release. Unfortunately in the throws of passion he would often forget that he was spewing his vital juices from his belly button as well as his penis and he ended up staining many a carpet, couch, back seat and little blue dresses. Thus it can be said that President Clinton’s belly button eventually led to his impeachment.
(The Long and the Short of It, Presidential Penises by Doris Kearns Goodwin, St. Martins Press)
I heard Doris Kearns Goodwin give a lecture at an important lecture series a couple years ago. Very weird. She speaks without paragraphs. I didn't know paragraphs were part of speaking until I heard her speak, and leave them entirely out. Her points just flow one into the other, with nary a break or pause. She's a good speaker, mind you, except for that lack of paragraph thing.
The trees had no rings and the rocks had no strata. The kids had incestuous relationships.
I didn't know paragraphs were part of speaking until I heard her speak, and leave them entirely out.
Our early writing doesn't have paragraphs. The fact that, once we start setting things in type, we develop them, makes me think that they're part of our speech pattern, along with other punctuation and mechanics of writing, and that we developed them to organize our pages the way we organize our thoughts, and spoken words.
Christian theology states that we were created in the image of God. That would mean a) God looks like us and b) there is a Mrs. God.
You're kidding, right? Neither of those two conclusions follow from the premise. I mean, if you're gonna mock someone for believing a religion, a proper use of basic logic might bolster your case.
(Continuing...) Your primary source of error is that you're interpreting "image" exactly backwards. God doesn't "look" like us, we "look" like him. (In fact, even the use of the word "look" is questionable; the term "image" need not refer solely to a three-dimensional visual image. But I'm focusing on your primary error.)
The directionality is important because as finite beings we would necessarily be an incomplete image of God. Thus the fact that we were created male and female in no way implies a Mrs. God; rather it implies that God has both male and female characteristics, and each of us reflects only a portion of them.
My grandniece was born with an omphalocele (which is similar to gastroschisis, except the organs protrude through the umbilical cord and are enclosed in a sac) and after five surgeries, she has no navel. She is now 2, and will have plastic surgery when she is older to minimize the terrible scars, and create a cosmetic navel.
Troop, you're way good.
Howzerdo - a question for you!
A friend also had an omphalocele when she was born. She has not had any plastic surgery and is very conscious of the scar. I was wondering if you could share any information regarding doctors/hospitals who would perform such a procedure. Thanks!
Dee
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