May 12, 2008

The spaniel-ears effect.

DSC08733

This is one of the things I might have been looking at here.

Man, is that dog — a rare clumber? — depressed or what?

47 comments:

Roger J. said...

Perhaps this is indeed one of the rare clumbers--if so, is Titus on the end of that (fabulous) leash?

vet66 said...

That pooch should be writing a book titled "The Audacity To Hope!"

al said...

Wow - that could be my dog.

I doubt she's depressed. Bored maybe but not depressed. She'd probably rather be laying on the floor at home or following her person from room to room rather than be on a leash.

rhhardin said...

That's protest, not depression.

A choke collar and striding off briskly saying ``heel'' once fixes it.

Holding position is an interesting challenge.

MadisonMan said...

That dog is saying You are sadly mistaken if you think I'm gonna follow you when I can be smelling this nice patch of pavement!

It looks like an English Cocker -- they don't have the squished snout that American Cockers do -- but the legs are too long.

Ann Althouse said...

The dog is tied to a bicycle rack while the owner steps into a café for a few minutes.

Trooper York said...

He is just looking for a place to
urinate.

vbspurs said...

Why does clumber remind me of clanger?

As in Bedford clanger or those tasty Belfast sausages.

Yet strangely it's an apposite name for dog poop, don't you find.

A clumber who just made a clanger. Clanger-Scooper?

Cheers,
Victoria

Grunt said...

There is no way that dog is a Clumber. My good friends have a Clumber, a drooly, stupid dog (although, as it turns out, a brian trust when paired with their Bassett) but Clumbers tails are docked much shorter and they are white, not golden. Also, all red around the eyes and with longer fur.

bearbee said...

She's a little cutie.

Depressed because she's rare?

Typical demeanor ?

Clanger-Scooper?

Or the highly specialized Clumber-Clanger-Scooper.

Trooper York said...

I don't think it is a rare clumber. It looks dazed and confused. More like a Farcockteh
Spaniel.

Roger J. said...

We are all clearly in desparate need of Titus's expertise.

Zeb Quinn said...

When you google "rare clumber" to find out what they look like you'll find Althouse posts the first and second items returned.

Ann Althouse said...

I'd expect it to be the first through fiftieth.

MadisonMan said...

The images of Clumber Spaniels on the google make me think this is a Cocker/Springer mix -- all cocker except for the long leg. If the owner said it was a Rare Clumber, well they lied.

Clumbers seem to have a more hangdog expression than this one.

Pogo said...

So does the "the spaniel-ears effect" mean that breasts have blondish wavy fur when you smoke?

former law student said...

Way too small to be a clumber, but cockers -- even English cockers -- have far more belly and leg hair. Maybe a springer spaniel? Or a cocker that's been trimmed.

Palladian said...

No, clumbers are fatter and uglier.

Roger J. said...

OK Palladian--technical foul on you for Titus-baiting ;-)

Hoosier Daddy said...

Thank God for good tail positioning. I'm not one for getting brown eyed by a cocker spaniel in the afternoon.

MadisonMan said...

Or a cocker that's been trimmed.

Well of course it's been trimmed! That's what you do to a cocker after a long winter.

Trooper York said...

"Or a cocker that's been trimmed."

Now we know for sure that it's not a rare clumber because they get a Brazilian wax.

Hoosier Daddy said...

Some guy who lives about 4 doors down from me has a beagle or basset hound I think and I hate that animal. He lets him outside and all the frigging animal does is howl. The first time I heard it I honestly thought it was the tornado siren going off. It was funny at first but now it simply pisses me off because the idiot who owns it just lets it sit out there and bray for an hour. I imagine it’s what Titus sounds like when he’s getting bent over his (fabulous) futon.

The house next to him is for sale and I saw a Vietnamese family looking at it so maybe there’s hope.

Trooper York said...

Holy Cow, Andrew Sullivan lives next door to Hooiser Daddy! Cool.

That's wrong in so many ways.

Palladian said...

See?

vbspurs said...

You people know more about trimmed cockers than a yeshiva.

Cheers,
Victoria

Ron said...

Victoria! Schtick of the day!

Yensing Gonif Ron

Hoosier Daddy said...

Holy Cow, Andrew Sullivan lives next door to Hooiser Daddy! Cool.


I'd rather it be Hitchens, that way I can always get a drink when I run out of Scotch. My neighbors are beer drinkers and enjoy foo foo drinks with flavored vodka which I think should be banned.

Not vodka of course but the flavored crap.

Hoosier Daddy said...

You people know more about trimmed cockers than a yeshiva.

Or Titus. I think he's the resident cockossuer.

Ron said...

Or Titus. I think he's the resident cockossuer.

It's when they start talking about the terroir of smegma that I get worried...

ricpic said...

The shabbas goy often has the look of a farcockteh spaniel.

Trooper York said...

But the faygala meeskait likes to shtup the farcockteh spaniel in the tuches. That why he looks so fertummelt.

Ann Althouse said...

Why does Titus have such ugly dogs? It doesn't seem right.

Pogo said...

Yipe!

Palladian's picture of the rare clumber looks like Whittaker Chambers reincarnated.

Well, there were those rumors.

Pogo said...

Whittaker Chambers

Ralph said...

The poor dog still misses the rest of his tail.
what Titus sounds like when he’s getting bent over his (fabulous) futon.
Titus insists he's a butt-slammer, not a slammee.
A house on the other side of my block has a dog that barks for hours. Don't know why no one's killed it yet.

ricpic said...

A cocker and a clumber and a hog one day
Went out into a field to play.
Said the hog, "I've got the lumber,"
Said the cocker, "I can clock her,"
So they both climbed on the clumber
And they had their way --
Which explains why clumbers have the look of old ofays.

titusisdreamingofhog said...

That is not a rare clumber spaniel.

It looks like a cocker spaniel mixed with a lab or something.

It is too dark. Clumbers are whiter, heavier, and more beautiful.

Sorry, try again.

titusisdreamingofhog said...

Also rare clumbers eyes are much droopier and bloodshot. Like they had a crazy night on the town.

john said...

Titus,

It's really true then that dogs and their masters begin to look alike.

vbspurs said...

Pogo, I'll see your Whittaker Chambers, and raise you .

Perez Hilton

titusisdreamingofhog said...

Rare clumbers tend to be all white with some lemon spots-which mine have.

The picture Pallandian showed is not a particularly beautiful rare clumber. Mine, on the other hand are.

Large jowels (sp).

They drool quite a bit.

Also, much more hair.

They are much more distinctive and unusual and rare than this dog.

They also have the famous "clumber roll" which is the way they walk. It is a fabulous walk-you need to see it to believe it.

OK, enough of the physical descriptions of the rare clumbers and I am going to go spoon them right now.


Also, I don't own a futon and I don't bend over for anyone.

I am a top-how many times do I have to mention that to my fellow republicans? Nothing goes into my ass only fabulous pinched loafs go out which I try to describe here for everyone's enjoyment.

titusisdreamingofhog said...

Not to dwell on this but rare clumbers legs are much shorter also.

Palladian said...

Face it, titface. Clumbers, rare or otherwise, are hideous dogs. You can delude yourself as much as you like.

Your taste in dogs probably aligns with your poor taste in clothes, interior design, mates and well, your poor taste in general.

Hoosier Daddy said...

Also, I don't own a futon and I don't bend over for anyone.

Oh come now Titus (not literally please), I'm sure in your younger years, the exploratory years, you played the part of the sausage casing for some hot guy.

You can tell us the truth. We're here for you and will still respect you.

Ann Althouse said...

Could someone write a 2-character play about Titus and Palladian? I'm picturing one of those bare-stage things with a lot of dialogue.

tituseverythingscomingup roses said...

How mean Palladian. And I have been so nice to you.

You sound bitter. Someone needs to give you a big hug with special kisses.

Yes, when I was young I tried to get fucked but I couldn't do it. It hurt too much. My pucker was too tight.

My uterine lining would not absorb the hog and as a result it pushed it out. My vas deferans were out of place. I felt like I was going to take a shit and have no control and I hated that. My labia hurt afterwards.

I tried to breath and relax and all that shit but just couldn't do it.

Come to think of it Palladian generally dislikes all gays....hmmmm-I sense some gay self-loathing going on there.