"Project Runway." We're reminded that there is no immunity from last week's show, and I'm reminding you that I predicted, based on the excessive Michael-love in last week's edit, that Michael, last week's winner, would be auf'd soon.
No open-toed footwear. That's what Tim says. The designers are driven out to New Jersey, and the scenery flows by like the opening sequence of "The Sopranos." And it's trash! Make an outfit out of trash.
"This is kinda fun for me, cuz I grew up white trash, and my sister and I used to always go dumpster diving. I spent my whole life in the trash can." Says Kayne, quite adorably.
"I let things evolve. I don't own the future. I don't go there. You know what I mean? I just let it come. Let it come. And that's how I work." Says Vincent, and the accompanying plunking bass notes say: he's in trouble. We see him grimacing, and Laura's saying "He's not mentally stable."
Then we see Kayne and Robert talking about how Laura's nuts. And Laura's making a dress that says -- across the ass -- "for nuts only."
Meanwhile, Kayne is making something inexplicable, with stiff, white paper painted with atrocious green flowers. They're all gonna laugh at you.
Michael has made a really cool gold bustier. But that skirt! It seems like a blank canvas.
Ooh, Alison and Tim are talking about how her model is a little large. She's larger than all the other models... Oh, poor Alison! She needs to win so she can auf her model! Have I ever mentioned how much I love Alison. Look at that subtle color, those pleats. And I'm trying not to be swayed by her ultra-sweet appearance. She looks like a woman on an album cover from the 50s that my father would have loved.
And Michael wins again! Cool! Jeffrey comes in second and -- like an idiot -- he expresses his jealousy: Michael won for a "diabetic" outfit. No flavor.
Kayne is spared, and it's between Vincent and Alison. Oh, no, don't take my Alison away!
"There's a fine line between innovation and insanity," Heidi says to Vincent. But Alison, how could you be so careless with the female form. And Alison is out! Oh, no!
Laura freaks about the bad model Alison got stuck with. Shhhh... shhh, Kayne says. Let us enjoy our last moments with Alison.