"Buying a cemetery plot where I can have a green burial, on the other hand, proved to be surprisingly affordable and will allow my body, once no longer in use..."

"... to decompose as quickly and as naturally as possible, with minimal environmental damage. Bonus: If my descendants ever care to visit, my grave will be in a beloved place, where my daughter has come nearly every summer of her life. 'Do you see a lot of interest in green burials?' I asked the friendly town cemetery commissioner who was showing me around. 'I don’t think we’ve had a traditional burial in two years,' he said. 'It’s all green.'"

From "When I Go, I’m Going Green More Americans are choosing burials in which everything is biodegradable" (NYT).

"She is desperate for the book to not be a downer, to be a jolt instead. 'The pity fucking kills me,' she said. 'It kills my strength.'"

"She wanted the perception to be 'the opposite: She’s alive. She’s enjoying her life. This is great.' She went on: 'The book is highly comedic. And then it slides down into horrible tragedy and then comes back up to the punch line.' I’d finished the whole thing, but I had to ask what the punch line was. There were a handful, she said. But the most important one was that you’re never too old to get even."

From "E. Jean Carroll’s Uneasy Peace/In the year and a half since defeating Trump for the second time, she’s written a secret book — and learned to shoot" (NY Magazine).

At the end of this long article, there's some discussion of the security around her home. Asked if she worried about the danger of turning off her security lights so that the frogs that once mated in her swimming pool would sing again, as they had in the past:

"Can you do me a favor? Can you stop scattering your dearly departed’s ashes all over my favorite golf course?"

"I want to play Pebble Beach, not your grandpa. For that matter, stop dumping your meemaw’s sandy 'cremains' on Disneyland rides. Last year, somebody on Star Wars: Rise of the Resistance pulled the stunt, forcing the ride’s shutdown for cleaning. What are parents in the next car supposed to tell the kids when a cloud of human ash hits them in the face? Luke, that is not your father...."

From "Please. Stop. Spreading. Human. Ash. In. Public. With a huge rise in cremation rates, a sentimental ritual is turning into a gritty scourge" (WaPo)(free-access link, because it's full of amusing/horrible details).

Can we also stop saying "cremains"? I see the author put the term in scare quotes and the word "ash" is in the headline. I object to "cremains." The word, according to the OED, only dates back to 1950, and it seems to have been concocted like the name of a snack food. For example, Funyuns = fun + onions. Wouldn't it be more respectful to say "ashes"? Or do we think that "ashes" suggests the soft silky material left after a wood fire and thus has a whiff of false advertising?

Arlington Cemetery — "It is not a place for politics.... And I will never politicize them."

I've avoided discussing the topic, because I can see that to talk about it is to violate the principle that the military dead should not be politicized. And yet to follow that principle is to cramp political debate about war, and political debate about war should be central to every presidential campaign. And the assertion that this is no place for politics is itself political debate.

But the main reason I'm going to start talking about this issue is because the Kamala Harris X account put up this long tweet yesterday. I've boldfaced the quotes I used for the post title:

As Vice President, I have had the privilege of visiting Arlington National Cemetery several times. It is a solemn place; a place where we come together to honor American heroes who have made the ultimate sacrifice in service of this nation. It is not a place for politics. And yet, as was reported this week, Donald Trump’s team chose to film a video there, resulting in an altercation with cemetery staff. Let me be clear: the former president disrespected sacred ground, all for the sake of a political stunt. This is nothing new from Donald Trump. This is a man who has called our fallen service members “suckers” and “losers” and disparaged Medal of Honor recipients. A man who, during a previous visit to the cemetery, reportedly said of fallen service members, “I don’t get it. What was in it for them?” This is a man who is unable to comprehend anything other than service to himself. If there is one thing on which we as Americans can all agree, it is that our veterans, military families, and service members should be honored, never disparaged, and treated with nothing less than our highest respect and gratitude. And it is my belief that someone who cannot meet this simple, sacred duty should never again stand behind the seal of the President of the United States of America. I will always honor the service and sacrifice of all of America’s fallen heroes, who made the ultimate sacrifice on behalf of our beloved nation and our cherished freedoms. I mourn them and salute them. And I will never politicize them.

Those cannot be words straight from the mind of Kamala Harris. They sound like words written for Joe Biden to read off a teleprompter, replete with his oft-repeated claim that Trump said  “suckers” and “losers” and “I don’t get it. What was in it for them?” It's entirely political, including, of course, the assertion that it is not political.

Trump's visit to the cemetery was also political. It was a first move in a political game that Harris ought to have chosen not to play. But she couldn't get all her supporters to refrain from playing, and in the end, she jumped in. She made the obvious move, and it is an awful blunder. You knew it was a blunder — didn't you? (I hope you are at least that savvy) — but you just had to do it. 

If only you'd had the sense and the restraint to delete most of the words. Let me help retrospectively and uselessly:

George Orwell said, "There are some ideas so absurd that only an intellectual could believe them."

I'm thinking about that today, watching this:

MSNBC host: JD Vance wishing to join his family plot (6 generations) in Kentucky is WHITE MALE SUPREMACY pic.twitter.com/zYfYtdSqmt

— End Wokeness (@EndWokeness) July 18, 2024

You have to go to college to think that up.

Memorial Day at Forest Hill Cemetery in Madison, Wisconsin.

Photos by Meade.

ADDED: Meade's video of the crowd listening to the Military Service Medley by the VFW 1318 Band:

In the land of LBJ.

We drove out into the hill country to see the birthplace of President Lyndon Johnson:

 

"which piece of public art in Madison disturbs you most?"

A topic of discussion at r/madisonwi.

There are so many to choose from, but the biggest rivalry is between "Flayed Bucky by the Best Western on Highland by UW Hospital" and "The sculpture of the parents reaching out to their dead child in the cemetery on Speedway Road."

About that dead child sculpture, someone says:

I actually like that sculpture, although I'm probably not in the majority. If you ask me "how can I feel more alive?" I'd parrot Martin Heidegger, "spend more time in graveyards."

EDIT: Now that I know it's a "memorial" against abortion I don't like it anymore.

There's also "The turd on top of a pyramid on Regent Street" and the "crowning woman" and "The pale yellow man resting on the bike bridge at Jenifer Street." And "The plaques along Picnic Point that showcase monetary donations and ego over nature and historically sacred land." 

Way too many people bring up the "footballs penis" and need to be told that was excised.

It's pretty hilarious that there was such a wealth of bad public art around here to choose from. 

"He doesn’t dispute the fact that people are buried on his land or that the area is steeped in Revolutionary significance..."

"... his vision for the IHOP involves a wait staff in tricorne hats and bonnets. But it was still a bit of a mystery exactly whose bones were buried on his property and who put them there. And, besides, if there really were hundreds of soldiers beneath the ground, Broccoli believed it to be self-evident that he was the one pursuing the vision of life, liberty, and happiness that George Washington’s troops had fought and died for: the right to sell pancakes where they were buried...."

From "The Battle of Fishkill/When Domenic Broccoli set out to expand his IHOP empire upstate, he didn’t expect to find a grave site — or start a war" (NY Magazine).

There's a misplaced modifier — "where they were buried" — but still, I like that passage. I love that a restaurant guy is named Broccoli, but he sells pancakes. And I love that it's IHOP — which is the first place that ever employed me and also iconic in the writings of David Sedaris. And Broccoli's opponents are colorful and sometimes dressed in Revolutionary War outfits.

Headstone cleaner?!

We're repainting the rooms in the 100-year-old part of our house, and — instead of, once again, painting around the brass hardware on the windows and in the closets — for the first time, these various pieces got removed. Every time the trim had been repainted, the painter had slopped some paint onto the metal, and each painter, it seems, felt as though they were only following the paint-slopping tradition. On the window handles, I myself had recently chosen to close up the gaps and paint the entire surface.

But all those hooks in the coat closet looked like a lot of trouble to paint around, and we got the idea to unscrew everything. Was this going to involve paint stripper? No! I looked it up on the internet, and it turns out what you need is a crockpot. So we did unscrew all the window and closet hardware — 30 items, plus over 100 screws — and cook them overnight in water and Dawn detergent. 

"Human composting — or, as it’s sometimes referred to, natural organic reduction — fulfills many people’s desire to nurture the earth after dying."

"It owes much of its present form to Katrina Spade, a Washington-based designer and entrepreneur who told me that her goal is to see 'composting overtake cremation as the default American deathcare in the next couple of decades.' In 2015, as an architecture student, Ms. Spade launched a nonprofit called the Urban Death Project, envisioning strolling past the brownstones of Brooklyn and coming upon a municipal human composting facility. Here, passersby would reflect on mortality and the cycle of life, feeling a sense of connection to the earth, past and future — the way urban cemeteries like Green-Wood were designed to make repose in death a harmonious part of city life..."

From "If You Want to Give Something Back to Nature, Give Your Body" by Caitlin Doughty (NYT).

But we're told the New York State Catholic Conference has said this process “is more appropriate for vegetable trimmings and eggshells than for human bodies.”  

"I wish I could say that the French Alps healed me. That I basked in their beauty and found the spiritual rest and direction I was seeking."

"But Grenoble frightened me. I heard stories of midday muggings where victims were pepper sprayed. Once, I saw two cars in a parking lot engulfed in flames. Another time, a rock shattered the bus window next to my face while I rode home from work, scattering glass fragments across the seat."

Writes Susanne Parker Loelius, in "To Find Love, Rub the (Bronze) Bulge/Groping a statue seemed a little odd, but entire tour groups were doing it, so I did too. And voilà!" (NYT).

"I tried to visit Eve’s tomb once in Saudi Arabia."

"For some Muslims, tradition holds that the grave site of the woman who is the biblical Eve is in the Red Sea city of Jeddah (the Arabic word for 'grandmother'). The cemetery’s caretaker said no women were allowed in.... The [Depp/Heard] trial resonated because it was a primary story. We find depictions of vertiginous falls compelling. It is human nature to be fascinated by stories that echo how our nature became human, in darker respects, once Adam and Eve were demoted to mere mortals. According to the Book of Genesis and 'Paradise Lost,' the sort of behavior described in the sordid defamation trial — jealousy, violence, excess, overindulgence — came as a result of Eve giving in to Satan and Adam giving in to Eve.... And what could be more Edenic than Depp’s $100-million property portfolio...?"

Writes Maureen Dowd, in "Johnny and Amber: Trouble in Paradise" (NYT).

Dowd is distancing herself from the sordid detail of Depp's proving he'd been defamed. Let's back way the hell off and see only the vague outlines of the timeless myth of Man and Woman.

But who knew they had Eve's tomb somewhere?

Am I more Jewish than Elvis?

I'm reading "Display of mother’s Star of David headstone revives talk of Elvis’s Jewish roots/60 years after her death, a new exhibition showcases the headstone of Elvis Presley’s mother, Gladys, featuring both the Jewish symbol and a cross, designed by Elvis himself" in the Times of Israel:

Stories of Elvis’s Jewish heritage have long been in circulation, but when it comes to a legend like Presley — whose death is not even considered settled fact in some quarters — it’s not always easy  to separate fact from fiction. With [his mother's] headstone now on public display and an accompanying sign proclaiming 'Gladys’ Jewish heritage,' the 'Jewish roots' of the King of Rock and Roll are a talking point again.... Angie Marchese, Graceland’s vice president of archives and exhibits, is certain of Elvis’s Jewish ancestry. Marchese says Elvis’s maternal great-great-grandmother was a Jewish woman named Nancy Burdine.

When I read that, I said out loud: "I'm as Jewish as Elvis!" But about 2 seconds later, I thought, no, but am I more Jewish than Elvis or less Jewish than Elvis. I have — as I recently figured out — not just 2 Jewish great-great-grandparents, but a Jewish great-grandparent (their son who married a Christian). That would seem to make me more Jewish than Elvis? But my Jewish great-grandparent was male, and his daughter was my father's mother, so if Jewishness is matrilineal, then I'm not Jewish at all. 

But does that make me less Jewish than Elvis?

"Some owners even chose to be buried at the pet cemetery, since they could not be buried alongside their pets at human cemeteries..."

"'It was so important for some people that they stay together that they decided to be interred in a pet cemetery.'"

From "The Most Popular Pet Name of the Century (Maybe)/A survey of tombstones from the oldest continually operating pet cemetery in the U.S. reveals a passion for 'Princess'" (NYT). 

The quote is from Allison C. Meier, "a writer and licensed New York City sightseeing guide who gives tours of the city’s cemeteries." 

Another quote from Meier: "The way that people refer to their pets changes. On a lot of old dog graves, they call them a gentleman — like, 'He’s a great gentleman. He lived like a gentleman.'"

The original meaning of "gentleman" is "A man of gentle birth, or having the same heraldic status as those of gentle birth; properly, one who is entitled to bear arms, though not ranking among the nobility... but also applied to a person of distinction without precise definition of rank" (OED).

Later — and by later, I mean in the 16th century — it became "A man of superior position in society, or having the habits of life indicative of this; often, one whose means enable him to live in easy circumstances without engaging in trade, a man of money and leisure. In recent use often employed (esp. in ‘this gentleman’) as a more courteous synonym for ‘man’, without regard to the social rank of the person referred to." And apparently, without regard to the species of the being referred to.

Are you teaching your sons to be gentlemen (with or without the use of that word)? Are you teaching your dogs? 

The 12-foot-tall Chamberlin Rock — in the news these days as racist — is featured as a climbing destination at Mountain Project.

It's one of the "the classic, most popular, highest rated climbing routes in this area" — "UW Madison Campus Bouldering":

 

The route is marked:

There's "Chamberlin Rock East Arete":

Sit start and work your way up the arete using holds on both sides of the corner. Top out. In my opinion this is the best problem on this rock.

In the comments there:

Found some more routes on this little boulder. Hang below the plaque and climb and top out at top left corner. If you avoid using your feet on the ledge you started with it is a bit tougher V2-V3. You can also start on the southwest arete of the boulder and traverse right. If you avoid the top ridge until you top out in the center of the boulder I would rate it as a V3.

The climbers are looking for what they seem to call "problems." Ah, yes... in bouldering, a "problem" is the path you take up the rock. 

We also see this word — "problem" — in critical theory. From the Wikipedia article "Problematization": 

Problematization of a term, writing, opinion, ideology, identity, or person is to consider the concrete or existential elements of those involved as challenges (problems) that invite the people involved to transform those situations. It is a method of defamiliarization of common sense....

You can also look at the rock in a political/social-justice way and figure out the best problem. Indeed, that has been done, and the rock was determined to contain racism. This problem is not a route for climbing but something that requires people to say things about the rock until the authorities feel that their best route — their path for overcoming criticism — is to get rid of the rock. 

The Wisconsin State Journal reports:

The 70-ton boulder is officially known as Chamberlin Rock in honor of Thomas Crowder Chamberlin, a geologist and former university president. But the rock was referred to at least once after it was dug out of the hill as a “n*****head,” a commonly used expression in the 1920s to describe any large dark rock. The Campus Planning Committee unanimously voted last week to recommend to Chancellor Rebecca Blank that the boulder be removed from Observatory Hill. Blank has previously indicated she supports the rock’s removal, though a timeline for removal has not been established. 

The Wisconsin Black Student Union called for the rock’s removal over the summer. President Nalah McWhorter said the rock is a symbol of the daily injustices that students of color face on a predominantly white campus. “This is a huge accomplishment for us,” she said on Wednesday. “We won’t have that constant reminder, that symbol that we don’t belong here.”... 

But the rock was referred to at least once... That one verified usage of the term was in The Wisconsin State Journal in 1925. Oddly enough, this new WSJ article has the word written out. I put in asterisks in the quote, above. Go to the link. They've written it out!

It’s unclear whether or for how long people on campus referred to the boulder as “N*****head Rock.”...

Whoa! They did it twice!

Kacie Butcher, the university’s public history project director, told the Campus Planning Committee... that the rock’s removal presents an opportunity to prioritize students of color and engage in complex conversations.

Complex conversations! If we can have complex conversations, why do we need to move ancient boulders?  

The rock’s next destination has yet to be decided. Options include burying the rock at its original resting place, breaking up and disposing of the rock, or moving the rock to the Ice Age Trail.... Carried by glaciers from perhaps as far north as Canada, the boulder was excavated from the side of Observatory Hill in 1925. Geochronology professor Brad Singer told the committee the department prefers it be relocated so instructors can continue using it as a teaching tool.

And here's a big complication: 

UW-Madison needs to secure approval from the Wisconsin Historical Society before removal begins because the rock is located near an effigy mound. The first step requires UW-Madison to submit a request to disturb a catalogued burial site. All Native Tribes of Wisconsin are notified during the process, which can take 60 to 90 days and includes a 30-day comment period.

A complex conversation topic: Do the Native American Tribes of Wisconsin have more moral authority on this question than the Black Student Union?

Officials estimate the cost of removal ranges from $30,000 to $75,000.

Another complex conversation topic: Is this the best use of the next $30,000 to $75,000 the University spends on racial harmony?

After the rock is removed, the Black Student Union’s focus will shift to generating ideas for how students of color can reclaim the space, such as installing a piece of art, McWhorter said. “So it becomes a way to celebrate instead of having it as an empty space reminding us of what it once was,” she said.

Oh, no! Public art! If only we could see the artwork before the rock is removed and vote on whether the rock is better than the art. It's unlikely that the artwork will be better than an empty unobstructed view, and the rock is highly aesthetically pleasing... except for the plaque. Here's my suggestion — maybe we can have a complex conversation about this — how about just changing the plaque on the rock? Of course, the plaque never said "n*****head." It was always just honoring Professor Chamberlin. Write something new. Use words. Don't destroy the rock. And don't disrupt the Indian burial ground. 

The main reason to stick to the demand that the rock be destroyed or carted away is that you have a demonstrable, physical result — you demanded, they acceded to your demand — and that sets you up perfectly for your next demand... presumably, to take down the statue of Abraham Lincoln.

This headline is idiotically miswritten: "Rep. Wasserman Schultz calls on VA: Replace headstones with swastikas."

Is it wrong to laugh about the idea of the Veterans Administration yanking out gravestones and installing swastikas? No one could have thought of such an idea. It could only be created unintentionally by a writer's ineptitude. But can we laugh, or are swastikas too serious of a matter?

I'd prefer to talk about the actual proposal, reported in The Jerusalem Post:

Earlier this week, the Military Religious Freedom Foundation called on Veterans Affairs to replace the headstones on the graves of German prisoners of war who died in US internment camps during World War II. Two are in a Houston cemetery and another is in Salt Lake City. In addition to the swastikas, the tombstones include the phrase “He died far from his home for the Führer, people, and fatherland.”...

In response, a VA spokesman cited an agency policy “to protect historic resources, including those that recognize divisive historical figures or events.”

“I call on the VA to eliminate this antiquated policy and immediately replace these inappropriate and insensitive headstones,” Wasserman Schultz said.

So there are 3 tombstones — in all of the cemeteries tended by the VA — and they stand over individual bodies of young men who died — long ago — as prisoners of war.  Is it an "antiquated policy" to leave these old monuments alone? Respect for the dead, for their (or someone's) freedom of speech, and for leaving historical things as they are — what is "antiquated" about these reasons?

"Emma, a healthy Shih Tzu mix, was euthanized recently because her owner left explicit instructions in her will..."

"The fur baby was to be put down — and laid to rest with her. 'Heartbroken' shelter volunteers at Chesterfield County Animal Services — where Emma had a two-week reprieve from death — said she was a well-bred, pampered and much-loved pup. They appealed to the executor of the dead woman’s estate, begging them to not go through with ending Emma’s life — but their pleas were ignored.... After she was cremated, her ashes were placed in an urn and returned to the 'authorized representative of the estate,' following her owner’s last wishes to the letter.... 'WTF!!! people don’t care for animals in life or death!!! this is heartless, inhumane, and pitiful!!!!,' one particularly heated [tweet] reads. 'And the people who killed said dog are even more trash!!' While killing healthy pets so they can be interned with owners is sparking ethical debates on social media, the law is crystal clear, says Larry Spiaggi, president of the Virginia Funeral Directors Association. 'It’s not legal to put a dog’s cremated remains — or any animal — in a casket and bury them,' says Spiaggi as his chocolate Lab, Peace, trots laps around him."

I'm reading "Healthy dog euthanized to be buried with dead owner as her will requested") in the NY Post.

First, the word is "interred" (not "interned").

Second, the article is clear that the dog cannot and will not be "be buried with dead owner," so that headline is pathetic. The dog was killed and cremated ashes were given to the estate. And the quoted funeral expert explained the law on the subject. It's one thing to have your dog killed, and you can do that, but putting nonhuman animal remains in a cemetery is outlawed. I can see why. One lady might want her dog in her casket with her, but the other people using the cemetery don't want it to be a pet cemetery.

Third, I'll leave it to you to discuss how awful it is to dictate that your dog be put down when you die. I wonder exactly what the thinking was. I imagine the woman believed and wanted to believe that the dog was so completely bonded to her that it could not live with another person and it would require a mercy killing without her. Or maybe she believed that the dog would be released to join her in the afterlife. It's not necessary to judge the dead woman to be a horrible person, even though I don't like that the dog was killed.

The actor Luke Perry was — according to his daughter — laid to rest in a "mushroom burial suit."

View this post on Instagram

💋In December I went to San Francisco with two of my best friends. One of them, had never never been to California, so we went to show him the Redwoods. I took this picture while we were there, because i thought, “damn, those mushrooms are beautiful.” Now, mushrooms hold an entirely new meaning for me. Any explanation i give will not do justice to the genius that is the mushroom burial suit, but it is essentially an eco friendly burial option via mushrooms. All i can say is that you should all look into them at coeio.com or just by googling “mushroom burial suit” . My dad discovered it, and was more excited by this than I have ever seen him. He was buried in this suit, one of his final wishes. They are truly a beautiful thing for this beautiful planet, and I want to share it with all of you.

A post shared by Sophie Perry (@lemonperry) on May 3, 2019 at 4:53am PDT

"The burial of former President George Herbert Walker Bush on the grounds of his presidential library and museum at Texas A&M University on Thursday raises a question."

"Is it possible for former President Barack Obama to be laid to rest at his presidential center in Chicago?"

The Chicago Sun Times comes up with that question.

For now, the answer is no, according to a Bill McCaffrey, a spokesman for the City of Chicago Law Department. Burials in Chicago can only take place in cemeteries, according to city ordinances. The 19.3 acres in Jackson Park to be the site of the Obama Presidential Center is not a legal cemetery.

Noted.