७ एप्रिल, २०२४

"I’ve always tried to say yes to the voice that tells me I should go out and do something now, even when that decision seems wildly impractical."

"A few years ago, with very little planning, my family and I got in a car and drove 600 miles to a goat farm in central Oregon, where we camped out for four days to watch a solar eclipse. I once jetted off to Germany on two days’ notice, spending a week exploring Dresden and hiking through the Black Forest...."

Wrote Amy Ettinger, last August, in "I am dying at age 49. Here’s why I have no regrets. Life is all about a series of moments, and I plan to spend as much remaining time as I can savoring each one" (WaPo).

I'm reading that today not because it happens to contain a reference to a solar eclipse, but because it is linked in "My dying wife hoped to inspire people with her essay. They ended up inspiring her. Not everyone has moments of clarity when they find out they are dying. My wife did" (WaPo, free-access link).

१९ टिप्पण्या:

MadisonMan म्हणाले...

You can have no regrets by recognizing that the choices you make are the best ones you can make at any one time given the information you have. Stop second-guessing yourself!

Leland म्हणाले...

My neighbor is day by day on hospice. Friday, she texted she hoped not to wake up the next day. She's still here, and I can make no judgement as to whether that is good or bad. She has cancer. I can't help but feel for her husband and best friend knowing any moment he will lose her.
This morning at breakfast, we went to our regular restaurants where we were greeted by the other regulars. A phone rings, a regular man answer his mobile, and he gets the news that his son just succumbed to his cancer at age 46, one year after the son lost his wife to the same disease.
I visited my mom yesterday. She's in assisted living. We enjoyed some bingo with the others at the center. It was great to see Mom. A few hours later, my sister called. Mom fell on the way to dinner. She went to the ER to get a clean x-ray and CT scan, but her blood pressure was way too high and her liver enzymes are a bit high. Mom made it back home a little after midnight and is doing fine today.
I'm glad to get out this weekend with my wife. We spent time with both daughters, mom, sister and her family, and my in-laws. No regrets. I'm also to be happy safe at home with just mundane chores to do.

Joe Smith म्हणाले...

Bruce Pearson: Probably everybody be nice to you if they knew your were dying.

Henry Wiggen: Everybody knows everybody is dying. That is why people are nice. You all die soon enough, so why not be nice to each other?

***

"Do you think you are going to live forever? Is life so long you rather rag somebody than be nice to them?

Mark Harris, 'Bang the Drum Slowly,' America's greatest novel imho...

Oligonicella म्हणाले...

Not "wildly impractical" once I had my daughter, no. I was required to keep her alive, ya see. Things that would impede that I put aside for later.

Amexpat म्हणाले...

Yes, life is all about a series of moments and you should try to have as many of those as you can.

But here's the rub. If you live too recklessly, you'll most likely a have a few great moments at the expense of a short life. And if you play it too safe you could end up with a long, joyless life. Like all things, you should seek the golden mean.

Wa St Blogger म्हणाले...

When I approach the end of life moment, I won’t be thinking I have no regrets due to backpacking through Europe, hiking the Appalachian mountains or hanging off the side of Everest while observing the moon crossing in front of the sun. Had I done those things, I would be regretting wasting that time when I could have been making a difference in someone’s life. It’s not the what but the who that fills life.

Roger This म्हणाले...

Nice, Leland.

gilbar म्हणाले...

she SHOULD have regrets! her MURDEROUS use of CO2, will cause the death of EVERY ONE on EARTH!\
LITERALLY!
EVERY SINGLE PERSON, living on the earth right now.. Will be DEAD! (within a 120 years, or so)
WILL this MASSIVE DIEOUT be caused by her MURDEROUS use of CO2?
Just look at the models!
She Spewed CO2 out into the world, going to "dark forests" and "orgegons"..
and (within 120 years, or so).. EVERY SINGLE PERSON now living will be dead!!

Jamie म्हणाले...

I remember a bit from Stranger In a Strange Land in which a character is monologuing (as characters in Heinlein books often get to doing eventually) about "victory in defeat, there is none greater." He was talking about Rodin's Caryatid Fallen Under Her Stone and opinining that it is an example of someone trying to shoulder an unbearable burden, not giving up even when she knows she can't do it. He compared the sculpture to, among other things, a man dying of cancer who keeps going to work to bring home one more paycheck for his family - this was the '60s, of course.

I've thought about that a lot over the years. Yes, living to the fullest would be great - but what if your fullest life means that your family, or someone else that you love, has a less full life? Why should I care so much if *I* achieve my bucket list, if by doing so I'm relegating someone I love to something less than they might otherwise have? Why am *I* the center of my universe?

traditionalguy म्हणाले...

Pre penicillin days the old folks used to say pneumonia was the old folks friend. You could pass peacefully in your sleep.

Now the world ruling class wants us dead by engineering famines, pandemics, and wars. They are Gaia worshippers and want 95% of the world population eliminated to protect the goddess of the earth.

That’s why the terrible DJT has become our leader. MAGA actually wants us to live.

Narr म्हणाले...

Jamie posits "a man dying of cancer who keeps going to work to bring home one more paycheck for his family - this was the '60s, of course."

That's exactly what my father did. In a week my son will be 38; my father died in 1962 at the age of 39. Life is fleeting.

mikee म्हणाले...

Savoring life doesn't require jetting off to Europe on a whim, although there is nothing wrong with doing that, either. I've had fun watching turbulent water coil out at the end of a laminar flowing fountain spout as well as seeing the sunrises over various mountains.

Dave Begley म्हणाले...

Thanks for the free link and post, Ann.

effinayright म्हणाले...

MadisonMan said...
"You can have no regrets by recognizing that the choices you make are the best ones you can make at any one time given the information you have. Stop second-guessing yourself!"
******************

Oh sure. There is no such thing as a poor decision.

Let's look at your idiotic claim that all decisions are the best at hand. Such as driving down a 65 mph highway at 90 mph just to make up some time. Any information to tell you that's not a wise choice?

Or how about a pilot who decides to take his jet into a sharp low-altitude turn he KNOWS from his flight manual will cause the plane to stall and plummet into the ground. [This happens about twice a month with small single/dual engine aircraft.]

Or how about....just this once....following up on that email message you got saying you have won a prize, alongside several other emails claiming you've ALSO won a prize for something else?

Best information, my ass.

SNORT

Rusty म्हणाले...

In keeping with this morbid topic. The crematorium at the motuary burned down tonight. My wife wondered what I was laughing about.

RNB म्हणाले...

“The crematorium at the mortuary burned down last night.” Kipling’s ‘The Undertaker’s Horse’ might give you a smile this morning.

RNB म्हणाले...

“The crematorium at the mortuary burned down last night.” Kipling’s “The Undertaker’s Horse” might give you a smile this morning.

Banzel म्हणाले...

Several recent posta about 'asweful' semi-spiritual experiences based on carbon-intensive travel. Yet there are no questions or commentary about whether these individuals support chastising and imposing regulatory expenses onto others for driving to work or the store.

Nice म्हणाले...

A rare "free" article not hidden behind a paywall.

I've been to Santa Cruz many times. A truly magical place in terms of nature, spectacular vistas, the laid-back bohemian vibe, Monterey, Steinbeck, Cannery Row, all less than an half-hours drive, Big Sur a little beyond that. I love all the things the Author, Ms. Ettinger loves about Santa Cruz, with one exception; I cannot ever imagine wanting to die in that location.

There is no Healthcare in Santa Cruz. There's a few little clinics here and there, but there's no major medical center. UC Santa Cruz doesn't have a medical school, and the closest legitimate teaching hospitals and research are in San Francisco, which is 3 hours away by car.

It all seems so idyllic to move to these romantic small towns, until you get sick and need top-notch care, but then again, if you are end-stage anyway, perhaps state-of-the-art treatment isn't really the priority.