१६ मार्च, २०२२

"It's kind of what you hope happens with your kid, that your voice gets in their head and helps guide them through difficult stuff..."

"... but you know, a metaphorical voice in the head that eventually it becomes their own voice as they develop into their own people. Neeah had come to rely on a literal voice and just her mom's presence. Neeah heard from her mom so much during the day, through the cameras or on FaceTime, she missed knowing what her mom was up to at any given moment. She says it's actually what she missed most — tracking her mom's day in parallel with her school day. It felt scary to lose that."

From an excellent episode of "This American Life," "School's Out Forever," about the troubles some children are having readjusting to in-person school after all the time they spent out of school during the pandemic. 

At the age of 9, Neeah spent the day home alone, trying to do her schoolwork via computer; and her mother went to work, but kept a camera on the child at all times, and spoke to her often, telling her what to do and what not to do. The child got so used to the constant surveillance and maternal orders that she found it disturbing to go without it.

Here's Neeah's description of how she felt, going back to school: "Yeah, in the snap of a finger, I'm like, oh, crap. And my mom's not going to be here to be — like, be here to watch over me, tell me to focus. Like, how am I going to do this? How am I going to do that without her telling me what to do? And that's when I started getting these panic attacks."

१५ टिप्पण्या:

wildswan म्हणाले...

It'd be hard to shift in a day from constant-Mom to back-to-school. But she won't be alone in having difficulties of one kind or another; she'll fit right in.

n.n म्हणाले...

Planned parent/hood included, mandates that follow the cargo cult, offer viable legal indemnity, and normalize present, progressive, and forward-looking collateral damage. Think of the kids... who, in the presence of viruses and other pathogens, can never take off their masks, and will have to wear goggles. The eyes are windows to viral and social contagion.

Rob म्हणाले...

Ron Klain serves this function for Joe Biden.

Sebastian म्हणाले...

"How am I going to do that without her telling me what to do? And that's when I started getting these panic attacks."

Just one of the scars inflicted by old people on young people in the cruel and selfish pursuit of safety.

Assistant Village Idiot म्हणाले...

It may not be the situation that triggered the panic attacks. We have a bias toward what we expect to be the answer in the emergence of depression, anxiety disorders, phobias, psychosis - just about any mental-health condition. We make up explanations because we are story-making people. As school restarts we will see instances of various disorders - and we can compare the number to what emerged before covid. We won't really know much before then.

It is nice to think that we will get some advance warning from the teachers and school counselors who have the before-and-after experience and can make comparisons. Unfortunately, these are some of the most agenda-driven, data-hating people in the society and we have to apply a steep discount to their assertions.

And journalists looking for stories. What could possibly go wrong there?

Wince म्हणाले...

Funny, this reminds me of My Mother the Car. A show that dominates my earliest memories of evening television, probably because I found the concept of mother trapped in a machine so jarring at that tender age.

Bender म्हणाले...

"Oh crap" "Like" "Panic attacks"

This is not the language of a normal nine-year-old.

Steve Pitment म्हणाले...

Turns out that the folks that blithely pushed school closings and masks on children are guilty of monstrous acts that have deeply damaged tens of millions of innocent young lives. What us the appropriate response? Can we really allow these people to live and work among us going forward?

What sort of penance and punishment are required before we can move forward? In a just world they would at least be stripped of all of their material wealth and banished from all positions of authority for life - possibly branded on their foreheads to prevent them ever escaping responsibility and blame.

Josephbleau म्हणाले...

"... but you know, a metaphorical voice in the head that eventually it becomes their own voice as they develop into their own people. Neeah had come to rely on a literal voice and just her mom's presence. "

This is a very apt description of how God was created. If your parent and grandparents remember the old wisdom and tell it to the kids, they hear the voice of righteousness as they conduct themselves. Over the years this code of wisdom is conceived to be a higher synthesized voice of God that becomes a religion. So when people hear in their heads, "don't cross the street on red, don't sack that village, they are listening to the word of God, telling them to live better lives.

Don't steal my new thesis topic, now.

iowan2 म्हणाले...

Fear.
Two kinds, Fear of losing what you have, or fear of not getting what you desire.

The girl is losing the safety of mom, replaced by a figure that requires results.

I used to work for a company that expanded to a new location through purchase of an existing location, about on per year. I volunteered to spend two weeks on site training staff on the new computer systems and staff hierarchy. Who to contact, when, and how. explain and demonstrate the corporate culture. Basically, customer service, and measurable metrics.
After I had done three years in a row, the fourth was different. A staff of 50, lost 5 people after the first three days. Turned out the fear of being required to produce by measurables in the accounting system freaked them out. I explained there was more than enough opportunity to skate, but output was required. The old culture much more forgiving.
I sense the girl was afraid of once again being held accountable to a person, that is not mom.

farmgirl म्हणाले...

There’s so much to say-
It’s a sad shape of people moving on up.

1st world kids.
Where their imagination is enemy #1.
I wonder what the world’s gonna look like 30 yrs from now.

tommyesq म्हणाले...

Lockdowns end, women and children hit hardest.

Tina848 म्हणाले...

I saw this differently than most. It seemed she liked the interaction with her mom, and felt unmoored at school. The school lacked the structure her mom has put in place. I have a few friends who home school, their kids feel the connection like this young lady does. The school is large, impersonal, and unsteady. The change to this is giving her anxiety.

Schools are institutions and not all are great. Bullies, Cliques, inadequate teachers, class disruptions, kids who don't want to learn, delays, boredom, etc. If you got away from that for two years, and had structure with your mom, would you REALLY want to go back?

Lea S. म्हणाले...

Having once been a kid who spent hours playing in the woods by herself, this kind of dependence absolutely floors me. I'll add that I was homeschooled and didn't experience that level of being told what to do at all times.

TheOne Who Is Not Obeyed म्हणाले...

Big Brother has been replaced by Big Mother in this child's life.

She'll get over it.