६ ऑक्टोबर, २०२२

"I had some reasons I just couldn’t stay in that marriage anymore," said Melinda Gates, so vaguely you wonder why there's even an article.

It's pretty much a complete waste of your time to read "Melinda Gates on ‘unbelievably painful’ divorce: ‘I just couldn’t stay in that marriage’" in the NY Post. You won't get a clue what was so painful and why she just had to leave.

Do you care that she cried? I'm not reading the newspaper every day to find out who happened to have cried recently. A lot of people have cried, and the fact that they've cried and are billionaires isn't newsworthy. It's aggravating to be asked to empathize with this woman who walked away with billions when there's no detail about what Bill Gates did.

From the comments section over there is rife with speculation: "She also previously mentioned, his name connected to the Lolita Express also helped her in the decision making process of a divorce"/"Gates is one of the many reasons we the American people will NEVER see the Epstein madam's list of clientele. I bet 100 percent that he is on there."

४१ टिप्पण्या:

Kai Akker म्हणाले...

Insipid article, that's the truth. All those "best"s. At least she didn't lean in on something.

The pandemic helped her make the decision, caught my eye. Fine, I can well believe it. Many changes precipitated from that. But if only she had kept Bill a little busier, the world might have been a lot better off by escaping some of his planning and vaccinating hubris.

Kevin म्हणाले...

Don't let yourself go
'Cause everybody cries
Everybody hurts sometimes

Dave Begley म्हणाले...

Yes, Gates is a criminal. It’s called statutory rape. He also cheated on his wife.

IMO, Melinda needs to call him out. She’s got her money. Nothing Bill can do about it now. Unless there is an NDA.

Or, better yet, instead of wasting her money on saving the planet, she can become an anti-statutory rape crusader.

Enigma म्हणाले...

First, women initiate about 70% of all divorces. Female crying and unhappiness and depression and malaise and anxiety is not a surprise. Billionaire or not.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-new-resilience/201508/women-initiate-divorce-much-more-men-heres-why


Second, with all the deaths surrounding Epstein we may indeed never see the black book. Perhaps the best strategy is to use social network analysis to examine the social connections of the known associates. This includes Bill Clinton, Prince Andrew, etc. One might discover the majority of those involved from old news reports and charity event attendee lists.

Social network visualization tools generate some of the most interesting graphs around too. E.g.:

https://cambridge-intelligence.com/use-cases/social-networks/

Sally327 म्हणाले...
ही टिप्पणी लेखकाना हलविली आहे.
Sally327 म्हणाले...

I don't think the fact that she's wealthy should make her less sympathetic as divorce can be incredibly painful and difficult and so on. I am of the mind, though, that it's possible she was the real problem in the marriage. We (I) start out assuming that Bill was the jerk, the creep, the bad husband and that she was the saint, the blameless one. But he's not saying anything. That seems to happen a lot, the woman talks and the man says nothing and the woman looks like the victim and the man the one at fault.

Brad Pitt is getting fried right now for being a horrible husband and father, at least according to the pleadings I guess, which have made their way into the news, and maybe it's all true who knows? He is pushing back against the allegations but to little effect I think.

gilbar म्हणाले...

were any of The Reasons anything besides the fact Bill likes f*cking little children?

gilbar म्हणाले...

Dave Begley said...
Nothing Bill can do about it now. Unless there is an NDA.

of COURSE there is an NDA

Iman म्हणाले...

The rot is pervasive.

Temujin म्हणाले...

Sally327: "We (I) start out assuming that Bill was the jerk, the creep,..."

Yes, of course. We do that based on the evidence of our own senses. And?...

michaele म्हणाले...

The only name that would have leaked "bigly" from the Epstein black book is Donald Trump's The fact that it hasn't says it wasn't on the list.

Howard म्हणाले...

Gates is Harvey Weinstein in Mr. Roger's Clothing

Bob Boyd म्हणाले...

He couldn't get it up unless he watched her eat bugs.

Bitter Clinger म्हणाले...

Enigma, the most interesting thing about that article is that it is an excellent example of Althouse's rule (or is it Glenn Reynold's rule?) that everything must be reported in a way that flatters women.

The report suggests that women initiate divorce 70% of the time because "often [it is] the woman who expresses more overt conflict and dissatisfaction about the state of the marriage. On the other hand, the man is more likely to report feeling troubled by his wife’s dissatisfaction, but pretty much “OK” with the way things are; he's content to just lope along as time passes."

Later they point out that non-marriage relationships are ended about equally by men and women. Of course they suggest that it must be because such relationships are more egalitarian.

Here's an alternative hypothesis that would never see the light of day in a psychology journal or news story: Woman initiate divorce 70% of the time because they have unrealistic expectations for their marriage and they don't take the marriage vow as seriously as do men. This hypothesis explains why women are dissatisfied with their marriage when their husbands think everything "is pretty much ok" (women have unrealistic expectations) and the disparity in who ends marriages and non-marriages (men are more likely to stick to their marriage commitment).

Jefferson's Revenge म्हणाले...

I read the interview and wondered why she gave it and why they printed it. It was literally about nothing. It’s like the end of the Fox show The Five when they take 10 minutes to shill for friends’s products, charities or their own shows.

With all of the things to discuss, this is what you choose?

Ann Althouse म्हणाले...

"Woman initiate divorce 70%..."

Does that mean women *file* for divorce 70% of the time? Because it's a longstanding tradition to have the woman file against the man. A man who wants a divorce may nevertheless accept or actively want the woman to file.

Bitter Clinger म्हणाले...

Althouse: "Does that mean women *file* for divorce 70% of the time? Because it's a longstanding tradition to have the woman file against the man. A man who wants a divorce may nevertheless accept or actively want the woman to file."

I'm not sure about that, but the article does state that in couples the author, a therapist, counseled, the woman was much more likely to express dissatisfaction.

In the era of no fault divorce, why would it matter whether the woman or man files? Genuinely curious.

gilbar म्हणाले...

i the marriages that i've known or seen..
Most the wife demands to divorce the husband (maybe 70%)
The other times (30%?), it's the husband's girl friend that demanded the divorce.

I've NEVER seen the guy decide to... EVER

Enigma म्हणाले...

@Bitter Clinger: "Woman initiate divorce 70% of the time because they have unrealistic expectations for their marriage"

@Althouse: "Does that mean women *file* for divorce 70% of the time?"

There are libraries full of research on male versus female social and mating strategies. From what I've read, all follows from the economics of reproduction and follows age-old stereotypes (which are generally valid). Men seek youth, health (beauty is a proxy for averageness and health), and personality stability, while women seek economic and emotional support for childrearing.

Men can impregnate women in "a minute" and go away, so they are less attached unless committed through marriage and/or children. Then they become protective of their offspring and their offspring's mothers. Women can be 'fine' with all sorts of fat, ugly, and unappealing men as long as they are solid, kind, and supportive providers. This follows from the economic demands of pregnancy and raising small children -- they end up with an 18 year commitment after a man's minute of pleasure.

Men tend to wander off to new mates as their spouses reach menopause, while women with children often stay linked to their children into adulthood.

Women file for divorce if their mates are not financially supportive, not emotionally supportive, or not interested in them. Men may stick around for the domestic support and stability but also keep mistresses / prostitutes on the side. Visit Japan and see for yourself. There are many younger kept women (in public settings), and even some married women work on the side as part-time prostitutes.

Men tend to be cold-blooded accurate in judging women's attractiveness (i.e., ratings result in bell curve normal distributions) while women tend to have a highly elevated sense of self-worth (e.g., "stuck up" or "choosy") and harshly downgrade most men. These [almost certainly biologically based] decision biases logically follow from the economics of children -- a non-choosy woman ends up broke, single, and stuck taking care of perhaps unwanted children. (Insert abortion politics here.)

Lurker21 म्हणाले...

It seemed like a prudent and sensible match.

They were equally unattractive and creepy.

But when an unattractive and creepy man has billions he comes to think he deserves more.

Howard म्हणाले...

Jordan Peterson explains why women file for divorce way more than men:

Chaos, the eternal feminine, is also the crushing force of sexual selection. Women are choosy maters (unlike female chimps, their closest animal counterparts). Most men do not meet female human standards. It is for this reason that women on dating sites rate 85 percent of men as below average in attractiveness. It is for this reason that we all have twice as many female ancestors as male (imagine that all the women who have ever lived have averaged one child. Now imagine that half the men who have ever lived have fathered two children, if they had any, while the other half fathered none).41 It is Woman as Nature who looks at half of all men and says, “No!” For the men, that’s a direct encounter with chaos, and it occurs with devastating force every time they are turned down for a date. Human female choosiness is also why we are very different from the common ancestor we shared with our chimpanzee cousins, while the latter are very much the same. Women’s proclivity to say no, more than any other force, has shaped our evolution into the creative, industrious, upright, large-brained (competitive, aggressive, domineering) creatures that we are.42 It is Nature as Woman who says, “Well, bucko, you’re good enough for a friend, but my experience of you so far has not indicated the suitability of your genetic material for continued propagation.

traditionalguy म्हणाले...

Wisconsin must be different. In Georgia the divorce lawyers always want the wife to be first to file. They want her to be seen as a helpless victim that needs protection. Courts protect the victims. Men want to be seen as totally innocent guys. But a man filing first makes him appear a pushy powerful guy wanting to get rid of an innocent older woman as if she no longer exists. Of course in community property States or “total no fault”States none of that matters. The jury is not deciding property division. It’s all split with trial judge mediation on inherited property issues and level of any marital support.

Lars Porsena म्हणाले...

"Gates is one of the many reasons we the American people will NEVER see the Epstein madam's list of clientele. I bet 100 percent that he is on there."

If Trump was on that list, I bet 100% it would have been revealed.

BIII Zhang म्हणाले...

"when there's no detail about what Bill Gates did."

Maybe Bill Gates didn't do anything. Like, maybe he looked at her one day and just said to himself ... "How did I marry a horse? I'm the richest man in the world. Surely I can get some decent looking tail."

Melinda Gates is BUTT UGLY. Maybe she wasn't when they got married or was younger, but she looks like a man now. No dude in his right mind would be hitting that. And certainly no man with the means to purchase any woman he wants (and you better believe that plenty are for sale).

I'm absolutely convinced that Bill Gates was chasing tail because my God, look at her. She's hideous.

BIII Zhang म्हणाले...

"when there's no detail about what Bill Gates did."

Maybe Bill Gates didn't do anything. Like, maybe he looked at her one day and just said to himself ... "How did I marry a horse? I'm the richest man in the world. Surely I can get some decent looking tail."

Melinda Gates is BUTT UGLY. Maybe she wasn't when they got married or was younger, but she looks like a man now. No dude in his right mind would be hitting that. And certainly no man with the means to purchase any woman he wants (and you better believe that plenty are for sale).

I'm absolutely convinced that Bill Gates was chasing tail because my God, look at her. She's hideous.

Michael K म्हणाले...

I think we all have a pretty good idea of why she divorced him and why she took her name off the Foundation.

Free Manure While You Wait! म्हणाले...

The Zsa Zsa Gabor of 21st Century. Or maybe John Kerry would be a better analogy.

mikee म्हणाले...

The built their very expensive 66,000 sqft house in Medina, WA, without breaking up during that experience, which means the reasons for divorce must have been even more stressful and relationship-destroying.

Saint Croix म्हणाले...

ha ha ha

Althouse gave us a beautiful post about a priest, an ugly doll, and a couple of walkie-talkies. It makes me cry. Crying like Reagan, all right, a little misty in the eyes, I'm okay. And I'm like, "Althouse, you made me cry."

Then, I scroll down a couple of posts, and Althouse is bitching about cry-babies! Too funny.

Do you care that she cried? I'm not reading the newspaper every day to find out who happened to have cried recently. A lot of people have cried, and the fact that they've cried and are billionaires isn't newsworthy.

I think it's totally newsworthy. A crying billionaire?

Worldly people expect billionaires to be happy all the time. A lot of people think money = happiness. And so when they hear about unhappy billionaires, they want to know why.

What's disappointing about the article is that the journalist couldn't find out. It was painful and she didn't want to talk about it.

Freeman Hunt म्हणाले...

Agreed. Not news. Nearly all news falls under this non-news category.

Earnest Prole म्हणाले...

Try to see it from Bill Gates’ point of view: You wake up one morning and realize you’re married to an old man dressed up in a little girl’s jumper.

And you may tell yourself, "This is not my beautiful wife.”
And you may tell yourself, "This is not my beautiful house"
And you may ask yourself, "Am I right, am I wrong?"
And you may say to yourself, "My God, what have I done?"

Let the water hold me down.

Robert Cook म्हणाले...

A couple of reasons Melinda divorced Bill:

Bill had an agreement with Melinda to stay with his ex-girlfriend one weekend each year.

Bill was also carrying on with other affairs.

That aside, his cozy, comfy public presentation of recent years belies his actual character: highly competitive, difficult, churlish, snide, intolerant of failings in his subordinates, etc. In short, not so different from Steve Jobs' personality. (However, I believe Jobs was a good family man, faithful to his wife and a good father to his children.)

The Cracker Emcee Refulgent म्हणाले...

"I don't think the fact that she's wealthy should make her less sympathetic as divorce can be incredibly painful and difficult and so on."

Oh, so that's where the dismissive "cry me a river' expression comes from.

They're both demonstrably gobshites and we wouldn't be talking about her if she wasn't a billionaire's succubus.

I know a very hard-working mother of six children who got railroaded in the divorce settlement. Her I feel sympathy for. Melinda Gates can fuck right off.

Howard म्हणाले...

EP quoting from the only rock song about hydrogeology

Howard म्हणाले...

NB. It's a known fact that handsome women have extra testosterone which translates into a higher sex drive. Maybe the bitch was demanding my re from Bill's Microsoft

Left Bank of the Charles म्हणाले...

But not so vague to wonder why there’s even a blog post.

Eva Marie म्हणाले...

Howard, thank you for the excerpt. It’s an interesting perspective on reality. As far as the accusations of cheating, rape that other commenters have made, where’s an article with some sort of proof? I followed Robert Cook’s link and the proof for affairs offered was that sometimes he switched cars during the day.

TestTube म्हणाले...

Robert Cook: Not according to the opera

Leland म्हणाले...

Jeffrey Epstein didn't kill himself 3 years ago. I don't think that just now, Melinda has finally had enough in that regard, unless there is an Epstein replacement that is an open secret to the billionaire and politically connected club.

Bitter Clinger म्हणाले...

EP: Dude, that photo. Compare to photos of their wedding. The Wall was not kind to Melinda.

Howard म्हणाले...

Going along with what Peterson is saying about how half the men don't get to reproduce, all of our Neanderthal genetic material is female. In fact whenever a dominant culture invades a weaker culture only the female genetic material from the weaker culture is preserved.

It's not surprising that these ancient cultures worshiped women. Women were the only source of new Hunters and flint knappers.

But I imagine from time immemorial that the beta males have always complained about women.