1. Broadway Barbara has a new perfume.
2. The Martha and Mary story in the manner of the Kardashians.
4. The secret life hack for thrifting at Goodwill.
5. Your friend who refuses to talk shit.
6. Is this suggestion that he has a long face correct?
7. The dulcet tones of the goat.
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13 comments:
Thank you... thank you for it.. Broadway Barbara.
She comes in at #2 behind the pro-corn kid.
That's how I imagined the story of Mary and Martha when I first heard it in Sunday school at age six. The class was all working-class/farm kids. I think if Jesus had been there we would have told him that Mary should get off her ass and help with the chores. (And Jesus should have offered to help with the dishes. He was a guest, so he would have been told "no," But it would have been nice to offer.)
Number 3 hands down
Drunk calling the police.
#1. Broadway Barbara smells like a winner.
There were a number of good ones. My favourite was the friend who wouldn’t talk shit about someone. “Let that sink in”—I wanted to smack her. “Fuck off” was the correct ending.
I never get tired of goat noises. Never.
I just hope the Oasis at my local Goodwill doesn't become overcrowded because Mr. Blabbermouth pretty much never heard of the down-low, pretty much.
Not talking shit when you're flying on meth is quite an accomplishment. Stoned man stoned.
Oh the goat!
ha ha ha
that is a good southern accent
Jeff Foxworthy does a great drunk conversation with cops.
Welcome back, Officer Mitchell! Don't shoot.
I'm glad you're back, I want to report a crime. Larry puked in the aquarium.
Hey listen, if I lay down on the sidewalk, will you draw my picture with that little chalk y'all have?
Hey Officer Mitchell, I thought you said, you didn't want to come back out here tonight.
(For the funny Yankee version, see John Mulaney)
I immediately sent the Mary and Martha a la Kardashian video to my 3 daughters. Hilarious! I know they’ll think it’s funny, and they’ll also wonder where on earth their dad got access to a TikTok video!
#1 Mary and Martha as Kardashians was primo. Christian humor! Hoping for a followup of Jesus as Mark Zuckerberg.
#2 The goat. Uh ah aaa.... lol Sounds like a fat man trying to squeeze into his seat on an airplane.
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