"Despite a new imperative to be scrupulous about affirmative consent, young men are still subject to incessant messages that sexual conquest... remains the measure of a 'real' man..."

"... and a reliable path to social status. As one high school junior explained, 'Guys need to prove themselves to their guys. So to do that, you’re going to be dominating. You’re going to maybe push. Because, it’s like the girl is just there as a means for him to get off and a means for him to brag.' I never intended to write about boys. As a journalist, I have spent over a quarter of a century chronicling girls’ lives.... ...I found myself wishing, in my conversations with girls, that their early sexual experiences did not have to be, as they so often were, something they had to get over. That will require reducing the harm boys cause, whether out of monstrous venality, entitlement, heedlessness or even (maybe especially) ignorance. [Boys] need a counternarrative to the one that elevates the transactional over the connected, the sensual, the kind; boys need to value mutual gratification in their sexual encounters, whether with one-offs or long-term partners."

From "Will We Ever Figure Out How to Talk to Boys About Sex?/Teenagers and young men still don’t have the right vocabulary. Can we help them get there?" by Peggy Orenstein — author of "Boys & Sex: Young Men on Hookups, Love, Porn, Consent and Navigating the New Masculinity."

From Orenstein's Wikipedia page:

Peggy Orenstein's ideas revolve around the discrepancy between men and women's sexuality. For example, in an interview with 70 women between 15 and 20, she found that the young women were expected to please their sexual partners but did not expect it to be reciprocated.... Orenstein... discusses how the idea of sexual promiscuity for women is a double edged sword... Orenstein... encourages them to walk a fine line between “slut” and “prude.”...

ADDED: Orenstein also has an article in The Atlantic, "The Miseducation of the American Boy/Why boys crack up at rape jokes, think having a girlfriend is 'gay,' and still can’t cry—and why we need to give them new and better models of masculinity." Excerpt:

According to Andrew Smiler, a psychologist who has studied the history of Western masculinity, the ideal late-19th-century man was compassionate, a caretaker, but such qualities lost favor as paid labor moved from homes to factories during industrialization. In fact, the Boy Scouts, whose creed urges its members to be loyal, friendly, courteous, and kind, was founded in 1910 in part to counter that dehumanizing trend. Smiler attributes further distortions in masculinity to a century-long backlash against women’s rights. During World War I, women proved that they could keep the economy humming on their own, and soon afterward they secured the vote. Instead of embracing gender equality, he says, the country’s leaders “doubled down” on the inalienable male right to power, emphasizing men’s supposedly more logical and less emotional nature as a prerequisite for leadership....