१० मार्च, २०१८

Obituary for a porcupine.

How do you get famous enough as a porcupine to warrant an obituary?

"Prehensile-tailed porcupine, father of four, dies at National Zoo" (WaPo):
An animal who died this week at Washington’s National Zoo seemed noteworthy for many reasons, including his place in porcupine propagation.... [With a female prehensile-tailed porcupine, he] produced four youngsters.
"Many reasons"? But no other accomplishment is mentioned! There's some snide talk about how it must be difficult for quilled animals to have sexual intercourse, so I'm left thinking this is here just to do some weird sex talk (giving off a faintly rape-y whiff):
With their covering of sharp quills, porcupines prompt curiosity about their means of mating. In response to “How do porcupines breed?” wags and wits sometimes reply: “Very carefully.”

It does seem an intricate process, in which specialists say quills of the female are made to temporarily lie flat.
made to temporarily lie flat...

And now Clark — that's his name — has been made to lie permanently flat.

२७ टिप्पण्या:

traditionalguy म्हणाले...

Maybe this reward is for maintaining an erection in very risky situations. Brings to mind Playboy Trump taking the high risks for sex rewards. But now Trump's ladies are not keeping their quills flat for what he once offered. They want another chance at sticking him back.

Hagar म्हणाले...

and perhaps to garner some gold.

Char Char Binks, Esq. म्हणाले...

Serves Clark right, after making those lady porcupine quills lie flat for his pleasure.

Bob Boyd म्हणाले...

Clark was the Harvey Weinstein of porcupines.
Unless you wanted to spend your life doing community zoo for the hicks in the sticks, you had to drop your quills for Clark.

Ralph L म्हणाले...

How do you rape a porcupine?

Duct tape. Lots of it.

William म्हणाले...

Never ask for whom the quill pricks......Trump got involved with some prehensile tail, and he is no longer the biggest prick in the tale.

Rusty म्हणाले...

He was a prick anyway.

exhelodrvr1 म्हणाले...

Damn that Trump!!

Bob Boyd म्हणाले...

Here's video of Clark.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eSSIN1AWnqY

rehajm म्हणाले...

The safari guides in Botswana were fascinated and amazed with my stories of the porcupines I see in my yard from time to time. Many of them have never seen a porcupine, only tracks and the occasional quill. They're like ghosts, or Nessie to them...

rehajm म्हणाले...

Father of four...that he knows of!!!

Bob Boyd म्हणाले...

It's against the Code of the West to kill a porcupine.

rhhardin म्हणाले...

A male has his needles.

JML म्हणाले...

It is almost like they got teeth down there...

MadisonMan म्हणाले...

Would it kill the Post to have more obits of women? We get to read about male porcupines instead of some very deserving woman of the Human species.

Ann Althouse म्हणाले...

"The safari guides in Botswana were fascinated and amazed with my stories of the porcupines..."

Were they? Or were they doing safari theater for you and your money?

Ann Althouse म्हणाले...

"Would it kill the Post to have more obits of women? We get to read about male porcupines instead of some very deserving woman of the Human species."

All I can say is there'd better be a WaPo obituary when Bess dies.

tcrosse म्हणाले...

Attention must be paid.

john म्हणाले...

Does this mean 6 more weeks of winter?

gspencer म्हणाले...

"say quills of the female are made to temporarily lie flat"

"are made" to lie flat? You mean the element of consent is not present?

Fritz म्हणाले...

Ann Althouse said...
"Would it kill the Post to have more obits of women? We get to read about male porcupines instead of some very deserving woman of the Human species."

All I can say is there'd better be a WaPo obituary when Bess dies.


Women live longer than men. Once you get that equalized, we'll consider it.

Fernandinande म्हणाले...

Ann Althouse said...
All I can say is there'd better be a WaPo obituary when Bess dies.


Why? To prove the paper is still goofy?

Perhaps equity and fairness - both are important in nature - would be better served by having an obituary for a member of a different species, rather than another obit for the clearly privileged porcupines.

(I saw "Clearly Privileged Porcupines" open for the "Rock Bottom Remainders")

Ambrose म्हणाले...

another male obituary -

exhelodrvr1 म्हणाले...

Maybe Obama can do a Netflix special on this

Darrell म्हणाले...

Clark was euthanized

Still had ObamaCare, most likely. . .

Big Mike म्हणाले...

A long time ago I read that humans and porcupines are the only two mammals that mate face to face (I recollect that the article was illustrated with a porcupine drawn to resemble a missionary). I had forgotten that snippet of information until this Althouse post.

Big Mike म्हणाले...

Come to think of it male and female whales and dolphins must mate belly to belly, too.