Althouse: "A 99-year-old Italian man is divorcing his wife of 77 years after he stumbled across letters she had written to a secret lover in the 1940s."

२३ फेब्रुवारी, २०१२

"A 99-year-old Italian man is divorcing his wife of 77 years after he stumbled across letters she had written to a secret lover in the 1940s."

"The 96-year-old woman, identified in court papers as Rosa C., reportedly confessed to having an affair 60 years ago, and then tried desperately to persuade her hubby to stay.... Once the divorce is finalized, the pair could take the record for world’s oldest divorcees."

२८ टिप्पण्या:

MadisonMan म्हणाले...: I suspect he's had a few TIAs that have changed his personality.; २३/२/१२, १०:१४ AM
edutcher म्हणाले...: You're just getting to this now? It's been around for at least a month.

In any case, keep in mind the Italian Army in WWII was known as the "Army of Love", so hubbo probably got plenty on the side and found out Sweetie was doing a Limey or a Yank.

Or a Kraut.; २३/२/१२, १०:१६ AM
Carol_Herman म्हणाले...: The secret is out. Monogamy stinks. People have secret affairs. And, sometimes, this produces children.

The CLUE is that she SAVED the love letters! Now, why would she do that?

See? They meant more to her, love-wise, than what she got from marriage.

Seems she was married to a nasty critter.

Or, like Orson Bean's story from his home town in Vermont. Where a man had just lost his wife after 50 years of marriage. And, as he was passing by, he noticed the man sitting on his porch in his rocking chair. Beside the empty one. And, he said "Sorry, for your loss." And, the man replied: "Why, I don't miss her much."; २३/२/१२, १०:१७ AM
Ann Althouse म्हणाले...: "You're just getting to this now? It's been around for at least a month."

You're right. It's old news.; २३/२/१२, १०:१७ AM
kjbe म्हणाले...: That's too bad, but knowing first hand (mom's side of the family)- the 'napoletani' are a fierce, proud, stubborn bunch.; २३/२/१२, १०:२२ AM
traditionalguy म्हणाले...: A man's honor is a stake here.

She can try a Bill Clinton spin that everybody does it...it's only sex.

But that defense is for men only. She is toast.; २३/२/१२, १०:२७ AM
Chip S. म्हणाले...: Presumably she didn't want to go to the grave with this lie on her conscience. So instead she's going to send him to his grave in misery and anger.

Selfish bitch.; २३/२/१२, १०:३५ AM
Mattman26 म्हणाले...: Hey, I think it's old joke time (aspirin-free):

Elderly couple walk into divorce lawyer's office; man says "We'd like to get divorced."

Divorce lawyer: How old are you?

Man: I'm 99, she's 96.

Lawyer: How long have you been married?

Man: 77 years.

Lawyer: My goodness, you've been together so long, why get divorced now?

Man: We were waiting for the children to die.; २३/२/१२, १०:४१ AM
kjbe म्हणाले...: If he wants to die in misery and anger over something that happened over 60 years ago, that's on him. She wasn't a saint, but I'll bet the farm he wasn't either.; २३/२/१२, १०:५६ AM
Alex म्हणाले...: How charming.; २३/२/१२, ११:०१ AM
Jim म्हणाले...: "See? They meant more to her, love-wise, than what she got from marriage.

Seems she was married to a nasty critter."

Right. It's a given that, being a woman, she can't be in the wrong. Obviously he was a scumbag.; २३/२/१२, ११:१९ AM
Matt Sablan म्हणाले...: "She wasn't a saint, but I'll bet the farm he wasn't either."

What if he was? Also -- the quote makes it look she was trying to keep it hidden still.

Also:

"The Italian press attributed the bitter break-up to the couple's southern roots."

I'd attribute it to adultery. But that's just me.; २३/२/१२, ११:१९ AM
The Crack Emcee म्हणाले...: Stupid bitch.

Loyalty - either you got it or you don't. What makes people think they can - or it's o.k. to - deceive people? Willingly convincing someone the world is other than as they perceive it is one of the cruelest acts one person can do to another - especially when they've given their all to you. Their very lives. That guy worked his entire life - probably putting his body on the line - for her.

Shit, the least she could've done is burned the letters.

I ultimately blame people like Kit, who have no standards, ethical or otherwise, and seem to think human relationships are some simple contractual affair, to be negotiated based on practicality. It's such a lack of ethics that explain why women kill their babies, people betray each other, and society appears not to hold. How can it? Anybody can do anything to anyone without consequences in his world. Hitler would've loved Kit.

Oh well, it's not as bad as me finding a duffel bag of cassette tapes.

Good luck, Old Man. You're better off without her, she's proven that. Can you imagine if this "love" of 40 years ago had turned out differently? That ho would've left your ass high-and-dry, with Kit's blessing, and tried to take you for half your shit.

Instead she merely used you for your entire fucking life.

Naw, that's not something any Real Man™ is gonna take to the grave.

Fuck that bitch.; २३/२/१२, ११:२४ AM
Rusty म्हणाले...: Serves her right, the slut.; २३/२/१२, ११:४७ AM
Alex म्हणाले...: Crack - it's a bit late for the guy to be having regrets. Besides I bet he got a good deal all these years with all the cooking, cleaning and keeping the home fires burning.; २३/२/१२, ११:५३ AM
Methadras म्हणाले...: Seriously, he's a dick. What kind of asshole in his late 90's does this? She's been there with him, she's been nearly loyal to him. Has given him children, he probably has great grandchildren. Dude, your life is almost over. Enjoy it you pretentious egotistical prick.; २३/२/१२, १२:१२ PM
Matt Sablan म्हणाले...: "Dude, your life is almost over. Enjoy it you pretentious egotistical prick."

And who knows how much of it has been a lie. He has been betrayed, quite literally, nearly every day of his life.

I'd probably be more forgiving, but I won't hold it against anyone who wouldn't be.; २३/२/१२, १२:१६ PM
BarrySanders20 म्हणाले...: Yep, it's the "B" word all right -betrayal. A breach of trust.

Origin:
1200–50; Middle English bitraien, equivalent to bi- be- + traien < Old French trair < Latin trādere to betray. See traitor

He's almost old enough to have used the word in its infancy, yet not wise enough to know when to forgive.; २३/२/१२, १२:३१ PM
The Crack Emcee म्हणाले...: Alex,

I bet he got a good deal all these years with all the cooking, cleaning and keeping the home fires burning.

How shallow. You're no better than Kit. Listen up: marriage ain't no "deal." Anyone can hire a maid, a chef, or a whore for what you're describing - but you don't open your bank account, share your deepest secrets and dreams, sacrifice, or have to introduce the family to any of them. The intertwining of two people over the long haul goes DEEP, man.

She's lucky he didn't kill her.

Methadras,

What kind of asshole in his late 90's does this? She's been there with him, she's been nearly loyal to him.

The kind who still has his nuts attached, and "nearly loyal" ain't loyalty.

Once it's gone, baby, good luck EVER looking at your spouse the same way again,...; २३/२/१२, २:३३ PM
Simon म्हणाले...: Ann Althouse said...
"It's old news."

Indeed—very old news. Decades old. The better headline is "world's oldest stroppy teenager discovered in Italy. He should grow up before it's too late, seek his wife's forgiveness, and get back to the noble pursuit of crossing the finish line together.; २३/२/१२, ३:१० PM
The Crack Emcee म्हणाले...: Simon,

He should grow up before it's too late, seek his wife's forgiveness, and get back to the noble pursuit of crossing the finish line together.

You obviously didn't get the memo:

Your wife may sleep around, his doesn't.

Let the bitches die alone.; २३/२/१२, ३:३७ PM
Freeman Hunt म्हणाले...: Pointless.

Give honor its due and muster some anger. Then forgive and go on.; २३/२/१२, ४:१७ PM
William म्हणाले...: All relationships end in betrayal, indifference, or abandonment. You just have to be patient and wait it out.; २३/२/१२, ५:०४ PM
dbp म्हणाले...: Rosa's bad deeds were long ago, but every day since then has been a lie too.

Perhaps it would be commendable to forgive his wife but I don't see how failing to be noble makes the guy a bastard. Certainly his failing is far less than that of his adulterous wife.

In any case, I am charmed by the old-world style of holding a grudge for a crime from 60 years past.; २३/२/१२, ५:१८ PM
Freeman Hunt म्हणाले...: ...every day since then has been a lie too.

How so? A whole life is defined by that bad act? What if, in those years, they grew closer and she more virtuous? It's sixty years. My own father's entire life did not span such a long time.

Certainly his failing is far less than that of his adulterous wife.

If it were sixty years ago, sure. Now? I disagree.

Honor and justice are virtuous, but so are forgiveness, mercy, and temperance.

I would guess, and admittedly I can only guess, that feelings of betrayal stem largely from imagining the other's mental life. "She's thinking of him." "She's remembering what she did with him." "She cares for him."

Does this woman so much as remember the man's name?; २३/२/१२, ५:४३ PM
अनामित म्हणाले...: ही टिप्पणी लेखकाना हलविली आहे.; २३/२/१२, ६:२४ PM
अनामित म्हणाले...: Sure she remembers his name. She *saved his letters*. Article states it was an affair.

I'm *surprised* he still had the energy to divorce her, but it is still the right decision. Sounds like she doesn't have the same energy.

My great aunt divorced her husband in her 70s for similar reasons. Good for her. A male relative in his 80s still goes wild with jealousy when his wife talks about her old boyfriend she almost married - no affair there. She had to google him in secret.

It's tempting to project into the future and think it doesn't matter when you're old but that's condescending in a way. All evidence I've seen points to it mattering just as much - you simply might get too tired to fight the insult, rather than "too wise and forgiving".; २३/२/१२, ६:३२ PM
Freeman Hunt म्हणाले...: I'm not assuming they shouldn't care because they're old. I'm imagining how differently I would react to a revelation like that about my husband if the betrayal had occurred a decade ago as opposed to being current. And in this man's case, it's six decades. Yow!; २३/२/१२, १०:४० PM