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१७ टिप्पण्या:
Gah. People are trying to eat breakfast, Ann.
I would have assumed that the activity is primarily a guy thing, but the note starts "Ladies:"
One comment is very instructive:
"Neither the toilet brush nor roomie’s back scrubber will mince the corn. Each kernel will need to be pushed through the drain grid with the handle of roomie’s toothbrush."
still not even awake, uncoffeed(!), this post title reveals the Glories of The Internet to me!
Passive aggressive. check.
Sullivan. check.
shower pooping. Got it!
Random bits from the Jan/Feb 09 issue of The Atlantic:
The End of White America? (cover)...
Inside front cover photo: White female Palinesque construction manager holds a phallic blueprint roll. She points emphatically towards a giant building under construction, giving orders to a smiling black man. Both figures are wearing hard hats and orange vests. This is a car ad. Toyota.
"I will finally get a programmable thermostat." Ad for Chevron.
At JPMorgan Chase, we are open for business. Ad
"Psychic Friends": "Hearing voices may not be as problematic as what the voices are saying." (short article)
"Faith Healing": "The diversity of religions in a given country correlates with the number of parasites." (short article)
Short articles about some shrine in Kandahar, New Urbanism in America, hard times in the porn biz, an Army cooking competition, the Basques.
"There's another language inside you. Give it a voice." Ad for Rosetta Stone.
Articles about the return of the cocktail, Panamanian ecotourism, geeks in goverment, Battlestar Galactica ("boasts a fierce corps of geeks").
The New York Times is dying.
White America may cease to exist in 2040.
Feature on Michelle Obama: We learn that she did not know whether Led Zeppelin was a man or a group, and that was one of the awkward things about being a young black woman at Princeton.
Feature on the guy who directs televised football games: "If you have a good shot, he uses it."
Profile of Chuck Schumer: "More than any other Democrat in Congress, Schumer is responsible for his party's gains..."
Stress solutions, Globaloney (America's influence will "be much diminished" and Obama had better help us accept that); Virginia Woolf and her maid; Toni Morrison's new novel ("Monotonous"); Obama is cool, says Christopher Hitchens; ads for Mardi Gras masks and berets and Athena Pheromones "Increase Affection."
I worked my way through college as a janitor in a department store.
One evening I got a call to go to the Junior Miss department right away.
When I got there I found that someone had taken a crap in one of the fitting rooms.
The salespeople stood there horrified as I put my hand in a little plastic shopping bag and simply picked it up.
I made sure everyone was watching and then I pretended to lick it for dramatic effect.
That turd was enormous but hard and very well-formed. It was very black and shiny which indicated upper GI bleeding, according to my physician brother-in-law.
Anyway, as I said before, it was huge.
No junior miss laid that stinky ole bad boy, no sir!
True story.
Now . . . what was that again about Andrew Sullivan?
Bissage,
Now Titus won't have anything to post about (boast about) this morning.
Prediction: it won't be long before a certain someone's Twitter log contains a post that resembles "someone pooped." Only it won't be just someone, it will be the magnificent diva herself!
For Andrew Sullivan, this was just one more item for the list of Why Women are Really Really Icky.
"Dude!"
The comment I set out above, that being a remembrance of turds past, and my reference to “Fellini Satyricon”, set forth here, has caused me to consult my own personal Ziggy Archive™ to find a single-panel cartoon by the late, great Charles Rodrigues.
Ah yes, here it is:
A janitor is holding a wet mop and about to clean out a filthy, nasty stall in a public men’s room. He’s had enough of it and he loses his temper and he waves his fist in the air and he shouts out loud: “Goddamn hermaphrodites! Come in here, piss all over the seats, and then throw your dirty tampons all over the floor!”
To those of us who have been there, that’s a side-splitter.
This thread won't be offically commented on until Titus weighs in on it. He has all the proper qualifications to properly render judgement I think...
Why is beagle boy so surprised when he has been the turd in the punchbowl for the past few years.
We've all been "particularly struck" by Andrew Sullivan's poop for years. In fact I'd like to particularly strike Andrew Sullivan with some poop of my own.
Anyway, as I said before, it was huge.
No junior miss laid that stinky ole bad boy, no sir!
Another reason to keep "fat chicks" off a jury?
When I was in the 2nd grade I rode the bus to and from school everyday. One afternoon as bus driver Willie put on the brakes to stop before a railroad crossing a baseball-sized turd rolled down the isle towards the front of the bus. Willie pulled the bus over to the side of the road and with a snarl demanded to know who did it. No one fessed up so we never found out. We think it was Amanda but no one could ever prove it. Besides, she was wearing tights that day.
There was a serial elevator-pooper in one of the guys' dorms at my college.
Andrew Sullivan?
I don't get it: Can someone - anyone - explain to me how he's still working?
टिप्पणी पोस्ट करा