६ नोव्हेंबर, २००६

"Naked man arrested for concealed weapon."

That happened.

१८ टिप्पण्या:

अनामित म्हणाले...

With that headline I figured, we had a Germany or Florida? situation.

But to my disappointment (or maybe delight?) it was a homegrown story from right here in Southern California.

Woohoo!

(and ouch)

AllenS म्हणाले...

"The man was lying on a tree stump, masturbating beside a nature path"

I think he may have some issues.

Unknown म्हणाले...

Rectum? Damned near killed him!

Palladian म्हणाले...

If you're goin' to San Francisco,

Be sure to insert an awl in your rectum,

If you're goin' to San Francisco,

You're gonna meet some scary people there.

For those who come to San Francisco,

Summertime will be a love-in there;

In the parks of San Francisco,

Gentle people with awls inserted into their rectums.

Unknown म्हणाले...

You know, if this starts happening more often, I think we're going to have to start training our police officers with one of these. (Hat tip Dave Barry)

Palladian म्हणाले...

This guy fits awls well in ends well.

Palladian म्हणाले...

From Mcg's link:

"1 Adult lumbar torso (unisex)

4 rectal units
1 prostate model
1 endocervix model
1 jar of Vaseline
1 storage box

Specifications may change without notice. "

To quote Slim Pickens in "Dr Strangelove": "Shoot, a fella could have a pretty good weekend in Vegas with all that stuff!"

Unknown म्हणाले...

"Where is the weirdest place that you have had the urge to put an awl?"
"That would be in the butt, Bob."

Doug म्हणाले...

Rectum? Damned near killed him!

Damn you, I got done reading that story and was ready to post that, LOL, but you beat me to it.

Sanjay म्हणाले...

Aw, fer cryin' out loud, that nature trail runs by my duaghter's preschool -- he can't be five minutes' walk up it.

Sorry, xwl --- NOT Southern Cal!

BJK म्हणाले...

I'll be the one to ask:

Does self gratification while simultaneously consealing a tool in one's rectum qualify as a one-man threesome?

AllenS म्हणाले...

"Does self gratification while simultaneously consealing a tool in one's rectum qualify as a one-man threesome?"

Depends on where the other hand was.

Ruth Anne Adams म्हणाले...

I'm stumped about this one awl-right.

Maybe he was trying to stab a gerbil?

अनामित म्हणाले...

My mistake, I saw that it said El Cerrito, and even mentions that the incident happened near a Bay Area Rapid Transit station, but my mind read it as Cerritos.

Oops.

Append the above post to read that it was a homegrown story from right here in California.

(Southern, Northern or Central, we're all citizens (OK, many of us aren't citizens, residents anyway) of the Golden State)

KCFleming म्हणाले...

Next time?

1. Tool belt
2. A seat cushion
3. A room

thefewandtheplenty म्हणाले...

I'm pretty sure there's an Onion article that predates this.

But I admire the police for sticking to procedure by asking a naked man if we was carrying anything. We have procedures for a reason people!

Revenant म्हणाले...

If this guy had just had the presence of mind to turn himself blue or invent his own private gold-backed currency he'd have had a lock on the 2008 Libertarian congressional nomination.

knox म्हणाले...

When you're talking about an awl or an ice pick and you're dealing with somebody who's fresh out of prison, it's a weapon.

I'd also argue that when some guy's pulling it out of his rectum, it's a weapon. Keep your distance, indeed!