"He's a total dork talking to these hypomasculine influencers... He makes them all look like idiots, and he's not even doing much...."

"There's something about 'the Louis touch' that makes it compelling. It's kind of how dorky John Wilson can make a documentary about scaffolding in New York City and I'm riveted...."

So said a TikTokker I love — Touré — and because I am John Wilson's biggest fan (I think), I watched the Netflix documentary "Louis Theroux: Inside the Manosphere":

With the comparison to John Wilson, I went into this Netflix experience with really high hopes, and these were not met. But it's not as if Theroux and Netflix had promised to be like John Wilson. Compared to John Wilson, Theroux is ferocious and macho. And Wilson doesn't go after people to take them down. He seems ready to love anybody and seems mostly to want to open up quirky new paths and to whimsically pursue them. By contrast, Theroux has locked onto some people he loathes and intends to take down. He's using a standard journalistic technique of seeming low-key and neutral. He's lying in wait. That's how you lie in wait. Now, that can be good, but I came away from the documentary disappointed.

So I went looking for some writing that would help me explore my disappointment. I chose "Louis Theroux’s Pointless Manosphere Documentary" by River Page in The Free Press.

"Walking hand in hand with the one I love/Ooh, how I love the rainy days."

Neil and his Grandson sing. You can tell Neil is so proud of him! Looks like it they enjoyed it! pic.twitter.com/ur4rvKe7iN

— Johnny Midnight ⚡️ (@its_The_Dr) March 3, 2026

At the time of his death (last week), Neil Sedaka was still married to that grandson's grandmother. They'd been married for 64 years. I thought Neil Sedaka was gay, but I see that he was one of those heterosexual men who seem gay to a lot of people. I think it's good for heterosexual men to see that it's fine to be... whatever it was that made people think Neil Sedaka was a gay man. 

Lovely grandparenting! 

"Perhaps you’ve noticed.... Amid all the cars that are parked headfirst, a seemingly increasing number have instead been backed in."

"These dissenters face out, like getaway drivers in a bank robbery ready to make a clean escape. Some people, myself included, find the move annoying. William Van Tassel, the manager of driver training programs for AAA... said that perhaps it was because they were following AAA’s updated guidelines.... My own theory is that reversing into a space is a response to the ambient anxiety in our society, akin to privately noting the exits in a movie theater. In a nation of rampant gun violence, backing in so you can quickly get out provides a sense of security.... [Van Tassel] cited a 2020 study from the journal Transportation Research that found, among other things, that the pull-in, back-out maneuver had a higher crash risk. Since pedestrians are most likely to be found walking in the major lanes, not in a parking space, it’s safer to back into the area with fewer people.... But I can’t bring myself to join in, and I don’t fully accept the safety argument. Since 2018, new vehicles sold in the United States have been federally mandated to have backup cameras, which can assist in reversing out of a spot without plowing into someone...."

I'm reading "Do You Back Into a Parking Spot or Back Out? An exploration of what’s driving a change in America’s parking lots" (NYT).

Those who do back up — is it for safety? Do other people believe it's for safety? As the male author of the NYT article says: "My wife suspects they’re mostly men showing off." Ha ha. That's what I think too. And by the way, I've always been quick to suspect that people are just showing off. I was much worse about that when I was much younger. I can honestly say that when NASA put a man on the moon in 1969, I thought they were showing off. I looked away! The moon landing was a very big thing; backing into a parking space is a very little thing. In things big and small, I am ready to disrespect the achievement as a matter of showing off. A lateral thinker will therefore ask: What's bad about showing off? Where would we be without it?

"Well well well, if it isn’t gender-affirming care for straight folks."

That's the top-rated comment on the NYT article "'I’d Like to Be Normal': Can Height Surgery Make Them Happy? Limb-lengthening can add inches to a person’s stature. But its risks have made it controversial."

"There's ideas where I'll start it off and it's just like this ain't going anywhere... and then I'll find a whole other angle.... like what if I was a woman..."

"... and I was watching this and I'm looking at this fucking meathead on stage and I'm like okay, like, I got to figure out a way to get them to understand that just cuz I look like this doesn't mean I'm a bad guy. Like like let me like work this into your head first and then explain it from my perspective.... It's an automatic assumption.... it's an untold prejudice that, like, men with muscles in particular are assholes... a mean person...."

Joe Rogan, explaining his comedy-writing methodology and reflecting on life in this gendered world.

 

Elsewhere in the conversation — at  15:12 — describes a confrontation with 2 women: "I was at a Starbucks the other day and two lesbians walked in. They saw me and they left.... They said, 'We can't, we can't do this.' And they looked in my face and they said, 'We can't do this,' and they left."

"There is an easy familiarity between the two men that allows Bannon to call Epstein a 'schmuck' and 'criminal' and even ask if he is 'the devil' fallen from paradise."

"At one point, Bannon comments: 'There’s something deeply fucked up with you.' The interview also becomes an exercise in intellectual peacocking as they invoke Socrates, Isaac Newton and quantum physics but pay little attention to Epstein’s crimes. Epstein reveals himself to be a living museum of racial prejudice...."

From "'Do you think you’re the devil himself?': highlights from the bizarre, newly released Bannon-Epstein interview/The interview,⁠ revealed in the latest tranche of Epstein files, was reportedly intended for a sympathetic documentary" (The Guardian).

Sample clip, with Epstein posing as thoughtful on the topic of gender difference:

Transcript:

Science doesn't describe romance. I don't know why I'm attracted to somebody. I don't know. People are attracted to each other, and everyone has felt the same thing at some point. They've seen someone walk into a room and thought, "Oh, that person gives me a creepy feeling."

He knows, I infer, that the females he is finding attractive are experiencing him as creepy.

"I've got nothing but respect for Don Lemon's husband."

"Do you see that man's face?"

"Big Time, Strong, Glamorous, and Exciting."

What do you want from football?

I'm reading Trump, complaining about football, at Truth Social: "I can’t watch the new NFL Kickoff. Like many others, I just turn my head. Who has the right to make such a change? So disparaging to the game! The original was Big Time, Strong, Glamorous, and Exciting. The ridiculous new Kickoff Rule takes away the prestige and power of the game. I hope College Football doesn’t follow suit!"

Glamorous.... the most powerful man in the world cries out for the old-time macho brutal collision of giant male bodies and what he's missing is the glamor.

I'm looking up "glamorous," and I like, for Trump's use of the word, the OED's second definition: "Attractive or appealing in an exciting way, esp. because out of the ordinary or suggestive of a more colourful or thrilling way of life." One of the sample quotes is from the 1960 novel, "The Custard Boys": "The cinema, the newspapers and the war books conditioned us to look upon war as glamorous and exciting."

Perhaps somewhere in Trump's fervid mind there's the notion that MAGA really means "Make America Glamorous Again."

"Brendan Liaw was kind of joking when he agreed he was a professional stay-at-home son during his appearance on 'Jeopardy!' in May...."

"'I figured, why not have some fun with it?' he said. 'Better to be a "stay-at-home son" than "unemployed" or "schmuck" or "lazy guy."' He certainly wasn’t expecting to set off a media moment of stories and think pieces on so-called 'trad sons' — adult men who embrace the lifestyle of living with their parents."

From "Stay-at-home sons are here — and they’re not going anywhere Why some young men are finding happiness in their parents’ homes" (WaPo)(gift link).

"'I’m sort of the origin of all this discourse,' [Brendan] Liaw, 28, said. He was speaking from an apartment in Vancouver, British Columbia.... After his 'Jeopardy!' appearance — during which he won almost $60,000 across four games — several media outlets, including Vanity Fair, People and the Wall Street Journal published stories about a rise in 'trad sons' or 'hub-sons.'"

"Tech entrepreneur Bryan Johnson — he of the 'don’t die' motto — is particularly obsessed with the ways his penis might help him live forever."

"The data Johnson collects on his johnson includes ejaculate volume (just over a half teaspoon, apparently double the norm), sperm count and motility, and nighttime erection quality, which he then compares with his teenage son. His regimen to keep his penis in tip-top shape includes shockwave therapy and Botox injections. He’s not alone. Dave Asprey, the self-proclaimed father of the biohacking movement and the founder of Bulletproof Coffee, plans to live to 180. He treats his penis to injections of stem cells and acoustic wave therapy. For the latter, he helpfully suggests a DIY version: 'Grab the cock and slap it against your leg on the left 67 times,' he said on his podcast, The Human Upgrade. 'And then on the right… And you lightly slap the balls…The shock waves stimulate the cells. All of those are good for testosterone and good for enhancing what’s called male energy.'"

From "Longevity Science’s Penis Fixation Has an Extensive, Strange History/Biohackers like Bryan Johnson and Dave Asprey can’t stop talking about their genitalia—and neither could these 20th-century pseudoscientists" (Vanity Fair).

"They’re trying to turn it into something scary, something sinister. But folks, it’s not really about anything that’s all that complicated."

"At its core, it’s about giving every American an opportunity to be treated with the basic decency, dignity and respect they all deserve."

Said ex-President Joe Biden, about transgender rights, quoted in "Biden Slams Republicans for Using L.G.B.T.Q. Identity as ‘Political Football’/The former president defended his support for transgender rights, a stance that has provoked second-guessing among some Democrats" (NYT).

So it's all very simple and anyone who says otherwise is sinister, and to boil it down to that isn't politicizing anything. It's the other side that's doing the politicizing, those bad people over there. 

I remember when Democrats liked to portray themselves as sophisticated, seeing all the complexity and nuance. Now, they're pushing the idea it's all quite simple. It's black and white. So... binary.

The top-rated comment over there is interesting. Jose writes:

Melanie Hamlett has a word to say about Scott Galloway.

You know Scott Galloway — he has a new book, he was on Bill Maher's show, I blogged about him back in '23 after he talked about men "garnering the skills and strength."

Melanie Hamlett was new to me but I see she's written lots of mainstream media articles, including "Men Have No Friends and Women Bear the Burden/Toxic masculinity—and the persistent idea that feelings are a 'female thing'—has left a generation of straight men stranded on emotionally-stunted island, unable to forge intimate relationships with other men. It's women who are paying the price" (Harper's Bazaar 2019).

Before I read any of that I decided based on this one TikTok that she is a comic genius:

"So anyway, there are a number of you folks in what I would call the manosphere who are reaching some conclusions that I wonder if they're not going to be, um, more harmful than they are insightful...."

Says Bret Weinstein to Ben Davidson, in a podcast titled "Son Set in the Manosphere."

Weinstein has a lot of things he wants to say, and he takes the time spell them out calmly. Davidson is way more emotional — embarrassingly angry at women — to the point where I felt that he shouldn't be on the show at all, but he did give Weinstein a lot to bounce off from. 

"Across the country, the ancient tradition of Orthodox Christianity is attracting energetic new adherents, especially among conservative young men."

"They are drawn to what they describe as a more demanding, even difficult, practice of Christianity. Echoing some of the rhetoric of the so-called manosphere, new waves of young converts say Orthodoxy offers them hard truths and affirms their masculinity.... Many of the young Americans new to the pews have been introduced to Orthodoxy by hard-edge influencers on YouTube and other social media platforms.... Orthodoxy 'appeals to the masculine soul,' said Josh Elkins, a student at North Carolina State University who was chatting with other young men.'The Orthodox Church is the only church that really coaches men hard, and says, "This is what you need to do,"' said Mr. Elkins, 20.... Some converts report approvingly that Orthodoxy has a more masculine feel than other traditions. Priests, who must be male and can marry, often have large beards and big families. Orthodoxy asks practitioners to make sacrifices like fasting, rather than offering them emotional contemporary music and therapeutic sermons, which critics describe as the typical evangelical megachurch experience...."

From "Orthodox Church Pews Are Overflowing With Converts/'In the whole history of the Orthodox Church in America, this has never been seen,' a priest said about the surge of young men drawn to the demanding practice of Christianity'" (NYT)(gift link, because there's much more to the article, many photographs, and a torrent of negativity in the comments section).

Typical comments over there: "Wearing gilded robes and kissing gilded books is masculine? Having an imaginary friend that you follow rules for is masculine? These guys are desperate for meaning and will bend over backwards and forwards for it. Anything but actual self reflection and growth." And: "What a sad spectacle. Real Orthodoxy is rooted in actual cultures, like Serbia or Georgia or Armenia, and for good or bad you can find an authentic culture there. What this article describes is a ridiculous Youtube phenomenon."

"Get out, drink more, and make a series of bad decisions that might pay off."

Earlier in that "Real Time" interview, not on that clip, Scott Galloway said, "We've unwittingly built an economy dependent on our ability to evolve a new species of asocial, asexual men. And what you have is Big Tech is trying to sequester people — especially young people, especially young men — from the most important thing in their life and that is relationships."

AND: Here's the "Overtime" part. Galloway brings out beers for the boys:

This topic reminds me of some thing I've quoted before — from Paul Johnson's "Intellectuals" — about the playwright Henrik Ibsen:

"Now, however, the new facial hair renaissance seems intrinsically connected to the current discourse around masculinity and the manosphere."

"There is little, after all, more redolent of manliness than facial hair, the visual expression of testosterone. It’s no accident that JD Vance is not the only member of Team Trump to have a beard. So do Donald Trump Jr., Commerce Secretary (and tariff warrior) Howard Lutnick and Senator Ted Cruz. In other words, beards are once again mainstream, which suggests their meaning is changing once again. Or even dissipating. As my colleague Jacob Gallagher... said, the scruffy look 'loses that masculine oomph when every guy seems to be doing the same thing.'"

Writes the NYT fashion critic Vanessa Friedman, in "What’s With All the Beards? More and more men seem to be putting down the razor and letting their whiskers grow. Our critic examines the history of the trend and what it might mean."

Is there anything less masculine than the phrase "masculine oomph"? Looking for "masculine oomph"? You can't get there from here.

As for "the current discourse around masculinity and the manosphere," what is most current is the idea of emulating Charlie Kirk. He was quite clean-shaven, so you may want to rethink your effort to right-wing-ize beards.

"The New Dream Guy Is Beefy, Placid and … Politically Ambiguous/Amid pitched debates about masculinity, the 'himbo' stands stoically above it all."

What??!

That's a headline in the NYT for a piece by Casey Michael Henry (a writer who's got a novel called "Not Recommended").

Excerpt: "Calls have proliferated for a left-wing parallel to Joe Rogan.... Consider, for instance, Zohran Mamdani’s surprise win in the New York City mayoral primary, which came with the strong support of the young male vote. A key part of Mamdani’s strategy was finding vessels for an uncomplicated message about affordability, including a few men who could be described, and who might describe themselves, as 'himbos.' The candidate was endorsed by Hasan Piker, the leftist pinup, marathon livestreamer and co-founder of a clothing line called Himbo Fitness. Joshua Citarella, a bodybuilding enthusiast and the host of the left-wing show 'Doomscroll,' facilitated a fund-raising panel. The comedian Stavros Halkias, a heterodox Bernie Bro who could be called a 'himbo' of a more freewheeling, bacchanalian variety, filmed an Instagram endorsement. There were times when Mamdani’s praetorian guard of male influencers looked like an Ultimate Fighting Championship undercard or at least the set of 'The Man Show.'"

Here's what the more freewheeling, bacchanalian himbo looks like:

"How many Americans even know what color the ribbon is for prostate-cancer awareness?"

From "What Does It Take to Get Men to See a Doctor? Men in the U.S. live six fewer years than women. One clinic is trying to persuade men that getting checked out could save their life" (NYT).

Toxic masculinity” has become a catchall term.... But when researchers first began using the term, they meant something narrower and more specific: a culturally endorsed yet harmful set of masculine behaviors characterized by rigid, traditional male traits, such as dominance, aggression and sexual promiscuity. Men trapped in this man box, as it is sometimes called, are less likely to seek medical care and are more likely to engage in risky behaviors detrimental to their health, such as binge drinking or drug use.... Even seemingly positive attributes associated with traditional masculinity, such as providing for one’s family... can have negative health consequences. They may put work ahead of addressing medical concerns.... Or they may take on dangerous jobs or work extreme hours. But why do some men hold so tightly to these cultural notions about masculinity that lead them toward worse health? The answer may be traced to how fragile manhood itself can feel.... 

"A guy is a man who is loyal to something, even if his loyalty is..mistaken..."

"Bishop Sheen..is not against Bad Guys. He is only against their badness: he is for their guyness... He is only a guy like the rest of us."

That's from 1953 in the Catholic Times, the oldest appearance in print of the word "guyness," according to the OED, which defines "guyness" as "The quality, state, or condition of being a man, esp. with (typically humorous) reference to male stereotypical characteristics or interests, such as being uncomplicated, good-natured, uncomfortable with emotional issues, preoccupied with sport, gadgets, beer, etc."

There's also an obsolete version of "guyness," from back in the 1800s, that meant "The quality or fact of having an odd or grotesque appearance." That's less odd than it might seem: the original lowercase "guy" was an effigy of Guy Fawkes. 

Just what I need, the founder of the Office of Applied Strategy mansplains going meta on performative maleness.

I'm seeing this in the NYT: "How Do You Spot a ‘Performative’ Male? Look for a Tote Bag. As a new archetype gains traction, contests in Seattle and New York have found some men embracing the label — and signifiers like books, records and Labubus."

I'm thinking didn't I just blog that, but it's dated today, so no, I did not. Six days ago, I blogged "Forget The Lonely Men Epidemic—The Performative Male Era Is Here, And We Need To Talk (And Run)/He knows his moon sign, wears thrifted clothes, and posts aesthetic carousels with captions about healing and self-love," which I found — in Elle India — because I'd googled "performative male." We were told, "he comes armed with wired headphones, tote bags, vintage clothes, matcha lattes, Spotify playlists ft. Clairo or Laufey, and Sally Rooney books."

And here's the NYT, replete with an illustration that includes — of all things — a Sally Rooney book. It felt too drain-circling to blog, but then I got to this, and I knew it was bloggable: