Said Ashlee Piper, author of "No New Things," quoted in "How I Quit Shopping" (NY Magazine).
Skills!
२५ एप्रिल, २०२५
"One guy told me that every time he wants to buy something, he does 25 push-ups — he says it takes him out of his head and back into his body."
"And, hey, I’m not going to do that, but... [d]oing something physical, like putting on a song or getting yourself a snack or going to get a coffee, that’s all good. Text a friend or call someone. A lot of people have told me that they find their partner and have sex or get out the vibrator — which you can’t do at work, obviously, but if you’re at home, get after it. Whatever works. These are skills that you build over time...."
पोस्ट्स
४५ टिप्पण्या:
"Ms. Piper? There is a Jeffrey Toobin for you on line 3"
"Whatever works. These are skills that you build over time....""
As Led Zepplin sings: "The dopamine remains the same."
A lot of people have told me that they find their partner and have sex or get out the vibrator — which you can’t do at work, obviously ...
You'd be surprised, Piper.
These are the End of Days.
Increasing load, distance, capital costs, etc, attenuates undesirable behaviors, wicked solutions, etc. Personal responsibility, accountability, and moderation are a moral alternative.
Ethical training wheels on a progressive path are suitable for young children, immature adults, criminal actors, and new pets.
I wonder what else that guy does. When he really wants sex, does he do chin-ups? When he wants to work out, does he reach for his vibrator?
Having a cup of coffee would only make me want to shop more, especially if the coffee wasn't decaffeinated. There's a ritual aspect to it. Have a coffee, have a drink, have a smoke, have a wank, and you're suited up and ready to face the world.
I’m skeptical about advising youth that opting for sex is better than going shopping.
However, if a young lady opts for sex with Elon, she might get plenty of money to go shopping, and a child.
Getting something to eat or drink does involve buying. Push-ups or sex do not. And they are more true to the technique of shifting your focus away from desire and connecting with your body.
My first job after college paid a modest salary in San Francisco, yet my wife and I managed to save enough in our first year of marriage to buy our first house. A co-worker asked how such a thing was possible, and in the course of our conversation I discovered she and her husband carried something in excess of $100,000 in credit card debt (unadjusted for inflation!) while we carried none. My advice to her and everyone else who’s asked since is entirely compatible with this post: Develop the skill of eating at home and not buying new shit.
I dunno, maybe you could try working at work instead of shopping? Still I agree with Lazarus. I think you could probably get away with sex or using the vibrator at work if you put your mind to it. Ask Jeffrey Toobin.
Skills!
Reminds me of the time when I got into a discussion with someone online about whether being a Starbucks barista counted as a "skilled" job. She said it did because it took training and practice to make the milk design in the coffee flavored drink.
I said that anything that took less than a week to learn with OJT was unskilled.
John Henry
I don't "shop". I hate the entire concept of "shopping", which I equate with wandering aimlessly looking for things to buy.
I do buy things that will make my life better. Today I searched for and bought a sprinkler that I think will do a better job watering the garden than the one I currently own. Is that "shopping"?
My sons and I had a deal that any time anyone used a swear word we all had to do 20 pushups. We all got VERY good at doing pushups. We were doing taikwondo at the time so many hundreds of pushups per day were part of our training as well. Some days we would do 7 or 8 hundred a day. "This is bullshit dad!" 20 more pushups...
Every time I think of buying something I recall my wife's tone of voice when reviewing monthly bills. Works for me. Would work for anyone experiencing it.
So that's what that guy was doing in Target on Tuesday!
"I don't "shop". I hate the entire concept of "shopping", which I equate with wandering aimlessly looking for things to buy.
I do buy things that will make my life better. Today I searched for and bought a sprinkler that I think will do a better job watering the garden than the one I currently own. Is that "shopping"?"
There are people for whom the pleasure comes from perusing items and then spending money on them, and not from the items themselves. It is kinda one step from becoming a hoarder.
Particular, peculiar obsessions are evidence of missing the forest for the trees, the woman for the sex, health for HealthCare, diversity for Diversity, etc.
" ... "shopping", which I equate with wandering aimlessly looking for things to buy"
That is what shopping is. I can even force myself to shop. If I realize I need something, I find it on line and order it, but that's not really "shopping," the emotional activity and time suck.
Strange. Aren't most people's shopping urges constrained by not having the money to indulge them? Works for me.
That's why I was such an awful target for salespeople for so many years: "You can pitch all you want. I'm not buying cause I can't afford it."
I once told a car salesman what I could afford. He kept at me all afternoon. When I eventually left without buying, he said "I wish you'd have been more honest and not wasted my time."
He thought I was lying about what I could afford. He thought I was lying like he was.
Psychology bit from the article: "[Dopamine is] released in anticipation of getting the thing you want. It makes us desire things, and shopping stokes it intensely. It’s why people feel such heightened euphoria when they’re in the browsing and almost-buying process and then there’s a letdown after we’ve bought the item: You forget about it, or it loses the desirability it had before you owned it. The thrill is gone. Knowing what’s happening in your body when you’re shopping and then finding activities that are non–shopping-related that give you a similar thrill and comfort and joy — what is that for you?"
It’s called distraction. Works for dogs, kids, and spouses.
My wife was a Gallagherian shopper for many years. Strolling from department to department, aisle to aisle, with that shopper's grin . . . "I'm shopping, I'm shopping" in the thought bubble above her head.
My style has always been wham-bam thank-you-mam blitzing, in and out in ten minutes, looking neither to the left nor to the right.
Now she rarely leaves the house, and shops online (without buying anything, usually, so there is that).
With high value purchases, I consider the capital punishment, and evaluate my priorities before making a choice. Clutter is a moderating factor that mitigates progress (e.g. body fat, Healthcare, "benefits").
I was a Poor Starving College Student for years (grad school) and if I wanted to buy something that cost more than about $25 I'd wait 24 hours. I'll even do that today for most things. Both my parents grew up poor (not destitute, but definitely lower class) and knew the value of a dollar.
Must buy the book
A few calories, a few minutes, twenty-five push-ups are nothing. Do a hundred, a thousand. Times up.
It's funny to watch dumbass far left fad publications like NYMag (who let us not forget, STILL thinks Jackie Coakley was raped) think they are inventing the wheel, when they have have at the same time been attacking more sensible minds who have been saying the EXACT SAME THING.
Dave Ramsey has been preaching this for 20+ years. But because because he says "god" alot and the NYMag has been busy promoting casual hookups, transurrectionists and pedophiles, it must have passed over their blue-haired heads.
The tariffs should help.
"Clutter is a moderating factor "
I don't think "can we afford it" (because we can), but "where will put it".
"where will WE put it."
(I hate that I can't delete comments anymore.)
But what if she wanted to buy a new vibrator?
So that's the guy I saw in the Target parking lot.
"Get out your vibrator, which you can’t do at work, obviously ..."
Well, not with that defeatist attitude you can't.
I'm just happy that NY Magazine is attacking its advertisers here with this. Should hasten their demise.
When I have the shopping urge, I go to the charity thrift store with a budget.
It's the same addictive behavior as people have for alcohol, smoking, drugs. Saying just don't do it or you can't afford it are just as ineffective. Some people buy tons of stuff online but just stack it up at home. Never open the boxes. And they will find the money or rack up huge debts.
There's a slogan in AA "move a muscle, change a thought" it is used to distract someone from picking up a drink.
YouTube: The Headless Way: A Simple Trick to Realize You’re Not in the World
This guy is not easy to listen to, but I'm interested in the topic. He doesn't have ear dye.
Electric shocks work too.
Is Ashlee Piper the maiden name of Mrs. Jeffrey toobin? But yeah, don't go shopping or pay attention during that dumb meeting, just whip it out and go to town!
Whats astounding about Toobin and dick is his co-workers weren't even fazed by it. And he's back on the air as an X-burt. An authority figure. But that's liberal/leftists for you. Everything is forgiven - except not following the party line.
When I get the urge to do pushups I beat off instead, but I never get the urge to do pushups.
Sorry I wrote can even when I meant can’t even. I was trying to say I can’t even force myself to shop.
RCOCEAN II, you miss the point of Toobin's example. He is an ever better X-burt and authority figure, because he is now absolutely guaranteed to follow the party line, after his compromising behavior.
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