August 22, 2022

"The propaganda wing of Big Vacation tells everyone that vacations are these reinvigorating and reforming respites."

"They’re where Stella got her groove back. Where you can find Parts Unknown. Where you’re supposed to eat, pray and love until you finally forget Sarah Marshall. Unfortunately, I have not enjoyed them the way I’ve been told they should be enjoyed. I usually have a good time, but I’ve had a good time at Arby’s.... I’ve grappled with this vacation angst for years, questioning why they just never felt great to me, and wondering if a combination of writer person brain worms and PTBD (post-traumatic brokeness disorder) made me unable to truly appreciate them."

Writes Damon Young in "Everyone’s vacationing wrong" (WaPo).

I misread "post-traumatic brokeness disorder" as post-traumatic brokenness disorder. It's a reference to having been broke, not broken, and I see Young wrote an op-ed 4 years ago called "I Have Post-Brokeness Stress Disorder." I spent time thinking about an imagined disorder no one was talking about.

Anyway... I too have "grappled with... vacation angst for years," though it's a long time since money had anything to do with it. But I really identified with the suggestion that the problem is something that lies under Young's term "writer person brain worms." He doesn't explain that. His topic becomes the way a vacation is work — a different kind of work than work work. Vacation work has to do with tight scheduling and pressure to do a lot of things. 

But I feel like I know what he means by writer person brain worms. If you are the writer kind of person and you expose yourself to new stimuli, you get lots of ideas, you analyze and critique, you notice discrepancies and failures. You peer into the cracks between the idealization of the place and the reality. You wonder whether other tourists — travelers? — are experiencing the idealization or slipping into the reality like you... if you indeed even are... and who are you to cast aspersions on them... and what is reality anyway? Someplace you'd like to travel to

27 comments:

n.n said...

The art, science, and publication of relativity.

RideSpaceMountain said...

I sort of agree with this. Far too many people are taking vacations that aren't vacations at all. I learned this recently while traveling with a new-born. A real vacation should be about having fun, almost effortlessly, and the more effortless fun you can have by diverting as much work on to someone else as possible the more refreshed you will be when you come back.

Lots of people are working too hard to vacation on their vacation. The amount of effort expended to get to the point where you have a good time ruins the good time. When you're younger you get a much higher ROI taking a chance by going exploring, but that falls way way off when you actually need the ROI of having guaranteed fun otherwise you'll be back in the office on Monday feeling like you never left.

You begin to understand why you see a lot of people just fishing and drinking beer. Super effortless, guaranteed ROI, even if the ROI is low to moderate for lots of people. You have to compromise to have a guaranteed good time. It's the mature thing to do...and I never thought I'd hear myself say that.

Carol said...

Whenever I travel to a new place I want to (1) move there but (2)also go back home asap.

Anyway, looking into getting a Real ID license in case I want to get a passport and what a pain the the ass! Certified copies of everything!

It seems downright unconstitutional.

Ampersand said...

I am so deeply shallow that I love my vacations. I just throw myself into the differentness of travel and destination, and the ever present hope for unanticipated events. I feel fortunate to be me.

gilbar said...

if your vacations are work; you're doing them wrong!
Schedules and timetables are the enemy of vacations
Don't worry about WHEN the "right time" to fish is.. The Best time to fish, is Right NOW!

Rollo said...

I suppose the point of vacation is that when it's over, you want to get back to work. Whether you are really revitalized and reenergized is beside the point. Probably you are so fed up with vacationing that work seems like a real vacation.

Mikey NTH said...

Vacation angst? I go where I want on vacation. Sometimes that means staying home.

Your time, do with it as you will.

Sebastian said...

"the way I’ve been told they should be enjoyed"

Told by whom? Who the hell pays any attention to what they've "been told"? It's just a phony premise for a writer person writing thingy.

"I too have "grappled with... vacation angst for years""

Angst, as in, making up reasons for not wanting to travel?

"Vacation work has to do with tight scheduling and pressure to do a lot of things."

Says who? Pressure from whom?

"If you are the writer kind of person and you expose yourself to new stimuli, you get lots of ideas"

So? Is that bad? Isn't that what writer persons who actual want to write things should want?

re Pete said...

I can relax when I go back to work has always been my vacation plan

Mike said...

I dunno. Vacay is a way to be hiding Biden. And that's a good thing. Not only for the Dims--but for the country as well.

Dave Begley said...

“ Anyway... I too have "grappled with... vacation angst for years,"

All your angst will disappear when Althouse and Meade visit Nebraska!

Ice Nine said...

>I’ve grappled with this vacation angst for years, questioning why they just never felt great to me<

Lighten up, pal.

Will Cate said...

For someone who is ostensibly addressing "everyone" he sure is telling us a lot about himself.

Will Cate said...

For someone who is ostensibly addressing "everyone" he sure is telling us a lot about himself.

stephen cooper said...

Slightly Off Topic, but still related to 'vacations' : I think it was on this blog that, years ago, I learned that a rich kid with professor parents who wanted to be a writer took a cruise (on a cruise line that advertised to everyone but of course hoped only those who could pay a few thousand bucks a week would show up) and on that cruise the rich kid, with the thought of impressing his rich professor parents and others, devised a scheme where he would pretend to be a good friend to an "average middle class couple" and he did, in fact, spend many happy hours with them, talking and being friendly and joshing around: and when the cruise was over, he wrote an essay for a rich kid academia adjacent magazine (by that I mean a magazine that appealed to his ilk, rich kids with parents in academia, with a comfortable life - I think it was the Atlantic or Vanity Fair) in which he, no holds barred, mocked those people as much as he could, to show that he was a competent, even maybe a great writer, who knew how, as all good liberals know, to make fun of people who work for a living.
Anyway, I learned that here.
My friends, if you have children who are interested in one day being an artist, tell them that if they EVER viciously betray a friend in order to seem like a better artist, tell them that you will never speak to them, or of them, again.

Howard said...

A vacation should be purpose driven: Culture geography and physical exertion. Instead of kitsch consumption, engorgement and stimulation.

Sprezzatura said...

Why not have a vacation in the garage (or safely parked outside)?

I.e.. buy a fun car. Then you can have a thirty minute vacation or an hours long vacation. Or have a days long vacation if you do roadtrips, plus roadtrips are a legit (i.e. not just car related) vacation angle, amplified by a fun car.

Driving a fun car can reset human brains. IMHO.

And you don't need big dough. Just buy an old Beetle that runs well even if it may be a bit rusty (consider the flaws to be patina.) Maybe a convertible, there's not much price difference v a hardtop. And because you're not a loon car nut that is dialed into this or that particular specification or model you can get a so-called less disable Beetle such that you can get a lot of fun for not-big-dough. Many nice looking bugs are cheap to buy and maintain.

But if you want to go w/ a bit more dough maybe you should look for a Series III jag w/ a fully sorted engine swap. Then you can cruise cross country as you blow minds because nobody has seen a working series III for a very, very (if ever) long time.

Electric swapping a series III is even better.

OTOH, if you're thinking about old Jaguars and a possible EV swap, you may be better off getting a low mile (60,000 or less) XJR (the "R" is important: the supercharger is cool), and then driving it as a fun car for twenty thousand or so miles until EV swap tech is sorted such that you can sorta-easily do an EV swap (this may be ten years from now). The benefit here is that you have a car that from day one will work as a fun car because it still has the visual vibe of an olden days series III while it's not a total basket case like series IIIs are. Ford owned Jaguar at the time of the XJR and Ford's influence (if nothing else, Ford dumped/lost a bunch of dough into Jaguar) was helpful.

IMHO.

wendybar said...

Joe Biden is taking him up on the offer. He's coming back to DC to sign a bill Wednesday, and then heading back to his vacation villa that we are paying to put a wall up to keep us illegal citizens out. Must be nice to have month long vacations while the nation burns.

Old and slow said...

For me to relax and enjoy a trip, I need at least a full month. I need to settle in and live where I am going, and that certainly means having a kitchen. If you don't shop and cook your own meals, then you are constantly searching out places to eat unsatisfactory food (even if that food is very good). I just spent a month in Ireland with my two teenage sons and we had a great time. It took at least a week before we all found our niche and could relax and go about our business, sometimes together, sometimes not.

Ryan said...

Stephen you may be thinking of DFW?

Ann Althouse said...

"If you don't shop and cook your own meals, then you are constantly searching out places to eat unsatisfactory food (even if that food is very good)."

Yes, this is a big problem for me. First, with a very low sense of smell, eating even good food isn't that pleasurable for me, but worse, it's harder to detect bad food. And as an older person, I don't need much food, so I don't want to put much time, effort, and money into doing meals.

I think food is a big reason to travel for some people, but for me, it isn't. I rarely go to restaurants here at home, and I feel burdened by the need to constantly find restaurants and sit around in them.

tim maguire said...

When I was young, vacation usually meant visiting family because I didn't have a lot of money. Later it became about seeing the world. I'm glad I went to these places, but they weren't a lot of fun. They were a lot of walking and being hot and hungry and uncomfortable. But, again, I saw some great things that I'm glad I saw.

Today my vacations are about pacing myself--I like beaches where there is a lot of sitting around and reading. If I go somewhere that requires "exploring" (like a recent trip to Quebec City), I only plan 1 or 2 things a day and make room for downtime.

tim maguire said...

Old and slow said...I need to settle in and live where I am going, and that certainly means having a kitchen. If you don't shop and cook your own meals, then you are constantly searching out places to eat unsatisfactory food (even if that food is very good).

That's the one good thing I'll say about airbnb. Overall, I think the service is pretty scammy, but rental units almost always include a kitchen. Doing all your eating at restaurants means spending hundreds a day on food that often as not isn't very good, isn't healthy, and you spend a lot of time sitting at a table waiting or walking and looking for a decent place. I like a nice meal as much as the next guy, but you have to eat 3X a day--that can end up really dominating your experience and you feel like crap after a few days of eating like that. With airbnb, you can take yourself out of that cycle for as many meals as you want and save a lot of money doing it.

CJinPA said...

"Who are you with?" will decide the value of a vacation as much as or more than "Where are you going?"

ALP said...

A vacation is a short-term experience destined to become a long-term memory. But what if one can't remember shit? That's my problem with $ spent on vacation: my mind forgets things so quickly. I've always been more of a 'buy durable tools for hobbies' kind of gal. Or maybe travel to attend a workshop/training in something that interests me. Learning something I'll repeat in my 'normal' life does appeal to me.

Tim said...

Vacations are great. But you have to decide what you want in a vacation. The 7-day Alaska Cruise, with a two day stop in Washington to visit Mt. Rainier? Freaking fantastic, except for the downtown Seattle part on the Sunday we returned. We could have done without that, nasty, filthy place no longer worth spending a day. 3 days on a rented houseboat with my wife, sister and brother-in-law, and brother and sister-in-law? Priceless. Relaxing. Amazing even. 3 days driving around, spending the night in Cherokee and gambling a little, seeing mountain views and waterfalls and lakes in the Smokies with my bride? Relaxing beyond belief. We have one more planned for this year, a trip down the Natchez Trace stopping at every "point of interest" we can find, a night in Starkville or so, then on down for a night in the French Quarter and a nice French restaurant, just me and the bride again. Then over to Texas and up through Oklahoma and Iowa, Minnesota and the UP of Michigan, then down through Ohio, Penn, and WV. Looking to see some country this fall! Other than that, we have done 3 day trips to State Parks we had not seen yet, Big Ridge, Old Stone Fort and Cumberland Trail Justin Wilson State Park, all nice day trips. But I am not sure that they count as vacations now that we are retired!

stephen cooper said...

Ryan - yes. I often wonder if a large part of DFW's mental illness was just the basic fact that he never understood that no, it was not all right, it is never all right, not to care about other people.

That particular anecdote makes no sense to me, but I think it is true.
I literally have no idea why the poor guy screwed over the friends he made on the cruise ---- if you read his "prose", in his book about the cruise ---- prose of which he was very proud, I'm almost sure ---- it seems there is no question that he felt real friendship for them and then mocked them as much as he could - in a way that is creepier than I can imagine, in a way to impress his academic peers (his fellow "teachers of creative writing" - sad!") - in a way to be as cruel as he could, but of course in what he thought was a funny, well-written way that he could brag about.

Poor little guy, I feel so bad for him.

That was bad writing , and I do not understand it at all. I know people who met him said he was a decent guy, but how could he do that??? He literally befriended people in order to later "mock" them in his second-rate academic prose. I could understand it - barely,but I could understand it - if he were, like, a better writer than Shakespeare, but we all know he wasn't.