I heard this story read aloud when Sedaris did his show here in Madison 2 weeks ago. He said it would be in The New Yorker "next week," so I've been looking and looking. Finally! I love the whole thing, but the part I've been wanting to quote is beyond humor and startlingly dark.
Oh! The part I've been waiting to tell you about is not in the short bit that The New Yorker published. It was about abortion. It's hard to explain how a harsh view of abortion could have fit into the comical idea of Yelp reviews of Christmas, but let me try.
The fictional Yelp reviewer criticized Christmas for causing the abortion clinic to be closed and, from there, manifested her outrageously self-centered character. She wanted the abortion for Christmas so she could — am I remembering this correctly?! — give it as a present to her ex.
It was way over the top, to the point where it would upset pro-abortion readers, because it wasn't just the usual refraining from discussing what is happening to the child as murder. The woman reveled in murdering the child. I thought: I need to see this in print.
From the version of the story that made it into The New Yorker, there's a 1-star review: "I like Christmas, except it has too many nuts in it and I’m allergic. There are nuts in the cookies—not all, but some—and even in the songs! I don’t think this is fair to people such as myself. Christmas needs to be more inclusive."
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Well...on that note- and I knew there would be a note like this today, I'm going to wish you and Meade a very Merry Christmas. I hope you two have a peaceful day and love whatever it is that you find happiness doing on that day.
As for me and Ms. Temujin, we'll be outside enjoying the 75° sunny day forecast for Sarasota.
Merry Christmas to all Althousians!
Once you accept abortion as legalized murder; it makes Everything easier
"That little Bastard wanted to live in my womb, rent free! So i murdered him!"
"that bitch wasn't going to make the NFL! So i murdered her!"
What about Rape? and Incest? Problems Solved!
"That F*cker RAPED me! I may not be able to Kill him; but i sure as hell can murder his son!"
"Daddy's f*cking me! I can't stop him; but i can take it out on his other daughter!"
Legalized Murder Safe! Legal!! Fun!!!
"She wanted the abortion for Christmas so she could — am I remembering this correctly?! — give it as a present to her ex."
That is such a sweet, caring woman. Will murdered baby be gift wrapped?
And she's generous too. She could have sold the body parts.
'It was way over the top, to the point where it would upset pro-abortion readers, because it wasn't just the usual refraining from discussing what is happening to the child as murder. The woman reveled in murdering the child.'
You mean like when those women were making a big show out of gleefully taking morning after pills on the steps of the Supreme Court recently?
That kind of reveling?
'She could have sold the body parts.'
She still could.
You know, use the money for a nice cordless razor or maybe a bread board...
The woman reveled in murdering the child.
I am getting the impression through my reading that this sentiment, while still rare, is not at all unheard of.
Way back in the 70s and early 80s when I was studying history and polisci, Wymyn were starting to roar, and when it came to abortion I found that many of them used 'ease and frequency of abortion' as an important factor in evaluating a social system, past or present.
It took me a while, but I came to realize that for many of these women abortion had already become a sacrament, and countries where the abortion rate per womb was highest were the best countries in their weltanschaung.
That said, I'll skip Sedaris and his critics on this one.
Merry Christmas to all, especially Christians.
and people complain that the progressive left aren't religious!
You can NOT get much more religious, than worshiping Moloch
Give me that Old Time Religion! that Old Time baby murdering religion!!
All Hail Moloch! All Hail Big Brother!!! All Hail the State!!! All Hail the Party!!
These same people think they can re-imagine society into a form we'll all love, cherish and obey like bride or like a D-Day soldier, till death do us part. Yet they can't even bake for themselves a dozen cookies the way they themselves would like them, let alone conceive a child they would want. Oh well, I suppose the writer and commenter are saying just that. Well then, Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas Professor Althouse (and minions)
I've Been as good as i CAN be.
I have red hair, you know.
Yes, more inclusive. Baby Lives Matter
It does not serve the best interests of the individual, the couple, society, and humanity to normalize elective abortion for social, redistributive, and fair weather causes.
That said, there is no mystery in sex and conception. A woman and man have four choices, a right to self-defense through reconciliation, and still six weeks to functional viability, including: the first heart beat, the emergence of a coherent nervous system, and life until our last breath, our final heart beat, and entropic conclusion.
Merry Christmas!
In my 1970s preteen years, dead baby jokes were all the rage. The cycle has come full circle, back to such humor. And on Xmas Eve!
What's better, a truckload of rocks or a truckload of dead babies? The dead babies, because you can't unload a truckload of rocks with a pitchcork.
"She wanted the abortion for Christmas so she could — am I remembering this correctly?! — give it as a present to her ex."
A reproductive rite. Perhaps an affirmation to keep women appointed, available, and taxable. And, apparently, young, literally, and in color, to mitigate the risk of undesirable and pathogenic attributes.
Heard his Christmas Elf bit on NPR yesterday. It was funny the first two times (out of about ten) they played it that morning. Turns out Mrs. NorthOfTheOneOhOne went to high school with one of his younger siblings.
Anyway, Merry Christmas to all!
Ho Hum. Sedaris is just typing it in. Snarky reviews are commonplace, and no less creative.
I've been watching one of the "Narcos" series on Netflix recently. A favourite technique to settle a score is to send the severed head of someone's son/brother/associate to them. Sending an aborted fetus to a cheating boyfriend/husband would certainly send a message.
Abortion snuff film fantasies for Christmas, yeah.
Abortion For Christmas: I don't think Hallmark TV is quite ready for that yet.
The New Yorker would not let me in to read the reviews; so I have not read those on abortion. However, I read several others elsewhere, and they are hillarius and right on target.
If only Sedaris had been aborted we could have been spared this unpleasant Christmas eve blog post.
I'm surprised anyone who holds feminist views can't seem to see Sedaris' seething misogyny. This is far from the only example.
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