Asks Hayley Phelan in "Will You Be My #Content?/For social media influencers and oversharers, life is full of material. But what if their friends don’t want to be the co-stars?" by (NYT).
The answer to "If their friends are sharing every single day of their lives, can they reasonably expect to be asked for consent every single day?" is: YES!
This is like the question whether marital rape is possible. There used to be a theory that you gave your consent once and for all or that your status as spouse equals consent.
Obviously, there are some differences. Rape is a crime and writing about people who don't want to be written about is not a crime and cannot be made into a crime. But we're talking about taking advantage of your intimate access to other people and the ethics of how you are treating them.
“These are the questions I grapple with on a daily basis,” said Caroline Calloway, 28, the Instagrammer whose viral shenanigans have garnered her 722,000 followers and plenty of headlines.Garnered.
Yet this fall, when she began dating a model, she started to rethink her strategy. “I’ve learned firsthand how much it can complicate a relationship,” she said.... While she continued to share personal conversations and details of their sex life, she also went to great lengths to keep his identity hidden, disguising his face by placing a bright blue butterfly emoji over it in the posts....We're not told whether he consented to any or all of that.
In “Discipline and Punish,” the French philosopher Michel Foucault theorized that the mere suggestion of surveillance is enough to alter our behavior, as we internalize expectations and monitor ourselves in an effort to conform to them. This was, to Foucault, ultimately more threatening to an individual’s personal freedom than actually being locked up behind bars....
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Foucault. He enjoyed to much freedom. An irresponsible guy.
Unfriend the blabbermouth, then ze could not keep blabbering about you.
People who continue to socialize with people who constantly post photos of every event, grin for every photo, and never object, are granting a form of consent. If they don't like it they need to take some responsibility and do something about it other than passive after-the-fact bitching.
Instagrammer. At last, a competitor to grammarly.
When I had a facebook account, I specifically directed friends not to 'tag' me. This was because A) I don't believe in the curated life and B) my 'work' at the time made anonymity critically important.
Yes, you have a right. Yes, I've 'lost' friends over it. Yes, I've enraged exes who found out they had nothing to hold over my head. Request anonymity and make sure you enforce it.
"In “Discipline and Punish,” the French philosopher Michel Foucault theorized that the mere suggestion of surveillance is enough to alter our behavior, as we internalize expectations and monitor ourselves in an effort to conform to them. This was, to Foucault, ultimately more threatening to an individual’s personal freedom than actually being locked up behind bars...."
All the major religions propose that we are under surveillance at all times by a moral judge & jury. This is a trivial truth, I assume Foucault discussed this.
This is like the question whether marital rape is possible. There used to be a theory that you gave your consent once and for all or that your status as spouse equals consent.
That's not the theory.
The theory was that rape is a crime against feminine modesty, and in the case of marriage that's not possible. It is, however, still assault and battery. The question is getting the right charge, not whether conssent is implied.
Is the aruba as fresh as can be?
These are the questions I grapple with on a daily basis.
Big Sister is watching you!
The increasing rate of tecnilogical change is overwhelming the ability of human interactions to adapt to it. This is one small example. Are we surrendering our right to privacy by participating in this aspect of it? Next week something different.
So, privacy is propositional, not limited to professional or hobbyist inclusion. Anything can be made a crime or not a crime, an ethical or relativistic religious standard, or sociopolitically congruent construct. Rape is a combination of involuntary (superior?) exploitation and battery.
As Instapundit oft opines: "211st Century problems!".
You should be able to expect a friend to respect your privacy. But if you really value your privacy, don't hang out with media whores.
Isn't the oddity to be "un-surveilled" rather than "surveilled"?
When you drive your car, you are in a windowed box with a unique ID bolted to the bumper. When you surf the web, your activities can be monitored. How many computer-controlled cameras are there in your house? Cell phones have two cameras, pointing in opposite directions.
To be a social creature is to be surveilled, since social creatures interact in ways that are significant to other social creatures.
Where does Foucault think the value lies in "personal freedom"? In public life the only place we have a legitimate expectation of being un-surveilled is in the toilet. What do people do in the toilet (other than the obvious)? Have sex. Masturbate. Use drugs. Meet people that they do not want to be seen with. In public schools, the lack of surveillance in the rest rooms leads to, you guessed it, assault and drug use.
Sometimes films have scenes set in public restrooms. It would be an interesting project for a film student to analyze & critique these scenes, what information did they contain, why were they set in a public toilet, etc.
Everyone knows people who are gossips and blabbermouths. Tell them something and the next day everyone from here to Timbuktu knows about it. So, you're just very careful as to what you say. These people will also swear up and down, that they will never AGAIN repeat what you say. and then 50% of the time do it anyway. Because they can't help it.
Friends of novelists have the same problem, they'll end up as thinly disguised characters - to their chagrin. Some end up suing.
It doesn't seem like a hard thing to settle. There can be a general understanding between friends that the experiences of the influencer are fair game to go online. A commonsensical application of the "Don't be a Dick" rule can cover most grey areas. In any particularly embarrassing situations, the person should ask not to be included and the influencer should ask for permission.
Marital rape is pretty much the same thing--if you have respect and caring in your relationship, then you have general permission to have sex, tempered with the consideration to not push it if your partner doesn't seem interested tonight.
If I'm part of your content and you're getting paid, I expect to be paid, too.
I was stopped by a tv reporter once that wanted to ask some questions and she didn't appreciate my requirement that I get paid.
A French philosopher walks into a bar and the bartender asks him if he's an alcoholic and the philosopher says, "je ne pense pas que je suis", so the bartender asks what he wants and soon serves him a strong, refreshing pastis. Yuck.
"If the crowd gathered round the scaffold, it was not simply to witness the sufferings of the condemned man or to excite the anger of the executioner: it was also to hear an individual who had nothing more to lose curse the judges, the laws, the government and religion."
If I have people over who post a lot on social media, I tell them that I don't want the gathering posted. Everyone has respected that.
This here is as social-media as I get, and on the rare occasions when we entertain at home, I just sit in my recliner with music on low, and ignore the fact that many of our visitors are more interested in their phones than in us or each other . . . For all I know they post reams of info about where they are and who they're with.
In Europe in November for two weeks, I took four pix with my flip-phone; my wife and her friends took and posted dozens or more for their far-flung networks. I saw two or three (lookin' GOOD Narr-man!)
Narr
As I get older, I find knowledge like this useful in pruning relationships.
I'd answer None, because like rape, you may have legal recourse or ethical high ground, but your expectation should be none such that you take precaution rather than have regrets. In short, make better friends that are less likely to take advantage and abuse you.
Lewis Wetzel said...
Isn't the oddity to be "un-surveilled" rather than "surveilled"?
Apparantly there are companies that can use facial recognition to use a photo of you to bring up thousands of videos captured on public security cameras.
I predict a day when it will be common to wear masks when in public. Pillow case type masks. But decorative and well fitting. Masks for different occasions, like shirts, pants, jackets and shoes.
Designer masks, WalMart masks, counterfeit knock-offs.
American versions of "Niqab. The niqab is a veil that covers the face,"
My sister and mother post things I'm not on social media in part because I have a more conservative standard of privacy than they do. That encourages them to post more personal things about me. They think it's funny..
Good lord. Marital rape. You had me and then you lost me.
This sounds like it could be written about Taylor Swift and the Guys that might date her. If/when it goes sour they might end up as the subject of her next song. Did her exes consent to have their dating history become fodder for a swift pop song?
Obviously, there are some differences. Rape is a crime and writing about people who don't want to be written about is not a crime and cannot be made into a crime.
No, actually, violating people's privacy can be a crime, depending upon the State.
For a simple example: posting nude pictures of people without their consent.
This is not a new problem. I used to know writers and aspiring writers who walked SF conventions wearing a pin that said something like "I will be writing about you in my next book."
So, the short answer is:
For the friends: If you don't want them to violate your privacy, don't hang out with them.
For the writers: If you don't want to lose your best friends, talk with them before you post anything about them, find out what they're comforatbale with, and never, ever, violate a friend's trust
I've seen videos in which the blogger blurs and/or mutes innocent bystanders, including friends. Unless it's in a public space, and about a newsworthy event, a decent person would have the civility to leave others out of it unless he first garners express permission to include them. No bullshit.
"Rape is a crime and writing about people who don't want to be written about is not a crime and cannot be made into a crime."
Is it not a crime? What about my violating my constitutional right to privacy? It is in the constitution, isn't it? That's what I was told.
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Caroline Calloway. Jaysus H. Kee-ryst. The "influencer" who abused her relationships, burned her publisher, and scammed her followers. How is it she still gets a mention in a NYT piece?
For those unfamiliar with this narcissistic beast: https://www.thecut.com/2019/09/the-story-of-caroline-calloway-and-her-ghostwriter-natalie.html
Caroline Calloway. Jaysus H. Kee-ryst. The "influencer" who abused her relationships, burned her publisher, and scammed her followers. How is it she still gets a mention in a NYT piece?
She seems to fit in with them real well...
What about my violating my constitutional right to privacy? It is in the constitution, isn't it?
Ah, yes, the Twilight Amendment, the wicked solution and other non-crimes. The State-established Pro-Choice religion is, in principle, selective, opportunistic, and politically congruent.
"Good lord. Marital rape. You had me and then you lost me."
Why? Do you dispute that one party to a marriage (or non-married sexual relationship) can rape the other?
All I can ever see, now, is garnered (the word!) everywhere!
...I predict a day when it will be common to wear masks when in public. Pillow case type masks. But decorative and well fitting. Masks for different occasions, like shirts, pants, jackets and shoes....
Which will become illegal to wear in public. There are places in Britain where they are getting comfortable with a ban on baseball hats and hoodies because it makes it difficult for cameras to identify you.
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